


Tender Loving Care

by Predec2



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M, Medical, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-03 22:00:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 135,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2889431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Predec2/pseuds/Predec2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Justin's a PIFA student working as an orderly at the local hospital who befriends a sick little boy.  But just who will be the lucky one to receive some much-needed TLC?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sweet Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> I had a request to post this story here on AO3. For those who haven't read it before, I hope you enjoy it. It's multi-chaptered, but is NOT a WIP. I will try to upload the chapters as quickly as I can.
> 
> Story Disclaimer: All QAF characters are the property of Cowlip Productions and Showtime; no copyright infringement is intended.

 

* * *

 

_Kinnetik - Early Morning_

 

Brian sighed heavily as he held his cell phone out from his body and rolled his eyes before placing it back against his ear.

 

"No," he snapped. "I think _every_ growing boy needs an occasional drag of weed and some poppers to stunt his growth. Give me a fucking break, okay?"

 

"You think I would be surprised?" Mel retorted. "I remember what happened the last time we left him in your care."

 

Brian shook his head. "Number one - that was more than two years ago; and number two - it's not my fault if dildos float in the sink - the lad was just having fun playing with his toys, just like me."

 

Mel huffed in exasperation. "I'm serious, Brian! We're counting on you to be the _grownup_ this time, if you can! Trust me, if we had any other choice, you'd be the _last_ person we'd leave him with for a weekend!"

 

Brian let out an angry breath. "Well I'm so humbled by your confidence in my abilities, Mel," he responded sarcastically, his icy voice filled with contempt. "I hate to remind you, but he's MY son, too, and I deserve time with him. I'm quite capable of taking care of him so just fucking back off, okay?" He could hear Lindsay in the background, trying fervently to calm her irascible partner down, just before there was a clunking sort of sound on the other end and his friend picked up the phone. "What time should we drop him off, Brian?" Lindsay asked him a little wearily, obviously tired of arguing about the arrangements with her partner.

 

Brian sighed, at least relived that Hurricane Mel had come and passed. "What time does your plane leave again?" He remembered it was sometime later this afternoon but he had forgotten the exact flight schedule in the normal hustle and bustle of his agency; they had just signed on five new, heavy-hitting clients and he had been up to his eyeballs in storyboards and graphics lately. He was actually looking forward to taking care of his four-year-old son for the long, three-day Memorial Day weekend; to him, just being diverted temporarily from the shitload of work he had for Kinnetik would be like getting a mini-vacation himself.

 

"The plane leaves here at 5:00, so we probably need to get to the airport no later than 3."

 

"I think I can get away a little early today. How about you drop him off here at 2, then?"

 

Lindsay replied gratefully, "That sounds perfect, Brian - thanks. We owe you a big one for this; I really hated to miss out on this - you don't have a free trip handed to you every day."

 

"Yeah, I'd jump at the chance to visit Myrtle Beach," Brian joked. "All those putt-putt golf courses, all those whiny kids, all those little old men trying to run you over with their souped-up golf carts…."

 

Lindsay smiled at his rather comedic description of their vacation destination. "Well, it may not sound like Miami Beach to you, Mr. Kinney, but to two lesbians who haven't had any time away since our son's been born, it sounds like paradise to us." Lindsay's old college sorority sister, whom she had kept in contact with over the years, had called her last week when she found out she couldn't use a timeshare week she owned for a condo there, and the two women had jumped at the chance.

 

Mel, of course, wasn't very happy with the babysitter they had been stuck with by process of elimination – all the other _reliable_ ones were either busy, sick, or out of town – but the idea of a free, oceanfront vacation was just too good for them to pass up, so she had reluctantly agreed to let Brian watch Gus. That didn't mean she wouldn't be scared to death until they got back, though.

 

"Well, you girls go have fun and us boys will find a way to entertain ourselves, don't worry," Brian assured the woman teasingly as Lindsay looked over at her partner and tried to smile at her reassuringly. Mel, however, simply glared back at her skeptically.

 

"Thanks," Lindsay repeated. "We'll be by at 2:00." Just before she could hang up the phone, though, Brian heard another voice in the background. "Oh, just a second, Brian – someone else wants to speak to you." Brian could almost detect the amusement in her voice as he smiled and soon heard someone chirp, "Hi, Daddy!" back at him enthusiastically.

 

Brian beamed at the familiar sound. "Sonny Boy!" he answered in delight. "How's my little man?"

 

"I'm good, Daddy! I'm coming to visit you!" the little boy confirmed, the eager anticipation obvious in the tone of his voice. "We're going to have fun!"

 

Brian laughed in spite of himself; no matter how stressful his day might be, this little copy of himself always seemed to lighten his mood. "We sure are, Buddy," he agreed. "How about we have some pizza for dinner tonight and watch a couple of movies?" He really had no clue what four-year-old boys liked to watch nowadays, but he figured one of the clerks down at the local video store could help him out with that dilemma on his way home. A couple of movies and some cheese-laden pizza later and he figured Gus would soon be out like a light in la-la land; this babysitting would be a piece of cake, he figured. Plus, if he were honest with himself, he would sincerely enjoy spending time with Gus. Unlike most people, his son never questioned everything he did and never looked for ulterior motives in every action he took, and he always made him smile; there weren't too many other people – maybe _no_ one else – who he could say that about.

 

"Yay!" Gus shouted as Brian smiled. "Mom – We're having pizza for dinner!" he could hear his little boy shouting to his mothers; he rolled his eyes as he heard Mel distinctly saying, no doubt to Lindsay, "Well, that's an improvement over the poppers anyway."

 

"Still there, Buddy?" he asked his son.

 

"Yeah, Daddy," he heard Gus say. "What else are we going to do?"

 

Brian grinned. "Not sure, Gus, but we'll talk about it later when I see you, okay?"

 

"Okay, Daddy," he answered happily. "I'll see you later."

 

"Sure thing, Sonny Boy, see you soon," Brian responded, still unable to keep the amused smile off his face. He waited a few moments before Lindsay came back on the phone to confirm the time they would be coming over before she said her goodbye and they hung up the phone.

 

He just had enough time to ponder where to stop on the way home before he was summoned to yet another meeting in the conference room and thoughts of his impending task was temporarily shuffled aside.

 

 

* * *

  

 

_Loft – 6:00 p.m._

 

Brian looked over at his son in amazement; the boy had just polished off his fourth piece of pepperoni pan pizza and showed no signs of stopping as he reached over to take a swig of his apple juice before moving on to tackle one of the still-warm cinnamon sticks for dessert. He furrowed his brow and shook his head. "Surely you're not still hungry, Sonny Boy? Aren't you full yet?" The two "men" were sitting with their backs against Brian's couch on a large, oval, beige-colored plush rug while they watched the second movie Brian had picked out – _Finding Nemo_ – about a fish lost in the New York sewer system.

 

Gus shook his head as Brian reached over to ruffle his hair affectionately. He picked up another cinnamon stick and held it out to his father, who hesitated a few seconds before finally smiling congenially and opening his mouth up enough to accept a small bite of the gooey, sticky confection. "Mmmm," he proclaimed, smacking his lips dramatically, as Gus laughed at his antics. Brian couldn't help grinning back at him in response before suddenly he pounced on his son and began to tickle him mercilessly for a few seconds until the two of them fell to the floor, the little boy on top of his father's chest as his own chest heaved from the temporary exertion.

 

As he gazed into the twinkling, sparkling greenish-blue eyes, Brian's heart swelled with love for this perfect little human being. He still found it amazing how a son he never imagined he would ever want – or even contemplate – had entered his life so unexpectedly and had managed to wind his way into his heart so deeply and so irrevocably. Mel might never understand or believe it, but now that he was used to the idea – and had gotten the chance to get to know his son – he couldn't imagine life without him now.

 

Gus lifted his head up to stare into his father's face and state solemnly, "Daddy, you're so silly."

 

Brian grinned back at him before hugging him tightly to his chest. He had to laugh a few minutes later, though, when he eventually released his son only to have him sit up next to him and say, "Can we have popcorn now?" He shook his head as he grinned and rose to find a small snack-sized bag to place into the microwave as his son plodded along eagerly behind him.

 

* * *

 

_Ten O'clock_

 

Between the excitement of spending time with his father, eating way too much food, and getting to stay up a little later than he normally would to watch both movies, Gus had managed to stay awake for an hour past his normal bedtime. As Brian turned out the lights in the living area of the loft, he gazed tenderly down at the sleepy-eyed, yawning little boy curled up now on the couch, a light, fleece, navy-blue blanket tucked around him. His small frame was dwarfed by the large, leather sofa as he lay in one corner and gazed up at his father.

 

Brian walked a few steps to tenderly scoop his tired son up into his arms, blanket and all. "Time for bed, Sonny Boy," he softly crooned as the little boy nestled his dark head against his father's chest and snuggled into his touch. He wondered briefly about the irony of taking _any_ male to his bed before midnight, much less staying in on a Friday night, before he slowly and carefully walked his son over to his king-sized bed and gently leaned down with one hand to push the duvet aside and lay Gus down under the covering.

 

Gently placing the cover back over the petite body, he watched as Gus' eyes struggled to stay open as he reached over to retrieve his son's favorite toy from the nightstand – a long-eared, floppy, light gray-colored rabbit named Hoppy. The little boy stretched out his arms to cradle it against his chest as Brian placed it in his arms and reached down to brush some stray hair out of his son's bangs.

 

"Are you coming to bed, Daddy?" the little boy asked sleepily, his rosy cheeks and dark eyes painting a picture at the moment of a perfect angel, even though Brian knew that wasn't always the case. It still didn't make his son any less special in his eyes, though, as he gazed back at the little boy tenderly and smiled. If all the boys at Babylon could see and hear him now, he thought, as to his own amazement, he nodded back at his son and walked around the bed to sit on the edge of it, long enough to take his shirt and pants off.

 

Turning the duvet back to slide his brief-clad, long body into the bed beside his son, he turned to face the little boy long enough to say, "Good night, Buddy. Sweet dreams." He reached over to plant a small kiss on the boy's left cheek for a moment before pulling back to drink in the sight of this beautiful little child, a creation that somehow he had miraculously helped to make.

 

"Good night, Daddy," Gus whispered back as he yawned. Just before his eyes closed in slumber, Brian heard him whisper, "I love you, Daddy."

 

Brian's eyes misted over as he whispered back, "I love you, too, Gus," before turning off everything but the soft glow emitted from the orange lights over the bed and closing his eyes, also.

 

 


	2. The Art of Compassion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian experiences a shocking discovery regarding his son.

_Midnight – Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh_

 

"Justin! What are you doing here? I thought your shift was over at eleven."

 

Justin glanced up from the bed sheets he was changing and smiled at the young resident who had noticed him as she walked by the now-unoccupied room. "Hi, Dr. Chan….uh, _Daphne_ ," he corrected himself, remembering that the young woman had told him to call her by her first name, at least when they were alone. Daphne was a first-year resident at the hospital and was only a few years older than Justin. They had met a couple of weeks ago when Justin had started working at the hospital as an orderly and had struck up a friendship with her when she had caught him sketching a picture of her on the back of a patient registration form and asked him about it. She had been struck by his artistic talent and had found out that he was working at the hospital as a way to help fund his college tuition at PIFA.

 

Since then, they had run into each other numerous times in the course of their jobs and found that they shared a great deal of interests – the same taste in music, the same love for children, and the same fondness for pizza – the loaded and the greasier, the better. Normally, Justin worked the second shift from 3 – 11 so he would have enough time to grab some sleep and head off to art school, but with it being a Friday he had agreed to work a few extra hours as a favor to a fellow co-worker who needed some time off.

 

"Yeah, it was," he answered her congenially as she walked into the room to stand by the bed. "I offered to work a couple extra hours for one of the other orderlies. I'm getting off at two tonight."

 

"Well, I definitely know what it's like to work extra hours," she said with a yawn. She placed her hands at the small of her back and leaned backward in an attempt to loosen some of the stiff muscles there.

 

"You do look pretty beat," Justin observed sympathetically, noticing the drawn lines on her light-skinned face. "What time did you come in today?" He knew from what his new friend had told him earlier that as a resident she had to work ridiculously-long hours; it made him exhausted just thinking about it.

 

She scrunched up her face in thought. "Let me think – all the days tend to run together lately," she said wryly. "But I think I came in at 6."

 

Justin looked at her aghast. "Six _a.m._? Shit, Daphne, no wonder you look dead on your feet – no offense," he hastened to add teasingly.

 

She nodded. "One of the joys of being in medicine," she told him facetiously. "And speaking of which, I'd better get going – I've still got to do rounds on the sixth floor." She turned to go before adding, "How about pizza for lunch later? I think they're giving me parole for a couple hours in the middle of the day; it helps to prevent mutinies among the medical students."

 

Justin laughed. "Anything to contribute to your delinquency," he told her. "You want to meet at Roberto's?" The iconic Italian restaurant a couple of blocks away had quickly become their main gathering spot around the hospital – their deep pan, handmade-crust pepperoni pizzas had quickly become their all-time favorite, high-carb food.

 

"Sounds great," she said, nodding. "One o'clock?" As Justin nodded in acceptance, she quickly bid him a brief goodbye and rushed out with a wave as she disappeared out of sight.

 

Finished with replacing the sheets, Justin sat down for just a moment and sighed; changing bedding and restocking the janitorial supplies and towels wasn't the most fascinating or exciting job, but he _did_ find certain parts of it very rewarding, such as talking to the young patients as he wheeled them downstairs for tests, or bringing their lunches to them so he had a chance to cheer them up. Sometimes it was extremely hard to keep a smile on his face when he knew some of them were seriously ill – some even terminal – but the light that would come into their eyes when he entered their room or the hugs and/or kisses he would receive after he had drawn a picture for them made it all worthwhile, and he liked to think that it also helped to lighten their load just a bit. The truth was, he thought _he_ was the one who got the most out of his encounters with them. He felt terrible on the rare occasions when he was unable to work due to illness; fortunately he did not get sick too often, but when he _did_ and was unable to come to work, he actually felt guilty about it; that was how seriously he took his responsibility to them.

 

Rolling the soiled bedding into a tight ball, he dropped it into the nearby hamper and turned to walk out of the room and into the next one to repeat the same procedure; the hospital was fairly quiet and empty tonight. Some nights it was boisterous and hectic, other times, like tonight, it was pretty uneventful. He actually preferred these types of nights because it gave him a chance to check up on some of his favorite patients and spend more time with them. Of course, most of them would be in bed asleep by now, but he always found a few that were struggling to drift off. He's not sure how he had thought of it initially, but normally he could soothe any troubles they were having with either a custom-drawn caricature of them or by simply holding their hand and singing softly to them until their eyelids fluttered closed and they fell into slumber. He liked the fact that he could provide some additional comfort to the children whose parents couldn't be with them all the time.

 

He smiled, for instance, at the thought of the little, blond-haired girl named Ashley in Room 507. A regular tomboy according to her parents, the little five-year-old child had sustained a broken leg after falling out of a sprawling maple tree in the front yard of her home. She had been admitted yesterday and was due to go home tomorrow after having a bright pink cast applied to her leg earlier today. When Justin had first brought her lunch yesterday, she had been sullen and withdrawn. Ten minutes and a quick sketch of her later, however, and the little girl was all smiles, along with her grateful parents, who had slipped out just long enough to grab a bite themselves and had returned while Justin was still there. Yes, it was times like those that made his sometimes tedious job worthwhile.

 

He was about to enter the next room when he heard one of the nurses calling him, requesting that he go down to the first-floor commissary for some extra blankets. He glanced up at the clock – one more hour to go. Nodding at the dark-haired, bespectacled nurse, he turned toward the freight elevator and waited for the car to arrive.

 

* * *

 

_Same Time – Brian's Loft_

 

"Daddy?" The voice was soft and plaintive from the other side of Brian's massive bed, but Brian nonetheless heard it immediately and awakened quickly. "What is it, Buddy?" he asked tenderly as he turned on his side to face his son. He was surprised after the big day Gus had had that he was awake; earlier he had gone to sleep practically as soon as he had laid his head down on the pillow.

 

"I don't feel so good," his son responded, his voice sounding hesitant and almost faraway. "My tummy and my head hurt."

 

Brian smiled; after everything the little boy had eaten earlier that evening, it was no wonder he was feeling ill, especially with a tummy ache. He reached over with the intention of reassuring his son that everything would be all right when his hand made contact with Gus' forehead and he shrank back as if he had been scorched. The little boy's head was burning up with fever.

 

He immediately twisted around to switch on the side lamp and turned to get a better look at his little boy. Gus's dark hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat, his face was pale and he was holding his stomach with his hands.

 

"Daddy, I think I'm going to be sick," he announced suddenly. Not taking any chances, Brian quickly threw the covers aside and scooped the feather-light body into his arms to rush toward the bathroom. He just managed to gently place his son down in front of the toilet before Gus promptly threw up – twice.

 

Now Brian was really concerned as he reached for a nearby towel and tenderly wiped his son's face and pulled him into his lap to hold him as the little body trembled with the aftereffects. He slowly rose with his son still nestled in his arms to walk over to a small drawer in the bathroom vanity and pull out a thermometer. He had fortunately taken Lindsay's advice a few months ago and had picked up a newfangled type of thermometer he had never heard of before – all he had to do was supposedly gently swipe it over Gus' forehead and it would painlessly give him his son's temperature. He had never used it before, but at that moment he was grateful that he had purchased it recently.

 

"I'm going to take your temperature, okay, Sonny Boy?" he told his son softly as the little boy snuggled into his chest and nodded. Brian took the instrument out of the package, and tossing the plastic into the garbage, he flipped the thermometer on and slowly swept it over his son's pale, sweaty forehead. He heard a quiet beep to indicate a reading had been taken and brought the instrument up to his eyes to read the LCD printout: 102.4.

 

Brian's eyes widened in concern; he didn't want to get Gus scared, but this was bad – first vomiting, then a high fever. What he knew about children and what constituted an emergency could fit in the palm of his hand, but this certainly seemed to qualify as one to him. How to know for sure, though? And what should he do about Mel and Lindsay? If he called them, they would no doubt either panic or accuse him of neglecting their son or both, even though he had been nothing but attentive toward Gus since the moment he had taken custody of him. And if he _didn't_ call them, and something happened to his and their son, they would never forgive him.

 

"Do you feel like you're going to throw up again, Buddy?" he asked the little boy softly as he lay his head against the soft brown hair.

 

"No, Daddy," Gus told him. "But my head and neck still hurt."

 

His neck? He hadn't mentioned that before. Brian had heard enough – he would take care of his son first and worry about the consequences later. "We're going to go take a little trip, Sonny Boy," he told his son tenderly. "We're going to find someone to make you feel better."

 

He slowly walked over to the bed and laid his son down temporarily while he quickly donned a pair of jeans and a dark-blue cable sweater. Thinking of one more thing, he hurried back into the bathroom to pull the medicine drawer open and retrieve some chewable children's acetaminophen for his son to take on the way to the hospital.

 

Grabbing his keys off the night table, he once more scooped his now-lethargic, pajama-clad son into his arms and, retrieving both their lightweight jackets from the back of a nearby chair, hurried toward the door and yanked it open.

 

* * *

 

_Fifteen Minutes Later_

 

Brian drove like a bat out of hell to get his son to the Children's Hospital downtown; he had never been to this particular hospital before, but he had fortunately driven by it so many times prior to tonight that he knew the quickest and most direct way to get there. With the light traffic at this time of night – plus his lack of hesitation in running several red lights – he came to a screech in front of the emergency room in record time. Barely taking time to put his car in park, he hurriedly opened the driver's door and ran around to open the opposite door to unlatch his son's seatbelt and pick him up into his arms. He noticed with alarm that Gus was breathing shallowly and was barely responsive to him now. "Gus?" he whispered worriedly. "Can you hear me?" His son didn't answer as Brian made a beeline for the double doors that fortunately whooshed open automatically as he approached them.

 

"I need some help!" he shouted, oblivious to whoever was in the waiting room. This couldn't wait – he didn't know if it was some instinctive thing that a parent just had toward their child or not, but he knew somehow that his son needed to be seen immediately. "Somebody help me!" he shouted once more. "I need a fucking doctor NOW!"

 

A rather heavyset, short, dark-haired nurse came rushing out from behind the nurses' station toward him. She took one look at the pale, sweaty complexion of the little boy being held in Brian's arms and instructed him, "Come with me," before she turned and hurried through the double, swinging doors into the actual emergency room center. "We need a gurney ASAP!" she shouted authoritatively as two tall, lanky men in Sponge Bob Squarepants uniforms came rushing up, wheeling a gurney.

 

Brian hesitated, not wanting to remove Gus from his arms but knowing if he wanted his son to get treatment, he needed to. He reluctantly placed his son gently down on the sheet-covered gurney but held tightly onto his hand. "I'm going to be right here, Sonny Boy," he whispered to his son in a desperate attempt to reassure his little boy, but Gus didn't seem to hear. His eyes were closed and his breathing was labored.

 

"Let's get him into a room," the nurse told the two men. "Put him in Bed 7." As they began to wheel Gus down the hall at a fairly fast clip, Brian kept pace with them, his hand never leaving his son's. After several seconds, the two men made a sharp turn and stopped at the first room on the right.

 

"I'm going to summon the doctor first," the nurse told Brian, "and then we'll need to get some information from you." Brian nodded his understanding, too upset at the moment to verbalize his concern as the nurse hurried from the cubicle in search of the emergency room doctor assigned for the night.

 

A few seconds later, Brian looked up to see a man and a woman following the nurse back in. The man, who was wearing a white, mid-length medical coat and a stethoscope around his neck, appeared to be a little older than Brian with almost coal-black, wavy hair and green eyes. The woman who had arrived with him was also wearing a similar length white coat but was considerably younger. Brian estimated she was probably in her early twenties.

 

"I'm Doctor Broderick," the older man told Brian. He glanced over at the brunet female doctor and said, "And this is a resident in training here at the hospital, Dr. Chanders."

 

Brian nodded at the introduction but didn't shake their hands – he wasn't about to let go of Gus. "Brian Kinney," he told them, glancing over at his son. "And this is my son, Gus."

 

Dr. Broderick nodded as the two women listened to the conversation. "And how old is Gus?"

 

"He just turned four a couple of months ago," Brian told him.

 

The nurse began to write some information down on the clipboard in her hand as Brian answered the doctor's question. Broderick nodded over at the female resident who walked over to the other side of Gus' gurney and took the stethoscope from around her neck; she gently unbuttoned the little boy's pajama top to place the instrument lightly against his chest to listen to his heartbeat.

 

"Can you tell me what happened?" The doctor asked.

 

"He came over for a visit earlier today – he lives with his mother – and we ate some pizza and watched some movies before going to bed around 10. He was sleeping on the other side of my bed and woke me up around midnight to tell me his stomach and head hurt. He then threw up a few minutes later in the bathroom. I took his temperature right after that and it was 102.4. I gave him some chewable Tylenol on the way here." He gazed down alarmed at his son, who hadn't stirred since he had placed him in the car earlier. "He was answering my questions earlier at my loft and now he's not even awake. What's wrong with him?" He swallowed the lump of concern in his throat as he gazed at his son, who looked so small and vulnerable on the gurney.

 

"That's what we'll have to find out," Dr. Bradshaw told him. "We'll have to run some tests. Was there anything else he complained about earlier?"

 

Brian shook his head initially before remembering something. "Wait – he did say his neck hurt at one point, too."

 

The young woman resident raised her head and glanced at the older doctor at that statement. "What?" Brian said, not missing the concerned look they shared. "What is it?"

 

The doctor told him, "We won't know until we run some tests, Mr. Kinney."

 

"But you _do_ suspect something, don't you?" he pressed. "Tell me – is it serious?"

 

"We're going to take some blood samples from your son to rule out some diagnoses. We won't know for sure what it is until we get something to go on. Why don't you give the nurse here your registration information in the meantime? How long ago, by the way, did you give him the Tylenol and how much?"

 

"About 30 minutes ago, I guess; I gave it to him as soon as we got into my car. It was one of those melt tabs."

 

The doctor nodded as the nurse wrote the additional information down. "I'll go get the blood work ordered right away," he told Brian; he started to walk out with Daphne close behind when Brian grabbed his forearm with his free hand.

 

"Doctor, I want to know what you think my son has."

 

The two doctors looked at each other for a few seconds before Broderick finally advised him sympathetically, "We'll need to run some tests to verify my suspicions; I'm sorry, Mr. Kinney, but it would be irresponsible for me to offer a definitive diagnosis until we do. Can you verify, though, if your son has had the mumps recently?"

 

Brian frowned; surely the doctor didn't think it was the mumps [- he had had those as a child and knew that disease was more of a nuisance than anything else. He didn't see Gus as regularly as he would like to, so he had no way of knowing whether his son had had the mumps or not. Neither Lindsay nor Melanie had mentioned that to him if he had. "Not that I know of, but I'm not sure. I can try and reach his mother to find out." He deliberately didn't mention the fact that Gus had _two_ mothers; it wasn't that he was trying to hide the fact – he didn't give a shit what these people thought about Gus' rather unorthodox parenting arrangement – but he was more concerned at the moment that Gus got the prompt treatment he needed and was afraid that divulging that unusual fact might just muddy up the waters more than necessary. There would be time to sort through the legal complications later.

 

Broderick nodded. "I think that would be a good idea – it would help us diagnosis his condition a little more definitively."

 

"I'll try to call them, then," Brian told the doctor, not savoring by any means the task but knowing he would do it nevertheless if it meant his son could receive the treatment he needed. He was still confused, however, about why the doctor needed to know if Gus had ever had the mumps or not. "Is he going to be all right, Doctor?" he asked a little fearfully.

 

The doctor stopped to peer into his eyes. "I hope so, Mr. Kinney. He's going to get the best treatment here, I can assure you." He looked over at the young patient intently before continuing. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to get that blood work ordered. I'll be back shortly. Dr. Chanders, I'd like you to stay with the patient to keep monitoring his vitals until I get back." The young woman nodded as she reached into her coat pocket and produced a thermometer similar to the one Brian had back home. Taking it and lightly sweeping it across Gus' forehead, she viewed the results and frowned.

 

"What is it?" Brian couldn't help asking.

 

She looked over at him grimly. "102.6," she announced.

 

Brian's eyes widened. "That's higher than the last time," he realized. "Why isn't it going down after I gave him some Tylenol?"

 

She shook her head. "Sometimes it takes a little while for the medicine to kick in," she told him. "We'll use some other supplementary methods to try and cool his body temperature down." Daphne turned to the nurse. "Would you get the registration information from Mr. Kinney and I'll get an orderly to bring a cooling pad in to try and lower his fever? We'll try a sponge bath, also – sometimes that helps as well," she advised Brian.

 

The nurse nodded in compliance as Daphne rushed out of the room in search of the needed item. "If I could please get some background history on your son and your demographic information," the woman asked somewhat apologetically as Brian silently nodded. As she began to ask him questions, he kept a tight grip on his son's hot hand as he gazed down at him. He had never felt so scared for his son as he did at that moment. _Please let him be all right_ , he silently pleaded. _Please…._

 

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"Justin!" Daphne called out as she recognized her friend coming out of the service elevator. She was relieved to run into him again – the emergency room was so busy at the moment that she was about ready to give up finding an orderly to help her, and she could think of no one better that she trusted around particularly vulnerable patients than her newly-acquired friend. "Could you help me out?" she asked.

 

Justin nodded; one rule he had learned quickly upon being hired as an orderly was that a doctor always outweighed a nurse in importance. Even if they didn't, he knew Daphne wouldn't ask for his help unless it was important. "Sure, Doctor," he said, reverting in public to her formal title. "What do you need?"

 

"Can you go get me a cooling pad from supplies? I also need a sponge and some lukewarm water."

 

"High fever?" he asked instantly, recognizing what she normally would need those items for.

 

She nodded. "Yeah – can you meet me in Room 7?"

 

"Sure," he told her with a smile. Just in the few months he had been here, he had performed quite a few sponge baths for young patients; he felt a sense of accomplishment whenever he was at least partly responsible in successfully getting their fever reduced. He knew that anything over 104 degrees could lead to some serious side effects, so he recognized the vital need to get their fever lowered right away before it got that high.

 

Rushing over to the nearby supplies closest, he retrieved the key hanging on a lanyard around his neck and quickly unlocked the room to retrieve the items he would need: A pan filled with lukewarm water out of the utility sink, a thick, soft sponge, a couple of large bath-size towels, and a box containing a cooling pad to be placed under the patient. He hurriedly walked out of the room at a brisk pace and headed down the short hallway toward the room Daphne had indicated.

 

Turning right to enter the room, he observed Daphne holding a young boy's wrist to check his pulse; a nurse he recognized as the head charge nurse for the emergency room department was hooking up equipment to monitor the child's oxygen levels through a finger device. The little body was currently nude from the waist up and was clad only in a pair of Spiderman briefs as he lay quiet and unresponsive. Justin could only tell he was alive by the shallow rising of the tiny chest while the little boy breathed in and out fitfully through his nose and the nurse watched over his oxygen level being displayed on a nearby machine.

 

A man, who was holding tightly onto the child's hand, looked up as he entered. Their gazes locked for a few seconds as Justin sized up the brunet . Even under the serious circumstances, he couldn't help noticing how incredibly handsome this man was – he was perfectly sculpted, from his slightly-tousled auburn hair, his long, lean, muscular frame toned to just the right amount of hardness, and on down to his long-fingered, elegant hands. The somewhat harsh lights from the overhead glare of the antiseptic fluorescent bulbs reflected off the hazel irises of his worried-looking eyes and gave them specks of gold. Though drawn and tired-looking, his face was strong and determined, with an angular jaw and full, cranberry-lips. Even with the look of concern on his face, Justin thought he was the most gorgeous specimen of man he had ever seen. At that moment, he was grateful that Daphne wasn't taking _his_ pulse because he didn't need an instrument or a doctor to know it was pounding furiously.

 

As the female resident took his son's pulse, Brian glanced up to see a young, blond male entering the room with the supplies that apparently were going to be used to try and lower Gus' temperature. Still holding onto his son's hand tightly, he couldn't help taking stock of how beautiful this young man was. He had hair the color of highly-polished gold, full, pink lips –especially the lower one – and the eyes; they were the most intriguing shade of sapphire blue he had ever seen. His eyelashes were long and lush as the man lowered his gaze in embarrassment over the intense stare Brian was giving him. As Brian's eyes lingered briefly over the slender frame, he thought of the saying that good things come in small packages, because he thought this man was perfectly proportioned from his slender, pale neck to his trim waist, his surprisingly large cock and all the way down his legs to his sneaker-clad feet. He could only imagine what the orderly's backside looked like; any other time, he would have found a convenience excuse to find out just what treasures were waiting on the other side of that delectable-looking man, but at the moment he was too worried about his son to find out.

 

"Mr. Kinney," Dr. Chanders told him. "This is Justin, one of our orderlies. He's going to put a cooling pad under your son and give him a sponge bath to try and lower his body temperature."

 

Brian nodded as he glanced down at his unresponsive son. His heart was in his throat as he gazed at the flushed, sweaty face. Gus hadn't shown any hint of movement since arriving at the hospital; he would feel so much more reassured if only he could speak to his son and tell him that everything would be okay.

 

"Excuse me," he heard a soft, baritone voice saying. He looked up to gaze into the pools of blue fastened to the beautiful blond orderly. "Could you lift your son up just a little so I can slide this pad under him?"

 

Justin gazed into those hazel eyes and was absolutely captivated by their ever-changing shades of green, brown and gold. The two stared at each other for a couple of seconds before Brian nodded silently and reached down to gently lift his son a few inches off the gurney so Justin could place the white, rectangular pad underneath his son. Nodding to him, Justin waited until Brian had gingerly laid his son back down on the surface before he reached into the plastic pan he had lying nearby and squeezed the water out of a large, brown sponge.

 

Brian watched in fascination as the blond brought the sponge over to his son and began to almost reverently brush it against the flushed, perspiration-soaked forehead. He observed him gently lift his son's left arm and lightly skim over the slim little wrist and hand before slowly, gingerly moving upward toward his son's shoulder and chest. The movements were deliberate and soothing, undoubtedly not only to Gus but to his own bruised and aching soul as well as he watched the careful, tender ministrations of this beautiful-looking stranger. His hands were so long-fingered and pale, almost like some alabaster doll, and he admired his long, silky eyelashes as the stranger concentrated on his important task. He was astounded by how loving and kind this other man's movements were toward his son as he watched him carefully and thoroughly wash over every uncomfortable, scorching part of his son's body.

 

Justin dipped the sponge several times in the lukewarm water to refresh the material before returning to his task, taking special care to address every part of the little boy's skin. He knew how important it was to get the patient's body temperature lowered as soon as possible and he couldn't stand the idea of this precious little child being subjected to something like that. He stole a look over at the father, who was still holding the little boy's hand firmly. It was obvious to him how much he loved his son. "What's his name?" he asked softly.

 

Brian raised his eyes to gaze into the sky-colored orbs and replied with a slightly choked-up voice, "Gus. His name's Gus."

 

Justin nodded with a slight smile. "He looks a lot like you," he decided. "How old is he?" he asked, staring at the adorable little face; in his current state, despite the chalky-looking pallor and the sweaty forehead, Gus looked like a little, fallen angel.

 

"Four," Brian whispered as he gazed down at his son. "He's four." He swallowed hard, anxiously waiting until the other doctor returned with the results of his son's blood work. He silently prayed that whatever the problem was, it was something that could be rectified soon. He couldn't even entertain the thought of something happening to his precious son who meant more to him than he ever thought possible. He realized at that moment that he could never be a replica of his shithole of a father – his love for his son was too pure and deep, the total antithesis of what his father has felt for him.

 

He looked up at the orderly as he heard the young resident tell him, "That's good, Justin. I'd better let you get going. Thanks."

 

Justin smiled at the female doctor and said, "You're welcome – glad I could help. Let me know if I can do anything else."

 

Daphne nodded at him gratefully; she was always so impressed with the care and special attention Justin paid to each and every young patient – she thought he would make a hell of a nurse, but she knew from previous conversations with him over their lunches that he had his heart set on being an artist. She couldn't deny that he was definitely talented from the few sketches Justin had given her the privilege of seeing – she thought, though, that the hospital was definitely going to be the loser when Justin eventually moved on to a full-time art career, but for now she would definitely take advantage of his compassion and his grace.

 

"I sure will – I'll see you later," she told him. Justin smiled slightly and nodded at Brian. "I hope your little boy gets better real soon," he said softly before quietly gathering up his pan and sponge and leaving.

 

Brian looked over in surprise as the orderly left; apparently these two were more than just co-workers at the hospital. Did they have some other type of closer relationship? He was normally a good judge of character and his sense of attraction toward another man was usually spot on when it came to whether the other person was gay or not, and when this amazing man walked into the room, he could have sworn his gaydar rang out loud and clear. Was it possible he had been wrong? He supposed it could certainly be true, because he was focused at the moment on his son. Any other time, he would have steadfastly set out to determine whether he was right or not; but right now, it was the last thing on his mind as he gazed back at the little boy lying so quiet and still.

 

"How long until we find out what's wrong with him?" he asked Daphne, never taking his eyes off his son as he spoke.

 

"It shouldn't be too long," she assured him. "I'm sure the doctor put a rush on the test results."

 

Brian finally looked over at her. "You have a good idea what it is, don't you?" he pressed her.

 

She looked a little uncomfortable at him for a few seconds before saying quietly, "Yes, we think we know what it is, and I would really like to tell you. But as Dr. Broderick said, it's not proper to give you a diagnosis until we're sure. I'm sorry – I hope you understand."

 

Brian sighed. "I don't like it, no, but I guess I realize why you can't tell me. But if anything happens to him….." He couldn't complete the statement – the alternative was just too much to bear.

 

His eyes darted to the door as the other doctor rushed in holding a clipboard with some paperwork attached. He looked at Daphne and nodded. "We just got the test results back, Mr. Kinney. I know what your son is suffering from now." He flipped up the cover page to reread the blood test results to make sure once more that he was correct – there was no mistake.

 

Brian held his breath as the doctor looked at him intently, unflinching. "Mr. Kinney…..Your son has meningitis."

 


	3. Life and Death Struggle

Brian's heart felt like it stopped beating for a couple of seconds. _Meningitis_. He had heard of it before, but what he knew about it would fit on the tip of his finger. By the somber looks he was receiving from everyone in his son's room, however, he knew it couldn't be good. "Meningitis?" he asked finally. "What does that mean?"

 

"Let's go sit down and I can explain it to you in more detail," the older man told him authoritatively. "The nurse will stay with your son," he assured Brian, who looked down at his eerily-still child. He didn't want to leave him, but he needed to know what they were up against. "Just for a few minutes," he finally agreed, turning to follow the two doctors out of the room; Dr. Broderick walked him directly across the hall to a door marked "Conference" and opened it to usher Daphne and him into a small room furnished with two long, slate-blue cloth benches and a couple of matching chairs. Brian sat down on the edge of one of the benches to face the two doctors who took their places in the chairs and peered over at them anxiously.

 

Dr. Broderick glanced down at the clipboard to verify the information listed there was correct before he began. "Your son's spinal tap results we had done in addition to his blood work definitely confirm he has bacterial meningitis; that is an inflammation surrounding the membranes of the brain and spinal cord; it's caused by exposure to an infection. I had suspected your son's diagnosis earlier but needed to make sure. We will need to take aggressive action immediately."

 

Brian licked his lips nervously; this sounded bad – very bad. "It's serious, then."

 

The doctor glanced over at Daphne, who had her lips pursed together tightly, before he peered back at Brian and nodded. "Yes, I won't lie to you, Mr. Kinney. We were hoping the results might have indicated he had the less serious type – viral meningitis; but the tests proved otherwise."

 

Brian took a deep breath; he didn't want to ask but he had to know. "Could…..could this be _fatal_?" he whispered; the last word felt like a needle piercing his heart as he said it aloud. _Gus…..serious…fatal._

 

"Mr. Kinney….."

 

"Doctor, I have to know," he insisted, his voice catching.

 

The doctor let out a soft breath. "Yes," he answered. "In some cases death can result. But," he hastened to add as he noticed the other man's face contorting in pain, "it seems to have been caught in its early stage, and that always ups the odds in the patient's favor."

 

Brian's hands curled into a tight fist in his lap, the nails of his fingers painfully piercing his palms, but in his current emotional state he didn't even feel it. "What kind of odds are we talking about?" he whispered.

 

"With early detection and quick initiation of antibiotics, which we will start your son on right away, it lowers the chances of mortality to less than 15%."

 

Brian thought he should be at least grateful for that much, for it still didn't fill him with reassurance. "You say the disease should respond to antibiotics?"

 

The doctor nodded. "Yes, we will treat him immediately with antibiotics in an attempt to prevent it from spreading to other parts of his body, including his bloodstream."

 

"What would happen then?" Brian asked, his voice barely audible. He didn't miss the sideways glance the doctor gave the younger female resident.

 

"Well, that could result in more serious consequences," the doctor told him vaguely. "Mr. Kinney, we seem to have detected it early, which is a definite advantage. In addition to the antibiotics, we'll continue the acetaminophen to reduce his fever, and begin an IV to provide fluids to help prevent dehydration. We'll have to watch your son closely for the next 48 hours to monitor his progress and just hope for the best. Your son isn't contagious through casual contact, so you're welcome to stay with him as much as you like."

 

Brian nodded. "I'm not going anywhere," he vowed. He realized, however, that he could no longer put off calling Lindsay or Mel; they had to know what was going on immediately. "I just need to call his mothers."

 

The doctor stood up to go, not catching the plural use of the word _mothers_. "I'd better get this protocol started immediately, then," he told Brian. "Dr. Chanders, would you stay with Mr. Kinney's son until I can get all the procedures in place? I want Gus kept in the ICU so he can be closely watched and a nurse with him at all times."

 

"Yes, Doctor," the young woman told him nodding. She turned to study Brian, whose shoulders were stooped in worry. "Mr. Kinney, I'll stay with your son until you can make your call," she assured him. "You can stay here for some privacy if you want," she offered helpfully.

 

He nodded gratefully at her. "Thanks," he said softly. "I'll be over as soon as I take care of this." He watched the petite woman walk over to open the door and quietly close it behind her, leaving him in silence for the first time in hours.

 

He rubbed his hand through his hair as he stared at the phone in his lap and tried to collect his thoughts for a few seconds; the past several hours seemed so surreal. Taking a deep breath at last, he flipped it open to press a one-digit code and hold the phone up to his ear as he waited for it to ring. "Lindsay?" he said as his friend answered the phone after a couple of rings; as he looked at the phone's display, he realized with a start that it was almost 3:00 a.m.

 

"Brian?" he heard her respond groggily. "Is that you?"

 

"Yeah, Lindsay, it's me." He could hear Melanie in the background accusing him of calling them in some drunken, post-Babylon stupor, but for once he refused to rise to the bait; his son was the focus of why he was calling, and they didn't have time for petty differences. "I need to talk to you." There was no easy way to say this, so he simply plowed forward. "It's about Gus."

 

Instantly he could hear the sleepiness disappearing from Lindsay's voice to be replaced by worry. "Gus? What about him?" He could hear Mel in the background once more asking what was going on, and the sound of what appeared to be Lindsay hushing her so she could hear. "Brian?"

 

The brunet sighed. "You need to come home. He's at the Children's Hospital. He's just been diagnosed with bacterial meningitis and is in the ICU."

 

He heard Lindsay gasp and her muffled voice undoubtedly speaking to Mel as she quickly came back onto the phone. "Meningitis? How did this happen? He seemed fine when we left."

 

_Don't even go there_ , Brian thought with disgust. If either Lindsay or Mel even hinted at him doing something wrong where his son was concerned, they could _both_ go to hell. "I don't know," he tried to answer as honestly as he could. "He and I were having pizza and watching movies last night, and he was fine when we went to bed. He woke me back up around midnight with a fever, neck ache and vomiting. I gave him some Tylenol and rushed him here to the hospital where they did some tests and found out that's what he has."

 

"Are you sure that's how it happened?" he suddenly heard Mel say into the phone; obviously both women were listening now.

 

Brian was in no mood for the woman's accusatory tone. "Yes, I'm sure," he said defensively. "If you don't believe me, you can just fuck off! I didn't do a damn thing to him! You honestly think I don't know how to take care of my own son? Shit!" he muttered in disbelief. "I can't believe you! Just get up here, okay? There's no time for this bullshit! This is fucking serious!"

 

He could hear Lindsay trying desperately to calm her partner down before she said, "We'll be on the next flight out, Brian. Just how serious is it?"

 

Brian took a deep breath and let it out, not relishing wanting to repeat what the doctor had said but knowing he must. "Lindsay…..it could, it could possibly be…the doctor's said there's a 15% chance that he could…..just hurry, okay?" That was all he could manage to utter without choking up. He couldn't believe they were talking about Gus. He desperately hoped this was all just some bad, horrible dream, but he knew it wasn't.

 

"Oh, my God!" she cried out as she turned to Mel in agony, anguish written all over her face as she went pale. She turned back to the phone just long enough to say, "We're on our way," and get Brian's assurance that he would give Gus their love before she abruptly disconnected the phone to start making immediate plans to return home.

 

Brian closed his eyes as the weariness and worry threatened to overtake him; he had never felt as alone as he did at that moment as he placed his hands on his thighs and tried to gather his strength; finally, he slowly rose once more to his feet and walked over to the door to return to his son's room. He knew it was going to be a long 48 hours, but he was prepared to remain at his son's bedside until he got better, and his son _would_ recover. He refused to consider any other possibility.

 

As he returned, he noticed the young female doctor standing next to his son's bedside; the constant beep-beep-beep of the heart monitor dominated the room. While the need for it terrified him, the regular rhythm of the machine also reassured him that his son's heart was beating steadily.

 

"How is he?" he whispered to Daphne as he quietly walked in. He looked at his son who seemed so small and frail lying there. He had been transferred from the gurney now to a regular hospital bed which made him appear even tinier than he had before; his small, lanky body was practically dwarfed by the mattress.

 

"His temperature has gone down just a bit," she reported softly as Brian came to stand by the bed rail and take his son's sweaty hand. He felt comforted somewhat by the familiar touch of his child's miniature, perfect little hand but it felt warmer than it should, no doubt due to his fever.

 

"What is it?" he asked, glancing over at the young woman.

 

Last time it was checked about ten minutes ago it was at 101.8," she told him. "I know it's a small difference," she acknowledged, "but at least it _is_ a decrease; that's good. And they've started his antibiotics and IV; all of that should help him fight off the disease. They'll also keep the lights dimmed in his room, because bright light can bother a patient while they're recovering."

 

"But will it be enough?" Brian wondered, staring down at Gus' face, so seemingly worry-free in his unconscious state. "Why isn't he awake?" he asked.

 

"The meningitis makes you lethargic along with the fever," she told him. "Once the fever goes down and the antibiotics start to take effect, we're hopeful he'll start responding to them and wake up."

 

"You're _hopeful?_ " he repeated.

 

She turned to stare into Brian's eyes. "No one can predict what will happen 100 percent of the time, Mr. Kinney," she told him regretfully. "But I think you brought him in while he was in the early stages of it, so that definitely gives him an advantage. We just have to hope that he'll recover without any lasting side effects."

 

Brian frowned; he had been so worried about Gus even surviving the initial illness that he hadn't even considered if there might be any residual effects from it. "What do you mean?" he asked. "What kind of side effects?"

 

Daphne hesitated; torn between wanting to be straightforward with Brian and not wanting to unnecessarily alarm him. "Well, sometimes when the patient recovers there are still issues that need to be dealt with."

 

"Doctor…..Just be fucking straight with me, okay?" he asked just a little more curtly than he had intended; he was tired, though, of everyone dodging his questions. "What sort of issues?"

 

She sighed. "Okay…depending upon their recovery time, the severity of the disease itself and other factors, sometimes the patient can suffer afterward from other problems such as brain damage, hearing loss, or learning disabilities."

 

Brian's face went white at her disclosure. "My God….."

 

"But that is in the most severe cases," she hastened to add, noticing Brian's reaction. "Your son's case was caught early. Hopefully none of that will happen."

 

Brian's eyes glistened as he bit his lip and stared at his beautiful, sweet son, the child he never envisioned he would ever have but now couldn't imagine ever being without. Even if Gus survived, would he still be the same boisterous, full-of-life child he had always been? Would he still run around his loft at breakneck speed, giggling as his father caught up with him and threw him on his shoulders for a ride? Would he still hug his neck at night and whisper to him, "I love you, Daddy?" and cause his heart to explode with joy and love for him like it always did?

 

He held on even tighter to the listless hand as he leaned over and gave his son a kiss on his sweat-soaked forehead. "Daddy's here, Sonny Boy," he whispered. "You're going to be just fine, Buddy. You hear me? You need to get all better so I can take you to the circus and the zoo like we planned, okay?" He reached over with his free hand and gently wiped the hair back from his son's bangs, silently beseeching his son to wake up, but he remained still and silent like a sleeping, cherubic statue.

 

Despite having a relative stranger standing next to him, he couldn't help adding softly, "I love you, Gus. Daddy loves you so much." At the moment, he didn't care who heard him – it was the truth. He loved this child more than life itself, and if love was enough to heal him he knew he could recover fully from this horrible disease.

 

He and Daphne both glanced up as they heard someone entering the room and saw Dr. Broderick returning, along with the nurse who had first brought Gus back into the room. The doctor nodded over toward the older blond woman and told Brian, "This is the charge nurse, Carol Watson. She'll be in charge of watching over your son for the night until shift change. She'll be checking his vitals regularly and seeing that his IV is changed as needed and the antibiotics are administered properly. I have to do some rounds, but I will be on call if something comes up. There's also an ER doctor here in case of any emergency."

 

Brian nodded, glad that a nurse would be constantly available for his son; it reassured him but also frightened him, because if the doctor felt around-the-clock care was needed, his son was, indeed, in a very serious situation. "Thank you, Doctor," he told the man as he nodded over at the nurse, who smiled slightly in acknowledgement.

 

"I assume you'll be staying with your son?"

 

Brian nodded. "Yeah…I did reach his mother – she's on her way up here – she's out of state currently." He suddenly realized something. "I forgot to ask her about the mumps," he said.

 

The doctor shook his head. "That's okay – it's unnecessary now that we have a definitive diagnosis." He turned toward the nurse. "I'll have Carol get an orderly to bring in a chair that converts into a small bed so you can stay with your son, and some extra pillows and blankets."

 

Carol nodded toward Brian. "I'll take care of it," she said, turning to leave. "I'll be right back," she promised Brian before she left.

 

"Dr. Chanders and I have to resume our rounds," he told Brian. "I'll be here immediately if the need warrants. For now, we're doing all we can for your son. The next 48 hours are critical – the rest is up to him."

 

Brian nodded, swallowing the hard lump in his throat. "He's a hardy little boy," he whispered in a choked voice. "He's going to pull through this."

 

The doctor nodded. "That's good that's he's a fighter," he said, smiling slightly. "If you'll excuse me, I'll be back later."

 

Brian watched both doctors go as he turned around once more to stare at his son. He pulled the half-draped, white hospital-issue cotton blanket back from his son's chest and pulled the lightweight hospital gown together to close it. He didn't know with his son's fever whether to keep him covered or not, but it made sense to him that if his temperature was elevated, it was best to keep him cool.

 

Speaking of which, he noticed the cooling blanket still under his son's slight body; he felt the pad and noticed it wasn't very damp anymore. Irritated that it hadn't been changed yet, he vowed to get a new one as soon as the nurse returned.

 

He heard the door banging slightly as it swung open once more and he looked to observe the same, blond-haired orderly as before dragging a beige-colored, vinyl chair into the room, along with a pillow and blanket. He also had some sort of plastic bag on top of the bedding, which was lying in the chair's seat.

 

Justin had planned on leaving right after 2 a.m. when his co-worker's shift was scheduled to be over, but he had found himself worrying about the adorable, brown-haired boy who had been brought in and was so seriously ill down in the ER that he had decided to stick around at least long enough to find out how he was. He had run into the charge nurse near the supply room a few minutes ago and in the course of asking about the little boy, he had found out the father needed some items brought to the room. He had volunteered for his final activity of the night to bring the chair, bedding, and a replacement cooling pad to Gus' room – something for which the short-staffed nurse had readily agreed to.

 

As he entered the room, he saw Gus' father standing over his son's bed, his hand clutching the little boy's. The man turned as he came in and Justin noticed how tired and drawn he looked. Still, Justin decided he was the most gorgeous man he had ever seen, and his pulse couldn't help speeding up a bit as a result. He suddenly found himself feeling downright shy in the sight of such a handsome man and fought to keep from blushing as the man stared back at him curiously.

 

"I….I brought a convertible chair for you to sleep in," he explained to Brian, even though he thought that was rather obvious. "I'll put it next to the bed."

 

Brian recognized the orderly instantly as the same one that had given his son a sponge bath so tenderly before and had provided a cooling pad to help lower his son's fever. "That's fine," he told Justin rather absentmindedly, still worried for his son's health. Even in such dire circumstances, though, he still couldn't help noticing the other man's perfectly-proportioned features, from his mop of somewhat unruly hair, to his long, lush eyelashes, button nose, full lips, and slim body that was curved but also trim in all the right places. Any other time, he would have been fascinated by this other man and would have pursued him doggedly. At the moment, though, all he could do was focus on his son.

 

He didn't even notice the orderly had remained in the room until he heard a soft voice saying, "I brought a new cooling pad for him. I thought it might need to be replaced."

 

Brian turned to stare into the intense blue eyes of the man now standing near him. He was even more beautiful up close, he decided, impressed that this man had been thoughtful enough to think of bringing in a new pad for his son without being asked. "Thanks," he told Justin softly. "I'll lift him up again if you can slide it under him."

 

Justin nodded, fascinated by the way the man's lips moved and the hazel eyes that were so unique – they seemed to change shades at a moment's notice and left him constantly guessing just what color they were. He waited until Brian had grasped his son's body and lifted him up slightly before he slid the drying pad out from underneath and smoothly replaced it with a fresh one.

 

He watched, fascinated, as the man gently lowered his son back to the mattress before he straightened out his son's hospital gown and once more grasped Gus' hand as he sat down now on the chair that Justin had retrieved.

 

"Is there anything else I can get you?" he asked the brunet, kind of hoping that there was so he would have an excuse to stay.

 

Brian sighed as he stared into his son's face. "How about a full recovery for my son?" he asked softly, never taking his gaze away from Gus.

 

"I wish I could," Justin replied sincerely. "But I'll certainly be hoping for one for him." Brian simply nodded silently before Justin advised him, "My shift's over for tonight so I'll be leaving. I'll be back tomorrow and I'll make sure to check on him then."

 

Brian turned his gaze away from his son to acknowledge what Justin had said. "I'll be here," he told Justin. "I'm not going anywhere."

 

Justin nodded, impressed with the other man's devotion. "Good night, then."

 

Brian nodded. "Good night; thanks," he added softly as an afterthought.

 

The side of Justin's mouth twisted up sympathetically as he smiled slightly and said, "You're welcome," before he somewhat reluctantly turned and left the room.

 

Fifteen minutes later, he was once more dressed in his old, familiar Chinos and a comfortable, sky-blue colored tee shirt and was about to head toward the employee's exit door when he spotted someone familiar walking out of a nearby women's restroom. "Daphne!" he called out softly, using her first name in the relatively empty hallway.

 

His friend turned and smiled at him in recognition. "Hey, Justin! You're still here?" she asked as she walked up to him.

 

He nodded. "I was just leaving," he verified. "I wanted to stick around to see how the new admission was doing – Gus. How is he – really?" he asked, anxious to hear his friend's opinion.

 

"Well, his fever has gone down a little since he was brought in," she reported as she placed one hand on the small of her back and blew out some air through her lips in tiredness. "And it appears his father brought him in as soon as he realized there was a problem." She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, Justin…..I'm hoping he's going to recover completely, but with meningitis you never know. It's a real quirky disease. It's really more of a wait-and-see game. Even with the IV fluids and antibiotics, you never really know how it's going to turn out. I've seen it go both ways."

 

Justin bit his lip, sorry to hear that she didn't have a more definite prognosis. "When do you think you'll know for sure if he's out of the woods or not?"

 

She cocked her head and raised an eyebrow. "Probably at least not for another 48 hours or so…depends upon how well he responds to treatment."

 

Justin sighed. "I hope he'll be all right – he's a beautiful little boy." _And the father's pretty damn incredible, too_ , he couldn't help thinking, but he knew practically nothing about Brian Kinney. He was just being downright ridiculous even thinking that way and besides, the man had much more important matters on his mind right now. He had found it interesting, though, that there didn't seem to be a mother in the picture.

 

"Yeah – me, too," Daphne told him. "Well, you go get some sleep for both of us, okay?" she joked. "I'm here until six again."

 

Justin shook his head. "I still don't know how you do it," he told her. "How do they expect you to even keep your eyes open, much less actually treat a patient?" He smiled at her. "Remind me never to get sick and require overnight hospitalization, okay?"

 

She grinned. "I'll do my best." She glanced at her watch. "Dr. Broderick's probably looking for me by now – I'd better get going. Are we still on for pizza later?"

 

"I'm _always_ on for that," Justin told her, smiling. "You know me."

 

She laughed. "Yeah," she agreed. "Silly question. I'll meet you at Roberto's later, then."

 

"Okay," Justin told her as she turned to go. "You'll check in on the little boy later?"

 

She twisted her mouth fondly at her new friend, who was always getting so wrapped up in the patient's welfare. She knew how hard it was to separate your feelings here, especially when children were involved, but she had slowly been able to do it for the sake of maintaining her detached professionalism. She suspected, however, that Justin would never be able to do it, though, at least not completely – he was just too compassionate and wore his heart on his sleeve too much. "Yeah, I will," she promised, just before she turned and rushed away.

 

As Justin headed out the door into the unexpectedly chilly, cloudless night, his thoughts were preoccupied by a vulnerable, helpless little boy down in the ICU and the boy's father who was standing such watchful vigil over him. _Please let him be okay_ , Justin thought, as he walked toward the bus stop to wait for his ride home.

 


	4. The Mothers Arrive

_5:00 a.m. – Gus's Room_

 

"Mr. Kinney?" Brian came awake with a start as he lifted his head from the side of his son's hospital bed; he hadn't even realized he had fallen asleep for a few minutes until someone had called his name, and the knowledge of that fact filled him with guilt that he might have neglected his son. He immediately gazed over at his child, his heart yearning to see hopes of a change in his condition, but Gus remained as still as before. He thought perhaps his son's color looked a little more normal, but in the dim lighting they were maintaining in his room he couldn't be sure. His son was now wearing a paper mask over his mouth and nose - a precautionary measure to help keep his disease from spreading.

 

He turned to see who had called out to him, and noticed an unfamiliar, gray-haired nurse standing just inside the door, a clipboard in her hand as she glanced down at some information in his son's chart.

 

"Yes?" he asked.

 

"I need to examine your son and record some information," she said politely.

 

"Go ahead," Brian told her. "But I'm staying right here."

 

She seemed to hesitate for a moment as she sized up the tired-looking but handsome man's determined face before deciding he wasn't going to budge. Walking over to the other side of the patient's bed, she nodded at Brian curtly before leafing through some paperwork again.

 

Brian waited a few seconds before he couldn't stand it any longer. "Has there been any change?" he asked somewhat impatiently; this nurse's businesslike demeanor made him bristle somewhat. It was almost as if she were examining a piece of meat rather than a small, seriously ill child.

 

To her credit, though, the nurse seemed to soften a little as she realized how brusque she was appearing. Cathy McDonald had been a nurse here at the Children's Hospital for almost 25 years now, and in that time had seen her share of heartache and tragedy; being detached from it was sometimes the only way she could cope with the pain. But as she looked into the worried eyes of this child's father, she could tell his love for the little boy ran deep and it made her realize how she might have sounded.

 

She looked directly then into Brian's eyes as she replied softly, "The last temperature recorded for him was down a little bit more from the previous reading – it's under 100 now – 99.8. That's somewhat encouraging," she told him. "And his condition hasn't worsened. Sometimes that alone is a good sign when it comes to meningitis." She studied the man's face sympathetically, noticing he seemed to relax slightly at her words. "This disease takes some time to recover from, Mr. Kinney. But it would be best for the doctor to speak to you about that." She took one more look at the clipboard. "The doctor did ask you about where your son went to school, didn't he? It's important that anyone he's been in contact with be made aware of his condition so any others that were exposed can be protected and treated if necessary."

 

Brian nodded. "Yes – he's already notified my son's daycare. And I've given him as much information that I can about his contacts lately."

 

She glanced over at the sleeping boy. "I'd say he's holding his own, Mr. Kinney, but like I said, the doctor should be in soon and can answer any specific questions you might have." She reached over to straighten up Gus' slight body in the bed; during the night he had managed to slide somewhat off the pillow. She reached up to replace the IV drip with a fresh bag and checked the port for his wrist before gently placing his tiny hand back down onto the bed. "Anything I can get you until then, Mr. Kinney?"

 

Brian shook his head, trying to clear the grogginess from his brain; he had slept perhaps a total of an hour in the past twenty-four hours and was exhausted. He wasn't leaving his son's bed, however, until he knew he was going to be all right. Mel and Lindsay would undoubtedly be here any time; that might perhaps give him a chance to at least grab a quick shower and a change of clothes. Until then, however, he was going to remain planted by his son's side.

 

"Only my son's health," he finally answered her, gazing over at his son and reaching out to tenderly wipe some of Gus' hair back from his forehead. He did notice that his son did not appear to be sweating as much as he had been last night, and he did believe his color was better. He held desperately onto those two facts as he silently willed his son to get better.

 

The woman studied the weary, slightly stooped form of the larger carbon copy of her patient before saying, "We'll do the best we can, Mr. Kinney. If you or your son needs anything, just page the nurses' station, okay? The doctor will be in shortly."

 

Brian nodded silently as the woman quietly walked out, leaving him alone once more with his thoughts as he gazed at his son. He leaned over the bed and reached through the metal bars of the railing to clasp his son's hand; it was soft and warm – a little too warm. But at least it felt a little cooler than before. "Daddy's right here, Sonny Boy." He cleared his throat and sniffled before continuing. "You have to get better soon, Gus. Your old man's planning on taking you to a ball game. And we'll get there early so you can get all kinds of autographs. I've even got a new Pirates hat for you, Buddy. And a jersey. You get all better and I'll let you eat all the hot dogs there that you want." _Even if it IS with mayonnaise and mustard on it._ Brian had always thought that was an extremely odd combination of condiments to put on a hot dog, but right now he he couldn't think of anything more appetizing...

 

He swallowed the painful lump in his throat before he could continue. "But Daddy has to get you out of here first. That means you have to work on getting better, okay? You have to work hard and do whatever the doctor tells you so we can get go to the ballgame. Do you hear me, Gus?" He asked softly. "Can't you wake up for Daddy…..please?" He angrily wiped a stray tear from his eye with the sleeve of his shirt, disgusted with his show of weakness; he knew crying wouldn't help his son get better. _Please, Buddy…..wake up…..Please….._

 

"Brian!" He quickly wiped his eye one more time before he turned as he heard Lindsay's voice from the hallway. She rushed in with Mel quickly on her heels to walk over to the opposite side of their son's bed. "My God," she whispered, as she noticed her son's flushed, sweaty face, the machine keeping watch over his vital signs and the IV fluids being pumped into him. "Gus," she whispered. "It's Mommy and Mama – we're here, baby. Can you hear us?" She reached over to brush her hand against his cheek, noticing how warm his skin was. "How is he? Has there been any change?" she asked Brian softly as she continued to gaze at her son.

 

"The nurse was just in," he whispered. "She told me his fever is finally under a hundred, but other than that there really hasn't been much change. But she did say his hasn't gotten any worse, so I guess that's something."

 

"Where's the doctor?" Mel asked curtly. "Our son is seriously ill and he's out doing rounds?"

 

Brian sighed. "The nurse was just here and has been in and out frequently; the doctor is supposed to be here any minute, and there's an ER doctor on the floor just in case."

 

The brunette woman huffed. "Well, I'm going to go find out where he is – I want to know what's going on." She turned abruptly to rush out of the room to search for the physician, leaving Lindsay and Brian alone.

 

The blonde raised her eyes to peer into her friend's, noticing the haunted, tired look in his eyes. "You look like hell…have you had any sleep since you brought him in last night?"

 

"What do you _think_?" he snapped just a little too harshly. "How can I sleep when our son could die?" His voice cracked on the last word; somehow saying it out loud seemed to make it that much more real; before it had remained just under the surface, out of the realm of possibility, but he had to face facts. Their son had an illness that could be fatal – this wasn't a game or some soap opera – this was the real, horrible deal.

 

Lindsay didn't take offense at her friend's tone; she knew how much he had to be hurting over Gus' condition. Despite her initial skepticism over how involved Brian would want to be with his son once he had been born, he had surprised her by the depth of his feelings for their little boy and his love for him. He had become a surprisingly tender and caring father in his own warped way, and had even taken an active role in making sure they saw each other regularly. He and Gus had a standing date every other weekend to do something, whether it was playing at the nearby park, going to the pizza place, or taking in a ball game. Gus had repaid his father's love and attention by worshiping the ground his father walked on. To Gus, Brian could do no wrong – he was larger than life and a wonderful father. She instinctively knew, then, that he couldn't have had anything to do with the life or death situation their son was currently battling.

 

"How does the doctor think he got this?" she asked curiously, as she reached over to take her son's other hand in hers. "I don't understand. He seemed fine when we left yesterday."

 

Brian gazed into their son's angelic-looking face; his dark eyelashes were draped over his closed eyes and through the mask you could see small puffs of breath going in and out; his gaze roamed downward to watch the tiny chest rise and fall rhythmically. His own heart beat in anxiety at each beep of the machine; would it continue to register their son's regular breathing? Of would there come a time soon when his breathing would become labored and erratic? He forced that thought out of his mind as he looked over at Lindsay and answered, "He was okay with me until we went to bed, and it was like a fucking light turned off or something; he woke me up around midnight complaining that he felt sick to his stomach and his neck hurt. The next minute I had him in the bathroom and he threw up. It all happened so fast, Lindsay," he whispered painfully. "So fucking fast." He stared into her eyes. "I didn't do anything – you know I would never do anything to hurt him."

 

She nodded. "I know you wouldn't," she assured him. "We did a little research on meningitis on the way up here. I know you didn't have anything to do with it, Brian, and so does Mel."

 

"But you still had to check to make sure?" he growled in disbelief.

 

"No, I didn't mean that!" she assured him. "We were just trying to understand what he's up against, that's all."

 

Brian huffed softly, only partly mollified. "Well, I'm sure if she could have blamed me, she would have, though."

 

"Brian…..Let's not go down that route right now, okay? It's not important right now." She knew that Brian and her partner would never see eye to eye over anything, but for now they needed to band together for Gus' sake.

 

Brian looked over at their son and finally nodded. "I agree….he's what's most important. We need to focus on that."

 

The constant beeping of the monitor was the only sound heard for several seconds as Lindsay gazed at her son's still form and felt her eyes glistening with tears. "Brian…if anything happens to him…"

 

The brunet's eyes flashed with irritation. "Don't go there, Lindsay! He's going to be fine, do you hear me?" His friend remained silent, except for a couple of sniffles. "Do you hear me, Lindsay?" he repeated more firmly. He was not even going to contemplate the alternative; life without his son was not an option any more.

 

She lifted her gaze to stare into her friend's determined eyes. "Yes," she finally whispered, nodding, as she reached up to wipe some tears from her cheek. She knew Brian was right – they had to remain positive and hopeful that everything would turn out all right. But inside her heart was aching with worry for their son.

 

Their attention was drawn to the door as Mel returned. She had made good on her vow and had the same doctor as last night following her into the room. "Doctor, this is my partner, Lindsay Peterson. We're Gus' parents."

 

The older doctor lifted an eyebrow momentarily at the unusual parenting arrangement but in his twenty-plus years as an infectious disease specialist he had run into all sorts of situations so this one barely rated a short register of surprise; besides, the small boy who was gravely ill and lying in the nearby hospital bed was of the most concern to him at the moment. "My name is Dr. Broderick," he told Lindsay, nodding politely as he peered out from under his wire-rimmed glasses. "Mr. Kinney and I met last night when he brought his son in."

 

She and Brian nodded in acknowledgment as Mel came over to sit next to her and take her free hand to offer comfort and support; she gratefully grasped it tightly as they looked expectantly at the middle-aged doctor.

 

The doctor flipped the metal chart holder open and leafed through several pieces of paper representing Gus' diagnostic results and hourly vitals. He quickly scanned over several lines before he closed it softly and glanced up into three pairs of worried eyes peering back at him anxiously.

 

"Well, he hasn't deteriorated since he was brought in," the doctor told them. "His fever has decreased slightly and he continues to breathe on his own without any labor. We administered a dose of Dexamethasone to your son prior to beginning his antibiotic regimen to lessen any ill effects the medication may have on his system."

 

"Dexamethasone…?"

 

The doctor nodded. "Yes – it's a corticosteroid – there's been evidence that usage of it can help decrease the odds of mortality as well as deafness in children with Gus' type of meningitis; it has to be administered, though, prior to the antibiotics, which were started immediately after getting your son's test results back. We will continue with the corticosteroid for the next few days; the antibiotics likely will be needed for at least two weeks through an IV drip."

 

"Wait a minute, doctor," Brian said, confused. "You said deafness? What the fuck are you talking about?"

 

The doctor let out a breath before speaking, never relishing having to deliver the somewhat disturbing news about the residual effects of this disease. "In some severe cases of bacterial meningitis, the patient can develop partial deafness as a result of the disease. There is also the possibility of epileptic convulsions and some development difficulties such as cognitive or motor skill deficits. Blindness can also be a result."

 

The two women gasped as Brian's heart dropped in alarm. _Blindness…..deafness…cognitive difficulties…convulsions….._ "How…..how likely is that, Doctor?" he whispered just barely loud enough to be heard. He couldn't believe this was his son they were talking about; his normally effervescent, devil-may-care son who was presently lying so still and weak.

 

"Some hearing loss normally occurs in about half of all children's cases; blindness about 10 percent of the time. The other aftereffects are a little less likely. The fact that you brought your son in as soon as you noticed the symptoms is a very promising sign as well. The earlier treatment begins, the better a patient's chances are. All of that are pluses in your son's favor."

 

"My God," Melanie murmured as she squeezed Lindsay's hand tighter. "Gus…." She whispered, her voice choked with emotion as she glanced over at their little boy. "Is there anything else that can be done for him, Doctor? Any specialists we can bring in?"

 

"I'll pay for any treatment Gus needs," Brian immediately told him.

 

The doctor shook his head. "Believe me – he will be getting state-of-the-art care here; I am putting my associate, Dr. Chanders, in charge of the case when I am not around to make sure she is providing me with hour-by-hour updates. He will be getting around-the-clock care, I can assure you." He glanced over at Gus' vitals being displayed on the monitor before adding, "You will all need to be administered a one-dose antibiotic, also, as a strictly precautionary measure. And anyone else who may have had intimate contact with him as far as sharing utensils, bedding, or any other type of close contact will need it as well. Casual contact is normally not a risk factor for getting it. We have already notified your son's daycare school, but they have not indicated any other child has contracted the disease, so as of now we're at a loss as to who he contracted it from."

 

He glanced over at the two women to assure them, "Mr. Kinney did everything right with your little boy, Ladies. If he hadn't brought Gus in so quickly, the end result could have been a lot worse. A lot of parents initially mistake the symptoms for flu instead of acting upon them. He gave your son Acetaminophen and rushed him here. It probably saved his life, but time will tell."

 

He glanced at the clock over Gus' bed. "I have to go make some rounds. I will have my beeper with me if anything urgent comes up; in the meantime, my associate, Dr. Chanders, will be here soon. And the ICU nurse is on stand-by right across the hall at the nurses' station. Your son will be in good hands, trust me." He nodded at them politely. "I'll be back in later to check on him," he added before turning to rush out of the room, again bathing the space in silence except for the regular beeping of the monitoring machine near the bed.

 

Brian let out a worried breath as the doctor left; he had no idea their son could overcome his initial illness, only to possibly be subjected to such disastrous and life-altering after effects. He gazed down at his perfect, sweet little boy who was normally such a bundle of energy and he almost found it hard to accept it was actually his son. He bit his lip, determined not to begin bawling at the thought of what might happen to his little boy, but he was finding it extremely difficult to keep up his brave front in light of such sobering news.

 

"Brian," he heard Mel calling him softly from across the bed. He slowly raised his eyes to look into her's and Lindsay's as the woman said, "I…..I want to thank you for getting Gus here so quickly." She couldn't believe she was having to thank Brian for anything regarding their son, but she had to grudgingly admit – his prompt action probably did save their son's life, or at least provide him with a fighting chance. "We're grateful that you acted so fast and got him here so quickly."

 

Brian merely nodded; he couldn't spare much time worrying about what Melanie thought of him or his motives. He continued to hold onto Gus' hot hand as he slowly caressed the soft flesh with his thumb and silently encouraged his son to wake up. _Please, Sonny Boy…..I need you…..I love you…._

 

"Brian?" Lindsay whispered to him. "We'll stay with Gus. Why don't you go crash somewher

e at least for a little while and try to get some sleep? You know we'll call you if anything happens."

 

Brian shook his head, stubbornly refusing to leave his son's bedside. The truth was, though, he _was_ thoroughly exhausted and dead on his feet. He could barely hold his eyes open and probably stunk to high heaven as well. He dearly craved a shower at least to help ward off the tiredness.

 

"Brian – please; you won't be any good to Gus if you can't stay awake. I promise – we'll call you the second anything happens, I promise."

 

Brian was torn between not wanting to leave his son and needing desperately to lie down, at least for a little while. "I…..I can't, Lindsay," he whispered finally. "What if something happens and I can't get back here before he, he…" He couldn't complete the sentence; the thought was just too painful to even contemplate. No, his son was going to be okay – he had gotten him here on time. And he was going to be fine…just fine. But he just couldn't leave him, not until he knew for sure that he would be all right. "No…I'm staying here," he announced firmly.

 

Lindsay and Mel exchanged worried glances, knowing that Brian was like a walking zombie at the moment, but they knew when he made up his mind he didn't back down. "Okay," Lindsay said to him with a tender smile. "But at least go get some coffee and take a short break, even if it's just down the hall to stretch your legs."

 

Brian let out a deep breath and twisted his neck in a vain effort to get the tight kinks out; his back and neck had gotten stiff as a board sitting in the uncomfortable, vinyl-covered convertible chair. Finally, with some reluctance he let go of Gus' hand and gently laid it down to stand up, reaching his hands high over his head and bending his torso backward to try and stretch. "Okay," he agreed. "But just for a couple of minutes. I'll be right back. You'll come get me if anything happens – if he wakes up – anything?"

 

Lindsay smiled softly at him. "Of course," she assured him. "Go on – we'll be right here."

 

Brian silently nodded as, with one last look at his son, he slowly plodded out of the room and stood in the hallway, checking to see which way to go to reach the first-floor vending machine room. Seeing a sign indicating where to go he turned to the right and lumbered down the overly-bright hallway; it seemed especially garish in light of coming out of Gus' purposely-dimmed room, sort of like walking out into bright sunshine after leaving a movie theater.

 

As he shuffled laboriously down the polished, tiled hallway, his exhausted, troubled mind was focused so intently on his son that he almost missed the door indicating the location of the vending machine room. Turning the knob to open it, his eyes widened as he yanked it open and ran headfirst into a blond, blue-eyed beauty coming out at the same time. He instantly recognized the man as the orderly who had so tenderly administered to his son last night after he had brought Gus in and his son had needed a way to get his temperature lowered.

 

Justin's face flushed as he came into physical contact with the same gorgeous man he had encountered last night; he almost fell just before the man reached out quickly and grabbed him by the upper arms to steady him. "Uh…I'm sorry – I didn't see you coming in," Justin breathlessly told him, feeling his pulse racing merely at the other man's touch.

 

Brian noticed he was still holding onto the blond orderly and released him with a slight shake of his head. "It's okay," he replied softly. The two men stood there for a few seconds as Brian gazed into the bluest pair of eyes he had ever seen before stating, "You're the man from last night – the one that gave my son a sponge bath and changed the cooling pad."

 

Justin swallowed hard. Even obviously exhausted at spending the entire night in the hospital – and it was obvious by the man's appearance that he had – he was even more gorgeous up close and personal than he had been last night, if that was even possible. "Yeah…..," he finally managed to confirm. "You're Mr. Kinney, right?" Of course, Justin already knew that – he had made a point of remembering the man's name. Something told him this man would be unforgettable, if only the circumstances were better.

 

"Brian," the gorgeous man responded. "Mr. Kinney makes me feel like I'm a hundred years old. Although right now I feel that old." He didn't know why in the hell he had just admitted that – he didn't even know this...this _orderly_. Why would he care how he felt?

 

Justin's face blushed a little as he repeated dutifully, almost reverently, "Brian…" He gave the other man an awkward smile as he suddenly thought of the reason why the man was at the hospital. "How is your son?"

 

Brian brushed a hand through his hair restlessly as he said, "He's about the same. His fever's gone down some, though. And he hasn't gotten any worse."

 

Justin nodded. "Those are good signs. And you seemed to have gotten him here right away – that's important, too," he said encouragingly with a slight smile.

 

Brian nodded silently, studying the kind, compassionate-looking face; being so close to this younger man made him realize just how beautiful he was – long, golden lashes, shining blond hair, full lips, and those eyes. They were a shade between an azure-colored cloudless sky and a newborn baby blue. He shook his head and berated himself, realizing his thoughts were straying. "Uh…I have to get back to my son's room," he explained. "I just came down to grab some coffee while his mothers were staying with him."

 

Justin frowned. "Mothers?" he asked, knowing it was none of his business but too curious not to ask anyway.

 

Why was it necessary to explain to this man? Brian wondered, as he found himself nonetheless explaining anyway. "His biological mother and her partner. They're raising him for the most part – I see him regularly but he lives with them."

 

Justin nodded, feeling oddly satisfied and pleased with this disclosure. He knew this man was here for his son and nothing else, but that fact left him feeling almost relieved in a way. That could certainly explain why there hadn't been a mother here last night when Gus was brought into the emergency room.

 

Both men continued to stand there for a few seconds longer, a little uncomfortable in the silence, until Justin finally said, "I won't keep you, then." He turned to go with a slight smile before turning around and saying, "I hope your son recovers soon. I have a good feeling about him, Brian. I think he's a fighter."

 

Brian actually smiled at that statement a little, warmed that someone had the same confidence in his son that he did. "He is," he agreed. "Thanks," he added softly. "For believing in him and for helping to take care of him last night."

 

Justin nodded again and, with a slight smile of his own, turned and opened the door to leave. Brian stood there for a few seconds, thoughtfully watching the blond go, before he plunked in four quarters into the nearest coffee machine and retrieved a cup of lukewarm coffee before heading back toward his son's room.

 


	5. A Peek of Light Begins to Shine

"Hi, Justin," Cathy McDonald called out with a smile from the ICU nurses' station upon seeing the young man who had recently begun working at the hospital; she had taken an instant liking to their newest orderly after seeing how he had cheered up a morose little girl who had been dreading her tonsillectomy a few months ago. Justin had voluntarily walked down to the ice cream store located a block down the street right after the patient had had her operation and had returned with a pint of bubble-gum flavored ice cream to soothe her sore throat. The radiant smile that he had managed to place on the sad little red-haired girl's cherubic, chubby face as a result of the ice cream, along with some amazing face painting of a cat complete with whiskers and a feline nose, had impressed her immensely; ever since then, she had made a point of keeping track of Justin's whereabouts.

 

Any time the hospital latched onto a compassionate, talented orderly like Justin, she tried to do everything she could to hold onto them; Justin was unique among most of the employees she had seen in that position. Too often, they were only there fleetingly until something better came along or they became bored with the more mundane aspects of their job. Justin, however, always seemed to have a smile on his face whether he was changing bed sheets or bringing one of the children their lunch. She had noticed, though, that his face positively lit up when he had a chance to spend extra time with the patients.

 

Justin walked up to the nurses' station and smiled. "Hi, Cathy. Busy today?" He asked, placing his hands briefly on the counter.

 

She shook her head. "No, thank God. For a change it's actually on the slow side today."

 

Justin grinned. "Just wait until knothole season starts up soon."

 

She chuckled. "Don't remind me - last year we saw more broken bones here than Evel Knievel."

 

Justin frowned. "Who?"

 

"Sorry," she replied sheepishly. "I guess I'm showing my age."

 

Justin's face smiled briefly in return before he sobered to ask softly, "How's the little boy in Room 7 - Gus Kinney?" Ever since he had run into the boy's father a couple of hours ago, he found he couldn't take his mind off their seriously-ill patient - or the patient's extremely handsome but exhausted parent. He knew Brian had to have stayed up all night with his son; it was obvious in his drawn face, haunted eyes, and disheveled clothes. Even in his worried state, however, Justin still thought he was the most incredible-looking man he had ever seen. He had been anxious to find out the latest on the little boy's condition, but this was the first chance he had gotten to check. He had been too busy delivering the morning's breakfast trays and had just gotten finished.

 

Cathy's delighted smile at seeing Justin faded somewhat as Justin's heart dropped; had his condition worsened? "Cathy?" he whispered in dread. _No….please…._

 

To his relief, however, Cathy told him, "He's still holding his own. We're monitoring his oxygen levels closely to make sure his breathing doesn't become labored; if that happens, he'll have to go on a ventilator, and I have a feeling his father would freak out in that case."

 

Thinking about how haggard the man had looked earlier, Justin had to agree with her; it was obvious this man loved his boy very much. "But he hasn't gotten any worse, has he?" he pressed her.

 

She shook her head. "No, in fact I think his fever's down just a bit over the last reading. So far, so good, I guess. He still hasn't regained consciousness yet, though."

 

Justin nodded soberly. He had been around the nursing staff enough to know that bacterial meningitis was serious business. It seems the little boy who reminded him so much of his handsome father wasn't out of the woods yet.

 

"Cathy?"

 

The nurse raised one eyebrow and looked at him. "Yeah?"

 

"Is Room No. 6 still unoccupied?" Justin had been assigned to tear down the bedding on the mattress and remake the bed late last night and hadn't heard of anyone needing replacement supplies; that normally indicated a new patient hadn't been brought in yet to use it.

 

His suspicions were confirmed when Cathy shook her head. "No, we haven't needed it yet. Kind of unusual for a Saturday, but _I'm_ not complaining." She peered curiously into the blond's eyes. "Why do you ask?"

 

Justin's face flushed a little; it really wasn't any of his business, but he couldn't get Brian Kinney's weary face out of his mind. "Do you think it'd be okay if the little boy's father took advantage of it for a while? I ran into him a couple of hours ago getting coffee out of the vending machine down the hall and he looked absolutely exhausted; I imagine he hasn't had any sleep since he brought his son in."

 

Cathy nodded; after seeing the man earlier, she had to concur with that assessment. "I don't see a problem with it as long as we don't need it." She grinned. "Besides, if we need it prepared for a new patient, I think I know an orderly who can take care of it."

 

Justin smiled gratefully, not sure why it was important to him, but he felt thankful that the man would be able to take a shower if he wanted to and get some rest. "Would you let him know?"

 

Cathy eyed the young man carefully. Justin had made no secret of the fact that he was gay; the subject had somehow come up when they had struck up a conversation the other day in the employee lounge and he had been quite upfront about the fact. Was it just possible, then, that her young friend was captivated with the attractive father keeping a close vigil over his son? She had no idea what Mr. Kinney's marital status was, and she knew his thoughts were solely with his little boy at the moment, but she couldn't help being amused by the idea of her young friend being enamored with the other man.

 

" _You_ can tell him, if you want," she suggested, trying hard not to let a knowing smile cross her face as she observed Justin blush slightly and avert his gaze. So someone _was_ interested in the elegant-looking father. She knew, though, that Justin wouldn't push the idea, especially under the sad circumstances the other man found himself in. Even if he _wasn't_ here watching over a seriously-ill child, she wasn't sure if Justin would have the courage to tell this other man how he felt anyway. _Well, that would be your loss, Mr. Kinney_ , she couldn't help thinking as she considered the compassion, creativity, and intelligence of her new-found acquaintance; unlike a lot of the other employees she had to deal with on a daily basis, Justin took his work seriously and never complained about what he was called to do.

 

"Uh, no…..you can do it," Justin whispered. "That's okay." He finally turned to look her in the eyes to say, "I….I have to go take care of getting some rooms ready upstairs. I'll catch you later."

 

Cathy smiled sympathetically at her friend's discomfort. "I'll take care of it, Justin," she assured him. "I'm sure he'll appreciate your thoughtfulness."

 

Justin looked almost aghast at the thought as he hastily replied, "No, you don't have to mention it was my idea…okay? I just wanted him to get some rest while the two moms were here to watch over his son."

 

Cathy raised one eyebrow. "Moms plural?"

 

Justin nodded as if it were the most natural thing in the world as he explained, "Brian told me that Gus lives with his biological mother and her partner most of the time."

 

Cathy had to admit she was a little taken aback at that statement, but it was certainly none of her business. But that _did_ indicate that Mr. Kinney was apparently unattached at the moment; whether or not he was gay was still up for determination, but at least her friend might just have a chance to get to know the man better, provided his son recovered. "Oh," she replied. "Well….uh, yeah, Justin, I'll let him know. And I'll keep quiet about where the idea came from if you want me to, okay?"

 

Justin nodded in relief. "Thanks," he told the nurse as he turned to go. "I'd better get going. I'll see you later - I'm here until 4:00."

 

Cathy smiled. "See you later, Justin." As she watched the slender blond walk away, she thought once more of how lucky they were to have him in their employ. He had proven to have a special affinity with the young patients that passed through their doors; he had a unique way of making them feel better just by spending time with them and giving them a little extra attention. And his artistic ability – the first time she had seen him sketch a drawing of a king and queen's village for a three-year-old blond girl who was suffering from leukemia, she was stunned by his talent. He had taken the back of a paper place mat and a few minutes later had magically transformed it into a medieval wonderland, complete with a turreted castle with a moat, knights on horseback, and ladies in waiting wearing flowing, rainbow-colored dresses. Rebecca, the little girl, had been absolutely captivated by it and had thankfully gone into remission a short time later. The doctors at the time had attributed her improvement to a bone marrow donor they had found, but Cathy didn't dismiss for an instant the impact she felt sure a certain orderly had had on their patient.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Brian stared at his son's still form as he laid his chin on the metal bed rail and continued to hold one soft, warm little hand; he was having difficulty keeping his own eyes open now after being awake for the past several hours, but he just couldn't leave his son. He had this horrible thought that the moment he left, something terrible – and final – would happen to him. If he should be gone when his son needed him the most…..

 

"Mr. Kinney?"

 

Brian raised his head as he, Mel and Lindsay turned to observe the head nurse, Cathy McDonald, walking in. She nodded at the two women and Brian as she advised, "I'm just checking his vitals."

 

Brian told the women who Cathy was and verified to her what Justin had told her earlier – that the two females sitting on the other side of the bed were Gus' mothers. Mel and Lindsay moved aside slightly to allow Cathy to check their son's IV fluid level and jot down his pulse, heart rate and blood pressure stats. She turned and picked up the same type of thermometer Brian had used on Gus at the loft yesterday and lightly brushed it across his forehead. She smiled slightly as three pairs of eyes looked at her anxiously. "99.4 – still going down," she reported, nodding encouragingly. "That's what we like to see."

 

A collective sigh escaped the room as Brian asked, "So why isn't he waking up?" The little boy hadn't moved so much as a muscle since he had been brought in last night.

 

"He's still suffering the effects of the illness," she told him. "Once the antibiotics take hold a little more he should start to wake up. It won't be an instant type thing," she cautioned him. "It's not like a light switch turning on. It will probably be gradual. But normally once a patient begins to regain consciousness, he should be more and more alert each time he wakes up."

 

"So you think he's going to recover?" Lindsay asked her as they all turned to stare at her expectantly.

 

She looked at them sympathetically. "That's not for me to say," she told them diplomatically. "I'll have to leave that up to the doctor to tell you. I'm sorry. But I _can_ say it's a good sign that his fever is going down – that at least indicates the medication is helping."

 

Brian sighed; at least that part was encouraging, but he would like concrete proof that his son was definitely going to beat this disease. _Please, Sonny Boy…..wake up_ , he silently pleaded as he stared into the flushed, still face. He couldn't help the wide yawn that escaped his lips, though, as he covered his mouth in response.

 

That reminded Cathy of the other part of her mission to her patient's room as she stole a glance at the handsome man and noticed his obvious state of exhaustion; Justin was right – he was in dire need of some sleep. "Uh…Mr. Kinney, we have a room next door that's not currently occupied if you would like to go lie down for a while and get some rest. You can also take a shower if you want."

 

Lindsay watched as Brian hesitated; he was clearly torn between needing desperately to get a little shut eye and not wanting to leave his son. To her, though, this seemed like the perfect solution. "Go on, Brian," she pressed him. "You'll be right next door. We'll come get you if anything happens, I promise."

 

Brian gazed over at his son briefly before admitting silently that he would be dead on his feet soon if he didn't at least go lie down for a while; and he had to admit, being able to take a shower sounded wonderful at the moment, too, if only to diminish some of the stiffness in his back and neck that he was feeling at the moment. He slowly, almost painfully, rose to his feet, reluctantly releasing his son's hand and gently lowering it back down onto the bed. "Okay," he agreed finally. "Maybe I will – but just for a little while." He turned to look at Cathy. "Thank you."

 

She nodded, knowing she had promised Justin not to say anything but unable to at least give credit where credit was due as she replied, "Don't thank me – it was one of the orderly's ideas." She paused for a second to allow that fact to sink in before adding, "The doctor should be in after a while to give you an update on Gus' condition – buzz the nurses' station in the meantime if you need anything, okay?"

 

Melanie and Lindsay nodded their thanks at her as the women watched her leave. Brian continued to stand near his son's bed, almost afraid to leave despite deciding to accept the nurse's offer.

 

"Go on, Brian," Lindsay softly prodded him. "We'll be right here."

 

He took one more look at his eerily-still son and finally nodded. "I'll be back in a little while," he promised them before turning and walking out the door to trod the short distance into the next room. As he walked into Room #6, he hesitated whether to close the door or not; he finally decided to keep it slightly ajar in case he was needed as he walked in and sat down on the made-up bed. It had two hospital-issued pillows and a lightweight, white chenille blanket on top. Sunlight was streaming in through the large, open windows but he could find no solace in its warmth as he walked over and pulled the drapes closed to swath the room in darkness – at least as dark as possible while still inside a bustling hospital.

 

He walked over to the adjoining, white-colored, antiseptic-looking bathroom and slowly peeled his wrinkled pants and perspiration-stained shirt off. He longed for a change of clothing, but at least he would be able to take advantage of the soap, washcloth and towels lying beside the single vanity bowl. Turning on the shower, he doffed the rest of his clothing as he waited a couple of minutes for the water to heat up sufficiently before stepping in and basking momentarily in its soothing warmth. He sighed as he took the bar of soap and lathered up the washcloth to slowly rub it over his tired body; a shampooing of his hair shortly followed as he stood there and simply relished in the simple pleasure the warm stream of water provided.

 

Fifteen minutes later, he emerged from the cubicle. He hated to have to put his same old, dirty clothes back on, but as he rubbed his hair to partially dry it with an additional towel, he at least felt somewhat refreshed by his shower.

 

As he left the steamy bathroom, he walked over to sit down on the hard mattress. Normally, he would have had a difficult time falling asleep on such an uncomfortable-feeling bed, but as he twisted his body around to lie fully prone on his back, he closed his eyes in exhaustion and was sound asleep within minutes.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_Three Hours Later_

Justin hesitated as he approached Room #6. This was the first time he had had an opportunity to be back in the ICU wing since he had spoken with Cathy. As he stopped in front of the room, he noticed the door was partially ajar – did that mean that Brian was taking advantage of his suggestion to get a little rest? He couldn't help taking a peek as he tentatively opened the door to enter. He glanced over at the bed and his heart did a flip flop; Brian was indeed lying on his back on the mattress, his lips slightly parted as he blew soft puffs of air between his lips while he slept. One long arm was lying on his stomach while the other one was resting on the pillow above his head. Even in his tousled, wrinkled state, he took Justin's breath away with his elegance and classic beauty.

 

He bit his lip as he secretly soaked in the sight of the other man, almost feeling like he was participating in some forbidden, voyeuristic pleasure as he continued to gaze at him. He was truly the most gorgeous man he had ever seen, and even though he hardly knew the man, it amazed him what feelings the brunet engendered in him. Just feasting on the sight of the brunet made his pulse speed up and his heart race in response. He was glad Brian had agreed to accept Cathy's suggestion to use the room; he knew how tired the other man had to be. No doubt he hadn't eaten anything, either, since he had brought his son in.

 

He tore his gaze away to quietly creep over to the nearby, wheeled side table and place the covered lunch tray he held in his hands down on the top. He risked one more glance over at Brian before reluctantly turning around and walking toward the door to leave, not being able to help taking one more look over at the sleeping god of a man before he finally opened the door and walked out, closing it behind him.

 

He jumped at the sound of a female voice that immediately called out to him. "Justin?"

 

"Fuck, Daphne….uh, Dr. Chanders!" he sheepishly corrected himself, as he turned around to peer into the amused face of his friend. "You scared the shit out of me!" he said softly, not wanting to risk waking Brian up behind the nearby door.

 

She stared back at him over his curious behavior, wondering why he was being so secretive. "What are you _doing_?"

 

Justin glanced back at the closed door before turning to her to vaguely advise, "Just delivering a lunch tray." _And imbibing in a little Brian Kinney appreciation, too_ , came unbidden to his mind as his face turned a slow shade of pink.

 

Daphne stared at him intently, feeling there was more to her friend's statement, but she was unable to ascertain just why she felt that way. It wasn't unusual for Justin to deliver food trays for the patients as one of his duties as an orderly, but he certainly looked guilty about something, though. "Oh….well, are we still on for lunch?"

 

Justin smiled at her, partly in response to her friendly inquiry but also due to relief over not being caught participating in a little bit of _another_ activity… "Sure," he confirmed, nodding. "One o'clock, right?" he asked.

 

She nodded. "Yeah….I've got a few more patients to see with the ER doctor, but I should be able to meet you there. I'm already starving," she confided as a corresponding growl of her stomach erupted as if on perfect cue. She sighed as she looked down to her stomach and patted it before saying, "I know, I know….just a little longer," she promised.

 

Justin laughed, saying, "Sometimes I worry about you, _Doctor."_ He nodded as Daphne shrugged and smiled. "Sounds good,though – tell your stomach I'm getting hungry myself; I'll see you then."

 

"Good." She grinned and nodded before rushing off down the hall to continue her rounds as Justin let out a breath of relief and turned to walk toward the supply room; now that lunch duties were over, it was time for him to begin his _own_ version of close encounters – with all the unoccupied beds needing to be changed. He sighed as he began to proceed down the hall to work on finishing his next task before his lunch date with Daphne.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_Fifteen Minutes Later_

Brian's brain began to register the aroma of food as his eyes slowly fluttered open; it was still relatively dim in the room, but as he turned his head to gaze at the closed windows, he could make out enough of a slip of sunlight and its changed angle as it peeked through to know he had been asleep longer than he had intended to be.

 

"Damn it," he muttered, as he sat up abruptly in the bed and rubbed his face with his hands. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut for a moment before opening them again and swinging his body around in the bed to place his feet on the linoleum floor. Glancing over at the wood-like, laminate, narrow bed table, he realized now what had awakened him – someone had placed a food tray down on the top of it.

 

He hesitated for a few seconds, hating to stay away from his son any longer than necessary, but the smells coming from the three covered plates of food were too enticing. He hadn't eaten in several hours and he was just now realizing how ravenous he was. Reaching over to pull the bedside table closer to the mattress, he lifted up one of the dishes to note a plate filled with what appeared to be turkey and dressing with mashed potatoes and a roll. Next to the plate was a glass of water with a round, white plastic cover on it. He lifted two, additional smaller covers for a couple of other plates to discover a small side salad and a piece of some type of cake underneath.

 

He couldn't resist taking advantage of the surprisingly palatable-looking food by picking up the fork nestled in a paper napkin at the side of the tray and taking a bite of the turkey. The food was still warm, so whoever had delivered it had been in the room recently. He wondered who it had been; no one was even supposed to be occupying this room, so how would they have even known to deliver a food tray? As he began to eat the food in earnest now, he reached over to take a sip of the water and thought about what the nurse, Cathy, had told them. An "orderly" had apparently made the suggestion to allow Brian use of this room next door to his son. The only orderly he had had contact with lately had been the young, blue-eyed blond he had encountered on two separate occasions now; the man's beauty hadn't eluded him, even though his attention was currently very much focused on his son. And obviously, there had to be several orderlies employed at a hospital the size of this one, so it could have been anyone of them; but was it possible, though, that...what was his name? He searched his mind for a moment before the name came to him... _Justin_. Was it possible that Justin had suggested the idea? For some inexplicable reason, he found himself hoping so as he finished up his meal in record time and downed the last of his water.

 

Pushing the tray and table aside, he stood up to walk back over to the bathroom to relieve himself before donning his shoes and walking quickly toward the door. He was anxious to get back to see Gus and find out if there had been any improvement. He was about to open the door when it suddenly swung open and he stared in the wide eyes of his friend.

 

"Come quick!" Lindsay shouted as she grabbed Brian's sleeve and pulled him toward Gus' room. His heart began to beat furiously in fear; had something happened while he had been asleep?

 

As the two friends rushed into the adjoining room, though, Brian stopped dead in his tracks. Melanie actually smiled back at him as he gazed into the now _opened_ eyes of their son. "Oh, my God," he said softly as he slowly walked over to the side of the bed and looked into the chocolate brown eyes that were fluttering open and closed. "Have you called the doctor?" he asked, unable to look away at the sight.

 

"Yeah – I buzzed the nurse; she said he'll be right here. He just now woke up," Lindsay told him, smiling as she walked over to the other side of the bed and leaned over the railing next to Mel.

 

"Hey, Sonny Boy," Brian whispered to the drowsy-looking child as he took his hand in his. "Daddy's right here with your Mommies. You're going to be just fine, Buddy," he told the boy with a soft smile, his eyes suddenly awash with unshed tears. Until that moment, he hadn't been sure if he would ever see his son's eyes again and he had always taken that fact for granted. Never again would he do that for as long as he lived as he gazed into the disoriented-looking face of his son.

 

Brian could see Gus' lips moving as he licked his lips but his eyes did not seem particularly focused on anything specific. "Don't try to talk, Gus," Brian told him softly. He reached over to brush some sweaty hair back from his son's forehead as Lindsey took Gus' other hand. Mel reached out to gently grasp his upper shoulder as they all turned at the sound of someone entering the room.

 

Dr. Broderick nodded at the three parents as he glanced down at his patient. "I see someone's trying to wake up," he stated. "Let me take a look," he asked as he approached Mel and Lindsey's side of the bed and they pulled back enough for him to squeeze in between them and their son. He pulled back Gus' open pajama top and placed his stethoscope against the small chest to listen to his heartbeat for several seconds before he gently pulled back the child's eyelids to examine his pupils. Picking up the nearby chart for his patient, he noted the last temperature reading – 99.2 – and Gus' last vitals notations before flipping it closed and nodding in satisfaction. Gus' eyes were already fluttering closed once more as Broderick looked up to say, "He's definitely responding to the antibiotics as we had hoped he would. I think with the proper amount of rest and continued use of the medication, along with Tylenol to control the pain, he's got an excellent chance of recovering fully. And since it was caught in its earlier stages, I'm hopeful he won't suffer any lasting side effects from his illness."

 

Brian let out a deep breath he was holding as the two women did the same. The tension in the room seemed to immediately lessen as the three of them smiled at each other in relief.

 

The doctor actually smiled back slightly himself as he advised, "He won't regain full consciousness for a while yet – periods of going in and out of consciousness are quite normal with a disease such as this, so don't get alarmed if he doesn't stay awake for long periods of time at first. As the bacteria works its way out of his system, though, he should start regaining consciousness for longer periods of time. He'll need to stay in the hospital at least for a few days' longer so we can continue to monitor him. But if he continues to improve, I think we can look at moving him to a private, isolated room on one of the regular floors. He will have to be restricted from seeing other visitors, though, and can only be seen by those who have taken prophylactics."

 

"Prophylactics?" Brian asked, gazing once more over at his now-sleeping son. The only _prophylactics_ he knew about were the ones he pulled onto his cock just before he enjoyed his favorite activity.

 

"Preventive antibiotics to ensure no one else catches what your son has," he explained politely.

 

Brian nodded. Oh…. _those_ types of preventive measures….

 

The doctor took one more quick glance at the machine keeping track of Gus' vitals. "I'm very glad your son is responding to the medication," he told the trio. "I'll be back in to check on him again later. If you need anything, just contact the nurses' station right across the hall and they'll page me if necessary."

 

"Thank you, Doctor," Brian said, smiling broadly now as the two women echoed his words of gratitude. The doctor nodded before turning to leave the room.

 

Brian lightly caressed his son's wrist as he turned his gaze once more upon the angelic face of his child. The face seemed more at peace now, more of a normal complexion. For the first time since he had brought Gus in, he was finally beginning to feel some hope. "That's my boy," he whispered to his son. "That's my little fighter." As he softly said those words aloud, he couldn't help remembering when someone else had told him that same thing. Vowing to track down the source of those encouraging words later, he sat down once more next to his son, feeling like an enormous burden had at last been lifted from his heart.

 


	6. Can't Get Him Out of His Mind

_Roberto's Restaurant – 1:15 p.m._

 

Justin glanced up from his booth and smiled as a whirl of energy came rushing in and sat down on the opposite side. "I am so sorry!" Daphne told him, letting out an audible exhale of air as she slid over farther into the booth. "I was just getting ready to leave the hospital when Dr. Broderick paged me. It never fails - I've decided it's some type of Murphy's Law or something, even though they never taught me that in medical school. Have you been waiting long? I'm starving!" She picked up her glass of water and took a sip, finally providing an amused Justin with a chance to speak as she eyed him back animatedly. It always amazed him how many words his friend could muster without having to take a breath first.

 

He shook his head at her as she picked up the menu to take at look at the lunch specials listed on the back. "No," he told her, "I just got here a few minutes ago. The lunchtime trays were running a little late today." Of course, the fact that he had made a special trip down to the ICU floor just to deliver one lunch tray to a certain dark-haired man in particular had also helped to make him a little late, but he wasn't going to admit that to Daphne, although she would probably find it extremely enlightening if he chose to disclose it.

 

She nodded as she put her menu back down. "Good," she said, as the waitress came up with paper and pencil to take their orders. As she left their booth a few minutes later, the young woman suddenly remembered something she wanted to tell her friend. "By the way, I almost forgot. Remember the little boy you were asking about that was brought in by his father last night? The one that has the bacterial meningitis?"

 

Justin felt his heart began to pound anxiously while he struggled to maintain a casual, nonchalant look as he nodded back at his friend silently; inside, though, it felt like butterflies were flying all over his stomach in an unsuccessful attempt to escape. Had the little boy gotten worse since he had last seen him? He could tell how much the child's handsome father loved his son – it was apparent in the etched lines of concern on his face and in his drawn, haggard appearance. If something had happened to him, he knew this man would be devastated.

 

His heart, though, soared with hope at the smile on his friend's face as she revealed, "He actually woke up briefly a little while ago, and his fever's gone down. You can never be a hundred percent positive with those types of illnesses, but Dr. Broderick thinks there's a good chance he's going to make a full recovery eventually – and without any nasty side effects."

 

Justin's face broke out into a relieved smile. "That's great, Daphne!" he cried. "I'm so glad to hear that. I imagine his father is very relieved, too."

 

Daphne eyed him curiously; Justin seemed awfully concerned about the little boy's father as well as the patient himself. Although she admired the fact that Justin genuinely cared about any child at the hospital who was seriously ill, was it possible her friend had more than just a clinical passing interest in this particular case? "Yeah," she told him, as she stared back thoughtfully at her friend. "Dr. Broderick said the father was in the room earlier with the two moms when the little boy came to and he examined him." She didn't attempt to explain the "two moms" part - she had seen enough weird and/or unusual family units in the short time that she had been a resident that nothing pretty much fazed her at this point.

 

Gus?" she scrunched up her face, trying to recall if that was the boy's name or not. "I think that's his name," she said, as Justin nodded in confirmation. "He was only semi-conscious for a few seconds, but the doctor's optimistic about his chances. The father got him to the hospital right away, which is always important in these types of cases. He did seem very relieved when the doctor told them his son's chances of recovery were excellent."

 

Justin nodded, a smile of relief readily apparent on his face. _Uh, huh…._ Daphne couldn't help thinking perceptively as she observed her friend. _Bingo..._

 

"Uh, Justin…Speaking of the boy's father – a little birdie told me that one of the orderlies had arranged for him to catch some shut eye and take a shower in the empty room next to his son's; and I could have sworn I saw an empty lunch tray sitting near the bed when I walked by there earlier. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?" Her chocolate-brown eyes twinkled good-naturedly as she instantly saw a blush creep up her friend's neck and into his face as he smiled over innocently at her. Well, it didn't take a doctor with a Ph D to figure out the answer to _that_ question apparently.

 

Justin appeared flustered by her line of questioning as he mumbled, "Uh….why would you think I had something to do with it? There's lot of orderlies at the hospital," he pointed out, averting his gaze downward to pick at his checkered red-and-white paper napkin lying on the Formica-covered table.

 

She laughed softly. "You're not a very good liar, my friend," she chided him. She smiled broadly at him as she announced gleefully, "Justin Taylor…..I do believe you have a crush on that man! Although – I have to admit, he _IS_ drop-dead gorgeous." She grinned at him impishly as he finally met her gaze, only to promptly cover his face with his hands in mortification.

 

He uncovered his eyes after a few seconds, though, to stare back at her sheepishly; his new friend was simply too smart for her own good – and maybe _his…._. He rolled his eyes slightly and twisted one side of his mouth upward as he realized that a certain nurse must have somehow let the cat out of the bag, even though she hadn't named names. Daphne apparently hadn't had any problem, though, figuring out just which intern had been responsible for the hospitality.

 

"Okay," he admitted, holding his hands up in surrender. "Maybe I _did_ have something to do with it. But I was just trying to help him out, that's all. I ran into him earlier when he was getting some coffee out of the vending machine, and I could tell by the look on his face that he couldn't have gotten any sleep since his son had been brought in – he looked exhausted. The room next to his son's was empty, and I just asked Cathy if it would be okay for him to use it. _She's_ actually the one that mentioned it to him. And I had an extra lunch tray left over from my deliveries for the upper floors – they must have messed up on how many were needed, and I thought he might want something to eat when he woke up, so I left it there for him while he was asleep. End of story." Although Justin knew that part about the tray being an extra was a bold-faced lie; he had made up a story for the cafeteria manager that he had inadvertently dropped one of the trays and needed an extra one.

 

Daphne's eyes lit up – her friend was _so_ busted. Justin's face said it all – she had hit the nail right on the head. She wasn't the _only_ one that found him quite attractive. Now if she could just figure out if the sexy father was unattached, this situation could become quite interesting…She made a silent note to check the guarantor information for Gus Kinney at the first chance she had. She had already met the two women partners who were mainly in charge of raising the boy, so there was at least a chance that the proverbial tall, dark and handsome father might just be available for a little matchmaking endeavor…..

 

Daphne smirked. "Uh, huh…..," she said, crossing her hands over her chest and staring at him in amusement. "That's all there is to it…..you were just doing your job."

 

Justin flushed an even deeper shade of pink under her intense scrutiny until at last he sighed. "Okay, okay," he conceded ruefully, picking up his fork with his right hand to idly play with it. "I have noticed he's been, shall we say, blessed with an embarrassment of riches in the good-gene department."

 

Daphne laughed at her friend's unorthodox description. "Justin – just admit it! Even rumpled and exhausted, the man's sexy as hell!"

 

Justin joined in her laughter. "All right, all right, I've noticed. He's fucking hot as all get out! Are you happy now?"

 

She grinned back at him triumphantly as the waitress returned to their booth and laid down a large-size garlic chicken pizza and two serving plates in the center of their table before asking if they needed anything and then leaving when they shook their heads.

 

She nodded her head as the woman left. "Yeah, I am….that's what I thought," she said smugly as she grinned back at Justin. "So what do you know about Mr. Studly?"

 

Justin shook his head at his friend; for a full-time, pediatric resident, Daphne could be downright sophomoric at times. "Daphne….the man just brought his son into the ICU last night, and he's been kind of preoccupied with that. He hasn't exactly had a lot of time to divulge personal information to me," he said teasingly before his expression sobered under the harsh specter of reality. "Not that he would anyway – I'm sure to him, I'm just a plain, ordinary low-level hospital employee." He knew practically nothing about Brian Kinney, but from the expensive clothing he wore, his meticulously-manicured hands, his tanned, toned body, and even the way he carried himself, something told him he was definitely out of his league. Why would a man like that possibly be interested in someone like _him?_

 

He abruptly came out of his daydreaming as he felt Daphne lightly slap the top of his hand from across the table. He frowned back at her, one eyebrow rising to ask, "What was _that_ for?"

 

Her eyes flashed as she growled affectionately, "That is for putting yourself down, Justin! Come on! You are so much more than some average hospital flunky! You work hard at what you do, you're dependable, you can be relied on….."

 

"Why do I feel like a boy scout now?" he quipped sullenly. Despite his friend's best intentions, her description of him wasn't exactly raising his self-esteem level.

 

"Let me finish," she retorted, as Justin obediently made a zipping motion across his lips in response. She nodded in satisfaction before continuing. "Most importantly of all, though, you're using your incredible artistic talent to make the children feel better, some of which might never get to leave the hospital. I've seen you with them, Justin. Even though they could be having a positively horrible day, and may have even lost all hope of getting better, one visit with you and their spirits are lifted up. Having a positive outlook is so crucial to a patient's recovery, so who's to say you haven't had a major part in that? To me, that makes you one very special person. And if this man can't see that, well…..then it would just be his loss." And with that being said, she reached out to grab a slice of the thick, pan pizza and stick the end in her mouth to take a bite.

 

Justin had to laugh as his friend finished her speech and promptly began to chew on her food. "Thanks for the testimonial, Daphne," he told her as she smiled back at him and continued to savor her first, real meal of the day. "I'll keep that in mind the next time someone throws up in their room and the nurse calls for a clean-up." He imitated his friend's motion, reaching out to snag a center piece of the pizza that had the most sauce and chicken on it as he held it up to his mouth and took a large bite. "Mmmm," he couldn't help commenting through his closed mouth. He licked his lips in appreciation. "I've been waiting all morning for this," he admitted as Daphne grinned back at him and nodded.

 

" _You_?" she groused. "This is the first chance I've had to get any substantial food in my stomach since last night. Of course, four hours' sleep and garlic pizza don't mix too well. Thank God for antacids," she exclaimed gratefully, reaching in her white uniform pocket to pull out a small bottle for emphasis. She hurriedly opened the container up to grab a chewable tablet and place it in her mouth before reaching for another piece of their lunch.

 

Justin shook his head in sympathy as well as amazement. "I still don't know how you survive on that type of schedule," he told her. "How do they expect you to function with so little sleep?"

 

"Well, they claim as a resident you should know your specialty like the back of your hand by the time you graduate," she told him. "That's probably because you need to be able to do it in your sleep, because most of the time I _feel_ like I'm sleepwalking." She twisted her mouth up in the corner wryly before the unwelcome intrusion of her cell phone sounded. "Shit!" she muttered as she reached in her pocket to answer. "Dr. Chanders," she answered after flipping it open.

 

Justin watched her expression for a few seconds before hearing her wearily say, "I'll be right there," and he knew their lunch date was over; he had been on enough outings with his friend to know what that sentence meant by now.

 

She shook her head apologetically as she hung up the phone. "Have to go," she said unnecessarily. She raised her hand to get the waitress's attention, quickly requesting a carryout box. "At least I'll have something for dinner…if I get a chance to eat it, that is," she said jokingly as the woman soon brought over a white, square, Styrofoam box for her to use. She quickly placed a couple pieces of the pizza in the container and stood up. "I'm sorry, Justin," she said as she turned to go. "Maybe we can do this again soon." Of course, with her residency, Daphne knew enough not to promise anything specific – her schedule was so screwy making definite arrangements was always risky.

 

Justin smiled. "No problem, I understand," he said. "Go; I'm sure we'll see each other later. I'm here until 11:00 today." Invariably, the two of them always met somewhere inside the hospital during Daphne's rounds and his own duties. Sometimes it provided them with a few minutes to speak; other times, their encounter was barely a hello. It just depended on the drama playing out at any given time.

 

"Working another double shift?" she asked as Justin nodded. Her friend had told her a few weeks ago that he was trying to work some extra hours due to his tuition being raised this year at PIFA. She smiled back at him. "Well, I'll try and track you down later, then." Just before she turned to leave, she added, "Don't forget what I said, okay?" He nodded back at her with a slight smile of gratitude. With a quick wave of her hand then, she retrieved her pizza and quickly rushed from the restaurant as fast as she had arrived.

 

Justin watched his petite friend disappear as he sighed. He promised Daphne to remember her words of encouragement, but he was still not convinced that even if Brian Kinney _was_ available, the man would ever be attracted to someone like him. Besides, as much as he was glad to hear the man's little boy was apparently on the mend, he also knew a child didn't recover from bacterial meningitis overnight; he would need several days of observation and attention before he was completely well. No doubt until then, this man's attention would be reserved only for his son, as any loving and responsible father's should be.

 

A few minutes later, having boxed up his remaining lunch, Justin, too, walked out of the restaurant and back to the hospital to resume his duties there.

 

* * *

 

_One Hour Later – 3:00 p.m._

 

Brian gazed down into his son's face as he rested his head on the bedside railing. Ever since Gus had opened his eyes earlier, he had been anxiously waiting for the next time when he would do it again. It was almost as if he was trying to make sure that he, Mel and Lindsay hadn't simply imagined it had happened. He knew logically that it had – after all, he was there when his son's doctor had come into the room to provide them with a promising prognosis for him – but still, his heart was vulnerable and fragile enough at the moment to doubt that it had actually occurred. "Come on, Sonny Boy," he found himself whispering aloud as he stared at the sleeping form. "Wake up again." _Please….._ he silently begged.

 

He was presently alone with his son, Mel and Lindsay having been persuaded to take a short break and visit the cafeteria on the next floor to grab something to eat; they had rushed back to Pittsburgh as soon as Brian had called and, like him, had forgone eating anything due to their concern over Gus. Now that it appeared their child was hopefully out of the woods, he had encouraged them to grab a bite to eat while he sat and watched over him.

 

He had to admit – now that he had been able to get a few hours of much-needed sleep, a shower, and some food in his belly, and of course now that his son was doing better – he felt like an entirely different man. The almost crushing weight that had settled on his shoulders ever since he had brought Gus into the emergency room last night was slowly lifting to be replaced with a more hopeful outlook.

 

As he continued to study his son's face, which was now definitely more normal in color, his thoughts strayed back to the blond orderly that he had first seen last night right after he had arrived with his son. He had run into him again later as he had been getting coffee. Both times, even though he had been dead on his feet and barely aware of his surroundings, he had been struck by the man's almost ethereal beauty – the blond, golden hair, sticking out somewhat stubbornly at his nape and behind his ears, his slender but toned frame, his face that was perfectly proportioned, feature by feature, his lips, particularly the bottom, full one that looked just ripe for the plucking, but most of all those eyes – when he had literally run into the man unexpectedly at the vending machine door, those eyes had almost pulled him in with their color – like a cloudless, bright spring day when the sky seemed impossibly blue.

 

Even with the man's beauty, however, what had struck Brian about the man most of all had been his compassion. He could tell this orderly wasn't just going through the motions in his role at the hospital; this man really cared about what he was doing. He could tell in the gentleness of his hands when he had ministered to his son as he tried to help get his fever down, and in the concerned sound of his voice when he had asked how Gus was. And even though the other man didn't know either him _or_ his son well, he was perceptive enough to determine that his son was a fighter – it was that quality that was serving Gus well at the moment as he slowly battled to recover from his illness.

 

Once again, he wondered if this was the same orderly that had been responsible for him being able to catch some much-needed sleep and rejuvenate himself with the shower and some food. He resolved to find out before he and his son left the hospital. He smiled at that hopeful, wonderful thought – at least now he could begin to actually look forward to that day.

 

As if on cue, his head popped up and his heart began to pound as he noticed the fingers on his son's right hand moving slightly. He knew he wasn't imagining _this._ "Gus?" he whispered softly. "It's Daddy. Can you hear me? Wake up, Buddy," he urged, reaching over to take his son's hand and give it a reassuring squeeze. "Open your eyes, Sonny Boy." _Come on, Gus…..Wake up_ , he silently pleaded as he held his breath in anxious anticipation.

 

Finally, there it was – his son's eyelids were fluttering again, struggling to open. "That's right, Buddy," Brian whispered excitedly. "Open your eyes, Gus – come on, you can do it!" he said a little louder. "Wake up for Daddy!" He began to slowly rub his hand up and down Gus' arm, back and forth, in a subconscious attempt to help his son wake up as the boy continued to show signs of stirring. "Come on, Sonny Boy!" he said a little more loudly, the hope growing stronger and stronger by the second. "Daddy's right here – wake up, Gus!"

 

At last, the eyelids fluttered a little more and he could see just a slit of his son's eyes peeking through as he struggled to rise from his sluggish stupor. "That's it, Buddy," he pressed. "Open your eyes for me!" His face broke out into a broad smile as his son's eyes opened up even further; they weren't quite focused on him, but they were open almost all the way at last. As Brian gazed into the soft-brown, somewhat clouded eyes, he thought it was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. "That's my boy," he crowed, reaching over to tenderly push his son's bangs back from his forehead. He was pleased to notice that his son's skin seemed almost cool to the touch – it was a distinct improvement over his child's previous, feverish temperature. "Can you stay awake for Daddy?" he beseeched softly as he noticed the little boy's eyelids slowly closing; as much as he wanted his son to stay awake longer, however, he watched nevertheless with some sadness as the eyes once more closed and his son slipped back into slumber. The doctor had prepared them for this probability – after all, his son was still recovering from a serious illness and this was a typical reaction to the disease – but still, he couldn't help feeling disappointed. He sighed as he gazed once more at the still form of his son as the eyes remained closed. He knew it was going to take time. He just had to keep focusing on the positive side – his son was going to get better; he was going to get well. He just wished it would not take so long.

 

He vowed as he continued to hold his son's tiny hand that he wouldn't miss one more opportunity to spend as much time as he could with this precious child – his own flesh and blood that he had helped bring into the world. He had taken for granted that Gus would always be around, that they would have all the time in the world to get to know each other more, and that he could gradually grow into the father's role that had been thrust upon him. Now he knew better – he realized that that assumption could be taken away in an instant. He had always loved his son deeply – but now he knew how precious such a gift was. "I love you, Sonny Boy," he whispered as he reached down to place a soft kiss on his cheek. "And as soon as you're all better, we're going to take a vacation somewhere special – just the two of us," he promised. He looked up as he heard a soft commotion near the door.

 

Lindsay walked in with Mel and handed him a paper cup containing some black coffee. "How is he?" she asked as Brian took the proffered liquid.

 

He smiled at them. "He woke up again," he told them.

 

"Shit!" Mel exclaimed as she looked at Lindsay, disappointed they weren't there when it happened. She looked over at their sleeping son to see if he looked different somehow, but he appeared just the same as when they had left him. "He did? For how long?"

 

"Just for a couple of minutes," Brian told them as the two women took their customary spot on the other side of the bed to stare down at him intently. Gus was so still at the moment, it was hard to believe he had been conscious just a few minutes ago.

 

"Did he say anything, Brian?" Lindsay asked him eagerly. Her face fell slightly as Brian shook his head.

 

"No," he confirmed. "He just opened his eyes for a few minutes – he really wasn't even focusing on anything in particular. He _did_ move his fingers a little bit, though – that's how I knew he was trying to wake up again."

 

The two women looked down at their child. "It's so hard to be patient," Lindsay admitted as Mel placed her arm around her shoulders and gave it a small, comforting squeeze. Their son at least looked much more restful and at peace than he had been when they had first seen him, however; she supposed that was something as she leaned her head on her partner's shoulder.

 

"I know," Brian admitted; he certainly knew how that felt. Each hour in the hospital since Gus had been admitted had seemed like a fucking day. At least now there seemed to be light at the end of the tunnel. He just wished it wasn't taking so long to get there. "The doctor said it's going to be a gradual recovery, though," he reminded them, trying hard to remember that himself.

 

"I know," Lindsay murmured as she reached over to lightly stroke her son's cheek. "I just want him to get well so badly."

 

"We all do, Wendy," Brian whispered. "We all do."

 

* * *

 

_Same Time – Medical Records Department_

 

"Here it is, Dr. Chanders," the redheaded employee told the young woman as she handed her a folder.

 

"Thanks, Marjorie," Daphne responded as she reached to take the proffered documents from the older woman. "I just need to take a quick look at something." She turned her back and leaned against the counter to open the folder on Gus Kinney and take a peek at the patient information sheet tacked to the left-hand side. As she quickly scanned the form, her eyes lit up as she began to read the information: Guarantor – father, Brian Kinney; employment: self-employed owner of Kinnetik; marital status: _single_. She couldn't help the broad smile that broke out on her face at that particular piece of information.

 

"Thanks, Marjorie," she called out to the administrative assistant as she closed the folder and handed it back to her. "I've found the information I needed." Humming to herself, she turned and walked back down the hallway, furiously trying to conjure up various ways to put that information to good use.

 

* * *

 

Dr. Broderick scanned the vital stats information for his young patient as he nodded silently, satisfied. He quietly closed the chart and raised his eyes to look at the three family members. "His fever has gone down to 99.1," he told them. "Close to normal now. And all his other vitals are looking better by the hour." He smiled. "He's coming along nicely. I anticipate his periods of wakefulness will be longer and longer now. We'll continue to monitor him closely, but if he keeps up this progress, I believe he can be transferred to a private room tomorrow. I'm going off rounds now, but my associate, Dr. Chanders, will be available if you need anything in the meantime."

 

Three faces peered back at him in relief and happiness as Brian said, "Thank you, Doctor, that's wonderful news." The doctor nodded in acknowledgement before turning around and leaving.

 

"You hear that, Sonny Boy?" Brian whispered down to his son as he smiled at him tenderly; he knew his son couldn't see him at the moment, but he didn't care. He was ecstatic over the news his son was going to be transferred to a regular room tomorrow. "You're busting out of here soon."

 

"Now, Brian, it's not a done deal, you know," Lindsay gently reminded him.

 

"Yes, it is," he said firmly. "This is my son we're talking about." He had no doubt it would happen – it _had_ to.

 

Mel rolled her eyes at Brian's statement of possession – after all, he wasn't the only one that laid claim to Gus, but Lindsay simply smiled sympathetically and nodded. She knew how happy and relieved her friend was that Gus was recovering, just like she felt. She noticed her friend's wrinkled clothes and realized he had to be wearing the same outfit he had had on when he had brought their son in yesterday; at least she and Mel had been able to prepare a little better and had a suitcase stuffed with other outfits at their disposal. "Brian?" she said as he raised an eyebrow in response. "I'm sure you'd like to change your clothes and maybe grab another shower. Since Gus seems to be out of the woods now, why don't you run home for a few minutes? Mel and I will stay right here until you get back."

 

Brian hesitated; he knew the women wouldn't leave their son, and he was fairly confident now that Gus was finally heading toward a complete recovery, but the fear that something inexplicable and unexpected could happen still nagged at him. "I don't know…." he began, torn over what to do. He had been sweating profusely in the stuffy hospital room, partly over the temperature but also over worry for his son, and dearly wanted to change into some fresh, clean clothes, but the thought of leaving his son concerned him. "I don't think I should leave…..just in case….."

 

Mel looked over at him with grudging respect, surprised at Brian's reaction. This was not the typical devil-may-care, part-time, only-when-I-feel-like-it father she had come to know previously. Perhaps the man was finally beginning to come around. Normally, she would have found herself resenting the man for hinting that she and her partner couldn't be trusted to take care of their own son during his brief absence, but she actually found his reluctance to leave admirable given the circumstances.

 

"Suit yourself," she finally said neutrally, choosing to neither praise nor condemn him for his decision. "But we're not going anywhere, either."

 

" _I_ could go get you some clothes," was the soft response that came from the doorway. Brian's head turned to observe the same, beautiful orderly he had seen twice before standing somewhat awkwardly by the open door. His breath caught in his throat unsuspectingly as he couldn't help appreciating the man's appearance – even in his nondescript, white orderly's uniform, the man was still a slender, walking wet dream.

 

"Excuse me?" Brian said politely, trying hard not to show how the other man affected him.

 

Justin flushed at the intense looks of curiosity all three parties were giving him. As he glanced over at the two women, he knew the pair must be Gus' mothers that he had heard about, even though they had yet to meet formally. He noticed the two women exchanging a mutual look of puzzlement as he stammered, "Uh…I'm sorry – I was just walking by and couldn't help overhearing your conversation." He slowly walked farther into the room to stand near the bed as he explained to the two women, "I work here as an orderly." They nodded their heads as he turned to look at Brian and said, "If you didn't want to leave, I could borrow some clothes from the laundry. They would just be maintenance clothes – black work pants and a gray cotton shirt – but they would be clean at least." As he spoke, he glanced down at the little boy, observing with happiness that the child definitely had better color and seemed to be resting more comfortably than the last time he had seen him.

 

As he stood there being meticulously scrutinized by the others, he couldn't help thinking he was out of his mind. Why hadn't he just continued walking by as he came closer to Gus' room? Perhaps the more important question was, what was he even doing down here in the _first_ place? He was supposed to be upstairs right now, working on changing the bedding in all the empty rooms. Of course, as his face warmed while they continued to stare at him like he had grown another head, he knew the answer - his burning desire and curiosity to find out how the little boy was doing, along with his hope to run into the devastatingly handsome boy's father, had made his feet almost move of their accord as he somehow found himself down in the ICU. And before he could prevent the thought from escaping his lips, he had actually offered to bring a maintenance man's outfit down to this elegant man peering over at him with what – amusement? Indignant scorn? He cringed internally as one thought kept creeping through his head over and over - Was he out of his fucking mind?

 

He shook his head as if to try and clear the ridiculous notion from his brain as he began to back up slowly, regretting his brazen presumptuousness. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to intrude….I just wanted to see how Gus was doing…." He cursed himself for sounding so juvenile, telling himself to get a grip – he would be out of the room soon…..He managed to make it to the door and just outside into the hallway before he was hindered from progressing any further.

 

"Justin."

 

The sound of that rich, velvety, commanding voice stopped him in his tracks and he slowly turned around to raise his eyes and gaze into the elegant man's hazel orbs that were studying him intently. "Yes?" he whispered, nervously hugging his hands around his waist.

 

Brian curled his lips under in amusement at the other man's discomfiture, feeling inexplicably like he was the big, bad wolf and this rather apprehensive-looking, blond beauty was Goldilocks in disguise. He inched closer to his target until he was standing a few feet away; again, he couldn't help being struck by the shade of the blonde's eyes, which were presently so wide and expressive. What was he seeing there? Anxiety? Fear? Puzzlement? Interest perhaps? Well, he could always hope anyway.

 

"I just wanted to thank you for all you've done," Brian told him softly; and he really did mean that. This man had gone out of his way to make both him and his son comfortable during a very difficult time. "Gus is doing much better – he's woken up a couple of times now and the doctor thinks he's eventually going to be just fine."

 

Justin blushed at the scrutiny he was receiving as his face broke out in a broad smile at the news of Gus's condition.

 

Brian's heart began to beat furiously and he was taken aback by the brilliance of the orderly's smile as Justin added humbly, "Uh….I was just doing my job."

 

"Maybe with the cooling pad and the sponge bath," Brian agreed, noticing an attractive shade of pink tingeing the other man's cheeks. "But arranging for me to use the room next door to get some sleep and to take a shower? And leaving me something to eat? I doubt that's part of your job. Not to mention offering to get me a fresh change of clothes."

 

Justin opened his mouth, initially planning on uttering a denial about the adjoining room, but as the other man continued to stare at him, he knew his so-called anonymity had been exposed. _Thanks a lot, Cathy_ , he said, scowling slightly. Trying the same tactic now that he had tried with Daphne, he shrugged and said, "I just thought you could use some sleep and figured you hadn't had a chance to freshen up since you brought Gus in. The room wasn't being used, so I suggested to Cathy that she let you use it temporarily in the meantime; it wasn't that big a deal. And I had an extra tray left over for lunch and didn't want it to go to waste." There – that sounded quite plausible to his ears. Unfortunately as the other man smiled back at him enigmatically, Justin had the distinct feeling he wasn't buying it for a second.

 

"Well," Brian said, inching just a little closer until he could almost feel the other man's breath on his face. The closer he got to the blond, the more captivated he was becoming. Thinking he wouldn't mind seeing this man again, he said, "Actually, I don't want to leave my son's side until I know for sure he's completely out of the woods. So if the offer is still open, I wouldn't mind taking you up on it." He lifted his arm to take a sniff at his armpit and scrunched up his nose in distaste. "You wouldn't happen to have a spare deodorant down in the laundry room, too, would you? I'm beginning to get a little rank here."

 

Justin laughed softy, his voice coming out in a type of tinkling sound; Brian thought it was quite intriguing as the blond replied, "I'll see what I can scrounge up; you didn't like our foaming soap?" he asked, referring to the hospital-issued standard shower soap offered to their patients.

 

Brian snorted. "Not unless I'm auditioning to be Tropicana's mascot."

 

Justin grinned. The man was now standing so close to him, he could swear he could smell the fragrance on Brian's skin; he decided that whatever it was, the man didn't smell bad at all – in fact, he smelled pretty damn intoxicating from where he stood. "Well….I'll go get those clothes for you," he told the brunet, realizing he'd better leave before he blushed an even deeper shade of pink under the man's close stare.

 

He nodded in way of goodbye and prepared to turn around when he heard the man's seductive voice speaking his name again and he flushed at the sound. "Justin."

 

He lifted his eyes to stare back into the twinkling hazel eyes as Brian drawled, "Don't you want to know my measurements?"

 

Justin gulped and stared back at him stupidly. Did this gorgeous man just say what he thought he had said? _Mustn't look down…..mustn't look down_ , he kept repeating as he whispered, " _Measurements_?"

 

Brian's lips twitched into an amused smile. "Yes…..for the clothes."

 

Now Justin _did_ flush even darker with embarrassment. "Oh…..yeah – uh, what is it? I mean, uh, what is your pant and shirt size?" _Damn it - get a grip, Taylor_!, he berated himself as Brian pursed his lips together and grinned even more broadly back at him. Justin's heart skipped a beat at the look he was getting – was it just possible this man was flirting with him? Or was he just imagining what he _wanted_ to see?

 

Brian gave him his shirt and pants size as he watched Justin hurriedly jot the information down on a small white pad of paper he retrieved from his pants pocket. He surreptitiously took advantage of his situation to admire the long, golden eyelashes framing the pale face as the tip of the blond's tongue snaked out briefly to wet his lips. He knew that now wasn't the time to pursue this fascinating man – presently his son was his priority – but if his son continued to be on the mend and was, indeed, moved to a regular, private room tomorrow, he hoped eventually that he could get to know this intriguing man better – _much_ better…..

 

Justin nodded self-consciously as he closed the notebook and lifted his eyes to meet Brian's. "I'll go see what I can find," he promised as he placed the pencil and pad back into his pocket and turned to go. "I'll be back as soon as I can…but I may have to run some more hospital errands first."

 

Brian nodded as Justin began to walk away, pausing momentarily to admire the retreating view for a few moments before he returned back to Gus' room.

 

Justin inhaled a shaky breath and blew it out once he had put enough of a safe distance between him and the other man. At that moment, he realized Daphne was right – he _did_ have a crush on the elegant, sexy man. He only hoped he knew what he was getting himself into as he quickly rushed to catch the employee freight elevator that would take him to the basement laundry area. He knew that whatever this situation wrought, though, it was sure to be an extremely interesting one.

 


	7. Florence - Meet Elroy

"Who was that man, Brian?" Lindsay asked curiously as Brian came back into the room a few minutes later. Her friend's quick attempt to catch up with the other man, who appeared to be a hospital employee, hadn't gone unnoticed by either woman.

 

"His name is Justin," Brian told them as he took his customary seat back at Gus' side. "He's the one who helped take care of him when I brought him in last night, and he's also the one who arranged for me to use the room next door – and brought me some lunch earlier today."

 

"Well, I'd say he's certainly going above and beyond the call of duty, then – offering to find you a change of clothes, too?" Lindsay observed as she and Mel exchanged a knowing smile, both thinking the same thing – it was obvious to them by the way this blond had been looking at Brian that he was infatuated with him. They only hoped he didn't get his heart smashed like a fly when he found out Brian's standard one-fuck per customer policy that he held, but they couldn't police every vulnerable man's heart no matter how well-intentioned and kind they might be.

 

Brian shrugged. "It wasn't my idea," he maintained. "I can't help it if I'm hot," he decided as Lindsay stifled a laugh and Mel merely rolled her eyes in disgust at his statement.

 

"That must be the reason," Lindsay murmured as she glanced down at their son to check on him. She hated the fact that she and Mel had been gone when he awakened earlier, but she was so thrilled to hear from Brian that he had, indeed, been awake again. That was definitely a promising sign. "If you ask me, I think someone has a crush on you."

 

Brian snorted, thinking that sounded so _high school_ to his ears. "Well, if he really likes me, maybe I'll give him my varsity jacket when we start going steady," he quipped. "Do you think he'll let me get to 3rd base, too?"

 

"Give me a fucking break, Brian," Mel finally growled from her side of the hospital bed. "There're more important matters here than satisfying your over-sized libido," she added curtly, staring down at their child intently. Both she and Lindsay had felt terribly guilty about not being at the hospital when their son had been brought in; that was mainly why she was acting so angry at Brian, but the man still annoyed the hell out of her with his constant innuendos.

 

"Gee, Mel, I never would have figured that out," Brian snarled back at her. "I guess I just brought Gus to the ER last night so he could take a tour when it wasn't so crowded."

 

"Brian…..Mel, _please_ ," Lindsay pleaded. "Can we call a recess at least until Gus is better?" She placed her fingers at her temples as if she was trying to ward off a migraine while she appealed to her partner and her friend.

 

Brian shook his head; Lindsay wasn't the _only_ one about to get a headache. He stood up and stretched as he leaned backward. Taking one more quick glance at his son to make sure he seemed okay for the moment, he stated, "I've got to get out of here for a little while."

 

Lindsay opened her mouth to say something, but quickly closed it as Brian turned on his heels and promptly walked out. She turned a disapproving stare at her partner. "Mel, do you always have to bait him like that? After all, he probably saved Gus' life."

 

The brunet huffed. "I can't help it with him – he's always thinking with his dick instead of his _other_ head."

 

Lindsay shook her head. "Please….for my sake as well as our son's – just tone down the sarcasm and vitriolic diatribe until he's better and ready to go home, okay?"

 

Melanie couldn't help rolling her eyes at her partner's defense of Brian Kinney once again – the man who could apparently do no wrong. But she realized this was one case she _wasn't_ going to win. "Okay, okay, whatever," she grudgingly agreed.

 

Lindsay nodded, satisfied that at least for now her partner would tamp her objections down to a more civil level. She glanced up at the clock overhead their son's bed, noticing it was close to 5:00 p.m. She _also_ realized she and Mel hadn't eaten anything in several hours. "Mel…when Brian returns you want to run upstairs to the cafeteria and grab something to eat?" She asked. She continued to hold Gus' hand softly in her own, hoping he could somehow figure out by her touch that she was there by his side. Since Brian had brought him in, one of them had always been there by his bed and she was not going to make an exception now.

 

Mel nodded with a soft smile, admitting, "Yeah…I could stand a little something myself." She surprised Lindsay by adding gruffly, "We could bring Brian something back if he wants."

 

The blond's eyebrows rose at that unexpected statement. She smiled appreciatively at her partner's attempt to be civil. "That'd be nice," she told her.

 

Brian placed his hands at his lower back and leaned back again to try and relieve some of the tension there. Between sitting in the uncomfortable, vinyl bed/chair and remaining practically immobile for hours on end, he was stiff as a board. At least he had been able to take a shower previously; he was convinced if he hadn't had the opportunity to take advantage of that particular luxury earlier, he would have been aching all over even worse than he was.

 

Thinking about his shower made him think about something– or some _one_ else: the blond orderly, Justin, that had been popping up frequently lately. Despite Justin's insistence that he was doing all of it simply as part of his job, Brian didn't buy that for a second; he had seen enough interested looks in his day to know when a man was attracted to him. Of course, with _his_ looks and his 'attributes,' there weren't many men – or women, for that matter – who weren't.

 

That didn't mean he was always interested in return, though, but with this particular man – now, he could _definitely_ find something useful for those long, slender fingers to do in addition to carrying around meal trays and bedding; something _much more_ interesting. For now, however, until he knew for sure that his son was definitely on the mend, he would merely have to be content with wishful thinking…..

 

* * *

 

_Same Time – Laundry Room_

 

Justin swiped his employee card and quietly opened the laundry room door; he was vastly relieved to find it unoccupied at the moment. Nearby, he spied racks and racks of newly-laundered clothing for various departments of the hospital, including the maintenance uniforms he was seeking.

 

He had been hoping with it being near dinner time that the two employees normally in charge of uniform inventory would be eating; he had been down here enough times, fetching clothing for new employees for orientation, to know they seemed to follow a distinctive pattern of arriving and leaving at certain times. Fortunately for him, the two men who normally manned this department were regular as clockwork. Today was no exception as he noticed the room was unoccupied.

 

Quickly walking over to the maintenance pants and shirts shrouded in clear plastic apparel wrap, he hurriedly began to search through the tags to locate the sizes that Brian had given him earlier. His face warmed at the recollection of his earlier meeting with the sexy father; he still felt embarrassed by his response to Brian asking him if he wanted his 'measurements.' Naturally, his vivid mind immediately honed in on just what part of Brian he wanted to 'measure." It didn't take much imagination to figure out that that particular body part would no doubt fall in the 'extra-large' category to which it belonged.

 

He muttered to himself over his idiocy; the man could obviously see through him instantly. He had to know he was attracted to him; hell, _anyone_ would have known. All they would have had to do was look into his face to find out. He shook his head in disgust; why in the world had he volunteered to find Brian a change of clothing? He wasn't the man's valet and he hadn't asked for such a favor. But it was too late now; he had already offered and the man was no doubt waiting for him to return.

 

He rapidly pushed the clothing around on the racks until he found a decent pair of dark-gray uniform pants and a navy-blue shirt fitting Brian's measurements; the shirt was emblazoned with a rectangular-sized name patch that said _Leroy_. Oh, brother, he thought – Brian definitely didn't look like a _Leroy_ to HIM; Adonis, maybe…..but _Leroy_? He smacked his head softly; could this get any worse?

 

"No way am I giving him a shirt with the name _Leroy_ on it," he vowed. Glancing around guiltily left and right to ensure no one was within sight of what he was about to do, he quickly grabbed the shirt and grasped the name tag, trying to frantically tear it off. The seamstress must have been a descendant of Betsy Ross, however, because it wouldn't budge. He would just have to find a pair of scissors lying around somewhere to take care of it; the longer he stayed in the laundry room, the more it was likely his subterfuge would be detected.

 

Feeling like he was a medical cat burglar, he quickly grabbed the items and rushed toward the door, hoping like hell that no one was about. Opening the door, he stuck his head out to double check, breathing a sigh of relief when he found the hallway vacant. As fast as he could while he had the chance, then, he hurried down the hallway toward the employee elevator. Before he entered, he made a quick pit stop nearby at the patient supply closet ( _armpit_ stop, he couldn't help joking to himself) to snag a small, mini-size stick of deodorant; at least, no one could say he didn't provide for the hospital's patients – or their fathers, for that matter, as he placed it in his pocket for safekeeping. Finally laden with his supplies, he walked out and over to the elevator, pressed the button and waited rather impatiently, as well as nervously, for the elevator to arrive.

 

As the car ascended shortly afterward, he tapped his foot restlessly on the worn floor, still wondering if he had lost his mind in agreeing to help out this virtual stranger. The man was probably the most magnificent male specimen he had ever had the privilege of encountering; the hospital was the _last_ place he expected to find someone like Brian Kinney. Maybe the French Riviera, or Paris, or Los Angeles; but the emergency room at the Children's Hospital in Pittsburgh? What in the world did he think he was _doing_? He had to admit, though; he was finding the whole thing rather exhilarating in a weird sort of way. He still had this feeling that it would somehow blow up in his face, though.

 

The more time he had to think about it, the more he felt like he was definitely out of his league here. He shook his head, deciding it would be best to just give the man his clothing and go back to his job duties; Brian Kinney would be out of his life as soon as his son recovered and left the hospital. Once the little boy was all better, the man would have no more need for his services. He sighed; that was just what he was, too – a _servant;_ an _orderly_ ; a _peon_ in the pecking order of gay men.

 

Reaching the main floor housing the ICU, he disembarked and turned right to head down to Room #7 – the room containing a little boy, two women, and one tired, clean, but slightly sweaty, sexy man. He could feel his pulse quicken just a bit at the thought of encountering _him_ again, but he had promised and he always fulfilled his promises, no matter _how_ nerve wracking it might prove to be.

 

Caught in his daydreaming about a certain brunet who had been occupying quite a bit of his thoughts lately, he rounded the corner to hurry toward the ICU wing, and ran smack into a hard, chiseled tower of steel; the very man he had been spending way too many moments thinking about lately.

 

The breath was knocked out of him and the clothes went flying to the floor as two hands quickly grasped his upper arms to steady him; that was probably a good thing because as he gazed into the inquisitive hazel orbs intently staring down at him and his eyes slowly lowered to take in the full, dark-pink lips that looked just dandy for all _sorts_ of pleasurable activities, if he had had any breath left at the moment, all of it would have been taken away anyway.

 

Brian's mouth twisted up into a smirk. "Nice of you to _drop_ in with my clothes, Florence Nightingale," he drawled as he gazed amused into the wide-open eyes of his captive. He glanced down at the pile of clothing and plastic wrap lying rather crumpled on the floor and his eye caught a small stick of deodorant propped up against the floorboard. "My, my, my….aren't you just the most thoughtful _personal assistant_ around; you even found me some deodorant?" His smile broadened at the blond's obvious look of embarrassment as he murmured, "You want to take a sniff to see if I need it?"

 

Justin squirmed as Brian continued to hold onto his upper arms. Brian Kinney, up close and personal, was even more formidable than from a few feet away. "Uh….no…..that's okay," he stuttered, berating himself silently for sounding like an idiot again. What was it about this man that made him DO that? Never mind, he didn't have to answer that – all he had to do was _look_ at the man – and feel his strong hands holding onto him to know the answer.

 

Brian laughed softly. "Well, if you're sure. I was just taking a short walk to _relieve_ some of my _stiffness_. You wouldn't have any cures for that, would you, Nurse?" he asked innocently, his eyes twinkling in mischief as he watched Justin's eyes widen even more at his question.

 

Justin huffed. "First of all, I'm not a _nurse_. And second of all, if you're… _stiff_ …..ask the REAL nurse to bring you some Ben Gay – that would probably be appropriate!" And with that, Justin pulled himself free from the other man's grasp and bent down to pick up the clothes lying on the floor; he flushed a deep shade of pink as he realized the 'view' Brian must be enjoying as he leaned over to retrieve the small stick of deodorant nearby. He swore he could practically feel the other man's eyes boring into him as he abruptly stood back up and twirled around, finding the other man smiling back at him with his eyebrows raised in challenge.

 

"Here!" Justin said, thrusting the clothing and deodorant into the man's hands, his eyes flashing. "When you're done with them, just throw them into the clothes hamper – _Leroy!"_ As Justin stomped off down the hallway, Brian frowned. _Leroy?_ Where did _that_ come from? As Justin disappeared out of sight, however, and he had a chance to pull up the plastic covering the shirt, he laughed out loud. "Touché, _Florence_ ," he murmured with a smile as he watched him go. He turned in the opposite direction back toward Gus' room, feeling just a bit more optimistic and more like himself than he had in quite a while. He glanced back toward where Justin had gone. "I'm not done with you yet, Florence," he promised with a wisp of a smile as he finally turned to walk back down the hall toward the ICU.

 

Lindsay looked up as she saw her friend returning, noticing a smile on his face. "I take it that's your new wardrobe?" she asked, amused at him holding up two wire coat hangers with the maintenance outfit sheathed underneath; apparently the blond orderly who was infatuated with him had followed through on his promise. She watched as Brian began to take his own shirt off, preparing to change into the other outfit.

 

"Do you mind, Brian?" Mel couldn't help grousing. "Not everyone gets aroused by your male presence," she retorted dryly. She tilted her head toward the side. "There's a bathroom there for a reason."

 

Brian shook his head in disgust. "I doubt if you get aroused by _anything_ ," he muttered as he grabbed the clean clothes and sauntered over to the bathroom, closing it firmly behind him.

 

"Mel, honestly," Lindsay murmured in entreaty as Brian left. "You promised," she pointed out.

 

Mel shook her head. "He just really pisses me off," he snapped. "He excels at it."

 

Lindsay sighed. "We all have to try and get along for Gus' sake, okay? Hopefully he'll be moved to a private room tomorrow and we'll be able to spread out a little more. Please try and just deal with it in the meantime, okay?"

 

Mel rolled her eyes. "Okay….I'll try. But I'm not promising anything."

 

Brian quickly changed from his designer clothes into the cotton work pants and shirt, blaring his new pseudo name. He shook his head in amusement. "No offense, Leroy, but I think we'll have to do a little bit of custom tailoring on _this_ outfit, too," he declared. He wasn't sure if they kept all the scissors out of the reach of all the patients or not, but come hell or high water, he wasn't going to be christened with that moniker.

 

As he stood back from the rather small vanity mirror, though, 'Leroy's' shirt hanging open, he had to admit; at least the pants and shirt fit. And it felt damn good to have his stinky, sweaty clothes removed at last. He reached for the Lilliputian-sized stick of deodorant and pulled the tiny top off. "You've got to be kidding," he snorted as he reached under his left arm and tried with limited success to rub some of the deodorant there. "Baby powder," he muttered. "He would have to get me the baby-powder scent."

 

He finally managed to apply enough of the deodorant to both underarms and promptly threw the small item into the nearby trash can. Buttoning the shirt up partway and tucking it into his pants, he balled up his clothes and opened the door.

 

Lindsay's head rose to look at him as he reentered the room. "Leroy?" she asked, her mouth twisting up in amusement as Brian walked over to the closet to open it, locating a white, hospital-issued plastic bag for carrying personal items and promptly stuffing his dirty clothes into it. He hung the drawstring bag on one of the metal clothes hooks inside and shut the door. "Hey, I had no control over whose identity I stole," he reported, shrugging. "Has anyone seen a pair of scissors around?"

 

Lindsay chuckled. "I think I saw the nurse put a pair in the drawer over there," she reported, nodding her head toward the small dresser built into the wall. Brian walked over and pulled out the top drawer, relieved to find a small, metal pair of scissors nestled inside. He reached up to grab them and in short order, 'Leroy' was just a distant memory as he discarded the patch in the trash.

 

"Rest in peace, Leroy," he quipped as he walked over and once more sat down next to his son's bed. As he reached over to take his son's hand, he felt a barely perceptible movement as he clutched it and his head jerked up in surprise. "Gus?" he whispered. "Can you hear me?" Brian looked over at the two women. "I just felt his hand move a little," he explained.

 

The two women anxiously stared down at their child as Brian continued speaking. "Come on, Sonny Boy! You've been asleep long enough! Time to wake up!" he ordered softly. "Your moms are here with me. Come on, Gus – wake up, Buddy!" he urged.

 

Lindsay gasped as they watched Gus' eyelids fluttering while he struggled to wake up. She squeezed his other hand softly. "Come on, Sweetie, can you wake up for Mommy?" she encouraged him, reaching over to stroke his now-cooled forehead. "Wake up, Honey," she insisted.

 

"Come on, Baby," Mel said, leaning over the bed railing to add her voice to her partner's. "Wake up so we can talk to you."

 

Brian couldn't take his eyes off his son as he watched him continue to try and awaken from his slumber. "Come on, Sonny Boy," he pleaded softly. "Wake up and talk to Daddy."

 

Finally, glimpses of brown began to appear beneath the miniature, long lashes and Gus slowly opened his eyes, blinking a couple of times before at last they remained open and _stayed_ open to everyone's delight.

 

Brian couldn't erase the huge smile that instantly appeared on his face as Gus turned his head slightly at the sound of his father's voice. "That's my big boy," he cooed at his son, reaching over to touch the boy's cheek. "I knew you could do it." He could see his child's lips moving, trying to speak.

 

"Shh," he responded, reaching up to stroke his son's bangs. "Don't try and talk right now, Buddy. You just lie there and rest. You've been really sick, but you're going to get all better now."

 

A movement at the door caught the parents' attention as Daphne entered the room and smiled at the sight before her. "He's awake!" she cried out in delight. "That's great!" She walked over to the side of the bed where the two women were as Mel and Lindsay pulled back slightly to make room for her.

 

"I need to check him out for a couple of minutes now that he's conscious," she told them. "Would you mind moving back over there for just a little bit so I can take a look?"

 

The two women nodded as they pulled back a few feet to watch the young female doctor speak softly to their son; they were impressed by her gentle tone of voice and the caring expression on her face. It was obvious that this young resident doctor genuinely loved what she did as she held her stethoscope against Gus' small chest and explained to him what she was doing. They heard her apologize softly as Gus jumped slightly at the cold impression of the instrument against his skin. "Sorry, little man," she said to him with a smile. "Have to check out your heart and make sure it's getting all better."

 

Brian watched the brown-haired woman carefully check his son's heartbeat, pulse, temperature, and blood pressure and flip through his chart of progress over the past several hours. He was thrilled that during the entire encounter, his son had remained awake this time. "You're doing great, Sonny Boy," he told his son with a tender smile. "Daddy's so glad to see you're awake finally."

 

He turned his gaze upward as the young doctor wrote a few lines on his son's chart to ask, "Is he definitely on the mend now?"

 

Daphne smiled at him. "Well, I have to leave the final consensus up to Dr. Broderick, but all the signs are looking really good." She smiled down at her patient. "I have a good feeling that he'll be able to move to a private room tomorrow morning, but the final decision's up to him."

 

Brian smiled in relief. "Thanks, doctor," he told her in genuine gratitude. His boy meant the world to him; he hadn't realized just how deeply he loved him until he had been afraid he would lose him.

 

She nodded and smiled at him and then the two women. "I'll let Dr. Broderick know the results of my exam; he should be in shortly to confer with you about whether he can be moved tomorrow. But I really think it looks promising for him."

 

"Thank you, doctor," Lindsay told her also. "That's wonderful news."

 

The young resident nodded with a smile before looking down at her young patient who was staring up at her curiously. "Nice to finally meet you, Gus," she said. "I'll see you again soon, okay?" She gave him a tender smile and nodded once more at the three parents before quietly turning to go.

 

As she walked out into the hallway, she finally burst out laughing. She had spied the suave, elegant man's rather unusual choice of wardrobe and somehow she knew; she had no doubt where the man's attire had come from. _You've got it bad, Justin_ , she said to herself. _You've got it REALLY bad….._ She had never seen her friend go to such lengths to help out a patient's father before, but then again, she had never seen one quite like Mr. Kinney. Smiling to herself, she hurried down the hallway toward her next patient, vowing silently to do what she could to help her friend become better acquainted with the sexy father.

 


	8. Anybody Need a Little CPR?

_Next Morning_ – _11:00 a.m._

 

“Justin!” Daphne called out to her friend as she spied him coming out of the men’s restroom nearby.  “Just the person I was looking for.” 

 

Justin smiled at his friend warmly.  “Seems like we were just here, doesn’t it?” he commented dryly.  “Actually, knowing your schedule, you probably never left here.”

 

Daphne scrunched up her nose and grimaced.  “That’s not far from the truth – I think I actually got four whole hours of sleep this time, though,” she added.

 

“Oh, well, I stand corrected; you’re a lady of leisure then,” Justin kidded her, shaking his head.  “I still don’t know how you do it – you must be able to run on adrenaline alone – and pizza,” he added, grinning.  “Did you need me for something?”

 

“Yeah…There’s a patient being moved up here from the ICU in about thirty minutes – normally, I’d just go through the proper channels and schedule the room to be prepared on the next round of housekeeping changes, but……”

 

“But there’s no time to do it the ‘normal’ way, so you want me to hurry and get it ready now,” Justin answered for her as Daphne grinned and nodded.

 

“Would you mind?  We can’t move the patient until the room’s ready and we really could use the extra bed down in the ICU.”

 

Justin smiled.  “No problem – I’ll go get the bedding and other supplies right now and make sure it’s ready for you.”

 

“Thanks, Justin, you’re a lifesaver,” she said gratefully.  As her friend turned to leave, she said, “Hey….pizza at the normal time and place today?”

 

He nodded.  “Sounds good – I’ll see you at Roberto’s at one.” 

 

As her friend walked away Daphne grinned, thinking that if her job didn’t pan out as a medical doctor she could go into acting.  “That should be just about right,” she thought with a smile as she turned to head toward the nurses’ station to prepare for her patient’s transfer from the ICU to a regular room.  She hoped Justin followed through on readying the room promptly, because unbeknownst to him, the patient was about to be moved quicker than he thought.  “I guess he’ll just have to still be there when a certain someone shows up,” she said to herself, snickering.  “I’ve done my part; the rest is up to you, my friend.”

 

 

_Same Time – ICU_

Brian had a feeling right now that he probably looked like a total idiot, but honestly he didn’t care; he just couldn’t stop smiling at his son.  His _fully awake_ , _conscious_ son.  For so long he had been afraid to build his hopes up regarding his son’s recovery; it wasn’t that he didn’t want that with every fiber of his being.  It just seemed for so long like it might not happen.  For hours he had sat at his son’s bedside, holding his hand and watching him breathing, lying deathly still and looking so frail as he waited for some kind of sign that he would make it.  For hours he had stared at the child that meant more to him than he had ever thought possible, actually praying to a God he wasn’t even sure existed that his child would recover. 

 

Now as he watched his child about to be moved to a private room, signaling the doctor’s belief that his son was well on his way to a full recovery, he felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted from his shoulders.  Gus was still a little drowsy and he was only able to be fed occasional ice chips for the time being, but he was getting out of the ICU.  He was awake, actually turning his head to look at him and his two mothers.  And he was so much more alert now; the difference was both startling and heartwarming as he smiled down at his miracle and Gus actually eyed him back with just the wisp of a familiar, innocent smile. 

 

“We’re going to take you for a little trip, Sonny Boy, right in your own bed, okay?” he tenderly told his son.  “It’ll be just like going for a ride.”  His heart leapt as the child nodded his head slightly in response.  Brian looked over at the two moms; both had tears in their eyes and he knew they were all thinking the same thing – they were all realizing just how lucky they were. 

 

Cathy McDonald, the head ICU nurse, stood just inside the room and signaled to the two male nurses’ aides that it was okay to move the patient as they grasped either end of the bed and began to wheel Gus slowly out of the room.  Brian challenged each of the men to object to him holding onto his son’s hand as he gave them a determined look that told them he wasn’t backing down; receiving no objection to his silent command, he walked alongside his son’s bed as the two women kept pace with him on the other side.  “Here we go, Sonny Boy,” Brian said, grinning down at his son.  “Time for you to take a little tour.”

 

 

 

Justin smoothed down the thin, white cotton blanket over the bed and carefully placed the nondescript pillow on top.  He knew it was just another hospital bed with the same old sheets, blanket and pillow washed hundreds and hundreds of times over and over again.  But each patient was unique; each child was here in a strange, scary place far from home.  He figured the least he could do was try and make them as comfortable as possible during their stay. 

 

Just like he always did when he finished preparing the room, he reached inside a plastic bag he kept handy that hung from the cart and pulled out one of the small stuffed animals inside.  Placing a small, furry beige-colored kitten on the center of the bed like a sort of greeting card, he smiled in satisfaction as he reached over to grasp his rolling cart and leave.  He figured he had at least ten minutes before the patient arrived and he needed to get ready to deliver the lunchroom meals.

 

He was somewhat surprised to hear the familiar sound of a hospital bed being wheeled into the room as he glanced up at the door; Daphne had led him to believe he had thirty minutes before the patient was due to arrive here from the ICU.  His surprise at seeing the patient being transported into the room, however, was nothing compared to the feeling he felt about the man who was walking in with him.  It was _him_ ; the man who had been occupying a great deal of his thoughts lately.  It was Brian, aka _Leroy_.  

 

Brian’s brows shot up as he noticed Justin standing in Gus’ new room; it seemed his own little Florence Nightingale was not only one hot package, but he was also omnipresent as well.  He smiled in pleasure as his Welcome Wagon eyed him back intently, appearing shocked to see him again so soon.

 

“Hey, Justin,” one of the nurses’ aides said to the blond as they came in with their patient.  “Everything ready for this little guy?”

 

Justin couldn’t help continuing to stare at Brian instead of the aides as he addressed the other man and nodded.  “Uh, yeah….I just got done, actually.”  He frowned.  “The doctor told me I would have thirty minutes before you got here.”  He felt his pulse speed up a little as Gus’ father twisted his mouth into what looked like a smug smile as he found himself tripping over his own words.  _Damn the man_ , he couldn’t help thinking.  _Someone’s enjoying this…._  

 

Brad, the nurses’ aide who had greeted him, nodded.  “Yeah, they’re always messing up the schedule,” he told him congenially as the two men slowed Gus’ portable hospital bed and braked it into place next to Gus’ permanent bed.  Justin reached down and pulled the sheet and blanket back as, on the count of three, the two aides gingerly lifted Gus and placed him onto the new bed.  Justin quietly placed the stuffed kitten to the side of the pillow and gently covered the little boy’s body with the sheet and blanket as a pair of large, brown eyes stared up at him.  “Hey, Buddy,” he whispered tenderly with a reassuring smile.  “Glad to see you’re finally awake.”  He picked up the stuffed animal again and tentatively held it out to the little boy.  Gus eyed him a little nervously until a few seconds later he reached up with his hands and shyly accepted the small toy with a slight smile, gently cradling it to his chest like a furry security blanket.

 

“A nurse will be in shortly to hook up all the IVs and the monitor,” Brad told the group present in the room before the two aides turned silently and left.

 

From his position next to his son’s bed, Brian had watched in fascination as Justin greeted his son with such tenderness in his voice.  He could tell Justin wasn’t just there at the hospital for a job; he really did care about the children that were being treated; there was no way he could be faking that look of compassion shining through on his face.  He found that his respect for the man was rising even higher the more he was around him; he couldn’t help the lesbionic thought that crept into his mind that this man was as beautiful on the inside as he was on the outside, and the fact that it was his son who was benefiting from the man’s care only made him more impressed.

 

The intense looks passing between the two men did not go unnoticed by Mel and Lindsay, who exchanged a knowing look.  It was always easy to tell when Brian was attracted to a potential new trick, and this young, handsome orderly obviously was next on his list.  They actually felt sorry for the young man because they knew Brian wasn’t capable of anything more than just playing with him briefly before he discarded him just like all the others.  It was a shame, too, because this man seemed so decent and from what Brian had told them, he had treated Gus very compassionately when he had first been brought in.  And the stuffed animal their son was now clutching as a sort of lifeline meant more to them than he probably knew.  This man was special, and he deserved to be treated that way.

 

“Uh, Justin?” Lindsay said softly, wanting to let the orderly know how much they appreciate what he had done.

 

The blond’s attention was finally broken as he turned to face the woman addressing him.  “Yes?” he said softly.

 

“We really didn’t get a chance to meet formally before,” she explained with a slight smile.  “I’m Lindsay Peterson and this is my partner, Melanie Marcus.”

 

Justin nodded.  “You’re Gus’ moms.”  He said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

 

She nodded back at him.  “Yes.  I just wanted to thank you for helping to take care of Gus.  Brian told me how patient and gentle you’ve been with him and we appreciate that more than you could ever know.”

 

Justin tried to hide his surprise over that statement.  Brian had been talking to them about him?  He smiled a little self-consciously, actually pleased by that thought but not wanting Brian to know.  “I was just doing my job,” he told them politely with a shy smile.

 

“I think it was more than that,” Melanie spoke up, her voice uncharacteristically choking up as she thought about what might have happened to their son.  “It means a lot to us that you helped Gus to get better.  He means the world to us.” 

 

Justin flushed at the attention as he glanced over at Brian, who was silently staring at him thoughtfully from his place next to Gus’ bed.  “I’m just glad I could help him,” he said simply, his eyes locked on the hazel ones. 

 

“Well, we really appreciate it, Justin,” Lindsay told him warmly as Melanie nodded in agreement.

 

He smiled at them.  “Thanks,” he said simply.

 

“Did you do that?” Justin suddenly heard Brian saying from his son’s bedside.

 

“What?” Justin asked, turning to look at the brunet in puzzlement over his cryptic inquiry.

 

“The kitten.  Was that your idea?”

 

Justin looked down self-consciously as if he had been found with his hand in the cookie jar.  “It’s just a little something I do to try and help the younger patients feel a little more comfortable.” He glanced up finally to meet Brian’s eyes.  “It’s nothing.”  He smiled sheepishly.  “I normally find them secondhand at garage sales or the flea market.  It’s surprising what people will sell so cheaply, and some of them still have the tags on them.”  He hastened to add lest they worry, “I always wash them first before I give them out, though.”

 

Brian laughed softly at the thought of Justin being a sort of sexy washerwoman; it was a sound Justin hadn’t heard yet and he found it quite intriguing.  “You’re very inventive, Florence Nightingale, you know that?” 

 

Justin flushed at both the compliment as well as the cutesy moniker as he looked over in embarrassment at the two women who were eyeing both men in puzzlement over their odd conversation.  “I…I’d better get going,” he quickly said, suddenly feeling awkward.  “I have to get back to work.”  He nodded politely at the two women before saying, “It was nice meeting you; I’m very glad Gus is going to be okay.”

 

Both women whispered their thanks in return as with one more cursory glance and slight nod at Brian, Justin grasped his wheeled bedding and supply cart and began to walk out of the room.

 

Brian didn’t quite know why, but he knew he just couldn’t let Justin walk out of there without talking to him some more.  He was realizing that lately the blond was becoming as important to him as breathing.  He glanced down at his son, who was still clutching the stuffed kitten, and told him softly, “Daddy will be right back, okay Sonny Boy?”  The little boy nodded as Brian reached down to place a brief kiss on his forehead and brush some hair back from his face before he rose and walked quickly toward the door.

 

“Hey…..Florence!” he called out softly as he noticed Justin walking down the hall, the wheeled cart making a soft creaking sound as it moved.  He watched Justin slow and then stop, turning around to face him as he held on tightly to the stainless steel cart.

 

“I wish you’d quit calling me that!” Justin retorted softly from his place in the hall, not wanting to disturb any of the patients unnecessarily.  He knew the word ‘quiet’ and ‘hospital’ didn’t quite go together – there was always too much hustle and bustle going on there to call the atmosphere quiet – but he tried to speak softly when he could as a small attempt at helping to make the young patients’ stay just a little less stressful and alien to them.

 

Brian slowly walked up to face him from a few feet away.  “You don’t like the name Florence?” Brian asked innocently, his lips curled under as he stared into Justin’s eyes with a definite gleam of amusement.  “Would you prefer Candy instead?”  Brian silently had to agree – this man was certainly eye candy of the most delicious kind to _him_ ….

 

Justin shook his head in bewilderment.  “Candy?”

 

“You know…as in _candy striper_.  They do still have those kinds of people in these places, don’t they?”

 

Justin huffed in irritation as he rolled his eyes and sighed.  “Yes,” he retorted as if he were talking to a petulant brat.  “They still exist,” he verified.  “But I don’t like Candy any better than Florence.  Justin will do just fine, thank you.”

 

Brian’s eyes twinkled as his face broke out into a pleased smile.  “Justin,” he practically purred as he walked a little closer to intrude further into the blond’s personal space.  He noticed the younger man’s eyes widening as he approached closer and he fleetingly wondered if they were reacting that way due to fear or, hopefully, attraction.  “I like that name best of all,” he whispered huskily as his eyes lowered to dwell on the dark pink, oh-so-kissable lips.  He felt his cock stirring at the thought of that mouth worshiping him in his bed and how damned sexy the pale skin would look on top of his navy-blue duvet as the blond’s naked body lay draped across his, sucking and licking on his balls and cock until he was arching with pleasure.  Somehow, he just knew this man would be perfect for him in every way…..

 

“Are you listening to me?” he suddenly heard as he reluctantly snapped out of his tantalizing daydream.  His gaze rose to take in the sapphire-blue eyes now staring back at him in aggravation.  “Did you hear one word of what I just said?”

 

Brian smiled, thoroughly enjoying their rather odd conversation.  “No,” he admitted.  “I was engrossed in much more _pleasurable_ matters.”  He was rewarded with the pale face flushing in response to his intense look and felt an indescribable thrill at the reactions he was getting from the other man.

 

“I was asking what you wanted,” Justin said as he kept a white-knuckled grasp on the rolled handle of the cart.  He wasn’t sure if he was doing it because he needed to leave soon or, perhaps more truthfully, he was keeping the cart between him and Brian for his own protection.

 

“Oh,” Brian said casually.  “I just needed to ask you something before you go.”

 

Justin stood there, his heart beating with anxiety.  He felt like some teenager wondering if he was about to be asked to go to the school dance.  He felt his palms getting sweaty as he fought to control his emotions before he responded.  What could this man need from _him_?  He tried hard not to get his hopes up as he asked, “What exactly do you need?”

 

Brian bit back the thought that immediately rose to his mind.  _If you only knew, Justin Taylor……if you only knew._ But unfortunately what he wanted to do most of would have to wait until Gus was a little better.  For now, though, that didn’t mean he couldn’t have a little fun in the meantime….

 

“I was interested in learning more about _mouth-to-mouth-resuscitation_ ,” he said, licking his lips again this time more slowly, as he watched Justin’s eyes widen in that wonderfully mesmerizing way and the blond’s face flush once again.  He so enjoyed getting this man riled up.  “Would you be able to recommend someone for that?” He asked innocently, raising his eyebrows in question as he wanted expectantly for a response.

 

Justin felt his pulse quickening at the thought of just what it would feel like to be this man’s own personal, mouth-to-mouth ‘instructor;’ somehow, though, he didn’t think the man had any need for any type of remedial training. 

 

His eyes seemed to have a mind of their own as they lowered almost instinctively to study the other man’s cranberry-colored lips that were slightly parted as he waited for his reply.  He cursed himself as he flushed once more and raised his eyes nervously to look into the other man’s face; he knew this man was baiting him and from the smug expression he was receiving, he was thoroughly enjoying it.  Fuck, he wanted this man so badly – he had never met anyone like him before.  He was almost larger than life and he had a sneaking suspicion that he definitely _was_ ‘large’ in all the right places…..But he was damned if this man thought he was going to play the dutiful little scared church mouse at his expense.  He _did_ have at least a modicum of dignity left…..well…….yes, he did……didn’t he?  

 

He wasn’t quite sure where he got the courage to finally retort, “Well, part of my pre-employment training involved CPR, but I’m afraid my schedule’s full right now, _Mr. Kinney,_ because my skills are always in demand _._ If you want to check back with me later, though, maybe I can try and _squeeze_ you in.”

 

Brian actually laughed out loud at his response, surprised and delighted by his impertinence.  He had never had to work so hard at capturing his prey, but for some reason, this was different.  It was more intense, more emotional.  It was downright invigorating.  Well, two could play this game, he decided.

 

“I don’t know, _Justin_ ,” he said huskily as he stared into the captivating blue eyes.  “How do I know what your skill level _is_?”   

 

Justin could feel his heart pounding.  He marveled silently at how he could actually be flirting with this dangerously sexy man in the middle of a busy hospital and no one else seemed to notice.  He knew, however, that he couldn’t stay here much longer – there would be others looking for him and it was close to lunchtime when he would be expected to deliver the meal trays.

 

He gazed up into the inquisitive, darkening hazel eyes just before he took a breath of courage and said, “You’ll just have to find out then, won’t you…… _Leroy_?”  Doing the smirking himself, he quickly turned, cart and all, and hurried down the hallway before Brian could notice his hands shaking as a result of his brazenness. 

 

He couldn’t leave fast enough, though, to avoid hearing Brian’s amused chuckle echoing off the halls as he departed.

 

“Yeah, I guess I just will,” Brian said softly to himself as he enjoyed the disappearing view.  “You can count on it.”


	9. I'm Just Doing My Job, Aren't I?

_1:10 p.m. – Roberto's Restaurant_

 

"Ah, the busy doctor," Justin called out as Daphne rushed in. "Only ten minutes late this time – a new record," he added dryly as he grinned at her and she slid into the opposite side of the booth with an apologetic smile.

 

"Hey, you should feel lucky," she retorted facetiously. "I almost didn't get out of the hospital at all. A kid came in with a broken arm at the last minute, and I thought I was going to have to take care of it down in the ER. Fortunately one of the other doctors took pity on me and said he'd do it instead." She frowned. "Must have been because he couldn't hear the patient's heartbeat over my stomach growling!"

 

Justin snorted. "That I can believe!" He grinned over at her. "I already ordered our usual, by the way – hope that's okay."

 

She nodded. "Any food is good with me at the moment. I'm starved!"

 

Justin grinned. "I thought as much," he said a little smugly. He never had to worry about his friend being hungry; that was one more thing they had in common….

 

Daphne's eyes sparkled animatedly as a thought suddenly occurred to her. "I almost forgot! Did you hear who got moved to a private room this morning?" She twisted one side of her mouth upward innocently, but it wasn't long before Justin saw right through her.

 

"Yes, I did, Doctor.  That's exactly what I wanted to discuss with you."

 

Daphne's brows rose. "What are you talking about?"

 

Justin huffed. " _You're_ the doctor who told me to get that room ready immediately, because you knew who the patient would be!" He shook his head incredulously. "You did that on purpose!"

 

Daphne looked at her friend as if he had been sniffing too much laughing gas. "I have no idea what in the world you're talking about." She was able to maintain a serious expression on her face for several seconds while Justin glared back at her before her face broke out into a wide smile and she laughed.

 

Justin gasped. "You _did!_ You deliberately told them to move him ahead of time, knowing that I would still be there getting the room ready when he came in, didn't you?"

 

Daphne grinned at her friend's indignant expression. "Okay, I confess. You got me."

 

"I knew it! You're trying to play matchmaker again, aren't you? I can't believe you!"

 

Daphne shrugged at him as their waitress came over and placed their pizza down in front of them; she nodded briefly at them before walking away to leave them alone once more. "Why not? I can tell, Justin Taylor – you've really got it bad for him!"

 

"I do not!" Justin retorted defensively. "I _work_ at the hospital, remember? It's my job to prepare the rooms for new patients, no matter _who_ the fathers are!" He reached over somewhat angrily with his plate to slide a piece of the pizza onto it and chomp down hard on a large bite as he stared over at her in irritation.

 

"Uh, huh," Daphne responded as she, too, reached over with the spatula and slid a piece of the pizza onto her own plate. "And I suppose that includes finding him a clean change of clothes, too, from the laundry commissary? And a room next door to his son's to sleep in? And an extra lunch tray?" She peered over at him in triumph as her friend's face promptly turned a deep shade of pink in confirmation. "By the way, he's definitely single, you know," she sing-songed as she took a large bite of her pizza and grinned over at him, her eyes twinkling mischievously.

 

Justin groaned but inside his pulse was quickening over that revelation. He knew Brian wasn't involved with the two mothers, at least in any romantic way, but that still didn't mean a man that gorgeous didn't have someone on the side; it _did_ help to know for sure, though, that he considered himself unattached, at least legally anyway. "And just how do you know that, Doctor?" he asked suspiciously as he suddenly realized how Daphne must have found out.

 

She smiled. "Oh, we doctors have our ways." She waggled her eyebrows at Justin. "I think someone's a little curious about you, too."

 

Justin blushed. "And just how did you reach that conclusion? I thought you were a medical doctor, not a psychic."

 

Daphne took another bite of her pizza. "Don't need to be psychic or have a PhD to see what _I_ see," she stated matter-of-factly. "All I have to do is watch the way he looks at you when he thinks no one is noticing."

 

Justin averted his eyes away from his friend's intense stare. The darn girl always _did_ have keen observation skills as a doctor; apparently she didn't use them just for clinical purposes, though. Was she correct? Did Brian really have feelings for him, too, or was he just a convenient diversion for him now that his son appeared to be on the mend?

 

He could never be sure just what Brian's intentions were toward him. One minute he was flirting with him, and the next minute he acted like he was just another employee doing his bidding. He did know one thing, however; the man was just too damn sexy and dangerous for his own good. He had never quite met anyone as forceful and dominating a presence as Brian Kinney, and it scared the shit out of him while exciting him at the same time.

 

He adopted a nonchalant attitude as he replied in between bites of pepperoni, "Far be it for me to question your powers of observation, Daphne, but I think you're reading a little too much into things here."

 

But Daphne was not to be swayed. "I guess we'll just have to see, now won't we? I think that boy's going to need a lot of attention in the next week."

 

Justin nodded. "Yeah….but it's great that he's apparently going to be okay, though; he's seems like a really great kid."

 

Daphne beamed as her eyes twinkled. "Yes, he is…but I was talking about his _father_." She deftly ducked as Justin promptly threw a breadstick at her and they both laughed.

 

"So what's your schedule for next week?" she asked him. "If you want, I can find out what time a certain patient is scheduled for his diagnostic tests so you can be the one to wheel him down to x-ray."

 

Justin shook his head in amusement. "You never quit, do you?" He picked at the small salad next to his dinner plate as he advised her, "I hate to mess up your matchmaking schedule, _Dr. Chanders_ , but I'm actually working only one shift next week; I may have to carry on as best I can without your _manipulations_ of the schedule to my benefit. Next week is spring break so I decided to work just the 1st shift for a change," he explained. "I've got some art projects I need to focus on."

 

"But what if Mr. Gorgeous has to go back to work? You'll be on opposite schedules then."

 

Justin snorted. "Will you quit already? Enough, Daphne!" He appreciated her wanting to help, but her efforts were starting to perturb him just a bit. It was as if she thought he could only attract someone if she helped him. "Let's just drop it, okay?"

 

Her face fell slightly; she was so intent on matching these two men up; she could intrinsically feel the attraction between them. It wasn't that she didn't think Justin couldn't do it himself – he was beautiful both inside and out, and she knew he had to have his share of admirers. She just wasn't sure how much he would promote himself, though; sometimes he didn't realize how great he was. She would respect his wishes, though, but with a lot of reluctance. "Okay," she said with just a hint of disappointment.

 

Justin rolled his eyes. "Now don't go getting maudlin on me," he chided her. "I appreciate what you're trying to do. I just don't want you to feel like you need to run interference for me, that's all. I can take care of myself, okay?"

 

The brunette swirled a piece of breadstick around in some marinara sauce on her plate for a couple of seconds before lifting her gaze to stare back at him ruefully. "Okay," she agreed grudgingly. "But I still think he's an idiot if he doesn't…."

 

"Daphne," Justin said with just a hint of exasperation as he smiled over at her. "Enough. Let's hurry up and finish up our pizza and maybe we'll have just enough time to hit the ice cream shop down the street before we head back to work."

 

She grinned over at him. "You know my weak spot," she teased. "You've got a deal."

 

* * *

 

 

_Monday Morning – 8:00 a.m._

 

"That's my boy," Lindsay cooed to her son as he sucked on a straw to drink some of his water. "You're doing so well, Sweetheart!" She grinned over at Mel, both women so delighted that Gus was doing better almost by the hour. He was so much more alert now, and his upper body was actually propped up slightly in bed as he slowly sipped some water from a plastic cup. In fact, he was progressing so well the doctor had proclaimed that he was definitely out of the woods now and advised that he could have a soft meal this morning for the first time since he had been brought into the ER a few days ago.

 

He was doing so much better that Lindsay had been able, with the doctor's help, to convince Brian to finally go home early this morning to his loft and catch some much-needed shuteye. He had indicated when he left that he would be back, probably in the afternoon, to visit with Gus after running over to Kinnetik to check in with them briefly.

 

"I'm glad I was able to talk Brian into going home for a while," Lindsay told her partner softly. "He was absolutely exhausted."

 

Mel nodded rather distractedly as she reached over to the side of the bed to retrieve the stuffed kitten that the orderly, Justin, had left for their son yesterday. Since he had first laid eyes on it, their son hadn't let go of it. It now had a name – Fluffy – and it occupied a sacred place in their son's arms at all times. She was glad that the orderly had brought it for him; it had thankfully replaced the stuffed dog that Gus normally slept with at night as a type of security blanket when he was restless, and it had seemed to calm him since he had received it as a gift.

 

As if in response to her thoughts, the two women turned to see Justin walking in with their son's breakfast tray. Mel wasn't sure, but she could have sworn she saw a slight frown of disappointment on the young man's face as he noticed Brian wasn't there before he replaced it with a warm smile upon seeing their son awake and responsive, sitting up in bed with the kitten clutched firmly in his embrace.

 

"Hey, Buddy!" Justin called out softly to Gus as he beamed at the now wide-eyed miniature version of his father. "It's so great to see you up and awake!"

 

"Hi, Justin," Lindsay said with a fond smile and a nod of acknowledgment; in the short time they had met this young man, she had become very impressed with his compassion and willingness to go above and beyond his normal duties as orderly. The kitten he had brought for Gus yesterday had sealed the deal in her estimation of him, but just his overall gentle demeanor with their son had made her very glad that he had been the one who had been assigned to help take care of him.

 

"Hi," he said to both women as he carried the tray over to the portable, wheeled hospital table and set it down. "I was so glad when I noticed that this little guy was able to have a soft meal this morning," he said as he smiled over at the doe-eyed child. "Do you think you can eat something, little guy? Are you hungry?" His heart warmed as he saw Gus give him a shy smile and a nod in return.

 

"He told us his throat's a little sore, so I'm not sure how much he'll be able to get down," Lindsay told him as Justin raised the coverings on the plates to reveal a selection of Cheerio's already covered in milk to soften them up, half of a banana, a couple of slices of French toast with the crust removed, a small pitcher of syrup, and a glass of orange juice.

 

Justin looked at the two mothers sheepishly as he noticed their looks of amazement over the bounteous supply of food. "It was too late to get an actual order from you for your son," he explained. "So I took the liberty of stocking his plate with some of my own favorites. I figured surely there'd be something there he'd like. Hope you don't mind."

 

"No," Lindsay told him, smiling. "That was very thoughtful of you." She noticed the young man blush slightly at the compliment. "Actually, you did a great job of guessing what he'd like. He likes all of these things; I'm just not sure how much he'll be able to handle right now."

 

Justin nodded. "That's understandable. He's still recovering. I wouldn't push him to eat too much the first time – he needs to take it kind of slow at first until he's used to eating more solid food. I've left a menu for lunch on the tray. Normally someone like Gus will be under a soft-foods diet for a while, depending on how he does." He turned to smile once more at the little boy as he said, "Hopefully, Buddy, you'll be able to eat something better tomorrow." The little boy stared at him, seemingly entranced by his rich, almost hypnotic tone of voice; he was a little shy around this virtual stranger, but Justin's soft, soothing voice helped to make him more at ease.

 

"Gus, Justin is the one who brought you Fluffy," Mel told their son as he looked up at the orderly. "That's the name for his new kitten," she explained as Justin nodded in understanding. "Can you say thank you?" So far, their son had been limited to snips of words here and there. They didn't want to overtax his throat yet, but she felt it important for their son to express his gratitude.

 

Justin's heart leapt as the little boy whispered out a "thank you" in a tiny, slightly raspy voice.

 

"You're welcome," he said, beaming. "I'm glad you like him. I'm sure you and Fluffy will be the best of friends, and I know you'll give him a good home." Gus smiled a little more confidently now, almost with pride over Justin's statement, feeling a little more comfortable with his new acquaintance.

 

Justin knew it was none of his business, but he had to ask anyway. "Uh….I noticed Mr. Kinney isn't here. I hope everything's okay." He tried hard to make his statement sound business-like and detached, but he wasn't quite sure he was being successful from the glance the two women shared at the mention of Brian.

 

"I persuaded him to go home for a while and catch up on some sleep," Lindsay revealed. "He's also going to check in on his business for a while. He'll probably be back later this afternoon," she told him, smiling knowingly as she saw just the hint of interest flicker in the intense blue eyes as Justin nodded in acknowledgment. "I'm sure he'll return the change of clothes you provided for him, too, by the way, when he comes back." She saw the blond flush at her statement, and wondered just why that would make him uncomfortable.

 

Justin nodded, trying to look as nonchalant as possible. "I'm not worried about it. I'm just glad everything's okay," he added softly as he glanced once more over at Gus and smiled at him. He was a little surprised to realize that while he was thrilled as well as relieved that Gus would be able to leave soon - probably within a few days - that also meant the boy's father would no longer have any reason to come to the hospital, and that filled him with a profound sense of disappointment.

 

"Well, we appreciate everything you've done for Gus," Mel told the blond as she reached over to ruffle the child's hair and Lindsay nodded in agreement. "He means the world to us."

 

Justin nodded. "I can understand why – he's very special. Brian must love him a lot, too, to have spent so much time here with him. I imagine he saved his son's life by getting him here so quickly the other night."

 

Lindsay silently digested this young man's use of Brian's first name that had come so easily from his lips; she wondered just how much interaction this handsome young man had had with Brian that perhaps she and Mel weren't privy to for him to address Brian so casually. "Yes, I think you're right," she told Justin. "We're very glad he recognized how serious the situation was. And he _does_ love Gus very much," she confirmed, even though Mel audibly uttered a soft snort in response.

 

Justin's eyebrows rose slightly at the brunette woman's reaction; apparently she and Brian didn't have as good a rapport as he and Lindsay did. He chose wisely not to comment, however, as he reached over to slowly slide the tray table toward Gus. He let out a soft sigh as he heard someone distinctly calling for an "orderly" out in the hallway. Just once, he wished every employee who worked with him would actually use his name rather than his title to summon him. "I've got to go," he said with an apologetic smile. "Someone's looking for me."

 

He quickly rushed out of the room with a quick goodbye and a smile as the two women turned to look at each other, both with the same, identical expressions on their face.

 

Mel harrumphed. "Looks like the great stud has roped in another one," she said dryly. "I wonder if he's fu….uh," she looked over at Gus who was listening intently before she continued, "I wonder if he's gotten _friendly_ with our little orderly already." She sighed. "He seems like a really nice guy, too; just once couldn't Brian actually come to a hospital without having to come himself?"

 

"Mel," Lindsay chided her partner. "You promised to give it a rest," she said softly as she stood up to push the rolling hospital table over toward their son's bed in preparation for helping him eat his breakfast. "Besides, when would he have had time anyway? He's practically been glued to Gus' side since he was brought in."

 

Mel snorted. "How do we know he was just using the bed next door for _sleeping_?"

 

Lindsay shook her head in irritation. "Let's just drop it for now, okay?" she beseeched, nodding her head over toward their son who seemed to be silently soaking in every word they were saying. Even if Gus _was_ their child, he still seemed to be a particularly perceptive one, and the last thing she wanted was for their son to pick up on Brian's 'extra-curricular activities' or her partner's disdain of him.

 

Mel shrugged. "Okay...for now. But I just wish he'd lay off sometimes; the man's never going to change, though; I know better." She sighed as she stood up and stretched her back. "Do you want some coffee? I think I could use some."

 

Lindsay nodded coolly at her, a little miffed that Mel just wouldn't let her scorn for Brian go. "Yeah…thanks," she told her partner as Mel reached over to kiss Gus' cheek and smile at him before she walked out of the room toward the vending machines down the hall.

 

As Lindsay began to help her son eat, she couldn't help silently agreeing with Mel about one thing, though; she hoped that if Brian _was_ involved with Justin, he wasn't just toying with his emotions like he was apt to normally do. This man seemed to deserve so much more, and she would be vastly disappointed in Brian if he was. She knew, though, that ultimately it would be Justin who would have to guard his heart and protect it; she was helpless to prevent what might happen when it came to her friend's inclination to toy with his 'prey.' "Good job, Sweetheart," she murmured with a smile to Gus as he took a small bite of the cereal and swallowed it tentatively. _Let's hope you don't grow up to be the same type of detached charmer as your father…._

 

* * *

 

 

_Same Day – 4:00 p.m._

 

Justin tucked in the last corner of the latest hospital bed that needed to be prepared for an incoming patient and placed the soiled linen in his portable hamper that was attached to his rolling supply cart. He tried to convince himself it was just a lucky coincidence that he had wound up on the same floor of Brian Kinney's son during the last part of the day, but he knew that was a lie. He had been roaming throughout the hospital all day, performing his duties as an orderly, while constantly finding excuses to come down to the 2nd floor to take quick peeks into a certain patient's room as he walked by each time, hoping that _another_ certain brunet would be in there visiting with his son. He had been profoundly disappointed to find that he wasn't there, however. He had even traded duties with another orderly earlier so he would make sure to be the one to deliver Gus' lunch tray to him, hoping that Brian would be there, but again, it was only the two mothers there instead.

 

He finally couldn't bite his tongue any longer, knowing how devoted Brian seemed toward his son, and had to ask as casually as he could if they had heard from him. Lindsay had given him some sort of amused, almost apologetic smile as she told him that Brian had called a couple of times during the morning to check in on Gus to make sure he was still doing okay; when she had confirmed to him that he was, he had told her he had gotten hung up on some sort of crisis at his work but he assured her he would be in later to see his son.

 

As he slowly rolled the cart toward the open door to the hallway, Justin knew how silly and juvenile he was being about wanting to see Brian. There was just something about him, though, both irritating and fascinating at the same time that drew him in. He vowed, however, that he was not going to let the overly confident, hot-as-fucking-hell man let him know just _how_ much, though. He sighed – he only had one more hour before his shift was over. One more hour to encounter the man who was overly dominating so many of his thoughts lately…..He shook his head in disgust at his daydreaming ruminations. _Snap out of it, Taylor!_ he scolded himself as he walked out into the hallway. Even now, though, he couldn't help craning his head down the hallway to the right where he knew a particular little boy was residing, just hoping that he would catch a glimpse of a certain visitor.

 

"Orderly!" he suddenly heard one of the older nurses calling to him from the nurses' station a little ways down the hall in the opposite direction. He snorted to himself. _Maybe I should petition for a name change…_

 

"Coming, _Nurse!"_ he couldn't help responding in kind with a snicker. _Well, two could play that game_ , he thought with just the hint of a smile as he wheeled the cart down the opposite direction from Gus' room, his attention briefly turned to a more immediate matter.

 

* * *

 

 

_Same Time_

 

Brian couldn't help the broad smile on his face – it had been plastered there from the moment he had entered his son's room about fifteen minutes ago when he had found him sitting up in bed with the IV no longer hooked to him and the typical rosy tint back in his cheeks. His son had smiled back at him in response and it had made Brian's heart soar even higher.

 

Lindsay and Mel, who had taken advantage of his return to walk down to the cafeteria for an early supper, had told him that their son had eaten part of not only his breakfast but also his lunch. He reached over to tousle his son's hair as he grinned over at the little boy holding his kitten against his chest. "You really like Fluffy, don't you, Sonny Boy?" he murmured as Gus nodded with a smile. "I'm glad he's found a good home. And I'm really glad that you're eating now."

 

"Ice cream, Daddy," Gus unexpectedly said all of a sudden. "Chock-lit."

 

Brian laughed softly. "Ice cream?" he repeated as Gus nodded vigorously. "You're wanting some ice cream?" He shook his head in amusement; now that his son was getting better, apparently his appetite was returning, also, and he had apparently realized quickly that a soft-food diet also included one of his favorite foods in the whole world. "Well, I'll see what I can do, okay?" he told his son.

 

He wondered how best to fulfill his son's request, however; he didn't know if calling the nurse's station was appropriate, but he also knew he didn't want to leave his son's side at the moment, either. His son looked like he was definitely well on the mend, but he wasn't about to leave him alone for even a second. Finally, he decided to hell with it as he reached over to firmly push the call button wrapped around his son's bed railing.

 

A few seconds later, a tinny, female voice could be heard saying, "Yes?"

 

"Uh….this is Brian Kinney in Room 211 calling for my son, Gus," he stated. "He's wanting some chocolate ice cream. Any chance I could get a hold of some?" A sudden inspiration occurred to him as he tried to inflect as much charm into his next sentence as he could. "Maybe one of the orderlies could bring him some. I would be _very_ appreciative." He knew there had to be several orderlies employed at the hospital, and the chance was miniscule at best, but he thought maybe it just might work anyway…..

 

The Kinney charm, however, didn't have quite the effect he was hoping for. A detached-sounding voice politely informed him, "I'm sorry, sir, but it will have to wait until dinner trays are served. We don't have adequate staff at the moment to handle special requests. You can ask the orderly to get your son some when he brings in his dinner tray."

 

"Well…sorry to have bothered you then," Brian huffed in disappointment before throwing the corded call button down onto Gus' bed as the child's eyes grew large in response. Brian smiled back at him sheepishly, a little embarrassed by his reaction. "Sorry, Buddy….Daddy tried; I don't think they've got anybody who can bring you some right now. I'll make sure you get some soon, though, when the orderly brings in your dinner tray, okay?" He watched as his son's lips curved downward in a slight pout as he gazed at him tenderly. This little boy was definitely his son, he thought in amusement. If I saw that look, I would get it for him, too…... He reached over to lightly rub his son's shoulder comfortingly. "It won't be long, Buddy, before your dinner comes. I'll get you some, don't worry."

 

Justin couldn't help overhearing the conversation crackling from the patient intercom located at the nurses' station as he approached it to see what the unnamed nurse needed with him. His heart began to pound as he immediately recognized the sultry voice of Brian Kinney filtering out through the scratchy system, asking for some chocolate ice cream, and he couldn't help wincing inwardly at the somewhat impatient voice that responded to him. It was the same nurse who had so unceremoniously called for him earlier.

 

He bit back what he really wanted to say to the short, 'pleasingly plump' red-headed, 40ish nurse as she turned to acknowledge him. "You needed me for something?" he asked politely, no particular warmth in his voice.

 

"Yes," the woman said rather sternly. "There's a new patient being wheeled up from the ER to Room 207. I need the patient added to the dinner tray count. You'll be delivering them, I assume?" She eyed him so intently, like he was some sort of production number at a factory, that it made Justin distinctly uncomfortable as well as just a little resentful. He wondered just why this sort of person was even working in a hospital setting….

 

"Yes," he told her stiffly. "I'll take care of it." The woman gave him a curt nod before dismissing him as she turned back to the paperwork at her desk behind the counter and sat down, now totally ignoring him. Justin shook his head slightly in irritation, thankful that most of the other personnel employed by the hospital were much more respectful and friendly in nature, before he silently turned with his cart to wheel it down the hallway a few steps away until he reached the supply closet. Sliding his ID card into the slot, he opened the door and pushed the cart inside before turning to leave and closing the door firmly behind him.

 

Taking a look around as if he were afraid someone was observing him, he turned to his right away from the nurses' station and walked a few feet down to a nearby room that was reserved for extraneous supplies: extra plastic utensils, a coffeemaker and Styrofoam cups, packs of condiments, individually-wrapped packages of crackers, and a full-size refrigerator normally used to hold medical supplies that needed to be refrigerated. He knew, though, that it also held occasional extra inventory such as small cans of juice, sticks of cheese, and most importantly of all, small plastic cups of ice cream.

 

Looking around left and right before he slid his card into the slot, but feeling ridiculous at the same time – after all, he worked here and was _allowed_ if not expected to enter this room from time to time – he waited somewhat impatiently for the typical click of the door's lock disengaging before he pushed the door open and entered. He walked over to swing the upper compartment door open to the freezer part of the refrigerator and smiled: he spied approximately half a dozen cups of ice cream nestled inside. Reaching in to grab two cups of chocolate ones, he closed the door and pulled out a nearby shelf to secure a wrapped, plastic spoon before he placed all of the items in his white uniform pocket and walked back out.

 

He took a deep breath of courage before he resumed walking a little farther down the hallway to arrive at Room #211. He paused just out of sight to calm his nerves and plaster a professional-looking mask on his face before he licked his lips nervously and plunged inside.

 

He was rewarded by the sight of Brian sitting in his normal position by his son's bedside. He was speaking to his son in a low, loving tone of voice that made Justin's own heart melt with its gentleness and tenderness. "And you know what else, Sonny Boy?" he was whispering to him. "As soon as you're all better, we'll go to the fair. They've got horses and pigs and sheep and cows, and all kinds of rides to go on. Would you like that?"

 

Justin smiled as the little boy beamed back at his father, his eyes shining clearly with love. The blond was absolutely fascinated with this side of the confident, handsome, assertive man. He knew Brian had to love his little boy very much to have constantly stayed by his side while he was recovering, but now that he could actually see the two interacting, he marveled at their close bond.

 

Gus noticed Justin standing just inside the room and he turned his small head to observe the blond standing there quietly near the door. His son's gaze caught the eye of his father, who turned around in his chair to see the orderly he had been hoping to encounter. He noticed Justin's face redden slightly as their eyes locked onto each other.

 

"Well, look who's here, Sonny Boy," Brian whispered as he leaned companionably toward his son. "It's our own little personal care assistant." Brian smirked at their visitor, who promptly flushed even deeper at the attention, despite his best effort at not trying to appear affected by the other man. "What brings you to our humble room…. _orderly_?" Brian teased him. Sure enough, he was rewarded with an icy stare as Justin walked closer to them and stood next to the bed.

 

"I heard that someone was asking for this," he said a little defensively as he glared at Brian and reached inside his pocket to retrieve the two cups of chocolate ice cream he had confiscated from the refrigerator, along with the plastic spoon. Justin noticed the little boy's eyes light up as he recognized the dessert and his little, angelic face broke out into a delighted smile, causing Justin to smile back at him as if they were co-conspirators.

 

"I thought the nurse said it would have to wait until dinner," Brian pointed out as he stared into the hypnotizing blue eyes.

 

Justin licked his lips nervously, the tip of a tantalizing pink tongue coming out to take a small swipe across to wet them; the action did not go unnoticed by Brian, whose eyes immediately lowered to study the fullness of his mouth and again wonder just what it would feel like to kiss those lips and use them for various pleasant activities that involved just the two of them…...

 

Justin rocked slightly on his feet, feeling decidedly awkward to be under such intense scrutiny. He placed the two cups of ice cream down on the portable hospital table as he said, "I happen to overhear the nurse and had a little extra time on my hands, so I thought I'd take care of it for her," he maintained, trying hard to make it sound like just another part of his job. He had a feeling, though, that he was doing a very poor job of convincing Brian of that as the brunet looked at him with what could only be called a knowing smirk.

 

"I think you just wanted to see me again," Brian told him confidently; he was rewarded with an attractive tint of deep pink appearing on the blond's cheeks. _Gotcha….._

 

Justin did his best to stare back evenly at the older man before retorting, "Don't flatter yourself; I didn't even know you were here. But since you _do_ happen to be here now, you can help him with it then," he told Brian. "I have to go _do my job now_ and get the dinner trays ready." He nodded slightly at Gus before gazing stiffly at Brian and turning silently toward the door to leave.

 

Brian's gaze fixed on Justin's retreating form as he left and he found himself torn between staying with his son, who was reaching over eagerly toward one of the ice cream cups, or following the blond out to talk to him. He was spared the dilemma when Lindsay and Mel chose just that time to return from the cafeteria. He quickly stood up. "Uh…help Gus out with his ice cream, okay? I'll be right back," he hurriedly told them, before rushing out of the room in search of Justin. He looked to the left and then to the right, just catching a glimpse of shiny blond hair disappearing around a corner of the hallway as he sprinted down the expanse in hopes of catching up with his target before he completely evaded him.

 

"Justin!" he called out breathlessly as he hurried around the corner and observed the blond getting into an elevator. He watched anxiously for a few seconds, worried that he had missed him, until he noticed the younger man finally stepping back out and peering over at him in what seemed like a mixture of curiosity and irritation.

 

Secretly relieved that he had been able to catch up to him, he slowed down somewhat as he walked up to him, trying to exude an air of confidence; thankfully, the two of them were relatively alone since the elevator was located at the end of an unused hallway and the row of elevators was apparently reserved for hospital employees only.

 

Justin let out an exasperated breath and placed his hands on his hips as he glared at the other man. "What?" he huffed out. "Did Gus drop his spoon on the floor and you need me now to go find you another one? Run out of orange soap for your next shower? Or were you still looking for someone to teach you CPR?" He bit his lip in aggravation. "I told you – I have _work_ to do….. _Mr. Kinney_." He swiveled around to punch the button for the next elevator car and remained standing there rigidly, his back to the other man. He didn't dare turn back around, because somehow he knew that Brian was still there; he could almost feel his eyes boring into the back of him.

 

Brian stopped for a second or two to observe how the sound of his name on those luscious lips sounded so intriguing to him and made his blood stir with desire. He glanced around to see if anyone was observing them, pleased that no one was around at the moment to notice them. "I still haven't thanked you for taking such good care of my son," he said softly, his voice oddly without any inflection of sarcasm.

 

"I told you before – I was just doing my job." Justin turned around and punched the 'down' button again, hoping somehow it would make the car arrive faster but knowing it wouldn't.

 

"Justin…."

 

The blond closed his eyes briefly, startled momentarily by the other man's use of his first name. He liked the way it sounded on his lips, like some sensual, slow, steady rain after a thunderstorm had dissipated. He couldn't resist turning around finally, his eyes widening as he noticed how close their bodies had become, almost touching now; he could actually feel the other man's breath on his face as Brian silently stared down at him inscrutably, not giving away any hint of his actual feelings.

 

He sighed in resignation, tired of the game they constantly were playing. He couldn't keep up with the scorecard anymore; just what was Brian's purpose in all of this? "What do you want, Brian?" he murmured wearily as he stood there gazing into the darkening eyes of greenish-gold _. God,_ _this man was magnificent_ , he still couldn't help thinking as he took a moment to study him.

 

Brian stood there silently for a couple of seconds as he considered that question. Now that Gus was getting better, he had a little more time to concentrate more closely on this captivating man in front of him. Just what _did_ he want with him? Why did he – and Justin – keep making up excuses to see each other under the pretense of it being _business_? Both of them knew intrinsically that there was more going on than that; the attraction between the two of them was growing stronger by the day. To Brian's surprise, though, he was rapidly realizing that he wasn't just interested in this blond beauty as merely a plaything, though. His feelings were running deeper than that.

 

Justin waited but there was no reply from Brian. Sighing, he heard the ding behind him from the elevator, signaling the impending arrival of the downward car that would take him to the commissary to retrieve the day's supply of dinner trays, and he knew his time was fast running out, not only now but for good; soon Brian would have no more need to be here. He would disappear from his life as quickly as he had arrived. Once his son was discharged from the hospital, he would no longer have any reason to come back; most likely their paths would never cross again. But why should they? He was a fledgling artist and Brian Kinney was a successful, well-established businessman. There would be no logical reason why he would ever see him again, he realized, and that filled him with an inexplicable sense of loss. He would miss the opportunity to get to know this intriguing man before they even got started.

 

He shook his head in defeat. "I….I have to go," he told the brunet, unable to keep the reluctance from seeping into his voice as he nodded his head toward the elevator. "They'll be looking for me soon." He turned around as he heard the whoosh of the car doors opening, noticing a man who was apparently a doctor somewhat impatiently waiting for him to enter. He had the trademark stethoscope draped around his neck, but Justin wasn't close enough to read the name inscribed on the badge he was wearing.

 

Suddenly, he found himself roughly yanked backward, away from the doors and against the nearby wall as he heard Brian say in a commanding tone of voice, "Move on, Doctor Goodbody – he's changed his mind." Justin gasped softly as his own body was shoved intimately up against Brian's; there was no mistaking the brunet's desire for him as Brian deliberately began to grind his hips into his. He placed both of his hands against the wall on either side of Justin's shoulders, effectively making him a prisoner between the wall and his body as his eyes bored into his.

 

"Perverts," he heard the man mutter as the employee punched the 'closed door' button and the doors slid shut, leaving the two men alone once more.

 

Justin flushed at the intense look in Brian's eyes – the glinting orbs of gold and green were almost on fire, almost matching the heat that was rushing through his body as the other man leaned in until they were almost touching nose to nose. He felt as if he was paralyzed as Brian whispered, "You asked me a question and I didn't get to answer it yet."

 

Justin swallowed hard at the almost predatory look in Brian's eyes; all of a sudden, he completely forgot exactly what he had asked him. "I did?" he asked dumbly as Brian smirked.

 

"Yeah, you did," the brunet whispered softly, his breath warm and enveloping. "You asked me what I wanted."

 

Justin let out a shaky breath; he could feel Brian's arousal – his desire for _him_ – hard and unyielding between his legs and it made his own body flush with the knowledge. For a fleeting moment, he thought about the need for a quick-acting thermometer so he could take his temperature, but if he had one to use he knew his reading would be off the charts right now. "Oh," was the only word he managed to utter; he cursed himself silently for his lack of eloquence. He frantically tried to inhale some steadying air, trying desperately to find his voice again. Finally, he managed to reply with a surprisingly degree of steadiness, "So what _do_ you want?"

 

His heart leapt into his throat at the single word growled back at him that he had been hoping he would hear. " _You_."

 

He barely had a chance to even consider a rational, intelligent rejoinder before Brian promptly smashed his lips against his and ground his body even further into his own. He moaned through his mouth in response as Brian's tongue poked out to demand entrance. He hesitated for just a second, knowing how this would look if they were caught by a bystander, before he opened his mouth anyway and Brian plunged inside; his tongue seemed to be like some sexy serpent as it began to promptly lap and flick over every part of his mouth; his roof, his teeth, his own tongue, everywhere as the kiss kept going on and on…..

 

The ding of another elevator car arriving jolted the two men from their hazy bubble of desire a few minutes later. Realizing where he was, Justin pushed back against Brian to break the kiss and create a safer space between them, frantically trying to regain some oxygen back into his body as his breathing rushed out of him in a ragged series of shallow pants. He knew if his lips looked as ravaged as Brian's did, there would be question what the two had been doing if they were seen together; his mouth was still tingling from the rush of emotion that had surged through him at the first touch of Brian's hands and lips against his. He frantically breathed in heavily through his open mouth, trying fervently to calm his fluttering heart. No man had ever made him feel the way he felt right now; this man was like a master musician and he was his pliable, willing instrument.

 

He knew in seconds he would have to go; his time had long past expired for when he was expected downstairs. "I really have to go," he whispered out raggedly, but Brian's hands remained where he was, pinning him within his sensuous prison. "Brian…..I can't stay here."

 

Brian knew he had to let Justin go, but now that he had had a taste of him, he didn't want to. He had been right about those lips; they were divine. They molded perfectly against his as if they had been made for him and they made his body thrum with pleasure. He wondered idly if there was an empty supply closet somewhere nearby – anywhere – because he couldn't wait to find out just how many other kinds of pleasure this man's body could provide for him. He knew now that one taste wasn't going to be nearly enough, and he was not a very patient man when it came to something he wanted, and he wanted this man _badly_.

 

Not wanting Justin to know how much power he had over him, however, he reluctantly pulled back to gaze down into the lust-filled, steel-blue eyes. "Wouldn't want to keep the hospital's finest from performing his duties," he replied huskily with a slight smile as he dropped his hands to his side and moved slightly back to allow Justin enough room to move away. "I'm sure I'm not the _only_ hungry one around here that needs his appetite satisfied." He was rewarded with a dark-pink flush to Justin's cheeks in response as the blond backed away from him toward the arriving elevator.

 

The elevator doors slid open just then and Justin miraculously found the car empty. Thanking the fates for not forcing him to try and appear detached when his heart was pounding in response to Brian's double entendre, he quickly rushed into the car and turned around to face the brunet, who was staring at him intensely with a sly smile on his face.

 

"Later….. _Justin_ ," Brian whispered just before the doors silently slid shut and the blond found himself alone with just his still-fluttering heart and his jumbled thoughts in turmoil. _What have I unleashed?_ he couldn't help thinking as the elevator slowly trudged downward and he leaned back against the far mirrored wall for support. He couldn't prevent the sudden, slight smile that appeared on his lips, however, as he reached up with his fingers to touch his mouth that was still burning from his and Brian's kiss. His last thought before the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened was the hope that a certain brunet was currently feeling the same thing.

 


	10. One Loves It, One Hates It

_Early Next Morning – Hospital_

 

"You look like shit, Justin."

 

"Why, thank you, Dr. Chanders, you're not looking particularly perky, either, you know."

 

Daphne grinned, refusing to rise to the bait as she stared down at Justin's tired-looking face. She had rushed into the small vending machine room on the main floor to grab some barely-passable coffee and had had the good fortune of running into her friend, who apparently had needed a jolt of java, too. "I have a good excuse. They work me like a dog here, remember? So what's yours?" she asked as she sat down opposite him, her eyes twinkling with amusement at his pained expression.

 

"I just didn't sleep well last night, that's all," he answered noncommittally as he took a small sip of the still-steaming brew. It tasted like shit as always but at least for a change it was more than hot enough. Speaking of things that were more than hot enough… He blinked, trying to forget where that particular train of thought was heading.

 

"Yeah, I noticed," she answered curiously, observing her friend seemingly daydreaming rather than paying attention to her. "Uh…..Earth to Justin," she sing-songed. Hello." She shook her head in consternation. "What is _up_ with you today?" she asked.

 

The blond flushed as he realized he had been caught obsessing about a certain, dangerously sexy brunet. "Nothing," he replied a little defensively. "I'm fine – I told you; I just didn't sleep too well last night – it happens." He sighed after a short pause in the conversation, however, as he noticed Daphne not buying it; she continued to stare at him, the unspoken question hanging in the air. "Okay….maybe I had some things on my mind," he finally admitted at last.

 

"Some _things_?" She eyed him intently. "Or maybe…..some _one_?"

 

Justin huffed. "Not again, Daphne; I warned you, damn it!" he said just a little more curtly than he meant to. "Not everything's about _him_ , you know," he said a little more softly as he noticed the shocked look on her face at his vehement retort.

 

The young resident studied the flush that had suddenly spread all over her friend's cheeks; maybe _everything_ wasn't about Brian Kinney, but apparently she had just hit the nail on the head this time, and for some reason it filled her with outright glee instead of anger. "Shit!" she cried in triumph. "I AM right – you couldn't sleep last night because of _him,_ could you? What happened? Oh, my God! You weren't _together_ , were you?" she asked, her eyes sparkling at the possibility as she placed her elbows on the small, circular laminate table and stared intently into the sapphire eyes, trying to see the truth behind them.

 

Justin bristled. "Daphne! His son's still in the hospital! Shit – do you really think I'd _do_ that?" Although, he had to admit, the idea had crossed his mind – repeatedly – but two things prevented him from acting upon it – the fact that Brian's son was still recuperating and should, therefore, be his priority, and his own uncertainty over Brian's motives – was he really interested in him or just toying with him like a convenient plaything?

 

"Well," she conceded. "Maybe not yet. But you _were_ thinking about him…..weren't you?"

 

Justin sighed. "Maybe," he admitted. Before she had a chance to say anything else, though, he added quickly, "Can you blame me? The man's hot, Daphne." He twisted one side of his mouth up in a sort of _you got me_ kind of look. "Yeah, I've noticed… he's not bad on the eyes."

 

Daphne snorted. "I believe we already _had_ this conversation, Mr. Taylor. What I want to know is what caused you to lose sleep about it last night?"

 

"Nothing," Justin insisted still. "Look, I know your heart's in the right place, but just drop it, okay? I can take care of myself."

 

She stared at her friend in disappointment. "Well, lucky for you I have to go make rounds." She stood up, paper cup in hand, to quickly gulp down the rest of her now lukewarm concoction. "So I'll do what you ask – for now. But honestly, Justin! Quit selling yourself short…..go after him, if that's what you want! Because I've seen the way he looks at you when he doesn't think anyone's noticing – it's mutual, trust me."

 

Justin wanted to believe that; he _wanted_ to believe that Brian really was starting to care about him and not just an opportunity to get into his pants. He knew the man certainly made his pulse race with anticipation now, every time he was near, especially after that kiss yesterday. Fuck, that was hot…..and if he got that hard just having the man pushed up against him and his lips caught on fire just from that one passionate kiss, he could only imagine what it would be like to be together with him with nothing but skin on glorious, bronze skin…..

 

The clearing of Daphne's throat brought Justin back to reality as he stared up at her sheepishly. His friend had a distinctive look of smug satisfaction on her face as she said, "Never mind….I think I've already answered my question about whether you want him. The question now is: What are you going to do about it?"

 

She smiled enigmatically before reaching over to throw her now-empty cup into the nearby round, metal trash container. "Got to go, Hot Stuff," she kidded her friend as she stood up to leave. "Lunch later?"

 

Justin laughed; only Daphne would worry about lunch right after _that_ speech. "Sure," he answered. "Unless I wind up with some _other_ appetizer first." He grinned at her mock expression of shock before she nodded and rushed out of the room to begin her duties.

 

He watched her go, pondering what she had said. _Yeah, Justin…..just what ARE you going to do about it?_ He sighed, realizing he had to get to work, too. He would have to deal with the delicious problem of Brian Kinney later.

 

* * *

_Recreation Room – Second Floor_

 

 

"Justin! Me next!"

Jenna was a petite, slender, five-year-old girl with pale skin and long, straight hair; she was the classic redhead with blue eyes and freckles on her face and she presently wore a wide smile as she gazed at Justin excitedly. "I want to be a lion!" she cried out, pulling on Justin's arm to get his attention.

 

"You mean a lioness," Justin corrected her softly with a smile as he leaned toward her. The tiny, hard plastic chair he was sitting in was made more for the young patients he interacted with daily; they were adequate enough for children, but even with his slender frame they still made his ass sore sitting on the hard surface. But he couldn't really complain, not when he compared himself to the patients, because this particular wing of the hospital was reserved for children suffering from chronic cancer conditions; everything from leukemia to brain tumors. All of them, unfortunately, had the same thing in common: the children he spent time with here would probably in all likelihood never go home again. They would never play on a playground, or go swimming, or even ride a bike. Their remaining time would be spent here – in the somewhat sterile, unimaginative world of a children's hospital.

 

About two months ago, he had broached the idea of using part of his work time with some of the more mobile patients in the recreation area, using his art talent in hopes of helping to assuage their pain. Somewhat to his surprise, the hospital board had agreed rather quickly to his idea, and he had soon found himself coming to this part of the second floor for at least an hour a day. Sometimes, if things were slow and the patients were few, he could spend ever more time than that here.

 

He had quickly grown to love this part of his day; in fact, he had soon discovered that he was receiving more benefits out of it than the children were. Each day he came to the recreation room and saw the look of pleasure on their faces when he arrived, it quickly made what could have been a totally shitty day just the opposite for him. He was proud of the fact that his art could made the patients forget, if just for a brief time, that they were in the hospital for serious reasons. While he was with them, the pain they had to deal with on a daily basis was somehow almost magically banished from their minds and bodies, if just for a brief moment. He avoided dwelling on why the children were here, because he knew it would fill him with profound sadness if he did; he was somehow able to push it firmly aside while he was working one-on-one with them. He plastered on his most winning smile and used his warmest, gentlest tone of voice when he was here to reassure them that they were just like all the other children, and just for a short time they actually believed him; it was the least he could for the little ones who gave so much back in return.

 

What always astounded him was the joy in their faces over the littlest of things he would do for them – help them draw a picture for their mother or father, paint flowers, clowns, or animals on their faces to transform them into something almost mythical, or even play some skeet ball with them in the game room area set up in a corner of the expansive room.

 

While they were here, just for a little while, these children could forget they were seriously ill, even terminal. They could just be _kids_. Despite the adversity they were facing, they always had a smile on their faces. And Justin decided that if they could put a smile on their face, he could , too.

 

"Ready, Honey?" he asked the little girl now, who nodded her head vigorously in response. "You'll have to stay real still while I'm painting, okay?" he whispered as she smiled and nodded slightly, then abruptly froze just like a dutiful, beautiful porcelain statue. Jenna had been one of the lucky ones, if you could even put it that way; even though she had underwent radiation and chemotherapy treatment, she still somehow possessed a glorious mop of thick, red hair. In fact, if Justin wasn't aware of it, to look at her you wouldn't even know she was seriously ill. Sometimes that was what made things so hard to bear – knowing that even the healthiest-looking children were anything but.

 

He swallowed hard at the thought, but forced himself to place the smile back on his face as he reached out gently with the tip of his brown-hued brush and began to apply whiskers to either side of her smooth, porcelain face. She giggled slightly at the light touch as he reached over to wipe the brush off with a white, slightly-stained rag and dip it into the black paint of the palette that sat on the miniature table in front of them to make her nose. "Don't smile yet," he gently chided her, "and keep still, Sweetheart. I have to put your lioness' mouth on now." He repeated his previous action, this time finding the dusty pink shade he needed and outlining her face with what he hoped would resemble decidedly-female 'lion lips.' "Almost done," he told her softly as he concentrated on his subject, who was itching to see what her new persona looked like. "Just a little more."

 

Finally after a few seconds, Justin put his brush down in a small paper cup of water to let it soak as he picked up a small mirror with a light-green, Bakelite frame. "What do you think?" he asked. His smile widened as he noticed the entranced, wide-eyed look of joy on Jenna's face. Yes….this was definitely his most favorite part of the day by far.

 

"I'm beautiful!" she cried out in delight, her face beaming as she continued to stare at her reflection. For just a second – just a brief second – she was the same as any other child on the planet, and it humbled Justin greatly to think he had been responsible for that. It also made any of his other problems seem insignificant.

 

"Yes, Honey, you certainly are," he murmured as he reached his hand over to grasp her slight shoulder and give it a squeeze. "Do you have a lioness name picked out?"

 

He watched in amusement as the little girl pondered her new identity in the mirror for a few seconds before she nodded her head. "Nala," she decided. "I want to be the Lion King's girlfriend."

 

Justin nodded in approval. "Very good choice," he told her as the child beamed at the compliment. "I like the Lion King a lot, don't you?" Jenna nodded almost shyly as she turned to ask him, "Can I go show Mommy and Daddy my new face now?"

 

Justin looked over at Cathy McDonald, the nurse who normally manned the nurses' station down at the ER; once she had found out about Justin's daily visit to the recreation center, and how much of a positive effect he had on the patients there, she had wrangled a way to be the nurse who oversaw the patients while he was visiting them. It gave her a brief respite from the harried pace of her normal duties and also gave her an opportunity to feel like she was making a difference somehow in their fragile lives.

 

She smiled and nodded at the little girl. "Come on, Honey, I'll take you back to your room. Want to say goodbye to Justin first?"

 

"Bye, Justin. I love you."

 

Justin smiled warmly as the little girl reached over to give him a small kiss on the cheek before she reached her small hand around his neck to hug him. He couldn't help returning the gesture, holding onto her around her tiny waist for a few seconds before letting her go. "I'll see you again soon, Jenna," he whispered in a choked voice; it was hard to swallow the emotional lump that abruptly appeared as he spoke. It happened every time he had to say goodbye to one of them. "Take care, Honey." As he watched her leave, his eyes met Cathy's for just a moment, and he knew they were both thinking the same thing; neither knew if he would or not, because with these children – the sickest of the sick – the next day was never a guarantee for any of them.

 

He sighed in melancholy before he reached over to retrieve his art supplies and carry them over to a nearby stainless steel sink to begin cleaning them off. He knew that despite how difficult it was to be around these patients sometimes, he would be back again tomorrow - as long as he had a promise to keep and children to help.

 

Unbeknownst to Justin, his movements were being closely watched by a tall, elegantly-dressed man peering in curiously through the wide expanse of windows ringing either side of the large playroom. Brian had stopped by for a few minutes to check on Gus before going into work; he had missed several days now and urgently needed to catch up with everything going on. Despite Theodore's assistance and the competency of his assistant, Cynthia, he knew when it came to his most important clients they only wanted to work with him and him alone. He had decided now that Gus was definitely going to be okay, he could cut back somewhat on the time he needed to spend with him, especially since the Munchers were there, also, to watch over him.

 

As he walked by the windows of the recreation room and glanced in, however, he was taken aback to see his favorite orderly animatedly interacting with a young, wispy-looking red-headed child. He appeared to be painting some sort of design on her cheek, although from his angle he couldn't quite make out what he was drawing. From the enraptured look on the child's face, however, she was thoroughly enjoying his 'masterpiece.' He stood there, transfixed by the tender interaction going on between Justin and the patient, until the blond finished what he was doing and held up a mirror for her to look at herself. The little girl smiled radiantly at the result and soon gave Justin a kiss and hug on the cheek for his efforts, making Brian wistfully wish that it was _him_ sitting there instead. After the kiss _he_ had shared with the blond orderly yesterday, he couldn't wait to imbibe in another one. _Lucky girl…._

 

He ducked back slightly from the window as the little girl took the hand of a nurse in the room and the two walked toward the door; as they came out, he put his head down and pretended to be reading the newspaper he had picked up downstairs in the vending machine until he felt he had allowed sufficient time for the two to leave.

 

Cathy smirked to herself as she recognized the handsome man hanging back from the door as if he were busily studying what he had in his hand; something told her, however, that he had something much more _interesting_ to check out. Either this was a very lucky coincidence, she decided, or it was Mr. Kinney's lucky day – and maybe Justin's. She pursed her lips together to keep from smiling too much as she gently clasped Jenna's hand and continued walking down the opposite side of the hallway, acting as if she hadn't seen anything out of the ordinary.

 

Brian waited until the two had disappeared down the hallway before quietly walking over to the open door to peer in; Justin had his back to him as he stood over a stainless steel sink, washing out some brushes with soapy water. He slowly crept inside, his footsteps muffled by the thick carpeting underneath his feet. He stopped a few feet away from his target briefly to admire the view; Justin had doffed his white uniform jacket, which was hung across the back of a nearby chair, and was wearing a simple outfit of a white, short-sleeve, form-fitting tee-shirt and matching white, cotton uniform pants. Brian had to admit that for standard-issue uniform attire, the pants fit his favorite orderly like a glove – a glove cradling two of the most perfectly-shaped parts of an ass he had ever had the fortune to behold. Just the sight of the rounded mounds of what must be creamy flesh underneath made his cock stir with desire and his mouth salivate with anticipation. Justin was his own little Angel in White, but he was determined to bring out the devil in him soon….

 

He slowly continued to creep forward, unable to stop himself from pursuing his goal. Justin had his head down, intent on his work, and it provided Brian with a glorious view of the pale, smooth flesh of the blond's neck. He wished for just a second that he was a native of Transylvania because at that moment he wanted nothing more than to suck and bite on that wonderful, exposed neck forever.

 

Justin hurriedly washed out the remainder of his paintbrushes, placing them in a long, thin pencil case to keep them damp until he could get home. He was due to begin preparing the unoccupied rooms for incoming patients, but he always took time to properly clean his brushes; they were so expensive, especially the horsehair kind, that he didn't want to waste one penny of them. He reached over to pull down a paper towel and dry his hands, preparing to return to his more mundane duties.

 

His heart leapt into his throat as he felt a pair of strong arms firmly grasp him around his chest from behind and pull him backward into a wall of firm, taut flesh. For just a second, he was frightened, thinking it was some sort of stick up. But then he felt some _other_ type of 'stick' poking into him and he realized with startling clarity just who was 'accosting' him. "Brian," he whispered with certainty.

 

"That's Leroy to you, Florence," was the husky retort as Brian continued to hold him captive between his body and the sink; the whisper of the ridiculous 'pseudo name' sent tendrils of want through him as he felt the warmth of Brian's breath on his face.

 

"What are you doing in here?" he asked almost absurdly. "This is for patients."

 

"Well, I'm running _out_ of patience," Brian told him, his voice laced with a tone that sounded distinctly like lust as he nuzzled Justin's cheek with his own. "And I'm in need of some special care that only _you_ can take care of."

 

Justin snorted. "Oh, I doubt that," he retorted softly struggling to keep his voice calm; inside, though, his heart was beating like a frantic dance tune. "Something tells me you don't have any problem with having your _needs_ taken care of just fine." He struggled slightly against his bonds without success; it only seemed to tighten the other man's hold on him even more. "Let me go, Brian," he said, even though his body was screaming otherwise; God, if he kept holding onto him like they were glued together, he was going to need some major CPR himself…..He closed his eyes tightly, deciding that was the wrong image he needed at the moment, because there was only one man's lips he was interested in pursuing CPR with….

 

"Brian…..Let go," he repeated with a little more conviction. "I have rounds to do and they'll be looking for me."

 

He heard the brunet snicker softly. "Well, I was looking for you, too…and it seems I found you. _All_ of you…"

 

Justin shivered slightly at the velvety tone of Brian's voice; it seemed that since the man had found out his son was going to be okay, the beast inside of him had been unleashed. As he continued to struggle against the sinewy arms encasing him, he wondered if he had the wherewithal to control what had emerged – or even if he wanted to. He knew reluctantly, though, that there was a time and a place to entertain such thoughts and this wasn't it. He needed this job, and while times had changed somewhat, there were still a lot of narrow-minded people left in the world – and the hospital. "Brian…..please…." He placed his hands over Brian's arms and tried to pry the two of them apart, but it was like fighting against bands of forged steel. "I can't do this….."

 

Brian leaned down to whisper in his voice. "Now…..or ever?" He was actually surprised to hear the slight anxiety in his voice as he spoke. He never was worried before about what a man's response to him would be; it was just a given that any man would willingly give him whatever he craved, when and wherever he wanted it. But for some reason, it seemed to matter quite a bit when it involved this particular blond.

 

Justin sighed. "I think you know the answer to that," he admitted softly. He could feel Brian's hot breath on his cheek as the brunet said, "Good boy. You get a prize. Me."

 

Justin groaned; he could feel 'his prize' poking him in the ass and it was making him horny as hell – not a good condition to have in the middle of his workday. "I can see that," he quipped as he heard Brian chuckle slightly at his response. "Or rather, _feel_ it." He huffed. "Brian – I mean it; I HAVE to go NOW."

 

He heard Brian sigh in resignation; readying himself to be released from the sexy man's grasp, he felt Brian loosen his hold on him as he prepared to leave, wondering how he could possibly hide the major boner he was currently sporting now. As he glanced around for his jacket, he found himself actually disappointed that Brian had given in, even though he knew he couldn't stay any longer. He had to admit, though, it felt amazing being held in this man's strong arms again.

 

Just as he thought he was going to be released, though, he was abruptly turned around and pushed back hard against the tight, chiseled chest; he barely had enough time to catch his breath and place his hands against his captor's shoulders to brace himself before he began to feel Brian's hands roaming ever so slowly, lower and lower, first at the small of his back and then down to the curve of his ass..….. His eyes flew open wide as felt the capable hands begin to knead his flesh and he was finally able to gaze up into the steely, dark-green eyes boring into him lustily. He could feel his face beginning to flush and the heat burning up his skin as he shivered from the sensation. "Brian….." Had the man not heard anything he had said?

 

The sexy man smiled down at him triumphantly; he liked the sound of his name on those luscious lips. "Don't worry, I'll let you go, _Florence_ …..after you provide me with a demonstration of your CPR skills again."

 

Justin licked his lips nervously, noticing Brian's eyes darkening immediately in reaction. He knew he shouldn't do it – fuck, they were in the middle of a busy hospital with the door wide open leading out into a fairly busy hallway; this wasn't like the isolated employee elevator from yesterday. But, damn, if he wasn't able to resist this irresistible force known as Brian Kinney….his very own sexy _Leroy_.

 

Brian stared into the ocean-washed, blue eyes intently. "What's it going to be, _Justin_? I'm prepared to stand here all day, if that's what it takes to wear you down." Truthfully, he really couldn't; he still had to go see Gus and then run over to Kinnetik for a while, but he wasn't about to tell Justin that, not if it got him what he so urgently wanted. He watched the blond turn his head slightly to look around him, no doubt making sure they were alone, before a soft breath of destiny escaped the perfect lips and he felt Justin almost imperceptibly leaning up on his tiptoes toward his mouth in a silent invitation of encouragement.

 

Brian amazingly felt his own heart begin to beat faster as he realized he was finally within sight of his target, knowing that Justin wanted this as much as he did; he had never had to work so hard for a kiss before but he was finding the wait had made the reality that much more anticipated. This time, though, instead of a smashing of lips, this kiss was going to be even more memorable, he decided, as he lowered his head to stare down into the intense blue eyes for a few seconds before he slowly leaned in to bestow just the soft whisper of contact against the soft, full lips. He heard an almost imperceptible sigh in response and was jolted by the lurch that suddenly appeared within his heart at the sound. _How did it get to this point so quickly? How did it get to this point at ALL? He never allowed his own feelings to enter into the quotient when he was toying with another man…._

 

As he leaned back again and found himself almost drowning in the hypnotic blue eyes staring back at him, though, he realized this was not going to be a typical experience in the life of Brian Kinney, the cavalier, dominating, always-get-what-I-want man; this was becoming a lot more important to him than that. From the first moment he had gazed at this man now being held in his arms and watched him take such tender care of his son, to the first time they had finally kissed yesterday, Justin had been dwelling in a deep place inside his soul, the emotions waiting until the time was right to act upon the power he had over him. Well, it seems that the time was now, because his heart was beating erratically in time with his own jumbled emotions as he stared back into the beautiful face looking at him in befuddlement over his hesitation.

 

"Brian….." Justin whispered, barely audibly. The air felt thick with anticipation – was the brunet playing with him? Why wasn't he kissing the living daylights out of him right now? Wasn't that what he wanted, too? Well, he didn't have much time to try and analyze the complexity known as Brian Kinney; perhaps it was time to quit struggling against the inevitable and encourage him a little. Taking a small breath of courage and a leap of faith that they both wanted the same thing, he took the initiative to reach one hand up to the back of Brian's neck, feeling the hair there amazingly soft as he tentatively feathered it through his long fingers. He ever so slightly pulled on Brian's neck in an unspoken invitation to kiss him again, hoping – no, _knowing_ – he would understand intuitively what he wanted.

 

Brian gazed into Justin's eyes for a couple of seconds before he answered the blond's quest, leaning in to meet him halfway this time for a deeper kiss; as their lips touched firmly, Brian began to slowly glide his mouth over Justin's lower lip, wetting it thoroughly with just the tip of his tongue as he tentatively sought entrance. Any other time, he would have simply plunged into some trick's mouth if that was what he wanted and the man would have simply obeyed his demand unquestioningly. This time, though, he couldn't imagine making that imposition on this man. As Justin opened his lips in response, Brian didn't stop to question that amazing epiphany as his pulse raced and he quickly plunged inside for a sweet taste of what was hiding inside.

 

As they continued to kiss, Brian's arms slowly crept up from Justin's ass to the small of his back so he could pull him in even impossibly closer; he angled his head to deepen the kiss as much as possible while Justin grabbed onto Brian's head from behind and held it in a tight grip while his other hand remained imprisoned against Brian's chest, feeling both their hearts beating rapidly like the wings of a falcon in synchrony together. He heard someone moan, not sure if it was him, Brian, or both of them as everything and everyone else was quickly forgotten and he lost himself in this wondrous feeling rushing through him.

 

The kiss went on much longer than Justin had planned; but once they began he found he couldn't get enough. Finally, though, more out of a need to breathe than a need for decorum, he finally used his one hand to push back slightly enough from Brian to detach himself from the other man to gaze into his darkened eyes. He felt the same tingle on his lips as before like they were numb from some euphoric type of anesthesia as he gazed up into the greenish-gold orbs that were open and dilated as they stared back at him silently.

 

Justin blushed slightly at the outright look of desire written there, feeling almost heady from the power he realized he had over this confident, glorious-looking man. "I…..I have to go, Brian," he managed to utter breathlessly, unable to keep the regret from his voice. "They'll come looking for me soon."

 

Everyone in the hospital knew he spent part of his day up here; if he didn't get busy soon with room preparations, they would be up here searching for him, and the last thing he wanted was for one of them to find him inside the recreation room in the throes of a kiss and clinch with this sexy man, even though every fiber of his body at the moment was dying to scream out at them – _Eat your heart out…!_

 

Brian's lips, still swollen and almost bruised from their kiss, twisted upward. "Yeah, I know," he answered softly. "I have to go see Gus anyway."

 

Justin nodded, pushing a little more on Brian's chest as a subtle hint that he really did have to go but hating to part nevertheless. "Tell him I said hello and I'll be in a little later with his lunch," he told Brian as he began to remove himself from the other man's embrace until only one of their hands were clasped together.

 

Just as Justin pulled entirely free, Brian unexpectedly grasped his wrist. As Justin turned back to look at him in puzzlement, Brian told him with a sexy smirk, "By the way, Florence, I just wanted you to know; you passed your CPR test with flying colors. You can _teach_ me any day."

 

Justin huffed softly as he gently pulled his arm away, saying, "I think you've already mastered that."

 

"Never hurts to practice," Brian pointed out with a smile. "Will you be bringing Gus his dinner tray later, too?" he asked, finding a way to subtly determine if Justin would be working then as well.

 

But to his disappointment, the blond shook his head regretfully. "No…..I'm only working the day shift this week."

 

He nodded, trying hard to appear unaffected by Justin's statement, but inside he was frustrated that he and his favorite orderly wouldn't be able to 'practice' their CPR later. "Well, pencil me in for another 'class' tomorrow then," he told the blond firmly. "Once we've mastered that one, we can move on to 'harder and deeper' subjects." He smiled as he watched a pink flush spread all over Justin's face in response. He loved getting that reaction from Justin….

 

Justin began to back up, anything to distance himself from this man that was driving him insane with desire. He quickly retrieved his jacket, draping it over his arm and holding it out in front of him in what he hoped was a casual stance. By the look of amusement on Brian's face, however, he knew he wasn't fooling the other man for a minute. "Uh….I've gotta go," Justin told him again, this time meaning it as he began to walk backward, still unable to turn around just yet and leave this man standing in front of him, though.

 

Brian nodded. "Okay….Have a chocolate milk on me, Florence," he quipped. "Later."

 

Justin grinned. "Later," he whispered, as he finally turned around and walked out of the room, still feeling not only Brian's lips that had ravaged his, but also the man's intense stare that was no doubt admiring his ass. He smiled at the thought of both as he turned to the right and proceeded to walk down the hall toward the employee elevators, his step just a little lighter than before.

 

Brian paused for a moment, almost subconsciously reaching up to touch his mouth with his fingers as he recalled the amazing feeling of kissing Justin Taylor's talented mouth. God, he had NEVER had this reaction to any other man before; what was happening to him? Where did the _I-don't-give-a-fuck_ Brian Kinney that everyone knew and adored go? _I know where he went,_ Brian thought to himself. _He went right out the fucking door the moment I saw Justin in the emergency room_. The unbelievable thing of it all, though, was that it didn't bother him; in fact, the thought of spending more time with the beautiful blond excited him; it made him almost aching for more; and it made him horny as hell. The sooner he could have a taste of that incredible ass and bite, fuck, rim and suck every ounce of that compact, slim, pale body the better.

 

He chided himself suddenly, realizing there was one _other_ important male in his life that needed attention, too; his son, Gus. While he was ecstatic and tremendously relieved that his little boy was going to be all right, he knew he had a ways to go yet. Just because Gus was a lot better and on his way to a full recovery didn't mean he was going to neglect him.

 

He glanced up at the clock over the recreation room's door, startled to realize he had been in the room for close to 30 minutes with 'Florence.' Justin seemed to have a way of making him forget about a _lot_ of things lately. "Fuck!" he swore under his breath. Rushing over to the door, he took off in the same direction as Justin toward his son's room, intent on visiting his child before he had to head on to Kinnetik. If all went as planned, though, he had another 'CPR' session to look forward to tomorrow….

 

* * *

 

Fifteen Minutes Later – Chief of Staff's Office

 

Martin McKenzie, the hospital's chief of staff, sighed as he looked up in response to a commotion in the outer reception room of his office; he knew he should have closed the door earlier when he had the chance. He immediately recognized the unhappy leer of his newest chief surgeon, Douglas Swanson, speaking to his personal assistant, Kelly.

 

Swanson had been recruited from another prestigious children's hospital just outside Boston with great fanfare, even though McKenzie had actually had reservations about the man. He had heard some unsubstantiated rumors from fellow colleagues in the Boston area that the man was extremely pigheaded, opinionated, and difficult to get along with. But he was brilliant at what he did, and the hospital had been sorely in need of someone with Swanson's credentials when their other chief surgeon had left to take a position overseas. One thing McKenzie realized was that having important, influential medical personnel on staff also translated to huge funding windfalls as a result, so when it had come time to vote for hiring the rather unpleasant, domineering man, he had reluctantly gone along with the others.

 

Now, though, as he looked at the man's expression of disdain on his face as he sternly spoke to his assistant, who was doing her best to stall him, he wondered if he had done the right thing after all.

 

"But, Sir, he asked not to be disturbed," Kelly was saying to no avail. "I'd be glad to have him get back with you just as soon as he's finished with his work."

 

Swanson huffed. "Nonsense! I'm a surgeon, Missy. I don't have time to _schedule a fucking appointment!_ "

 

"It's all right, Kelly," McKenzie called out through the open doorway. "Send Dr. Swanson in." He had just enough time to pick up his lukewarm mug of coffee and take a calming sip before the tall, rather gangly, dark-brown haired man strode in like he was some commandant directing a battle and shut the door none too softly as he entered. "McKenzie! You have to do something!" he demanded, his eyes narrowed in disgust as he stared at the other man, his hands on his hips. He stood there rigidly, waiting for the other man to acknowledge his concern.

 

McKenzie sighed. What was the man bitching about _now_? Last week he had been upset because the hospital hadn't ordered his favorite brand of surgical gloves; the week before that, he had been irritated because the hospital had switched to fluorescent lights in the surgical theater rather than keep the incandescent ones. What now? "What do you need, Doctor?" he asked calmly, trying hard to keep the irritation out of his voice but finding it difficult.

 

"What I NEED is to be able to work in a hospital that has decorum." He leaned over McKenzie's desk with both arms to support his weight. "I just won't have it, McKenzie!"

 

"What are you talking about?" the other man said curtly, definitely out of patience over playing a game of twenty questions with the pompous, overbearing genius.

 

"That…that _orderly!_ " Swanson huffed out in annoyance, his dark-brown eyes flashing in anger.

 

The other man rolled his eyes, not caring if it bothered his chief surgeon or not. "We have several _dozen_ orderlies, Doctor," he stated quietly. "Can you be more specific? Which one?"

 

"I don't know his fucking name!" the man said. "Nor do I want to! He's conducting himself in an outrageous manner, though, and I won't sit still for it, McKenzie!"

 

"Would you please sit down, _Doctor_ , and explain exactly what this unnamed orderly has done?" McKenzie politely requested, trying fervently to control himself; he was quickly becoming fed up with this conceited do-gooder by the second, however. He had much more important budget matters to address at the moment, and this man was not helping him achieve his goal of getting his initial budget for next year completed by the end of the work day.

 

He watched for a few seconds silently until finally the other man huffed in aggravation and sat down heavily. "He's made a mockery out of this hospital," Swanson began. "He's flaunting himself all over the hospital and giving it a sullied reputation! This needs to be handled now!"

 

"Again, _Doctor_ , exactly what has this orderly done to 'sully' the reputation of the hospital?"

 

Swanson lowered his voice to as he leaned in to stare at the Chief of Staff; in a scorn-laden voice, he responded, "He's a fairy; a queer. And he's flaunting it all over the hospital. I won't stand for it, I tell you!" he repeated firmly.

 

McKenzie sighed; he could care less if one of their orderlies was gay – it was none of his business – but still as the chief of staff he had to at least investigate concerns, especially when it involved his highly-paid and highly-skilled Chief Surgeon. "Just what was he doing, Doctor?"

 

Swanson scrunched up his nose as if he were smelling something distasteful. "I saw him for the first time yesterday – near the employee elevators. I was coming up from the ground floor and was in one of the cars that stopped on the second floor to let someone on. When the door opened, I saw this orderly _kissing_ another man! It was disgusting; the other man had him pinned up against the wall and they…..they were _grinding_ against each other, just like some freak show! The man with him made some flippant remark to me about moving on – that he had changed his mind – so I immediately slapped the button to shut the door and go on up to my office on the fourth floor. I could have almost forgotten the incident yesterday, except for it happened again today! I fucking couldn't believe it!"

 

"What happened today?" McKenzie asked wearily, wanting so much to be somewhere else – _anywhere else_ –at the moment but knowing in his capacity as Chief of Staff that it was out of the question. He placed one hand on either side of his head at his temples as he felt the first tendrils of a severe headache beginning to appear.

 

"I was walking past the recreation room for the patients on the second floor a little while ago and happened to glance inside. The two of them were doing it again! Right in view of anyone who might be walking by! They fucking didn't care who saw them! I'm telling you, McKenzie, this is a serious breach of employee etiquette and projects the wrong kind of image for this facility. I expect you to do something about this immediately!"

 

McKenzie shook his head slightly; he really disliked this man intensely, but he had a point; whether it was a heterosexual couple or a gay couple, that sort of demonstrative behavior among employees while on duty was unacceptable and was cause for either disciplinary action or worse, termination. "All right," he finally said in resignation. "I'll check into it," he advised.

 

"I want you to do more than _check into it_ ," the brunet stated unequivocally. "I want him out of here."

 

"Doctor, the man deserves a chance to defend himself before any further action is taken," he advised the haughty man. "But I still need a name." He reached over to pull an employee directory out of his bottom in-and-out basket, leafing through it until he came to the names of facility members, grouped by profession. He paged through a few pages until he reached the subdirectory for the hospital's orderlies. Handing the directory over to the other man with the page open for the orderly listing, he said, "Take a look at these and see if you can identify the orderly you're talking about."

 

He watched intently as the man almost violently leafed through several pages of colored photos of the orderlies presently employed by the hospital until he noticed the man's eyes light up in recognition. "There! He's the one! That's definitely him!" he declared forcefully. He turned the directory around and jabbed a finger down onto one particular photo. "That's the pervert right there – Justin Taylor. And I want him fired – NOW."

 


	11. Truth - and Consequences

“Dr. McKenzie?  Justin Taylor is here to see you,” Kelly told the chief of staff through the intercom.  McKenzie sighed silently; he dreaded these types of disciplinary tasks, but it was part of his job.  Before he made up his mind what to do, though, he needed to find out Taylor’s side of the story, because as much as he disliked having to dish out unpleasant news to someone, he disliked his pompous chief surgeon even more. 

 

“Send him in, Kelly,” he told his assistant, closing his laptop down on his desk in preparation for his meeting.  A few seconds later, he saw his office door open and Kelly step aside to allow the orderly to enter.  He immediately recognized him as the man Swanson had identified yesterday from the hospital directory; the blond-haired man was wearing the standard white uniform of one of their orderlies as he walked in.  “Thanks, Kelly, that will be all,” he told the young woman as she nodded and quietly closed the door, leaving him alone with the somewhat nervously-looking, blond man.  “Please, have a seat, Mr. Taylor,” he directed Justin.

 

As Justin nodded and approached his desk, the man waited until he had seated himself in one of the butter-leather chairs facing him before speaking any further.  “I don’t believe we’ve met.   I’m Martin McKenzie, the Chief of Staff here.  And you’re an orderly here at the hospital, correct?”

 

Justin eyed him curiously; his heart was beating faster just by virtue of being in the same room with the man who was in charge of operating the entire hospital.  He had often heard Dr. McKenzie’s name being bandied about throughout the facility in one regard or another, but actually being inside his richly-appointed inner sanctum was akin to snagging a visit to the Pope; when Cathy McDonald had called him over downstairs to the ICU nurses’ station to tell him that the Chief of Staff was looking for him, he thought she was pulling his leg.  As he sat there being scrutinized by the older man, however, he knew it was true.  Now all he had to do was find out the reason why he would want to see him.  “Yes, that’s right,” he finally found his voice to reply. 

 

The doctor smiled politely in an attempt to try and put Justin at ease; he knew how intimidating being ‘called to the principal’s office’ could be, and his intention was not to make this into some kind of inquisition.  “And how long have you been working here, Mr. Taylor?”

 

Justin wiped his hands on his pants, trying to remove some of the sweat that was quickly appearing.  “About six months,” he told him. 

 

McKenzie nodded.  “And you like working here, Mr. Taylor?”

 

Justin’s eyebrows narrowed slightly as he tried to find out why the man was intent on playing a game of twenty questions with him.  Deciding directness was perhaps the best path to take, he responded,  “Doctor….. May I ask just why you wanted to see me?  And the name’s Justin.”  _Mr. Taylor_ made him feel like he was sixty years old, although at times he certainly felt that way after a long day of working here.

 

The doctor nodded again.  “Justin.  Well, I guess that’s a fair question.  Justin, you work part time in the recreation area of the hospital from what I understand.  In fact, I’ve read some very positive feedback in your employee file about how good you are with the children there.  I understand you’ve got quite a talent in artistic drawing ability and you use it to help make the children feel better.  That’s a very unique quality to have here – and a very commendable one.  Which makes what I’m about to do even more difficult.”

 

Justin frowned as he glanced over at the doctor; just what was he getting at?  “I don’t understand.  Just why AM I here, Doctor?  I don’t imagine you’re the one who gives out my employee review, so it must be for some other reason.  Am I in some kind of trouble?”

 

“I’ll cut to the chase, Justin.  One of our physicians claims he saw you and another person engaged in an action that may be construed as unseemly by others – once near an employee elevator, and perhaps of even more concern, another time in the recreation area.  Is that true?”

 

Justin’s eyes narrowed in anger.  “Unseemly?”  Obviously he really didn’t need for Dr. McKenzie to elaborate on just what this doctor had seen – it was apparent the man had observed him and Brian kissing.  He silently berated himself, remembering at the time that he had expressed internal misgivings about allowing Brian to do what he wanted to do in such a public place – but at the moment he was more annoyed with the doctor’s choice of words instead.  And truth be told, he hadn’t really done anything to stop Brian – he _wanted_ him to kiss him.

 

To the Chief of Staff’s credit, he did appear somewhat uncomfortable as he explained, “Yes.  This doctor stated that you and a… _companion_ ….were engaging in behavior not appropriate to our hospital setting.”

 

“You mean me and another _man_ ,” Justin said bluntly as he held onto the armrests tightly.  “That’s what the real problem is, isn’t it?”

 

The doctor shook his head firmly.  “No, that’s not it,” he insisted as he briefly steepled his fingers together against his lips and studied the face of his irritated-looking visitor thoughtfully.  “I could care less whether the other party was a man or a woman.  But what I _am_ concerned about is the image of this hospital, Justin, and we have strict policies in place here regarding workplace fraternization between employees.  What you and this other employee do in your private life is your own business, but on hospital grounds it’s another matter.  There is such a thing as proper decorum, and a time and place for what you and this other employee were engaging in.”

 

“But the other man wasn’t an employee,” Justin pointed out softly, not knowing if that mattered or not; despite the doctor’s adamant statement that he didn’t care about his sexual orientation, he obviously still wasn’t pleased with what the other doctor had seen.

 

“He wasn’t?” McKenzie asked, surprised by that revelation; all along he had assumed the other man had to be some person employed by the hospital.   “He doesn’t work here?”

 

Justin shook his head.  “No.”  He hesitated to say anything further, however; just how straightforward should he be with this virtual but very powerful stranger who could literally hold his job in his hands?  He didn’t want to get Brian in trouble, too….

 

“Well, if he doesn’t work here, what was he doing in the recreation room with you?” the doctor asked him curiously.  Normally only employees and patients were permitted in that area of the hospital.

 

Justin licked his lips nervously, deciding he had to tell at least part of the truth no matter what the consequences were.  “He’s…..the father of one of our patients,” he explained quietly, looking down in his lap to avert his gaze.

 

McKenzie’s eyes widened; he was not expecting that particular piece of information.  “I see,” he finally said at last, trying hard to keep the surprise of out his voice.  That would have been the last thing he expected Taylor to say.  He cleared his throat as Justin finally raised his head to stare back at him.  “Well, the employee fraternization policy wouldn’t really apply in this case.”  Before Justin could let out a sigh of relief, though, he added, “However, I still don’t think that is the proper image we want to project in this hospital, Justin.”  As Justin opened his mouth to protest, he hastily added, “And again, I’m not talking about your sexual orientation – I would be just as concerned about the hospital’s image if the doctor had reported seeing you engaging in the same type of behavior with a female, also.” 

 

Justin sighed anxiously; he really needed this job to pay for his school.  “It was just some kissing,” he protested softly.  “That’s all.”

 

McKenzie nodded politely.  “I believe you….that’s all the doctor reported seeing as well.  But surely you can recognize how this type of behavior is not appropriate in such a public setting as a hospital?”

 

Justin swallowed hard.  “I suppose,” he grudgingly admitted.  “So what exactly are you saying, Sir?”

 

The chief of staff sighed; he knew Swanson wanted the orderly fired, nothing more, nothing less.  But he had looked over the young man’s file carefully prior to this meeting, and in the short time he had been here Justin had been an exemplary employee; in fact, several parents of the patients he had tended to had gone out of their way to write the hospital to express their gratitude for his caring and kindness while their children had been hospitalized, pointing out how he went above and beyond his appointed duties to make their seriously-ill loved ones happy if only for a short time.  The hospital _needed_ more employees like this young man; but it _also_ needed the skills of their cocky, talented Chief Surgeon.  The question was how he was going to be able to reconcile the two….  

 

He noticed the blond eyeing him anxiously, apparently concerned about his future with the hospital.  “I’m sorry, Justin, but I’m going to have to suspend you for a week without pay.  The hospital has clear policies in the handbook regarding these types of distractions and what constitutes inappropriate conduct; I feel this falls within those bounds.  I will have my secretary write up a warning for your file; you will be able to return to work one week from tomorrow, and if nothing else occurs it will just be a brief blip in your file.  I hope you can understand my position.  I feel you’re a real asset to this hospital, but I still have to follow our policies and procedures.”

 

Justin closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath, trying to think before he possibly said something he would regret.  He supposed it could have been worse, but he still felt terrible.  It wasn’t that he felt he had done anything particularly wrong, but still, being called out for something the hospital felt was inappropriate made him feel like he was about six inches tall.  And the week without pay was going to hurt – a lot.  He was living paycheck-to-paycheck as it was…. 

 

“Doctor…..I understand you have a job to do, but isn’t there any other way?  I really need my salary.”

 

The doctor peered over at him sympathetically.  “I’m sorry, Justin, but part of my job is to perform duties that are not very pleasant ones; this definitely falls into that category.  I have to uphold the rules of the hospital, and this is the least punitive discipline I can administer.  Again, I hope you understand.  My assistant already has the statement drawn up; if you will stop by her desk on the way out and sign it, she will get you a copy.  It doesn’t state that you admit any wrongdoing; it merely reports what was observed and that you understand what the consequences are.”

 

Justin slowly stood up, realizing their meeting was coming to an end.  “It seems that way to me, Doctor,” he said softly in a firm voice as he nodded once before quietly turning to go.

 

McKenzie watched the young man leave, his shoulders set in an angry stance.  He supposed he couldn’t really blame him, but he was placed in an impossible situation.  When all was said and done, he had no choice if he was to follow hospital procedure as well as mollify their most important surgeon.  He just wished this one time he had been given an alternative to resolving the issue, because the decision he had made left him feeling distinctly disgusted with himself as well as Swanson.  _I hope you’re happy, Swanson_ , he thought as he observed the young man leave his office and stop out in the reception area.  He watched as he picked up the disciplinary paper, read it, and then place it down on his assistant’s desk before picking up a nearby pen and angrily scrawling his name on it.  The blond fidgeted restlessly back and forth on his feet for a few seconds as he waited for the copy to be made before he obtained it and abruptly turned to walk out.  Shaking his head in frustration, McKenzie slowly flipped his laptop back open and tried to return to his work, wondering once more about the true meaning of value and fairness.

 

\-------------------------------

_Second Floor – Fifteen Minutes Later – 2:00 p.m._

Justin angrily balled up the wad of bedding he had just removed from one of the patient’s beds and threw it into the nearby hamper.  “Shit!” he cried out to no one in particular; he was so frustrated at the moment, he could scream.  He didn’t know who he was the angriest with:  the anonymous doctor who had reported him, McKenzie, Brian, or himself.  He couldn’t believe the Chief of Staff had suspended him for a week without pay!  He bit one fingernail with his teeth as he stood there; what was he going to do now?  He couldn’t live without one week of his pay.  He had barely enough saved up to last him until his next payday; he was paid retroactively, so at least he would get his full salary when he got paid at the end of the week.  But after that, he would have to find a way to do without his salary for the following period. 

 

He was almost tempted to just quit for the rest of the day so he could leave and not have to see anyone at the hospital for the next week, including Brian.  He sighed.  _Brian_ – couldn’t live with the man and couldn’t live without him.  By the time he was able to come back to work, there was a good chance that Gus would be well enough to be discharged.  Once he was gone, no doubt Brian would be, too.  He would go back to his life and Justin would go back to his – that is, after he was able to _come_ back to work.

 

He supposed he should be grateful that it had been a suspension and not a firing, but it still made him embarrassed and angry as hell.  He wanted to blame it all on Brian, but he couldn’t; if he was completely honest with himself, he could have forced the issue and just told him no.  But he hadn’t wanted to; God, he had _wanted_ Brian’s kisses.  He had wanted ALL of the man…..who wouldn’t?  He was handsome, sexy, assertive, and talented.  He could have any man he wanted; why would he be interested in him, then, especially after finding out he had been suspended from his low-level job?  No, by the time he got back to work, Brian would be gone and so would any chance he might have had to see where their relationship would have led to.  Had he merely been deluding himself that the other man might actually be interested in him?  Or had he been playing him along all this time until he could get into his pants and then drop him like yesterday’s news?  Well, he wasn’t going to find out now; his only excuse for seeing Brian would soon be gone and Gus’ father along with him.

 

“Justin?” He jumped a little at the sound of his name coming from the doorway; he turned around to observe Daphne standing there with a mixture of concern and aggravation on her face.  “Where were you?” she asked as she walked in. “I thought we were going to meet for lunch.”

 

Justin huffed.  “You might say something more important came up.”  _Besides,_ he thought glumly _, with one week’s less pay I’ll need to cut down on eating anyway_. 

 

Daphne smiled teasingly.  “You mean something more important than eating?  I didn’t think there WAS such a thing where you were concerned.”

 

Her friend harrumphed.  “Would a meeting with the Chief of Staff count?”

 

The young resident’s brown eyes flew open in shock as she grasped his shirt sleeve.  “Shit!  Dr. McKenzie?  What in the world would he want to meet with _you_ for?  I mean…well, you know what I mean….”

 

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Justin reassured her.  “That was my thought, too.  Of course, that was before he decided to suspend me for a week without pay.”

 

“What?” she exclaimed loudly.  “Why?”  She began to pull Justin over to the bed as she sat down and he joined her shortly afterward.  “I don’t understand – what in the hell could you have possibly done to get yourself _suspended_?”  She shook her head, totally mystified.  Justin would be the _last_ person she would think of when it came to needing disciplinary action.  He was always going above and beyond what was expected of him and she constantly overheard several of the hospital staff raving about his rapport with the children and his ability to put them at ease with his gentle, caring nature. Now he was _suspended_?  “I don’t get it…..What happened?”

 

He gazed into her eyes pensively, pursing his lips in an apparent dilemma as to just how much to tell her.  He trusted Daphne, though, even if she _did_ go a little overboard with her matchmaking efforts.  “It seems one of the doctors here caught me and Brian together a couple of times, once near the employee elevator the other day and earlier today in the children’s recreation area.”

 

Daphne couldn’t help the amused, smug smile that broke out on her face despite her friend’s woes; she had a definite ‘gotcha’ look on her face as Justin’s face began to turn red.  “You…and _Brian_?  Shit, Justin!  This doctor didn’t catch you, uh, you know….”

 

“No!” Justin instantly retorted, aghast.  “All we were doing was _kissing_ – we weren’t fucking!” he said, quickly lowering his voice for fear someone out in the hallway would overhear; he figured he was in enough trouble at the moment already without adding to the fire.  “That’s all, I swear.”  He sighed and turned his head to stare out the room’s window, noticing the day was quickly clouding up.  He thought that was quite appropriate in light of his present, gloomy mood.  He turned back to face his friend, who had plastered on more of a sympathetic expression now as she noticed how worried he look.  “Fuck, Daphne!  I just live paycheck-to-paycheck as it is.”  He raked one slender hand restlessly through his hair as he added softly, “I really needed that money.  What am I going to do now?”

 

“I’m so sorry, Justin….really.  Look, I have a little saved up….”

 

But Justin firmly shook his head.  “No, Daphne.  Thanks – I really mean that – but I need to find a solution on my own.  Besides, you’re always complaining about how expensive your books and other medical supplies are.  I can’t take your money only to find out I’ve put _you_ in a bind, too.”  He sighed once more wearily.  “I’ll figure something out.  I’ll get one more paycheck before they deduct that week out.   Maybe I can think of something before then.”  Although, with a father who had totally disowned him and a mother who was barely scraping by herself, the prospects of such a miraculous event seemed dim at best…..

 

He stood up and smiled down at her fondly.  “Don’t worry, I’ll figure something out.”  At least his friend had served to calm him down somewhat; he had gone from being angry to feeling more resigned now.  “I’d better finish up my shift before I get into _more_ trouble.  I’m sorry I forgot about lunch.  Maybe we can do it again sometime soon – but better make it _after_ I come back from getting the boot temporarily.”

 

Daphne reached up to grab her friend’s arm before he could leave.  “Justin….don’t worry about missing lunch.  I’m just sorry you got into trouble over Brian.”  She added sheepishly, “I guess I shouldn’t have pushed you two together.”

 

Justin twisted his mouth upward.  “It’s not your fault, Daphne.  It wasn’t like you forced me to kiss him.”

 

Daphne couldn’t help grinning.  “So you two really do like each other.”

 

Justin huffed.  “I’m not sure _what_ you’d call it,” he admitted.  “I’m attracted to him – I mean, shit, who wouldn’t be?”  He sighed once more.  “I just don’t know what to make of him.  I’m not sure if he really cares about me as a person or if he’s just fascinated by his latest possible conquest.  I’m afraid that once he gets what he wants, that’ll be the end of it.  I don’t think it matters now anyway, because I think by the time I get back to work, his son will be gone from the hospital and so will Brian.”

 

“I don’t think you give yourself enough credit, Justin,” his friend gently chided him.  “Any man would be lucky to have you for their partner.”

 

Justin chuckled slightly.  “I’d have a long way to go from where I’m at to being his _partner_.  But thanks anyway, Daphne – you’re a good friend.”  He looked around the presently-empty room.  “I’m actually going to miss being around the kids most of all.  They need me, Daphne – and I need them.”

 

“I know,” she whispered painfully.  Her eyes flashed in sudden determination.  “I’m going to go up to Dr. McKenzie and give him a piece of my mind right now!”

 

Justin’s eyes pleaded with her.  “No, Daphne!  I don’t want you to get into trouble, too!  He’s just doing his job and abiding by the rules.  I don’t think he’s really to blame – it’s more the doctor who felt like he had to report me.  Please – don’t get yourself into trouble, too, on my account.  Your residency is a lot more important than my orderly job.”

 

“Okay,” she reluctantly agreed as she sighed.  “I’ll do as you ask.  But I’m still pissed off royally at both the doctor who reported you _and_ Brian!  He should have known not to conduct himself that way in a hospital!  He owns his own business, doesn’t he?  What was he thinking – he should have known it might get you into trouble!”

 

“I was as much to blame as he was,” Justin stated firmly, shaking his head.  “I could have said no, but I didn’t.”  Even now, he could almost feel Brian’s soft, talented lips roaming all over his mouth, gaining entrance and taking possession of both his body and his heart.  Why did he ever let himself get so attached to him?  For all he knew, today would be the last time he would ever see him again…..

 

He walked over to his rolling, portable cart and grasped the rounded handle as he faced his friend.  “I’d really better get going now, or they’re apt to fire me _permanently_.  I’ll call you, okay?  On second thought, maybe with your schedule you’d better call _me_ ,” he added with a soft smile.

 

She watched him leaving from her position on the bed with a wistful smile and a sudden appearance of tears in her eyes.  She knew the truth – the biggest loser in this whole situation was going to be the hospital, not Justin.  While he was gone, his loss would be felt most keenly by the children who adored him.  She only wished there was something she could do…… “I will,” she promised.  “Take care of yourself and I’ll see you when you get back, okay?”

 

He nodded once before she watched him disappear out of sight.  Sighing in disgust, she stood up and rushed out of the room, knowing others would soon be looking for her as well.

 

======================================

_One Hour Later – 4:30 p.m._

 

Justin really had no idea why he was standing in front of Gus Kinney’s room.  He wasn’t even the orderly scheduled to bring the little boy’s dinner to him, but he had finagled a way to do it anyway.  As he stood near the child’s door, he knew deep down the reason why – he was hoping somehow that Gus’ father would be there, too.

 

As he peeked in the door, however, his heart fell as he noticed Brian missing; the women, Mel and Lindsay, were alone with their son, who was sitting up in bed looking amazingly alert for someone who only a short time ago had literally been on death’s door.  He _was_ glad that the child was going to be okay, but he was also sad to realize that the man he had come to feel such an attraction to would no longer be in his life anymore.

 

He forced himself to affix a polite smile on his face as he walked into the room and was greeted by both mothers warmly.  He had to smile broadly at Gus, though, who held his kitten up for him to see.  The little boy had taken the miniature pair of scrubs that Justin had commandeered from the gift shop and had dressed his latest, favorite toy in the camouflage-design duds.  The scrubs were actually meant to be used for dolls, but Justin figured they would work on a stuffed animal, too; he was delighted to see that he had been right – they were a perfect fit for ‘Fluffy.’

 

“Look, Orly!” Gus shouted excitedly.  “I got him all dressed up now!”

 

Justin laughed as he placed the little boy’s tray down on the patient table.  “I see that….he looks quite handsome, Gus,” he told the child, who beamed at the compliment. 

 

“Orly?” Mel asked curiously, noticing the moniker that her son had used to greet Justin with.

 

Justin smiled.  “Something tells me he thinks that’s my name, because he hears everyone calling me o _rderly_ all the time,” he explained.  “It’s okay – I don’t mind,” he reassured the two women, who laughed.  “I kind of like it.”  He smiled back once more at the child.  “Looks like someone’s getting better by the hour.”  His voice took on a certain tone of melancholy as he added softly, “I think he’ll be able to go home soon at the rate he’s going.”

 

The two women exchanged a curious glance as Lindsay told him, “Yeah.  As a matter of fact, Dr. Broderick was just in a little while ago and said he will probably get to go home in a couple of days.”

 

Justin nodded, looking over at the little boy who reminded him so much of his father.  “That’s great,” he said, trying to sound enthusiastic but not quite succeeding.  “I’m happy for you – all of you.”

 

Lindsay nodded.  “Brian will be so excited when he finds out.  He should be here in about an hour.”  She glanced over at Mel with a twinkle in her eye; she knew this young man had a major crush on Brian.  She wasn’t sure whether to encourage him or not, though, not really knowing what Brian’s true motives were.  But she thought she might have just caught a glimmer of real interest in her long-time friend’s eyes, at least she hoped so, because this man apparently definitely felt something for him. 

 

Mel shook her head imperceptibly as she caught Lindsay’s eyes; she really didn’t feel it was wise to encourage Justin – knowing Brian he was only bound to get hurt, and this young man really seemed like a decent person.  She would hate for him to get his heart broken by someone who only believed in one-night stands.  To her relief, Justin simply nodded and said, “I’m sure he will be.  Uh…I’d better be going; I’ve got some other trays to deliver.  If you’ll excuse me…..”  He nodded once at the two women before waving to Gus with a smile and turning to go.  Just before he did, however, he stopped and turned around to stare at the two women a little uncomfortably.

 

“Could you do me a favor?” he asked softly.  “Would you give something to Brian when you see him?” 

 

The two women glanced at each other before Lindsay smiled back at him reassuringly.  “Sure….we’ll be glad to,” she said as Justin reached over and grabbed a flat envelope lying on the lower shelf of the lunch tray cart.  He picked it up and leaned over to hand it to Mel.   He smiled over tenderly at Gus before whispering, “Bye, Buddy.  It was great meeting you.  Nice meeting both of you, too,” he added with a nod before he grasped the rolling cart and quickly turned around to leave before his emotions betrayed him.

 

“Gus should be here for a couple more days,” Lindsay pointed out before he could exit.

 

Justin stopped and stood there for a second or two before he turned around briefly to tell her, “I won’t be here at work for the next two days,” not choosing to discuss exactly why.  “Take care, Little Guy,” he added, waving back at Gus before he rolled the cart out the door and left before his face gave away how much he was going to miss seeing the beautiful little boy – and also his father.

 

As Justin disappeared out of sight, Mel opened the brown envelope’s open flap and peered inside. 

 

“Mel…..That was supposed to be for Brian,” Lindsay admonished her.

 

Mel shrugged.  “The envelope’s open,” she pointed out.  “I just want to make sure Justin doesn’t get hurt by that asshole.”  Lindsay shook her head in disagreement as her partner pulled out an ivory-colored, flat piece of paper and Mel gasped as she peered at it.  “My God, Linds…..look at this!”  She reached over the bed and handed the paper to Lindsay as Gus continued to coo to his kitten, unaware of the excitement being generated over an innocuous-looking piece of paper.

 

Lindsay eyes threatened to pop out of her head as she stared at the amazing sketch she held in her hands; it was a casual portrait of their son sitting on a park bench with Brian sitting beside him.  Gus had a delighted look on his face as he held his hands up in a surprised type of posture against a flock of pigeons that were taking flight directly in front of him.  Brian was wearing a dark brown leather bomber jacket, a deep blood-red shirt and blue jeans and had his arm around his son as he laughed affectionately at his son’s wondrous expression.

 

The details of the sketch, from the veins of the leaves on the trees, to the fountain of cherubs streaming water from their hands, even the wood grain on the bench, were amazingly lifelike.  “I……I had no idea,” she whispered in awe as she looked over at Mel.  “He…..he _drew_ this?”  She looked all over the sketch, but couldn’t find a signature to verify her hunch.  “It isn’t signed,” she told her partner, shaking her head in disbelief.  “Mel….this is incredible!  You really think he drew this himself?”

 

Mel raised her eyebrows in a ‘who knows’ type of gesture.  “I’m assuming he did,” she told the other woman.  “But I had no idea he was such a talented artist.  I wonder what in the world he’s doing here working as an orderly?” 

 

Lindsay shook her head.   “That’s just what I was thinking,” she said.  She glanced down once more at the portrait, noticing all the intricate details that had been included, even down to the sparkle in Gus’ eyes.  “This is amazing,” she murmured appreciatively.  “What a wonderful talent he has.  I hope he doesn’t waste it here. This could easily be displayed in an art gallery.” 

 

Mel nodded.  “Well, you know better than I, but it’s so incredibly real,” she marveled as she looked over at the portrait again.  “I only hope Brian appreciates all the work he must have put into that.”

 

“I know he’ll be thrilled with it,” she told Mel, carefully handing the sketch back over to her for safekeeping.  “It’s just a shame Justin couldn’t give it to him personally.  I really think he cares about Brian.”

 

Mel snorted as she started to place the piece of heavy paper back into the envelope.  “I only hope Justin’s not hoping Brian can reciprocate,” she growled softly.  She opened the envelope wider to try and facilitate putting it back in and stopped, frowning slightly.  Placing the sketch down on Gus’ portable rolling table, she reached in to find a white, business-sized envelope nestled inside with the name _Leroy_ written on the front.  “Leroy?” she said, confused, as she looked over at Lindsay. 

 

Lindsay laughed.  “That's the name of the person whose shirt Justin commandeered for Brian to wear, remember?”

 

Mel shook her head in amusement.  “Well, I’ve got to give Justin credit – it’s not everyone who would have the balls to call Brian Leroy.” 

 

“I think Justin is unique in a lot of ways,” Lindsay mused as Mel carefully slid the portrait back into the envelope.  “He just might prove to be a match for Brian after all.”  She knew Mel most likely wouldn’t agree, but Brian wasn’t as devil-may-care and unaffected as he might appear to be.  She knew deep down Brian needed a companion, a partner; he spent far too much time simply satisfying his sexual urges with the ‘trick of the night.’  He needed more than that – he _deserved_ more than that.  Was it just possible that Justin could prove to be that person?  Yes, he was a lot younger, but like Brian, he was passionate about his work, creative and intelligent.  She couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was, but there was something about Justin that made her hope that she just might be right.   How that would be accomplished, however, was the question.

 

Sure enough, as Mel closed the envelope’s flap, she commented, “You know, Linds, maybe it’s just as well that Justin won’t _be_ here for the next couple of days.  I really think he was getting way too attached to Brian, and you know he’s only going to break his heart.  Maybe it’s for the best then.”

 

“You don’t know that, Mel,” Lindsay chided her defensively.  “I really think Brian was beginning to like Justin, and not just as a temporary diversion,” she maintained.  She sighed.  “I guess maybe we’ll never know now, though.”  She gazed over at the envelope.  “Well, we can at least make sure he Justin’s gift, anyway.” 

 

“I guess,” Mel replied somewhat hesitantly.  “It’s a shame he drew Brian in it; I would have liked to have kept that for myself,” she said only half-teasingly.  “He went and spoiled it, though, when he included Brian, too.”

 

“Mel, please,” Lindsay softly scolded her.  “Just once try to be civil around Brian, okay?  He _is_ Gus’ father – and he _did_ probably save his life the other day.”

 

“You’re asking the impossible – why do you think she never tries civil cases?  She doesn’t know the first thing about being _civil_ ,” they heard a sarcastic drawl from the doorway.  Brian walked in and immediately smiled at the sight of his quickly-recuperating son.  “Hey, Sonny Boy!  You’re looking better and better, Buddy!” 

 

“Hi, Daddy!” Gus chirped happily.  “Look what Orly brought me!  Clothes for Fluffy!”

 

He walked over to Gus’ bed and leaned down to kiss his son’s cheek as he gave him a brief hug. 

 

“I see that!” Brian said, standing up; he had no idea who _Orly_ was, but he figured it had to be one of the hospital employees taking care of him.  “He looks very ferocious, Gus,” he told his son with a smile as he peered over at Lindsay.  “The doctor been in yet?” he asked, pulling up a chair toward his son’s bed and placing one of his hands on Gus’ leg, just to feel the reassuring warmth of his son’s body under his touch.  They had had a long, tortuous road since he had brought his little boy into the emergency room, and his heart was feeling so much lighter now that he knew his son was finally going to be just fine. 

 

Lindsay smiled over at him.  “Yes,” she confirmed, “and if he keeps going the way he is, he said he can go home in a couple of days.”

 

Brian beamed in delight.  “That’s great, Sonny Boy!” he told his son.  “And when you get home, we’ll go to the zoo, just like I promised, okay?”

 

His son nodded vigorously.   “Can we take him, too, Daddy?” he asked, holding up his kitten.

 

Brian smiled.  “We sure can, Buddy.  But better keep him away from the bigger cats – he might get scared, okay?” Gus smiled and nodded back at him as he began to swing his kitten by the tail and emit growling noises.  He glanced over at the dinner tray, noting it was mainly finished; he was unable to hide the small expression of disappointment that flashed across his face as he realized he had arrived too late to ‘accidentally on purpose’ run into a certain blond orderly.  “Looks like Gus has already had his dinner,” he observed. 

 

Lindsay had noticed her friend’s look of disappointment on his face as she flashed a quick look at Mel that said _I told you so_ before she nodded and said to Brian, “Yeah…Justin brought his tray in about thirty minutes ago.  He left you something, by the way,” she added as Brian’s head quickly turned around to look at her inquisitively.  “He did?” he asked, trying to sound like he really didn’t care one way or the other, but Lindsay wasn’t fooled at all; she had immediately caught the almost wistful tone in his voice as he realized he had missed seeing Justin earlier.

 

She nodded.  “Mel – give it to him,” she instructed softly as the brunette grudgingly reached over and retrieved the brown envelope to hand it to her Brian who was sitting next to her.

 

Brian eyed the plain envelope curiously.  “What is it?” he asked.

 

“Just open it – we’re not your mail delivery service,” she groused; both women, though, couldn’t hide their curiosity about Brian’s reaction as they watched him open the flap and slide the sketch out to hold it in front of him.  They both thought they heard a sharp intake of breath as Brian stared down at the mesmerizing, realistic portrait of him and his son for several seconds.  When he was finally able to tear his gaze away, he lifted his head to peer over at Lindsay, incredulity written on his face.  “You said Justin left this for me?  He _drew_ this _?”_ He whispered softly, holding onto the edges of the portrait almost reverently so he wouldn’t damage it. 

 

Lindsay nodded.  “Well, there’s no signature, but we’re assuming he did.  Did you know he could draw like that?”

 

Brian shook his head, stealing another gaze at the mesmerizing portrait of his son sitting next to him on a park bench.  The wondrous expression on his sons’ face was so realistic and candid; Justin had captured his son’s bubbly and boisterous personality perfectly, even though he obviously had never seen him outside the hospital in a more natural setting.  And he was amazed that Justin had dressed him in the type of clothing he really _would_ wear; in fact, he had a dark-brown, leather bomber jacket that looked remarkably like the one that he had drawn in the picture hanging up in his closet.  He knew he had a perfect spot for this portrait of him and his son – right on his desk at home where he would see it on a frequent basis.  It was just too exquisitely-drawn not to be able to appreciate it often.  “This……this is incredible,” he admitted softly.  “I had no idea…..”

 

“Neither did we,” Lindsay told him, noticing how entranced Brian seemed to be by the drawing.  “What he’s doing working here as an orderly when he has talent like this is beyond me,” she told him.  “That could be in a gallery – and I think it would sell quickly.”

 

“No fu….no way,” Brian amended his statement, shaking his head firmly.  “I’m not letting this out of my sight.  It’s amazing,” he admitted, staring down at it.  He raised his head to look at his friend and say, “I guess I should go track him down and thank him.  I had no idea he could do that.”

 

“You mean when it comes to art, anyway,” Mel retorted.  “Brian, he has to have a major crush on you.  Why don’t you just let it go before you go and break his heart?  He’s just a lovesick kid.” 

 

“Mel, why don't you just mind your own fu…..your own damn business,” Brian snarled, glancing over at Gus, who fortunately seemed oblivious to their sparring.  “My personal life is none of your concern,” he snapped. 

 

“Mel, Brian, please,” Lindsay said soothingly, trying once more to play peacemaker.  “Let’s discuss this later, okay?  The important thing is making sure that Gus continues to get better.  We can talk about this another time.”  She decided that perhaps her partner and her best friend could use a little separation from each other to cool off.  “Brian – would you mind if Mel and I go grab a bite to eat while you’re here?” 

 

Brian shook his head.  “Go ahead – I’ll stick around until you get back so Gus and I can have a one-on-one man visit, okay, Sonny Boy?”  Gus nodded with a smile as Brian smiled back at him; no matter how foul a mood he might develop, his son’s sweet-looking face and tender smile always served to bring him out of his funk. 

 

The two women stood up to go, Lindsay leaning back to stretch her lower back muscles that had stiffened considerably from sitting too long in one of the hospital’s hard, plastic chairs.  “We’ll be back in a little while, Sweetheart,” she murmured to their son as she leaned down to kiss Gus’ cheek.  She walked around the bed to join her partner. Just before they turned to go, however, Lindsay called over to her friend.  “By the way, Brian, Justin left another envelope for you inside the bigger one – it’s addressed to you – or should I say Leroy.”

 

Brian chuckled softly.  “Yeah…That would be me,” he verified as Lindsay gave him an amused look in return.  “I’ll take a look at it.”  She nodded before she turned to follow Melanie out of the room, leaving Brian alone with his son.  He was dying to know what Justin – or should he say _Florence_ – had written in his note, but he tamped down his eagerness for the moment to spend some precious time with his son.

 

“Daddy…..Can I get some choc’ lit ice cream?” Gus asked, blinking those large, expressive doe-eyes at his father.  Brian grinned.  _Little fucker – You always did know how to get what you wanted out of me…_ He smiled, though, as he got to thinking – perhaps he could accomplish two tasks in one. 

 

“Sure, Sonny Boy,” he replied, reaching over to ruffle the soft, brown hair at the top of Gus’ head and smiling.  “Let me get an orderly to bring you some, okay?”  He grinned conspiratorially, knowing just which ‘orderly’ he had in mind.  “I’ll be right back,” he told his son, striding purposefully out of the room and turning left to head down to the nearby nurses’ station.

 

He noticed what appeared to be a good ‘target’ standing near the counter – a young-looking nurse.  Turning on the Kinney charm, he sauntered up to the counter and waited for the tall, thin blonde female to acknowledge him before he flashed her a winning smile; she predictably smiled back with just a hint of pinkness in her cheeks.  “Excuse me,” he said politely.  “My son is a patient here, and I was hoping you could help me.”

 

The woman blushed even more as she replied a little breathlessly, “Of course.  What can I help you with?”

 

Brian stared into her eyes as if she were the most fascinating creature in the world as he drawled, “My son down the hall is asking for some chocolate ice cream – I was wondering if I could trouble you to get one of the orderlies to fetch him some…..if it wouldn’t be too much trouble.”  He curled his lips under in that little-boy look that always drove women – and men – wild.  This was one time he was really counting on his charm to produce the result he wanted, and he wasn’t disappointed.

 

The young woman smiled as she flirted openly with the handsome man.  “No, no trouble at all.  I wish I could do it myself, but I can’t leave my station,” she said regretfully, “Mr…...?”

 

“Kinney,” Brian said smoothly, not missing a beat.  “Brian Kinney.  My son is Gus – right down the hall there,” he said pointing to his son’s room.

 

The woman nodded.  “I’ll have someone take care of it, Mr. Kinney.” 

 

Brian smiled warmly, continuing to pour on the charm.  “That’s great; thank you, Brittany,” Brian said, eyeing the woman’s name badge and putting it to good use.  He watched the woman bat her eyelashes at him – for all the good it would do her; the only eyes he cared to stare into at the moment belonged to a _different_ type of beautiful blond.

 

The woman smiled at him, totally enthralled.  “You’re welcome.  I’ll have one of the orderlies bring him some right away.”

 

“Good,” Brian said, arriving at the most important part.  “Uh…If possible, _Brittany_ , my son is really partial to one orderly in particular.”  _And so his is dad,_ Brian couldn’t help thinking.  “His name is Justin – Justin Taylor.  Do you know him?” he asked politely.

 

To his great relief, the woman nodded.  “Sure,” she said, smiling.  “He’s a favorite of a lot of the patients here,” she told him.  “I’ll see if he’s available.” 

 

Brian’s heart skipped a beat as he nodded and watched the woman pick up the phone to dial an internal number as she explained what she needed.  He listened intently, holding his breath while she spoke to the person on the phone and virtually crossing his fingers, hoping that one special orderly would soon be coming up to the second floor to deliver ice cream to one patient in particular.   He couldn’t wait to see Justin and express his appreciation for his gift _personally –_ VERY personally.

 

As he waited for her to end her call, Brian thought once more about the sketch Justin had made.  He was still stunned to realize the incredible artistic talent the young blond had.  He had noticed Justin painting something on a young girl’s face earlier today, but he had no idea just how creative and talented he was.  He had to wonder the same thing as Lindsay had – why in the fuck was he wasting such an amazing gift by working here as an orderly?  He decided he needed to do something about that. 

 

He watched in eager anticipation as Brittany hung up the phone and smiled back at him.  “Someone will be bringing up the ice cream for your son shortly,” she told him.

 

Brian tried not to sound too hopeful as he said, “Mr. Taylor?”  His face fell slightly, however, as he noticed the look of regret on the nurse’s face.

 

“No, I’m sorry, Mr. Kinney…..Justin has left for the day – he worked first shift today, so he left at 5:00.  You just missed him.”

 

Brian worked at hiding his extreme disappointment as he said, “Oh, I see.”  He thought furiously as he added, “Well, I’d really like to thank him for helping to take such good care of my son while he’s been here.  Do you know when he’ll be working tomorrow?”

 

The woman looked at him sympathetically.  “I’m sorry, Mr. Kinney.  The person I just spoke to mentioned that Justin won’t be back to work for a week.”

 

“A week?” Brian was stunned to hear that; Justin had been here every day since Gus had been brought in; he didn’t appear to be rolling in money, so how could he afford to just take a week off?  “I’m sorry to hear that – my son will probably be gone by the time he gets back; is he on vacation?” he asked casually, hoping the disappointment didn’t appear in his voice.

 

“I don’t know,” Brittany told him.  “That’s all I was told.”

 

“Well…..okay.  Thanks, Brittany,” Brian told her as he simply walked away.  He had been eagerly looking forward to seeing Justin again, and now it looked like he wouldn’t see him at all before Gus was discharged.  He furiously thought about how he could get in touch with Justin, but he had no idea what his phone number or address was, and something told him the hospital wouldn’t just give it out to him.  Realizing the woman was still staring at him curiously, he nodded politely and turned to start walking down the hallway toward his son’s room, deep in thought about a certain blond who was occupying way too much of his thoughts lately.

 

“I know why Justin is gone for the week,” he heard a familiar voice say abruptly from nearby.  Turning around, he recognized the young resident intern, Dr. Chanders, who had been helping to treat his son since he had brought him into the E.R., standing there, her hands on her hips as she stared back at him.  His initial inclination to smile at her in appreciation for her help faded as he noticed the grim, hostile expression on her face. 

 

His own face turned sober and a sense of dread began to grow in his stomach as he replied, “You do?”

 

She nodded her head, her eyes flashing.  “Yeah, I do.  And it’s all your fault.”


	12. Sorting Through a Tide of Emotions

Brian walked closer to the young brunette, observing her eyes flashing with what appeared to be indignant fury. She stood there staring at him with her slim hands on her hips, a stethoscope hanging around her neck as the name badge clipped to her white jacket pocket reflected off the fluorescent strip lights situated above.

 

"Dr. Chanders," he greeted her politely, noticing the woman had her lips pursed tightly together. Between her facial expression and her rigid body language, it was obvious she was quite perturbed, and her anger seemed to be focused directly at him for some reason. "I was looking for your co-worker to tell him how much I appreciated his taking care of my son while he was sick – looks like he may get to go home in a couple of days according to Dr. Broderick."

 

"I know," was the curt reply, nothing less, nothing more.

 

Brian rolled his eyes slightly, aggravated that it was like pulling teeth to get information out of this young resident. He decided to try again. "Is he taking a week off? He didn't mention that to me."

 

"Not exactly," was her icy and enigmatic reply as she stood there staring at him, the anger in her eyes almost rolling off her in waves.

 

Brian sighed; he apparently was going to have to drag the information out of her. "Okay, then….." he replied hesitantly, trying to remain detached but unable to completely hide the aggravation in his voice. "I'll bite…..Why IS he gone for the week? Studying for mid-terms?"

 

She snorted. "Hardly," she huffed. The words began to tumble out then in a righteous torrent at the thought of what had happened to her friend. "The hospital suspended him without pay for a week, and unlike _you_ , he can't afford it…although you certainly are partly to blame." Looking at Kinney's expensive tailored suit, she didn't have any trouble ascertaining that he wasn't exactly a pauper. By the time Justin was able to return to work, though, HE might be….She couldn't believe she had actually encouraged a possible relationship between her friend and this man. He obviously was the kind that once he got what he wanted, he just threw the person away like so much garbage, and Justin apparently was his latest piece of trash.

 

Brian looked at her in astonishment. Justin _suspended_? This young doctor was apparently blaming him for it, too…..what had happened? Deep down he really didn't have to ask himself that question, though, because somehow he knew. He had to make sure, though…. " _I'm_ to blame? You want to elaborate on that, Dr. Chanders? I hardly think I have the power to influence the hospital's disciplinary policy."

 

Daphne rolled her eyes in disgust. Surely someone as successful-looking as this man wasn't that obtuse. She looked around the hallway, noting that several nurses at their station were apparently quite curious as to what their somewhat heated exchange was in regards to. Spying a patient counseling room nearby, she tilted her head toward it as she said, "Let's discuss this in private."

 

Brian curled his fingers into his palms, finding it curious that he could feel so anxious in front of this petite, fiery young woman. He followed her over to the wooden door and waited for her to open it before preceding her into the room. He walked over and sat down on a vinyl-clad, blue-and-silver standard-issue hospital chair as Daphne closed the door firmly behind her and turned to glare at him. She chose not to sit; she was too agitated at the moment to relax anyway. She finally decided to lean back against the opposite wall to stare over at the brunet, her arms folded across her chest in front of her.

 

Brian, never one to beat around the bush, was actually feeling hesitant in the presence of so much resentment hanging in the room. He ultimately decided directness was the best approach. "Okay…so why did Justin get suspended?" he asked her. "And why am _I_ to blame?"

 

Daphne bit back a tart retort somewhere along the lines of _Well, you look like a smart man, YOU figure it out_ , choosing instead to reply icily, "He was seen in a, shall we say, compromising position by one of the other doctors here and he was reported to the Chief of Staff, who decided to suspend him without pay for a week as punishment. Want to guess just what 'compromising position' he was found in and with whom? Twice?"

 

Brian was astounded – THAT was why they had suspended him? Because the two of them had been kissing? His pride, though, couldn't voice his suspicions aloud as he chose instead to quip, "What? Was he trying to break into the vending machines to steal quarters to pad his salary? I can't blame him – the coffee here is for shit anyway; I think they ought to pay US to drink it."

 

Daphne huffed in irritation. "Go ahead – make fun of his situation. I bet you've never had to scrape by from week to week for one day in your life. Justin's going to be lucky to be able to afford groceries, let alone his rent and utilities when he doesn't get a paycheck next week."

 

"You don't know me at all," Brian told her defensively, his voice suddenly hard as steel as he dropped all pretense. "Don't judge people strictly by how they look. You know nothing about me." Of course, she couldn't have known that he had had an absolutely horrendous childhood and had had to fight tooth and nail to become the successful ad executive and owner of the most prestigious agencies in Pittsburgh that he was now. To her, he just represented someone who had managed to get one of her friends into trouble.

 

Daphne stared into his darkening eyes evenly, meeting him gaze for gaze. "No, I don't," she admitted. "But I know Justin. And he doesn't deserve what he got."

 

"Well, maybe you should go tell the Chief of Staff that then, not me," he pointed out, even though he felt awful that he had inadvertently helped get Justin in trouble. He was really starting to care about Justin, and truthfully, yes, he had wanted to thank him for his gentle, caring treatment of his son, too, but more to the point, he wanted to get to know him better – outside the hospital. He didn't want their relationship – if that's what it could be called at this point – to end just because his son was being discharged.

 

"I offered," was Daphne's surprising reply. "But Justin made me promise not to; he was afraid it would jeopardize my residency here if I did and he didn't want that to happen. As usual, Justin was looking out for others and not himself. He's probably one of the least selfish people I know. Unfortunately, he's also one of the most stubbornly independent ones I know, too."

 

Brian gazed at her thoughtfully. "You offered to loan him some money and he turned you down."

 

She nodded, sighing in frustration; she hated the thought of her friend having difficulty paying his bills or even having enough to eat, and there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it. That didn't make her resolve to put this man in his place any less, though, for helping to put Justin in the predicament he was in. She stared over into his eyes, unable to interpret his indecipherable expression. "Justin wouldn't even consider it," she told him, a touch of pride in her voice over her friend's wish to be self-sufficient. "That's just the way he is. That doesn't lessen the difficulty he's going to have, though."

 

"Because of me, you mean," Brian replied, nervously wiping the palms of his hands back and forth on his linen pants. What a fucked-up mess this is! And how could he resolve it? The easiest method would just be to give Justin enough money to get by for the week, but number one, he had no idea where he lived, and two, something told him he would refuse even if he _did_ offer.

 

"Yes, that's exactly what I mean," she told him. She gave him a derisive laugh. "And to think I actually encouraged him to open himself up to the possibility of a relationship with you. I should have known you don't DO relationships, though, do you?"

 

Brian stood up and slowly walked over to the agitated young resident, silently lauding her for standing up to him, even as he came to within a couple feet of her. "Like I said, _doctor_ , you don't know shit about me. And you don't know how I feel about Justin, either." He brushed one of his hands through his auburn-colored hair, tousling it so that it looked like he might have just awakened from a restless night's sleep.

 

She harrumphed. "All I know is that you've jeopardized his job here, and he not only needs it, but the children need him, too. He really makes a difference in their lives. He made a difference in your _own_ son's life, too."

 

Brian bristled. "I'm aware of that, _Doctor_. And whether you believe it or not, I feel bad about what happened to him." He had no idea why he felt a need to tell a relative stranger this, but he added more softly, "I do care about him, despite what you think. So if you'll just tell me how to reach him, maybe there's something I can do to help him."

 

"You've _helped_ him enough," Daphne told him, unconvinced. How did she know he wasn't just interested in satisfying his sexual needs? After all, from what she had gleaned from Justin, all they had done so far was kiss; perhaps Kinney was upset that he hadn't conquered his latest target yet and was merely wanting to tend to some unfinished business. No, she couldn't take that chance – she cared too much about her friend. She did a sort of sidestep to move away from Brian as she said coolly, "If you'll excuse me, I have to go do rounds now." She walked toward the door to open it, but just before she left, she turned to face Brian and say, "Just leave him alone, Mr. Kinney. He was fine before you got here and he'll be fine afterward; at least if he doesn't go into bankruptcy first." She gave him one more meaningful look before she turned around to open the door and promptly exit, leaving Brian both fuming and concerned. Fuming that this young upstart doctor would make such a hasty, uninformed judgment about him, and also greatly concerned that he had been the cause of Justin's troubles. He supposed she meant well, but she didn't realize how much he was beginning to genuinely care about Justin. Hell, until that moment, he didn't think even _he_ realized how much, either.

 

Yes, he had been attracted to him physically from the start; after all, he wasn't blind to the beauty that was packaged under that rather nondescript orderly uniform. His slender body was perfectly proportioned from head to foot with the exception of one delightfully-larger feature that hadn't escaped his notice, and he had the most intriguing shade of eyes – at times stormy like an angry ocean and then at other times more like a cloudless sky. He had an ass, too, that was just made for fucking, sucking, and rimming by the expert – meaning him, of course. And those marvelously-shaped lips – he had noticed how kissable they were from the moment he had seen them, although at the time he was much more concerned with his son's life. But once he had had the chance to actually steal a sample later, he had found that they tasted even better than they looked.

 

Despite all of his attractive physical features, though, Brian found himself most intrigued by what he _couldn't_ see – Justin's genuine caring and compassion for the littlest of patients, his sharp wit that could give as good as it got, and his kindness. There seemed to be no end to the younger man's commendable qualities, or Brian's quest to learn more about them. Yes, somewhere during his journey of discovery about Justin Taylor, he had started to actually _care_ about him, too.

 

He realized with grudging acceptance that the young resident had been right; he was more than partly responsible for what had happened. No, he hadn't forced Justin to respond to his advances, but he hadn't exactly been shy going after what he wanted, either. That had never been his way, and he had been fighting his attraction to Justin for some time now while his son recovered; it was almost like destiny that at some point they would have had to explore their mutual feelings for each other, because he could tell that Justin was attracted to him, too. A typical orderly wouldn't have gone to all the trouble he had gone to simply out of a sense of compassion for their patient or the patient's father. But now that they _had_ finally allowed their passion to surface, it had only stoked his desire for more. It seemed, though, that while he was going to get off scot free for what the hospital had categorized as an _indiscretion_ , Justin, however, who could ill-afford to go without his job even temporarily, was going to take the brunt of its consequences.

 

He sighed deeply in frustration; unsure of what to do but knowing his son was probably wondering why he hadn't returned yet, he let out a weary breath before walking over to the open door and turning right to head back toward his son's room. He had no idea what he was going to do to make it up to Justin, but his predicament promised to weigh heavily on his mind until a solution could be reached. He desperately wanted to talk to him, to make him understand how sorry he was that he had been the main reason for his difficulties, but he had no way of even contacting him.

 

Hurrying down the hallway, he forced himself to at least temporarily put Justin's problems aside for the sake of his son, vowing to do something to help right things with the blond at the first opportunity.

 

"Hi, Daddy," his son greeted him with a smile as he entered the room; his son's reaction at least caused the ache in his heart and the guilt he was feeling to diminish just a little as he smiled back at him tenderly. He noticed a now-empty cup of chocolate ice cream and a white plastic spoon nearby; apparently Brittany had made good on her promise to have some delivered to him and he had already devoured it.

 

He walked up to rub the top of Gus' head. "Hey, Buddy," he murmured affectionately as he sat down in the chair next to his son and gazed over at the portrait that Justin had drawn of them. The meticulously-drawn artwork merely made his thoughts stray back once more to the creator of it, and what had happened to him….

 

"That's you and me, Daddy," his son pointed out helpfully, nodding his head over toward the flat object.

 

"Yeah, Sonny Boy…..I know," Brian told him softly. He picked up the Justin's drawing he had left on Gus' portable hospital table earlier to study its details. The likenesses of him and his son were amazing, right down to the expression of tenderness on his face as he looked at his little boy, and the look of delighted wonder Gus wore as he watched the pigeons taking flight. No pencil stroke had been left undone in the candid snapshot of them– he could see every button on their shirts, even the shoelaces on Gus' sneakers and the ribs in the denim fabric of his son's jeans. Justin had drawn a sun shining brightly above them, the rays pouring downward highlighting the reddish tints in both his and his son's hair, and he could see the outline of every brick of the walkway meandering nearby, bordered by rows of blooms and bushes as it wound its way toward a copper-colored fountain. But it was the look on Gus' face that continued to mesmerize him; even though the actual event had not taken place in reality, it _could_ have; Justin had captured Gus' innocent, curious and normally exuberant expression perfectly. The sketch was absolutely amazing and probably the most incredibly detailed of any drawing he had ever seen; Justin was young and may be just starting out in his quest to be an artist, but he knew one thing already: this drawing put a lot of others who worked for him to shame in comparison.

 

"It's incredible, isn't it?" He turned to see Lindsay standing in the doorway alone; Mel had stayed behind in the nearby patient lounge to make a quick call to her law firm to check in. She walked into the room and smiled at their son as she took the seat opposite Brian on the other side of Gus' bed. "He has a wonderful feel for candid portraits," she observed as she glanced over at the drawing. "You and Gus practically leap off the page."

 

Brian nodded, finding himself reluctant to tear his eyes away from the drawing. It didn't take a trained eye like Lindsay's to know she was right – this sort of creative talent didn't happen every day. He knew Justin liked to paint, and was, in fact, a student at PIFA, but he had had no idea just how unbelievable his abilities were and how gifted he was. He finally raised his head to peer over at her with what appeared to be a look of sadness on his face.

 

Lindsay eyed Brian carefully, noticing how quiet he had become. There was something else about Brian's expression as he peered down into the drawing – regret? Distress? Worry? She wasn't sure. "Did you read the letter?" she asked, remembering that Justin had left something else for Brian inside the other envelope.

 

Brian frowned. "Letter?"

 

"The one that Justin left for you."

 

Brian nodded as he realized what Lindsay was referring to; in all the other excitement today, he had almost forgotten.

 

As she watched her friend, Lindsay thought she saw the shadow of a smile flicker across Brian's lips as he reached in to retrieve the business-sized, smaller envelope contained inside and saw what was handwritten on the front; there was a facsimile drawing of an employee patch with his pseudo name, _Leroy,_ constructed in a sort of calligraphy script. Placing the drawing down carefully on the nearby portable, rolling table normally used for Gus' meals, he fingered the envelope lightly in his hands a few seconds before he placed one long index finger underneath the flap and ripped it open.

 

Lindsay actually thought she noticed Brian's fingers shaking slightly as he held the folded piece of paper in his hands to read it. She was dying to know what it said but bit her tongue, knowing that Brian would tell her about it if he wanted to. She watched him silently as he unfolded the note and began to read it:

 

_Brian_

_I'm sorry I won't get the chance to talk to you again before Gus is discharged. I'm so relieved he's going to be okay; he's a wonderful little boy. I think what you and Gus have is very special, and I tried to capture that in my sketch. I hope you like it. Take Care._

_Justin (aka Florence)_

 

Brian shook his head in amusement – next to Justin's name he had drawn a little image of a nurse' hat. His expression sobered, though, as he folded the paper gingerly and closed his eyes – a mixture of emotions swirled around him; disgust with the hospital's decision to punish Justin, guilt over his part in what had happened, but also amazement and respect for this man who, despite his problems, had somehow found the time to give him something that was so precious to him. This man was special; and he had to find a way to tell him that.

 

* * *

 

_Hospital - Next Morning - 8:30 a.m._

 

"Sir…..You can't just go in there!"

 

Martin McKenzie glanced up at the sound of his assistant's high-pitched voice as a tall, dark-haired man walked purposely into his office. "Watch me," the man said to her, his darkened eyes flashing. Brian had wanted to march in here last night to give the man a piece of his mind, but the office had been closed. As a result, he had spent a restless night, tossing and turning, until he could return to the hospital to take care of some urgent business.

 

"I'll call Security," Kelly told her boss, turning to rush out of the room. It wasn't totally unusual to get unwelcome, if not agitated visitors from time to time in the Chief of Staff's office, but it still rattled her just the same.

 

Her boss, however, didn't seem too fazed by it as he peered up at the angry-looking man who was towering over him in front of his desk, his arms crossed over his chest. The man was obviously upset about something but didn't seem necessarily violent to him. He took a chance that his previous psychological training was still in effect as he asked calmly, "What can I do for you, Mr…..?"

 

"Kinney…..Brian Kinney," Brian told him curtly as he glared at him.

 

McKenzie nodded, eyeing him from above the rim of his frameless glasses. "I should warn you, Mr. Kinney, you probably have five minutes at best to explain what you want before Security comes and arrests you."

 

"Well, that doesn't surprise me," Brian replied flatly. "That seems to fit your modus operandi."

 

"Excuse me?"

 

"Justin Taylor. Does that ring a bell?"

 

The doctor's eyes widened just a bit as he began to put two and two together. He had a good idea just who this man was now. A chorus of voices just outside his office made him look up as two uniformed security guards rushed in with his assistant close on their heels.

 

One of the men grabbed Brian's forearm. "You'll have to come with me, Sir," he said authoritatively.

 

"No, Wyatt, it's all right," McKenzie told him unexpectedly. "I'll speak to Mr. Kinney."

 

"Are you sure?" the security guard asked in astonishment; he had been told to get up here immediately due to a potentially combative visitor.

 

"Doctor?" Kelly asked, worry in her voice as she echoed the other man's concern.

 

McKenzie nodded as he gazed up at Kinney, making his mind up that he was definitely angry but not dangerous. "I'm sure," he said. "If you'll excuse us - and close the door on the way out."

 

The trio of employees stared at both men for several seconds before McKenzie nodded once more to reiterate what he wanted. Quietly they turned and slowly walked out of the room, his assistant ceding to his wishes as she closed the interoffice door behind her.

 

McKenzie took a sip of his coffee, partly to buy time and partly to calm his nerves a little. Between his pompous chief surgeon waltzing in with his demands for Justin Taylor to be fired, the orderly himself having to be disciplined, and now his apparent co-conspirator in crime barging in unannounced, it had been a hell of a stressful week.

 

"Please….have a seat, Mr. Kinney," he requested quietly.

 

"This isn't a social call, Doctor," Brian said curtly.

 

"I didn't think it was," the other man replied. "But please….sit down and we can discuss your concerns."

 

Brian stared at him for a few seconds longer before he finally dropped into the nearest chair facing the man's desk.

 

McKenzie nodded as he advised, "Now….to answer your question, yes, I'm very aware of who Mr. Taylor is - he's an orderly here. And if I may be so bold, I'm assuming you are the man he was involved with?"

 

Brian pondered that statement - was _involved_ the right word for his and Justin's rather complicated relationship? He supposed at the moment it would have to suffice. "That's correct."

 

The doctor nodded once more. "I guessed as much. So what exactly do you want, Mr. Kinney?"

 

"I want Justin reinstated to his job."

 

The doctor steepled his fingers against his lips thoughtfully as he eyed the elegant-looking man sitting stiffly across from him. "I'm sorry, Mr. Kinney, I can't discuss this with you - personnel matters are confidential."

 

Brian huffed in irritation. "But I'm personally involved here! It's not like I don't know the circumstances."

 

"Obviously, you're aware of what transpired regarding Mr. Taylor's disciplinary meeting," the doctor acknowledged. "What he chooses to tell others is his own concern. But because of hospital policy, I still can't discuss it with you."

 

Brian's face reddened in both frustration and anger. "Okay….then you you'll listen to what I have to say anyway. This is bullshit, Doctor - flat-out, homophobic bullshit! You're punishing someone who is _needed_ here at this hospital. I don't know how much you know about me, but my own son was hospitalized here with a very serious illness. I watched how Justin treated him first hand; he was compassionate and caring and made my son's stay here a lot more pleasant that it could have been. He cares about these children, Doctor; to him it isn't just a job, it's a passion. How many employees can you say perform their jobs the same way?"

 

The doctor bristled at the insinuation. "We pride ourselves here on our compassion for our patients, Mr. Kinney; I assure you, Justin is not alone in that regard."

 

Brian glared at him, his eyes almost black with aggravation. "Maybe," he conceded grudgingly. "But I still say none of them have Justin's gentleness and kindness, or his willingness to do more than what is required of him. Do you realize the hardship he will have by not being paid for a week? He's trying to work his way through art school; do you have any comprehension how expensive art supplies are, let alone rent and utilities? Do you? Well, _I_ do, because I own an advertising agency and I _employ_ artists. It's outrageously expensive! "

 

"I imagine it is," McKenzie replied truthfully. "And I sympathize. But again, Mr. Kinney, what the hospital does regarding personnel disciplinary matters is not open for public discussion." He sighed softly as he took another sip of his quickly-cooling coffee. "I'm afraid I can't help you, Sir, and I have a very full schedule today, so you'll have to excuse me now."

 

Brian knew a dismissal when he heard one; inside, though, he was seething. Obviously he wasn't going to accomplish anything by speaking to this man. He shook his head in disgust as he stood up. "I'm grateful for the care you provided my son here," he admitted a little gruffly. "But I have no idea why someone like Justin would want to work at a place that is so homophobic and hate-filled."

 

"Whether you believe it or not, Mr. Kinney, Mr. Taylor's sexual orientation had nothing to do with my decision," McKenzie told him defensively. "But that's all I can say about it." He felt that was probably crossing the line, anyway, between keeping personnel matters confidential and speaking publicly about it, but he couldn't help it. He was not a bigoted person, but there was still a degree of decorum that had to be met, gay or straight, and whether he meant to or not, Justin had crossed the line. "Now, please...if you'll excuse me…..."

 

"Of course," Brian said sarcastically. "Don't let me stop you from carrying out your next heavy-handed personnel matter," he added as he turned to go. As he reached the door and grasped the handle to open it, he couldn't help making one last comment. "I hope my son never needs hospitalization again, Doctor, because he won't be coming back here if he does. I'll find somewhere else to take him."

 

As Brian left, McKenzie let out a heavy, ragged breath of frustration. Yes, he really hated weeks like this, he decided, as he tried to turn his attention back to his work, but he couldn't get Kinney's words out of his mind. It would be several minutes as a result before he could truly concentrate on his tasks again.

 

* * *

 

_Two Days Later – Mid-Morning_

 

As Lindsay gazed at her son, she had to smile – Gus was back to his old self, and in fact was quite excited over the fact that as part of his discharge procedure, he was going to get to ride out to the entrance in a wheelchair. As he clutched his toy kitten that Justin had given him, he bounced up and down excitedly on his bed as if he were about to compete in an Indy 500 race.

 

"Honey, don't bounce too hard on the bed – you might fall off," she gently warned him. "Hold onto the railing at least." Gus reached over with his free, little chubby hand to grasp the cold metal, hardly able to contain his anticipation over his upcoming ride. The little boy would still have to take some oral antibiotics for a few days, but he had made a remarkable recovery; he was now chattering away just like he usually did, to Lindsay's great relief. In fact, he was doing so well that she had persuaded her partner to return to work, telling Mel that she would pick up Gus later after his visit with Brian; his father had requested to spend a little time with him upon his release today. Mel had been a little perturbed for some reason at the thought that Brian would get the first opportunity to be with Gus upon his discharge from the hospital, but after all, he _had_ saved their son's life. Lindsay figured that he deserved a little private time with his son, and when he had talked to her last night on the phone, he didn't quite come out and say it, but there was something in his tone of voice that indicated to her that he needed to be with him….

 

"How much longer, Mommy?" Gus asked, bringing his mother out of her reverie. "And where's Daddy?"

 

"Just a little longer, Baby. And your dad should be here any minute. Remember, we have to wait until someone brings your wheelchair before you can leave anyway."

 

"Orly?" he asked eagerly, his eyes wide with hope.

 

Lindsay smiled. "I don't think so, Gus," she told the little boy, watching his face fall in disappointment. "I'm not sure he's been working the past couple of days." Gus had become quite fond of Justin during his hospitalization; she wasn't surprised, though; the young blond man had spoiled their son rotten, from his frequent trips to his room to drop off ice cream, to bringing him the kitten and his 'combat' apparel, and the numerous times he had spent with him either drawing dragons or tractors – two of Gus' favorite toys. He had even painted whimsical creatures on his rosy cheeks when he wasn't feeling very well in an attempt to lift his spirits, which it invariably did. After he had started feeling better, especially, Gus had looked forward eagerly to all of Justin's visits. The past few days, however, he must have been working a different shift, though, because she hadn't seen him at all, and her son had been distinctly disappointed not to have had the chance to see him again.

 

She glanced over at the doorway just then as she noticed a shadow appear out of the corner of her eye. "There's Daddy, Gus," she said with a smile as Brian nodded at her from the doorway. She frowned a little in concern as she noticed a sort of troubled look in his eyes before she watched him deliberately paste a smile back on his face to greet his son.

 

"Hey, Sonny Boy!" he cried out as he walked in and scooped his son up into his arms. "I hear you're breaking out of here today," he said as Gus nodded and smiled, placing his arms around his father's neck as Brian gave him a brief, firm hug before releasing him to sit back down on the bed; he took his own place in a nearby chair positioned close to the bed.

 

"I get to go for a ride," he told his father eagerly, who looked over puzzled at Lindsay.

 

"Wheelchair ride," she explained as Brian nodded. "Dr. Broderick's already signed off on his discharge; we're just waiting for an orderly to bring in his wheelchair." She looked directly into her friend's eyes as she added softly, "He was hoping it would be Justin."

 

She noticed what appeared to almost be a look of pain cross her friend's eyes as he said almost sadly, "He's not working this week."

 

"Oh?" she said, frowning, trying to find out more. She could tell there was definitely something bothering Brian, but she _also_ knew he was trying not to show it in front of their son. Did his look of distress have something to do with Justin?

 

"No," he simply said, shaking his head. Whatever was bothering him, Brian apparently wasn't in the mood at the moment to elaborate. She made a mental note to try and find out what was going on just as a young, dark-haired man wearing the familiar outfit of one of the hospital's orderlies walked in rolling a child's wheelchair in front of him and her attention was diverted to the present.

 

As they walked behind their son while he was wheeled down to the front entrance a few moments later, Lindsay glanced over at her friend sympathetically; Brian caught her gaze and merely shook his head as if to say _not now_. She frowned in concern, knowing something was definitely bothering him but knowing him well enough to realize he would tell her only when it was ready to, as they entered the floor's elevator to begin their departure.

 

* * *

 

_Same Day, Late Afternoon – South Side Mall_

 

Justin dodged yet another kiosk salesman trying to sell him some sort of hand cream – or was it a new type of cell phone? Honestly, he wasn't paying any attention to _what_ they were selling – he had been walking aimlessly up and down the corridors of the mall for a few hours now, mainly just trying to kill time. He hated not being able to work with the children at the hospital; without their smiles and their hugs of gratitude, he felt empty and lost. He had tried to stay home and sketch, deciding if he couldn't work at least he could try to begin some new art piece, but worries over how his patients were and how he was simply going to survive at least temporarily without any money coming in plagued his thoughts so severely he decided he had to get out and try to keep his mind off his troubles.

 

He had considered calling his mother to ask her for help, but he ultimately decided against it, feeling it made him look like some incompetent, scared little teenager unable to fend for himself. It was also part of the reason why he hadn't accepted Daphne's generous offer to help, even though in her position as a medical resident, he also knew her expenses had to be outrageous. No, he was just going to have to try and figure out a way to take care of his difficulties himself. The only problem was, though, he had no specific idea how he would do that.

 

He had stopped in a couple of clothing and CD stores at the mall while he was here and had filled out job applications, but they did not actually have any openings and he wondered how in the world he would manage to work there while he was trying to attend school anyway; unless they were extremely flexible, like the hospital was, he wouldn't be able to commit to a set schedule. And he didn't exactly have a lot of assets he could sell off for some extra cash. _Maybe I could do some 'tricks,'_ he thought scornfully, not really thinking about it seriously but wondering just the same how he would cope without a week's salary.

 

He supposed it was his own fault – he should have done what his mother said and saved up a small cushion for just such emergencies as this, although he never in his wildest dreams thought he would need extra money for _this_ reason. Of course, he had never counted on meeting such a dominating force as Brian Kinney, either.

 

He sighed as he finally sat down on one of the mall's benches near the main entrance and placed his head in his hands wearily, resting his elbows on his knees. How did he ever get in this mess? Who would have ever thought just kissing someone could have created such major consequences in his life? Did he regret kissing Brian? Was he sorry he had ever met him in the first place? If he hadn't, he would have never found himself in this awful predicament and he could have just gone on with his life at the hospital, taking care of the children who meant so much to him and having frequent lunches with Daphne to talk about what was going on in their lives as they mutually bitched about how little time they had to get what they needed done. He could have just continued with his classes in hopes of eventually becoming a full-fledged, card-carrying, self-sufficient artist. He supposed he could _still_ do that, even now, although it was going to be hard to even buy art supplies in the next few weeks.

 

Yes, Brian had certainly disrupted his normal life and turned it upside down in a lot of ways. So was he sorry he had ever gotten involved with him, if that was even the word for it? Was he? He let out another heavy sigh in realization, his eyes closed and his shoulders drooped as he remained on the bench, oblivious to the shoppers walking by with their bags swinging by their sides. _No_ …..no, damn it, he wasn't sorry; the man had made him feel things no one else had ever made him feel. He had made his body come alive with desire and his heart thump with excitement and anticipation every time he was near him. It didn't really matter if they were actually touching or not; just being in the same vicinity as him set off internal fireworks that continued even now to astound him in their intensity.

 

So was it just lust he was feeling? Was it just some incredible physical attraction to this god of a man who was built like a Greek mythological statue, all toned and tanned from head to toe? Whose melodic, almost hypnotic voice set him aflame every time he spoke his name? Who caused his skin to flush and his temperature to soar whenever he touched him, kissed him? Was that all there was to it?

 

No…..he wouldn't believe that, he _couldn't_ believe that. Brian was not only gorgeous and practically dripped sex appeal, but he was also intelligent, street-savvy and had a wicked, almost bawdy sense of humor that he found fascinating. What he admired the most about Brian, though, was the deep, obvious love he demonstrated for his son. The gentle, caring way he had touched Gus and had spoken to him while he was so seriously ill, and the almost non-ceasing devotion he showed to him as he stayed nonstop by his side, especially in those awful first days at the hospital, had made his own heart melt in response. Perhaps it was because he knew if he had been Gus' father, he would have reacted in precisely the same way; there was just something special about that little boy. Brian, for all his attempts at portraying himself as a non-caring, hedonistic son of a bitch, was anything but, and Justin knew that.

 

Even if he _did_ actually care for Brian, though, why did it matter? He reminded himself that in all likelihood Gus had been discharged from the hospital this morning, so Brian would have no more reason to even be there anymore. He would go back to his whirlwind, highfaluting life and forget all about him. He would chalk up their experience with each other to a brief, pleasant interlude, perhaps regretting that they couldn't have progressed to something more, but finding a satisfactory substitute somewhere else, and in short order no doubt. Brian would have no trouble going on with his life…..but what about him?

 

_Snap out of it, Justin_ , he told himself. _He'll forget about you, if he hasn't already; you need to do the same._ As he continued to sit there, though, he wondered just how easy that would be…

 

* * *

 

_Same Time….._

 

Brian had to smile at his son, the chatterbox. What a difference a week made! He couldn't believe it had just been last Saturday when he had rushed his son to the hospital, not realizing at the time exactly how seriously ill he was. And if things had been different, the whole event could have ended quite tragically. He let out a breath of relief, though, as he looked at his vibrant, lively son walking next to him and chirping away as he relished in the warmth of the little hand grasping his.

 

He grabbed the handle to the mall's entrance and swung it open for him and his son to enter. Gus never missed a beat of his mainly one-way conversation, though, as they continued to walk down one of the access hallways toward the larger, open area of the building.

 

"Can I ride the horses, Daddy? I like the ones that go up and down the best. And can we visit the toy store, too? And I want a hot dog for lunch – they didn't have those at the hosp'l."

 

Brian grinned; Gus loved the indoor carrousel they had inside the mall's food atrium area; of course, he normally made sure his son ate _after_ riding the amusement for obvious reasons. He had asked Dr. Broderick before they left the hospital what his son's limitations were, and except for making sure he drank plenty of fluids and took his medication, he could pretty much do any sort of activity right off the bat as long as it wasn't too strenuous. He supposed that passively sitting on a merry-go-round horse as it moved up and down would qualify. "I think we can arrange all that, Sonny Boy," he told his son with a smile as the boy's eyes lit up in response. "Why don't we go to the toy store first?"

 

"Yay!" Gus cried out, jumping up and down in anticipation as he began to pull his father a little more urgently toward their destination. He stopped after a few feet, though, as he stared over at someone familiar.

 

"Orly!" he cried out , his eyes lit up with excitement.

 

Brian raised his eyebrows curiously. "Orly?"

 

"From the hosp'l, Daddy! It's Orly!" He began to pull his father even harder now toward a group of benches encircling a large, potted tree situated underneath a series of the mall's skylight panels built to let in extra light.

 

Brian smiled and nodded as he realized who his son was talking about. He had remembered Lindsay mentioning some employee by that odd name at the hospital that Gus had taken a special liking to. He had never met the person, but he was apparently about to now. "I'm coming, Sonny Boy," he said good-naturedly with a smile as he allowed his son to continue pulling him toward the main area of the mall.

 

As they got a little closer, though, his heart sped up in recognition and his breath caught in his throat as Gus excitedly shouted out the person's name again and a slender-looking blond raised his head to glance over at the familiar sound of his son's voice. He couldn't believe his good fortune as he gazed into the shocked blue eyes of his favorite orderly. It seemed that his most fervent wish for the past few days had just come miraculously true…..

 

He was almost afraid he was imagining this lucky coincidence, but as they came closer he watched Justin's eyes widen in recognition and lick his lips nervously before a smile appeared on his face as Gus broke apart from his father's grasp and came running up to him.

 

Justin opened his arms to sweep Gus into a hug as he exclaimed in delight against his soft brown hair, "Hey, Buddy! How _are_ you? You look so good! How are you feeling?" Justin couldn't help staring up at the little boy's handsome father as he spoke; Brian was dressed casually in a pair of designer, form-fitting jeans and a black, long-sleeved, button-down shirt with the sleeves partially rolled up, and the intense look he was _also_ wearing made his heart do flip-flops. If it was possible, he thought Brian looked even more handsome than before. He hadn't realized just how much he had looked forward to his occasional bouts of running into Brian until he couldn't see him anymore; as he drunk in the sight of him now, though, he realized with startling clarity that he had missed seeing him terribly.

 

He forced himself to tear his gaze away from Brian to stare into Gus's doe-eyed face as the little boy said excitedly, "I feel good, Orly," he said smiling. "Daddy's going to take me to the toy store and I'm going to ride a horse!"

 

Justin smiled as he gently grasped Gus' upper arms. "You are? A horse? Really - where?"

 

"At the carrousel," Brian explained, gazing down into Justin's eyes as they locked gazes; he suddenly realized something as he added, frowning, "He called you _Orly_."

 

Justin shook his head in puzzlement until a light bulb went on inside his head and he smiled. "I think he means _Orderly_ ; he probably heard me called that so many times he thinks it's my name now."

 

Brian actually chuckled at that statement, realizing Justin must be right. He patted his son's head as he explained, "His name is _Justin_ , Sonny Boy," he told Gus tenderly. "Orderly is the name of his job."

 

Justin grinned as Gus' face scrunched up in thought. "Jus'n?" he said, peering into the eyes in uncertainty.

 

Justin nodded. "Yeah….Justin." His eyes filled with the beginning of tears as he said to the little boy sincerely, "I'm so glad you're okay, Buddy. So very glad."

 

Brian watched the tender interaction between his son and Justin in amazement; Gus was normally a little reserved with people he didn't know very well, even downright shy at times. He certainly didn't appear that way with Justin, though; he had been shocked when his son had dashed up to Justin and actually hugged him without hesitation. And Gus seemed quite comfortable with Justin as he allowed the blond to place him on his lap as they spoke while he wrapped his hands around the blond's neck for support.

 

He was about to sit down next to Justin himself in hopes of speaking to him - they had so much to talk about – but his impatient son unfortunately had other ideas. "Daddy! Can we go to the toy store now?" Gus asked, reaching up to tug on his father's sleeve to get his attention.

 

"We'll go in just a minute, Sonny Boy," Brian told his son gently as he squeezed his son's hand; he watched in dismay as Justin seemed to fidget uncomfortably like if he was looking for a way to leave. He had so much he needed to say to Justin, so much yet to discover about him. He had to thank him for the wonderful present he had left him, and he find a way to let Justin know that he wanted to get to know him better. Most importantly of all, he needed to tell him how fucking sorry he was for his troubles at the hospital, and for his role in it. He was not going to let this opportunity to talk to him pass them by – there was too much at stake now.

 

Just as he feared, though, Justin gently removed Gus from his lap and stood up, looking resigned to saying goodbye once more to father and son. "It was so nice seeing you again, Gus," he said softly, directing his words at the little boy but not able to keep from staring into Brian's eyes as brushed his somewhat sweaty hands against the fabric of his jeans. "I…..I better be going," he added, turning to leave. He had only gone a couple of steps, though, before he felt Brian grab onto his forearm and ask oddly, "Have you eaten yet, Justin?" He could feel his pulse beating erratically as he turned to stare into Brian's face; Gus had rose from the bench and was hugging his father's leg in a silent plea to get going, but Brian had to do something first to prevent Justin from leaving.

 

"Huh?" Justin asked somewhat dumbly, having a hard time focusing on what Brian was actually saying.

 

Brian couldn't help smirking a little at the somewhat unintelligible reply. "I said – have you had any lunch yet?"

 

Justin could feel the warmth of Brian's hand as it continued to grip his arm and he couldn't help flushing in response as Brian's eyes practically bored into him. He shook his head mutely, almost afraid to speak for fear it would give his feelings away. God, this man was so beautiful…..He looked down at the floor, anywhere except those golden-hazel eyes that he knew were staring at him intently.

 

"Gus and I are going to the food court to eat a hot dog," he said, having to bite his tongue at the thought of ingesting some inedible part of a pig; he knew what went into hot dogs and it was NOT pretty, or even food in his estimation. But if it meant Justin would join them, he knew he would eat cardboard if he had to. "Come with us," he asked softly.

 

Gus continued to hold onto his father's arm with his right hand as he reached upward toward Justin with his left. "Yeah, Jus'n…..Come and eat with me and Daddy," Gus echoed to Brian's joy, thrilled that he had a secret weapon at his disposal. If anyone could talk Justin into eating with them, he knew it would be his son.

 

"You're not going to turn my son down, are you?" Brian implored softly, curling his lips under as he waited with bated breath for the blond's response.

 

He let it out as Justin sighed, knowing when he was outnumbered and replied simply, "Okay." Gus thankfully took care of any initial awkwardness by taking hold of both men's hands then and began to pull them both toward the center of the mall where the food court was located.

 

The two men continued to stare intently at each other as they walked, not speaking a word with their lips but saying volumes with their eyes. Gus was oblivious to the drama playing out beside him, simply happy to be out of the hospital and visiting one of his favorite places in the whole world with two of his favorite men in the world. He continued to chatter aimlessly about anything and everything, Brian occasionally issuing a grunt or 'uh, huh' in acknowledgment as he continued to stare over at his companion. Gus would ask Justin a question from time to time, also, evoking a similar response in him as a few minutes later they reached the circular part of the mall ringed by a series of various fast food restaurants and stopped near the entrance to them.

 

Justin looked around for a seat, spotting a clean table nearby. He began to head toward it with the intention of saving a spot for the three of them when Brian said to him, "No….Gus likes booths better. How about that one?" He pointed over to a curved, red-vinyl cushioned booth near a somewhat private corner of the food tables, set between two large potted trees and banked in the back by a curved flower planter holding several live, green plants. Of course, Brian knew Gus didn't give a flying fuck _where_ they sat as long as he got his hot dog, but HE did. Booths were so much more personal, while chairs at a table were so…..separate.

 

To his relief – and delight – Justin nodded and shuffled slowly over toward the booth he had indicated, taking a place near the end of it. Brian took Gus' hand and led him over to the _Hot Dog Emporium_ to purchase one Happy Dog meal (he had to bite his tongue at the cutesy moniker) two all-beef hot dogs and two Cokes; he kept eyeing Justin the entire he was waiting, almost afraid he would get up and walk away before he had a chance to speak with him, until at last the uniformed girl behind the counter handed him his food and drinks and he and his son walked over to join Justin at the booth.

 

Brian made sure that he slid in first, and despite the fairly wide curvature of the booth, he managed to slide his body around the laminate table so that he was almost touching Justin's hip with his. As Gus continued to chatter away excitedly over his first venture out into the real world after being hospitalized, Brian waited anxiously for a chance to talk to Justin about what was really on his mind.

 

Unfortunately, though, his excitable and inquisitive son wasn't going to give him much of a chance to do that; he was much too hyper over being set free from his medical imprisonment. He asked Brian everything from how many times he could ride the horses, to how many tractors and dinosaurs he could buy at the toy store, and whether he could buy cotton candy at the popcorn booth later, keeping up an incessant chatter in between occasional bites of his meal.

 

As always, Brian was thrilled to spend time with his son – especially in light of what had happened to him recently – but he was desperately wanting to talk to Justin alone. Unfortunately, Gus was not at the age where he could be left alone to fend for himself. He had to find a way to talk to him, though….

 

Justin eyed Brian carefully as once more they locked gazes; they hadn't really spoken much since they had bumped into each, other than to answer Gus' numerous questions on their way here to the food court. And now, as they sat almost hip to hip, he could almost feel Brian's warmth oozing through the denim of his jeans. He knew Brian could, too, and he could tell Brian wanted to talk to him just as much as he did. But how?

 

"Gus!" Brian gently admonished his son suddenly as he wiped a smudge of ketchup on his jeans; the mischievous action by the little boy, along with Brian's somewhat exasperated expression, made Justin smile only for the second time today and it made Brian's heart stop. "Not on your pants, Sonny Boy – that's what napkins are for!" He reached over to grab an extra white paper napkin from the table and handed it to his son, who dabbed at the stain on his thigh, not quite succeeding in removing it but at least making it less noticeable.

 

Brian sighed; this was not going at all the way he had hoped. He wouldn't even be able to talk to Justin near the carrousel, he knew, because he would have to hold onto Gus as he rode on the moving horse to prevent him from falling off. Another need for hospitalization was the _last_ thing he needed right now, although if he didn't find a way to talk to Justin privately, it might be the only way he would…

 

"Are you done eating, Gus?" he asked as the little boy dropped the last French fry into his kid's meal box and rubbed his hands together briskly.

 

The little boy nodded. "Yeah, Daddy….can we go for a ride now?"

 

Brian nodded as he pulled his little boy's chair back from the table. "Okay...but wait for me!" he cried out as his son took off at a run toward the nearby amusement ride. Brian took a second to peer down at Justin, who had remained mostly silent during their meal. The brunet scooted out from under the table and stood next to him. "You're not going to leave me alone with a rambunctious five-year-old, are you?"

 

"Brian….."

 

The older man turned to check up on his son, who was now standing next to the ticket taker, looking back at him expectantly. He turned quickly to stare down at the blond. "Justin…..please…..I really need to talk to you, but I can't right now with Gus here with me." A sudden thought entered his mind as he asked unexpectedly, "Have dinner with me tonight."

 

Justin's eyes widened at Brian's invitation. "Dinner? We just ate."

 

Brian smirked. "Yes, I was there, too, remember?" he quipped as Justin smiled just a little at his attempt at humor. "I mean a little later – that'll give me some more time to spend with Sonny Boy over there before Lindsay comes to pick him up at my loft."

 

Justin's expression sobered somewhat at the thought of having dinner with this handsome, sophisticated man; he _thought_ Brian seemed genuinely interested in him – he was certainly giving him some intense looks earlier over lunch – but just what was his goal? To get him into bed and then dump him like some trick du jour? Or did he really care about him? He almost had to laugh derisively – at least he would get two decent meals today – he might need to stock up for the period next week when he might not be able to _afford_ to eat anything. Truthfully, though, he really needed to talk to Brian , too – to clear the air about a lot of things – and perhaps it was best done outside the hospital.

 

"Justin?" Brian asked softly, needing to return to his impatient son's side but holding his breath while he waited for Justin's response. "Dinner?" Uncaring as to who might be watching, he reached over to grab Justin's wrist, setting off almost a tingling, burning sensation at the warm touch of his skin underneath; it instantly made him remember with startling clarity what it had felt like to be kissing him, and he realized he had to have more, to learn more…. "I really need to talk to you," he repeated as he gazed into Justin's blue eyes, willing him to understand.

 

Justin licked his lips in indecision, a small part of his tongue coming out to wet them; he flushed as he noticed Brian's eyes darkening in response to his action. "I….I need to talk to you, too," he admitted softly. "Okay, then. Where and what time do you want to meet?"

 

"How about 7:30 – at my loft; I can order something in. What would you like?"

 

_You….._ Justin couldn't help the thought that came unbidden to his mind, even after everything that had happened at the hospital, he still cared about this man; aloud, though, he repeated instead, "Your loft?"

 

Brian nodded; he really wanted Justin alone – and not just to pick up where they had left off. He wanted to spend some time with him to talk, to explain what had happened, and to simply get to know him better. He wanted to tell him what a phenomenal artist he thought he was, and what his gift had meant to him. "Yeah…that way we won't be disturbed. But if you'd prefer," he added hastily, wanting somehow for Justin to recognize his sincerity, "we could meet somewhere else." _But please don't say that,_ he couldn't help pleading silently; although he knew he would meet anywhere with him if he could just have a chance to get to know this unique, passionate man better and to explain, he couldn't think of a more private place than in his own sanctuary at home.

 

Justin could hear Gus calling excitedly for his father by the merry-go-round, anxious to board. He knew he only had a moment or two to make up his mind. Biting his lip for a few seconds, he finally made the only choice he knew he could make. "No….your loft's okay," he whispered almost shyly, his heart picking up in rhythm just at the thought of being alone with this man. "I like pretty much anything," he added.

 

Brian nodded as he reached in his pants pocket to pull out a business card; reaching over to grab a pen on the table resting in a survey brochure holder, he hurriedly scribbled down his address on the back. "You have a way over there?" he asked as he handed over the card to Justin.

 

The blond glanced at the information as he nodded. "Yeah…I can get there." It might be the bus, he thought, but he would get there some way; he couldn't wait to find out what Brian wanted to say to him.

 

Brian reached in to retrieve another business card and flipped it over. "I'd like to get your cell phone number, too, in case I need to reach you." Now that he had run into Justin, he wanted to make sure he didn't disappear on him again.

 

Justin nodded, softly rattling off the requested information as Brian jotted it down.

 

Brian nodded in relief, glad to finally have a way to keep in touch with him. He smiled thankfully over the blond's agreement to meet with him. "Good," he said as he gently dropped Justin's wrist and turned to walk toward his son. "I'll be looking forward to it," he added softly; he took a few steps, only to turn back around to find Justin still staring silently at him. Justin nodded as a sort of goodbye as Brian finally turned back around to hurry and catch up with his son, hope at last forming in his mind and in his heart.

 


	13. The Heart is a Fragile Instrument

_Justin’s Apartment – Three Hours Later_

 

Justin stood in front of the bathroom mirror, clad only in a thin, dark-brown towel, one of a set his mother had given him a few months ago as part of his ‘going off to college’ package when he had decided to find an inexpensive apartment to rent while going to school and working at the hospital; he had gratefully accepted her offer to help him stock his new living quarters with some of her surplus household items.

 

 

He picked up the matching hand towel lying on top of the vanity’s surface and vigorously rubbed it through his hair to help dry it; he had spent way too much time in the shower, scrubbing every inch of his body in preparation for his – what should he call it? _date_? – with some off-brand, fruity-type soap he had picked up at the grocery store a while back; he tried his best to economize wherever and whenever he could to save on expenses.  Even with his job at the hospital, tuition, rent, groceries, utilities, insurance and many other incidentals didn’t allow for a lot of extravagances.   

 

 

Placing the towel down on top of the toilet in his small bathroom, he looked at himself in the vanity mirror and sighed; what had possessed him to agree to have dinner with Brian in the first place?  While he felt he was just as good as the next person, he still felt definitely out of his league here; compared to Brian he was like a Big Mac next to a filet mignon….He barely scratched by month to month on what he made, always praying that he wouldn’t get sick or hurt a leg or something, or have something break or incur some unexpected expenses at school; anything even so much as ten bucks over his budget could seriously put his finances in jeopardy.  Now he had agreed to have dinner with a man who probably dropped ten-dollar tips to doormen and valets at the drop of a hat.  What had he been _thinking_?

 

And just what in the hell was he going to _wear_?  Somehow he didn’t think a worn, slightly paint-spattered, long-sleeved t-shirt and a pair of battered jeans was going to cut it, but he certainly couldn’t afford to run out and buy some new clothes.  And he wasn’t about to wear any part of his hospital’s orderly uniform – he had seen more than enough of that lately, and right now the last thing he needed was a reminder of what had just transpired in McKenzie’s office.  Besides, it just brought to mind how much he missed working with the children there.  Yes, it was going to be an extremely long and arduous week, and this was just the beginning…..

 

 

_Well, this isn’t getting me anywhere_ , he thought with disgust as he dropped the towel from his slender hips to drape it over the edge of the white porcelain tub.  There had to be _something_ he could do.  He felt nervous enough agreeing to meet the man who practically screamed out “warning – dangerous moves ahead,” without waltzing in there looking like a scared little man-child; wearing his typical jeans and t-shirt somehow didn’t instill a lot of confidence in him that he could hold his own against such a formidable man as Brian Kinney.

 

A sudden flash of inspiration hit him as he hurriedly donned his pair of briefs and walked over to open the door, feeling the rush of cool air on his skin as he left the confined heat of his shower behind.  The thought that he was escaping one sort of ‘steaminess’ to possibly run into another later crossed his mind just before he walked over to his small living room and retrieved his cell phone from the coffee table.

 

Flipping it open, he dialed a number from memory and waited for the person on the other end to answer.   _Please be at home….._   He sighed in relief when his wish was fulfilled.  “Hey, it’s Justin……I need to ask you a favor.” 

 

 

_Same Time – Loft_

 

Brian stood in front of the large, rectangular bathroom mirror, splashing some outrageously expensive aftershave on his face and around his neck.  He had spent an obscenely-long time in the shower, using the matching scented soap to lather his entire body from head to toe, secretly hoping that it would become a key component in his successful _Fuck the Hot Orderly Night._  

 

Normally he didn’t spend quite so much time and care on his grooming ritual if his main goal was to score with a new trick for the night; after all, how do you improve upon Kinney perfection?  Now that Gus was almost back to normal, he was finding himself back on top of his game and his goal tonight was to get a certain beautiful blond in his bed before the night was over.

 

As he glanced into the mirror, however, and his eyes fell upon the reflection of Justin’s drawing of him and Gus staring back at him from its honored position on the bedroom’s dresser, he realized that assertion wasn’t totally true.  Yes, he was quite anxious to find out if the rest of Justin was as delicious as those plump, cranberry-colored lips that he had had the privilege and pleasure of kissing a couple of times so far.  And yes, he had no doubt that by the time this evening was through, Justin would have a full tummy of food and he would have a full Justin in his mouth and his oh-so-fuckable ass surrounding his cock.  Brian had never been turned down yet for a chance to experience the wonders of sex that only he could provide, and he knew this wouldn’t be an exception. 

 

But was that _all_ he wanted from Justin?  Just the chance to verify that the blond was as voracious and passionate in bed as he was with his art or taking care of the children at the hospital?  He sighed; no, it wasn’t, and he would be lying to himself if he tried to portray it as such.  He was definitely attracted to Justin – _wildly_ attractive to him; but he was also intrigued by what made this feisty, caring man tick.  And he still had a lot to talk to him about; he felt at least partly to blame (okay, maybe a little _more_ than partly) for Justin being suspended.  Thanks to Justin’s loyal little pit bull friend, too – Dr. Chanders – he now knew that Justin didn’t exactly live a worry-free lifestyle.  Those facts, along with the realization that the politically-correct Chief of Staff wasn’t willing to do anything to change his decision, made him feel quite guilty about the whole fiasco.

 

Justin had been nothing but compassionate and gentle with his son; not to mention, he had gone out of his way to provide him with some much-needed and welcomed creature comforts while he had stayed by his son’s bedside.  And the drawing; as soon as he had had the chance, he had picked out a silver frame to place the drawing in, not wanting anything to damage it until he had an opportunity to place it in a location where he could admire it frequently.  It really was the best candid portrayal of him and Gus he had ever seen; it was better than any photograph because it was truly one of a kind.  He knew how much Justin seemed to love working with the sick children at the hospital, but a man with talent such as his could never be expected to remain as a lowly orderly, no matter _how_ vital he might be to the hospital.

 

“Apparently he wasn’t vital enough, though,” Brian muttered to himself.  If he _had_ been, McKenzie never would have succumbed to the other doctor’s mandate to discipline him and he would have listened to reason.  Just when he thought maybe gay rights might just be taking a small step forward, something like this came crashing through to slam him back to reality…..

 

He scowled at the thought as he dropped his deep-red, Egyptian cotton towel to hang it over the nearby warming rack and walked out of the large, marbled room back into the bedroom.  Sauntering over to his closet, he began to push the clothing apart to figure out what to wear.  Of course, anything he wore made him look hot, but tonight…….it had to be _blazing_ hot. 

 

Several minutes and various shirts tried and discarded later, he finally found the one:  it was a dark, red, almost maroon, long-sleeved satin shirt that shimmered in the soft lighting from the night table’s lamp; as it reflected the light, it picked up hues of dark gray within the fabric as Brian’s muscles moved while he turned to admire how it firmly hugged the sculpted lines of his arms and chest.  He had opted for a button-down shirt style so he could leave the top couple of buttons undone to show just a peek of tantalizing bronzed skin for his dinner guest’s benefit; he hoped it would help light Justin’s desire to promptly strip it off his body and get down to some real business in short order.  He had finished off his shirt with a coal-black pair of Armani jeans and as his usual custom, had opted not to wear any shoes; no point in delaying the inevitable _too_ long…..

 

The last issue he had to deal with was the food; Justin had said he would eat anything.  It was hard to believe the man ate anything at all, though; not so much because of how he apparently had to live so frugally, but because he was just so damn petite.  He normally didn’t worry about what to feed a guest; hell, he never had a man over to feed him anything except his cock – he didn’t _DO_ dates.  And he _certainly_ didn’t do flowers and candles, so if Justin was expecting that he was going to be sorely disappointed.  He supposed, though, that he should have something other than Beam lying around, though; he wasn’t even sure if the blond even drank alcohol or not…..

 

He started at the thought as he realized how much care and worry he was putting into this one evening’s date; shit, was that what in fact this _was_?  Did something change from a simple expression of thanks over what Justin had done for him and his son to a fucking _date_?  He shuddered, wondering what in the hell had gotten into him.  He was making way too much out of this, he kept telling himself; it was just dinner, a thank-you dinner, albeit with a hot little dynamo of an orderly…….Wasn’t it? 

 

As he buttoned the fly of his jeans while he stood next to his now clothing-festooned bed, he sighed in defeat.  Who was he kidding?  A simple thank-you gesture didn’t make his cock harden just at the thought of having dinner with another man.  A simple thank-you gesture didn’t make his pulse quicken and rub his hands restlessly over his legs in nervous anticipation.  A simple thank-you gesture didn’t involve pondering the perfect food to order or the right outfit to wear.  No, he wasn’t sure exactly what he was feeling about Justin, but it wasn’t just mere gratitude; there was a lot more going on than that.  He just wasn’t quite sure what it was yet, nor did he have time at the moment to philosophize about it….

 

Hurriedly placing the discarded clothing back on hangers and placing them neatly into his closet, he rushed out of the bedroom to begin getting the rest of the loft ready for his guest.  Glancing over at the clock, he was startled to see it was 6:00 already – 90 minutes until Justin was due to arrive. 

 

“Damn it!” he muttered as he rushed over to his desk to pick up his cell phone.  Flipping through several entries in his electronic phonebook, he finally located the number he needed – his favorite Italian restaurant.  Dialing the number and impatiently waiting until the establishment picked up, he quickly ordered two gourmet dinners, some appetizers, and an expensive burgundy to be delivered fifteen minutes before Justin was due to arrive, adding some cherry-cover cheesecake as an almost afterthought before he hung up. 

 

_Same Time – Near Justin’s Apartment_

 

“Turn around,” was the stern command as Justin blushed; it was one thing to peruse himself critically in his own bathroom mirror at home.  It was quite different to know someone _else_ was studying him for the same reason.

 

His classmate, Jared Campbell, nodded in approval as he noticed how his pair of Levi’s jeans filled out Justin’s ass perfectly; in fact, the damn faded-blue denim looked better on him than on his _own_ body.  Of course, he didn’t have Justin’s drop-dead, perfectly rounded bubble butt, either.  “Looks good from this angle,” he reported as Justin blushed an even deeper shade of pink.  “Turn around again; let me check out your package.”

 

“Jared!” he scolded him as his friend chuckled at his embarrassment.  “Do you mind?  I’m nervous enough as it is….”  He had called his friend a while ago, explaining he needed to borrow some of his clothing for an ‘important dinner’ he had this evening.  Of course, his fellow classmate, who painted next to him in several of his art classes, had seen right through that rather vague statement, telling him he had exactly the right _fuck-em-dead_ outfit that he thought would be just perfect with Justin’s blue eyes and urging him to come right over so he could make sure.

 

As Justin turned around to gaze at his reflection in his friend’s full-length mirror attached to the back of the dorm room’s bedroom door, however, he had to admit – the royal blue silk shirt _did_ highlight the hints of silver in his pupils, and made his skin glow almost with luminescence where the V met the paleness of his neck.  And the pants – they seemed like they had been sewn just for him – they molded right over the curves of his ass in back, and were just tight enough in the groin area to direct a certain handsome brunet’s attention to his cock; that is, if he _wanted_ to do that.  Did he?  Why did he suddenly feel like he was playing with fire here and would wind up being consumed down to a pile of quivering ash before the night was over?  He shivered slightly at the thought. 

 

“Cold?” Jared asked, frowning; he didn’t think it was that chilly in his dorm room. 

 

Justin shook his head, not quite trusting his voice at the moment.  He had a feeling his friend already knew this was much more than just a simple ‘dinner date.’  As if reading his mind, he heard the other man say, “So who is this guy?  Must be pretty special to pull out all the stops.”  He eyed Justin carefully, knowing that his friend, with the schedule he had, seldom went out for anything resembling dates; it was like pulling teeth just to get him to go out for a drink or shoot pool with him, let alone go out clubbing or partying anywhere.  Justin was much too young – and hot – to take life so seriously.  If he was actually meeting another guy for dinner, he must really have it bad.  For a fleeting moment, Jared felt a twinge of jealousy, but he and Justin had long ago passed beyond any potential boyfriend status; they were in too many classes together and depended on retaining their friendship to risk fucking it up by complicating it with sex. That didn’t mean he still couldn’t be envious, though. 

 

He watched as his friend diverted his gaze before mumbling, “It’s just a guy I met at the hospital.”

 

“Uh, huh,” Jared replied dubiously from his sitting position on the bed.  “So you want to use some of my cologne?  The obscenely-expensive shit my parents got me for Christmas?  Guaranteed to drive a guy wild for you, even though I don’t think you need much help in that department with _that_ outfit on,” he commented.  “I may have to donate that one to you – you do it much better justice than I do.”

 

To his amusement, Justin actually covered his face briefly in his hands before turning to face him.  “You’re not helping me here, Campbell,” he retorted, twisting his mouth in anxiety.  “I’m nervous enough, trust me.”

 

“Then he IS someone special,” he observed smugly with a knowing grin as Justin rolled his eyes.  “And you’re not going to dish about him, are you?  You're just too _ethical_ , Taylor!”

 

Justin snorted.  “Yeah…that’s why I got suspended.” 

 

Jared smirked.  “Touché,” he said.  “But McKenzie’s just an asshole, along with the doctor who reported you.”  Justin had told him over the phone what had happened.  His friend’s eyes suddenly widened as a flash of knowledge hit him.  “Oh, my God!  It’s the same guy, isn’t it?  You’re having dinner with your _accomplice_!”  He placed his hands on his knees as he sat up straighter, waiting eagerly for his friend’s response.

 

Justin had to laugh in spite of himself over his friend’s melodramatic presentation.  “I’m not saying I am, and I’m not saying I’m not,” he told him mysteriously with a slight smile and a twinkling of his eyes, but they both knew his friend had hit the nail on the head.  He took a deep breath as the realization hit him that he was less than an hour away now from his dinner with Brian Kinney – _alone_.  “Just the same, though,” he couldn’t help adding, “Wish me luck, will you?  And get me that cologne.”

 

Jared smiled broadly and winked.  “Okay – but something tells me you won’t need either one.”

 

 

_Brian’s Loft – 7:20 p.m._

 

Brian hurriedly placed the metal, rectangular disposal containers in the oven and placed it on a low setting to keep the appetizers and entrees warm until Justin arrived; he opened the refrigerator to place the cherry cheesecake inside, his heart lurching just at bit as he noticed some leftover pizza still in its box inside, the same pizza he and his son had been happily munching on that night that Gus had become so ill not that long ago.  He hadn’t been to the grocery since Gus had come to visit that night, nor had he even bothered to clean out the leftovers in his refrigerator.  He had been way too concerned with Gus simply surviving until recently to worry about replenishing any food items.  He found it somewhat ironic that he was placing food into the refrigerator now to feed a man who had at least been partly responsible for making sure his son had survived.

 

Just as he closed the door, he heard his intercom buzzer sound, signaling his guest of honor had arrived.  His pulse quickened just a bit at the thought that finally he was going to get some private time with Justin, before he hurried over to the intercom near the door to press the button.  “Florence, is that you?” he quipped in a sing-song voice, biting his lower lip in amusement as he heard a distinctive huff on the other end.

 

“Yes…. _Leroy_ ,” was the expected retort.  “May I come up?”

 

Brian smiled at the petulance dripping from Justin’s voice.  _Yes, you certainly MAY come…._

 

“I’ll be waiting,” was the sexy drawl as he flipped the intercom off and glanced around the loft to give it one more final sweep of his critical gaze.  The lights had been turned down low – not low enough to look lesbionic, but just low enough to cast an intimate, softer glow throughout the large, industrial space.  There was light, sensual jazz music playing, the rich, sultry tones of a well-known saxophone player coming from the speakers of his nearby CD player, not loud or intrusive but just audible enough to set the scene for some serious getting-to-know-each-other-better conversation and as an effective background for Brian Kinney’s way of expressing his ‘gratitude’ to his son’s guardian angel…..Two wine goblets stood ready on the counter next to a large bottle of burgundy to help both of them become more ‘relaxed,’ and the dining room table was set with simple, crystal-clear dinner plates with maroon-colored, cloth dinner napkins and matching crystal water glasses.  All in all, it was tasteful and elegant but not too over the top. 

 

He sighed briefly, realizing it might not be over the top, but it was definitely over and beyond what he had ever done before for any man.  He once more wondered just what it was about this petite dynamo that so intrigued him.  He was certainly beautiful enough with his blond, golden hair, cranberry-colored, plump, soft lips, and alabaster-smooth skin.  And he was undeniably well-packaged, front and back; it hadn’t taken much, even through his clothing, to discern that.  But what exactly _was_ it about this man?  It wasn’t merely physical, although fuck knows he was extremely attracted to Justin; the man did things to his body temperature and heartbeat that should be illegal when they kissed.   And after seeing that drawing he had done for him, no one could deny how talented he was in art.  But there was something more there….

 

Was it because of how tender and compassionate he had been with Gus?  Was it because this man had gone out of his way to make sure his son was well-cared for, that _he_ was well-cared for?  Was it because he gave and never asked for anything in return other than his son recovering?  Who could have thought that such compassion could be so downright _sexy_?  Well, he wasn’t sure it was that exactly, but he was sure going to enjoy finding out.  As he heard a quiet knock on his door, his heart sped up involuntarily and he smiled.  Time to find out just where this was about to lead them…..

 

Justin swallowed hard as he stood at Brian’s door, waiting for it to be opened.  His heart was pounding in his chest and he felt sure it would explode from nervousness as he frantically tried to calm his pulse down to a more normal level.  At the rate he was going, he would need some CPR……. _Shit_!  That was the wrong thing to think, because it immediately set off images of him and Brian engaged in one of their hospital lip locks, exactly the thing that had caused him to be in so much trouble in the first place.  Why did he feel like he was about to get into _more_ trouble, though? 

 

As he heard the heavy metal door being slid open and got a look at Brian, he knew he had vastly misstated that concern, because his dinner companion was wearing an outfit that meant he didn’t stand a chance.  As Brian’s gaze slowly raked down his _own_ body, he flushed under the scrutiny as he stole his own glance of appreciation at the brunet’s silvery-maroon shirt stretched across his tight, firm shoulders and chest, and black pants that highlighted Brian’s long muscular legs no doubt honed by hours of working out at some gym.  He finally lifted his appreciative perusal away from the form-fitting jeans to risk gazing into Brian’s eyes that he found were boring into his; his heart began to pound even harder in both surprise and elation as he noticed the same lust-filled, heated expression reflecting back at him.

 

Brian’s eyes had widened as he got his first look at his visitor; he had seen Justin earlier today out of his orderly’s uniform, wearing a casual outfit of well-worn jeans and a long-sleeved tee shirt with the name of the hospital on it emblazoned across his chest.  Now, though, his breath caught in his throat at what Justin was wearing; fuck, this man was incredible!  His eyes slowly drunk in every detail from the head down, starting with those mesmerizing, blue eyes, full lips and slim neck, on down to the captivating peek of smooth, pale chest poking out of the V of Justin’s shirt, a royal-blue silky number that set off his eyes flawlessly and draped across his slender upper torso in just the right places before escaping inside a pair of light-blue Levi’s that seemed to be molded onto him, disclosing the promise of a well-endowed cock in front enclosed behind the denim but not well enough to escape his notice…..His gaze lingered longer than needed there, his thoughts immediately concentrating on what it would be like to reach out and grab the silky treasure that must be presently hidden inside, before at last he forced himself to lift his eyes to meet those of the other man’s.

 

“You’re just in time,” he drawled softly as he turned his body and held his arm out for Justin to enter. “Come on in.”  He couldn’t help standing by the door just long enough to admire Justin’s perfectly-curved ass before he finally swung the door closed and hoped that he had effectively shut off what would be his guest’s only route of escape….Because if things went the way he planned, he wasn’t planning on letting this man come up for air for hours……

 

Justin took a deep breath of nervousness and let it out as he walked further inside; his face warmed as he realized Brian hadn’t followed him.  He must still be standing by the door, which could only mean one thing:  he was ‘admiring the view.’   He licked his lips to wet them as he got his first look at where Brian lived; it was quite impressive befitting the successful man’s stature:  almost impossibly-high ceilings, exposed, metal beams reflecting the heritage of the building’s original purpose, sleek, designer furniture with curved, smooth lines, and an open floor plan with polished wooden floors.  It was elegantly appointed and masculine, just like its owner….His eyes fell upon a large portrait of a man, totally unclothed and posing in such a way that it left nothing to the imagination, who was standing prominent watch over the space like some erotic sentinel…..He wondered fleetingly if he would be attired in the same state of undress later on that evening before his thoughts were interrupted by his dinner host….

 

“See anything you like?” he heard Brian ask from behind in that velvety, sexy voice of his; he jumped a little as he realized the other man had somehow managed to approach so close to him he could feel his breath whispering on his neck.  He closed his eyes for a moment, chiding himself for his immature, childish reaction to a simple question, before he turned around slowly to observe Brian leaning casually against the bar counter with that maddening, endearing smirk on his face. 

 

Justin raised his chin a little higher in defiance, vowing not to come across as some shy, nervous little schoolboy.  “Yeah,” he said, meeting Brian’s gaze evenly.  “It’s quite a place.”

 

Brian nodded silently, still not quite believing he finally had Justin alone, and all to himself.  He knew they had a lot to say to each other, but he would have been lying if he hadn’t admitted he was thinking about some _other_ form of much more pleasurable communication at the moment.  For now, though, he instinctively knew he had to take things slow…..this was not a casual fuck he was looking at – this was someone special, very, very special……

 

“I’ve got dinner warming in the oven,” he told Justin, pushing himself off from the counter.  “How about some wine?” 

 

Justin nodded as he silently watched Brian walk over to the wine bottle and pull out the cork before pouring some of the dark liquid into two rounded goblets; he looked so sexy in the outfit he was wearing – every movement, every muscle rippled under the satiny shirt as he turned to walk toward him and extend one of the glasses out for him to take.  Their eyes met as Justin reached out to accept the glass; a small blaze of intense desire flashed through him as their fingers brushed against each other before he took the stem of the glass in his slightly-shaking hand and raised the rim to his lips.

 

Brian watched the full, perfectly-shaped lips of his dinner companion open slightly to drink some of the burgundy, watching Justin’s Adam’s apple move as he swallowed; his eyes widened and his cock twitched as he thought what it would feel like to have those perfectly-shaped lips sucking him off and that pale, smooth throat greedily swallowing his come after he had thrust his cock in and out of Justin’s mouth.  He had to hastily down a large gulp of his own wine before he found his voice to ask, “Want to go sit down on the couch for a while?”  He added softly, “We have a lot to discuss.”  How he was going to be able to keep his hands off this other man, though, was unfathomable to him as Justin nodded and led the way over to the couch, Brian watching the way his ass cheeks moved back and forth under the form-fitting fabric……He groaned softly at his body’s reaction while at the same time stunned at the power this diminutive blond had over him – and his heart.

 

Justin tentatively took a seat on the cream-colored, modern-looking sofa at the far end of it and gazed up as a little anxiously as Brian loomed over him.  He had the sensation that something larger than life was about to happen as Brian slowly lowered his long body on the sofa to sit mere inches away from him; he could have sworn he felt a minute movement on Brian’s part as their thighs came into contact with other and he could feel the warmth of Brian’s skin even through the fabric as he slowly raised his eyes to meet his.

 

Strains of a slow, erotic saxophone solo drifted toward them as he mutely watched Brian take his wine glass away from him and gently place both goblets down on the glass coffee table.  His eyes dilated as Brian stared into them before whispering, “I don’t think I gave you a _proper_ greeting before.”

 

The two men stared at each other intently before Brian slowly leaned in, placing one warm hand under the pale chin to lightly lift Justin’s face level with his own before his lips touched the full mouth, tentatively at first, almost hesitantly until he felt Justin pressing back and he instantly deepened the kiss, opening his mouth and seeking entrance with his tongue.  It was just as exquisite, if not more so, than the other times they had kissed but this time he knew there would be no one – or nothing – to disturb them.  He heard a soft moan of response as Justin opened his lips for him to deepen the kiss even more, his tongue swirling all over the inside of his mouth as Brian placed his hands on Justin’s upper arms and pushed them closer together. 

 

He was disappointed slightly when several seconds later he felt Justin pushing back against his chest; he had no doubt that his dinner companion could feel his rapidly-beating heart beneath his palms as he reluctantly broke off their kiss, staring into the wide-blue eyes and the flushed face of the man he had just kissed to within an inch of his life.  He could hear soft pants coming from his own lips as he whispered back, “What?”

 

Justin shook his head slightly, the blond’s swollen lips no doubt a reflection of what his own looked like at the moment; his heart was palpating furiously just over their kiss.  He watched as Justin reached up to place his fingers against his lips to softly explain, “I’m…..you know I’m attracted to you,” he began, gazing into his eyes.

 

Brian searched his face for the emotion hidden there before he said, “Well, it’s mutual then; I’m obviously attracted to you, too,” he admitted, realizing that had to be a given.  He thought, _who wouldn’t be_?  And he was sure his actions toward Justin had been pretty apparent regarding that.  “So what’s wrong?” 

 

Justin bit his lip, looking for a moment like a scared little boy, just the thing he had been trying to avoid.  What _was_ the problem?  Brian obviously wanted him, and he obviously wanted Brian.  They were two healthy, consenting adults and fuck knows he had fantasized about this for a long time now, practically ever since he had laid eyes on this enormously sexy and handsome man.  He wasn’t naïve – he knew when Brian had asked him here for dinner, he wanted to do a lot more than just _talk_ , and frankly, so did he.  So what was the harm in expressing what both of them were yearning to do?

 

But he longed to know – he _had_ to know – if there was more to them than just some strong physical attraction.  Because he knew he cared for Brian more than for just a sexual partner.  He continued to internalize incoherent thoughts as Brian lazily rubbed his thumbs across the fabric of the shirt; it was hard to think, let alone talk, with this man touching him like that…..

 

 

 

“I……I thought you wanted to talk,” he struggled to point out, his voice almost breathless as he averted his gaze; the longer he stared into those golden eyes, the less his resolve was fading to care one way or the other; the impetus to just go at like two animals in heat was getting stronger and stronger the longer they sat so close together and he felt Brian’s touch….

 

Where he got the fortitude to do it, he’ll never know; but he pulled back just enough to look evenly into Brian’s eyes to remind him, “You said we had a lot to discuss.” Even though he somehow knew things were about to change irrevocably between them, he still wanted to know what Brian needed to say – he was fervently hoping it would echo his own feelings. 

 

Brian sighed in resignation; yes, he had told Justin that.  And as much as he wanted to lay this beautiful blond promptly down on his back on the couch and fuck him senseless, he also had promised to talk to him, to get to know him better, and he still wanted that, too.  But he wanted _him_ so badly at the moment, he could hardly stand it…..With great difficulty, then, he forced himself to drop his hands from Justin’s shoulders and reach to pick up his drink.  He eyed his companion carefully as he took a sip before cradling it in his lap with both hands, partly to steady it but mainly to help keep his hands off his beautiful guest.  “Yes, I did,” Brian told him softly. 

 

Justin exhaled a deep breath, trying to calm his breathing.  He mimicked Brian’s action by picking up his own glass and taking a small drink, needing some type of anchor to hold onto; the coldness of the glass seemed to blunt just a little of Brian’s close proximity, as bracing it on his left leg, he whispered, “What did you want to talk about, then?” 

 

Brian smiled slightly.  Where should he start?  There was so much to say, so much to tell him….. He decided to start with what his friend had revealed to him.  “I went to find you the other day when Gus was due to be discharged; Dr. Chanders told me why you weren’t there.”

 

Justin’s eyes widened in surprise as he felt embarrassment creep into his cheeks.  “She did? Everything?”

 

Brian nodded as he scowled, growling, “They had no fucking right to do that, Justin.”

 

“Well, I didn’t exactly agree with Dr. McKenzie’s opinion about my conduct being _inappropriate_ to the hospital,” he told Brian cryptically.  “But he’s the Chief of Staff; there wasn’t much I could do about it.  That didn’t meant I liked it, though.  But what could I do, Brian?  I’m just an orderly there.”

 

“Don’t sell yourself short, Justin,” the brunet rebuked him promptly.  “You’re not just ‘ _some orderly’_ ; I saw the effect you had on Gus and some of the other children while I was there.  You care about what you do and you go way above and beyond what’s expected of you.  Those kids need someone to help make them feel better while they’re patients; they need someone to make them happy and make them laugh; you do that.  You should hold your head up high and not let what that fucker did drag you down.”

 

Justin smiled in gratitude over Brian’s heartfelt statement.  “That means a lot to me,” he whispered, his voice choked with emotion all of a sudden.  “I really miss being around them.  It makes me feel so good to think I’m helping them in some way.”

 

Brian gazed into his eyes before saying, “You are, believe me.”  He twisted one side of his mouth upward.  “You’ve practically replaced me with Gus already,” he teased.

 

Justin shook his head with a smile.  “No….I seriously doubt that; I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Brian – and the way you look at _him_.” 

 

Brian nodded as he continued to stare into the intense blue eyes.  “I know you have – it’s the same way you drew us in your drawing.”

 

Justin diverted his gaze, for some reason uncomfortable to have so much of the spotlight.  “You got it, then.”

 

Brian smiled over at him tenderly.  “Yeah, I got it.  And the letter addressed to my alias,” he said as Justin raised his head to look over at him with a grin.  The brunet’s voice softened as he added, “That drawing you made – Justin, it was very realistic.”  He really wanted to say more than that, but he always found it so difficult.  He was never one to gush over something, and he wouldn’t start now.  But he wanted Justin to know just the same how much that drawing meant to him.  “You have an incredible artistic talent,” he told him sincerely.  “And I was…..touched that you would do that for me.”

 

Justin flushed at all the compliments.  “It….it was nothing,” he murmured.  “Just something I drew up, mainly for Gus,” he persisted.

 

Brian smiled.  “That’s funny – the envelope inside definitely had my name on it, and I could have sworn Lindsay told me you asked her to give it to me.”  He watched as Justin blushed in response, answering the statement without saying a word.  “I want you to know it has a special place in my bedroom,” he told the blond.  “Maybe you’d like to see it,” he added huskily, unable to keep the hopefulness in his tone from escaping just a little.

 

Justin followed Brian’s gaze over to a separate room, elevated slightly from the main room.  Just the thought of being in that private chamber, alone with this sexy man, caused all sorts of wild thoughts to enter his mind.  “I……maybe later,” he finally managed to utter somewhat helplessly as Brian grinned at him knowingly; he quickly took another sip of his wine to try and calm his nerves, afraid to look over at Brian for fear his true desires were written all over his face.

 

“I went to see him, by the way,” Brian said abruptly as Justin looked over at him and frowned. 

 

“Who?”

 

“Your homophobic boss,” he growled as Justin’s eyes grew big as saucers.

 

“You went to see Dr. McKenzie?  Fuck!” he exclaimed, his mouth agape.  “Why?”

 

“To tell him what a shithead he was,” Brian snarled.  “To tell him what an asshole the doctor was for reporting what he saw.  To tell him what a big mistake he was making.  And to tell him what a piece of shit I thought he and this other nameless doctor were for what they did.”

 

Justin shook his head in stunned amazement.  “You _did_ that?”  Brian nodded his head.  “Shit!  What did he _say_?” He balanced his wine glass on his knee with one hand, the drink all but forgotten now…..

 

“He didn’t say much,” Brian told him regretfully.  “Cited confidentiality bullshit or something like that.  But he definitely found out how _I_ felt before I left.”

 

Justin continued to stare at him incredulous.  “You did that for _me_?” he asked in awe, amazed that such a successful, affluent man like Brian Kinney would care enough about his welfare to go to bat for him like that.

 

“I did it for everyone who’s ever been discriminated against just for being a queer; I despise bigoted homophobes,” he snarled.  Justin nodded, thinking that made perfect sense; Brian would never be the kind of man to sit still if he thought he or anyone else was being targeted because of their lifestyle.  He noticed Brian place his glass back down on the coffee table to turn toward him and nod. “But….. I mainly did it for _you,”_ he verified, gazing into Justin’s eyes intently.

 

Justin’s heart began to pound at the intense look Brian was giving him.  “I…..I don’t know what to say,” Justin replied softly, looking down in his lap in sudden self-consciousness.  He watched Brian reach over and take his glass away from him, feeling another jolt of electricity pass through his body as Brian’s fingers brushed once more against his.  He followed Brian’s movements as the brunet rose to his feet and extended his hand downward toward him, the strands of a sultry tune softly playing overhead.  “Dance with me,” the man commanded huskily, leaving no room in his tone for Justin to refuse, not that he would have wanted to anyway. 

 

Feeling a little like some vulnerable gazelle about to be lured into a sexy cheetah’s clutches, he placed his smaller hand in Brian’s as the man tugged him forcefully to his feet.  Brian pulled him by his wrist over toward the center of the room before taking him in his arms, his hands sliding around to link behind Justin’s back to hold him tightly against his body as he involuntarily gasped in response to the close contact. 

 

As they began to sway in time to the music, Justin placed his hands against Brian’s chest and held on for dear life; the charge that had swept through his body simply by a touching of their hands before was nothing compared to what he was feeling now.  His heart was hammering in his chest as it threatened to explode, and each time Brian’s groin brushed against his cock, it sent shock waves of pleasure shooting through him. 

 

Brian watched, entranced, as Justin’s skin practically glowed under the effects of the soft lighting; as the blond shyly raised his silver-blue eyes to gaze into his own somewhat uncertainly, he was captivated by this young man’s beauty and compassion.  He leaned over to brush his lips across Justin’s pale, smooth neck.  “You’re so fucking hot,” he whispered near his ear, hearing a small sound like a surprised “oh” escape the perfect lips….the lips that were just ripe for plucking.  He pulled back just enough to stare Justin in the eyes, observing the pink-tinged cheeks as he slowly leaned in to touch the warm, soft mouth with a whisper of a kiss on the corner, trailing his lips across his cheek and down his neck again, nuzzling his head against the soft hair of his nape as he felt Justin shiver in his embrace.  Why did he feel so tender around this man all of a sudden?  Normally at this stage anything remotely resembling foreplay would have been dismissed immediately, and he would have been furiously ripping the clothes off this man to fuck him right where they stood.  But with Justin, there was something about him, something almost fragile, almost delicate like some fine china.  His suspicion that this man was going to be the long-term exception to his ‘one-fuck-only’ policy was quickly being proven; the thought was exhilarating but it still scared the shit out of him.  He had never ‘done’ emotional entanglements before, and he had no idea where this would all end up.  One thing he _did_ know, though – he had to find out, because he knew Justin expected more from him, _demanded_ more from him in order for them to be together. 

 

With extreme reluctance, therefore, he pulled back to gaze at his guest’s face to whisper, “Ready for dinner?” 

 

Justin looked at him in shock; his lips were tingling with anticipation over what no doubt would be yet another passionate kiss and Brian was pulling back from him for dinner?  He quickly covered his disappointment as he swallowed before nodding, not trusting his voice to come out as a sort of choked squeak if he were to try to speak.  Brian placed his arm lightly around his waist and began to lead him over toward the dining room, pausing just long enough to scoop up their glasses to carry them over to the table with them.

 

“Have a seat, Florence, and I’ll get our first course,” he said with a smirk; Justin found himself relaxing a little at his cutesy nickname.  Brian didn’t seem any different to him – still talking with just a hint of sarcasm mixed in with his quirky sense of humor – but he still couldn’t quite figure out why he had stopped just as they were about to kiss again.  He followed Brian’s movements as he walked over toward the kitchen and pulled the oven door open with a couple of cloth mitts to retrieve a small, rectangular disposable aluminum tray.  Placing it down on top of the smooth-top stove, he reached into one of the overhead cabinets to retrieve a couple of small, matching crystal appetizer plates and set them down next to the covered pan. 

 

“Can I help?” Justin called from his place at the table. 

 

Brian pondered that for a second, deciding he wouldn’t mind having his delectable dinner guest underfoot – at least until he could hopefully be under him in his bed.  “Why don’t you pour us some more wine?” he suggested, as Justin pushed back from his chair and walked over with the two goblets to join him. 

 

He scrunched up his nose adorably, at least in Brian’s estimation, as he walked up next to Brian and enthused, “Something smells wonderful.” 

 

Brian looked at him intently.  “Yes, it does,” he agreed, leaving no doubt he wasn’t talking about the food and making Justin blush once more.  He was finding this whole, almost flirty, coquettish side to Brian enormously sexy and appealing and he found he couldn’t get enough.  Of course, it also made him horny as hell, too, a problem he was having a hard time disguising at the moment; he could feel the tightness in his pants as overt evidence of that fact.  He reddened even deeper as Brian’s gaze swept down to his groin and he smirked, knowing full well the effect he was having on him.  He couldn’t help registering a certain satisfaction, though, in realizing that he was having the same result on Brian; the man’s pants had become even more form-fitting since they had first met earlier tonight. 

 

Justin cleared his throat as he set Brian’s wine glass down next to him on the kitchen counter and took another sip from his own goblet.  “What is it?” he asked curiously, nodding toward the plan as he smelled a faint hint of Parmesan.  

 

“Garlic Butter Parmesan Shrimp,” Brian advised his guest, who smiled in appreciation.  Brian pulled off the metal top of the container to expose the plump, jumbo shrimp swimming in an aromatic butter sauce.  He had initially meant to scoop them up with tongs with the intention of placing them on the plates, but he suddenly had a better idea.  Reaching in to pull a shrimp out by its tail, he held a towel under it. Holding the slippery shrimp between his two fingers, he extended it out to Justin and huskily whispered to him, “ _Taste it_.”

 

Justin’s eyes darkened with desire as he locked gazes with Brian; never taking his eyes off the sexy man, he somehow found the courage to take hold of Brian’s wrist to steady the brunet’s hand before he opened his lips and allowed Brian to slide the shrimp inside as he took bit down on the crustacean, latching onto Brian’s fingers as his lips made an ‘O’ shape around them before Brian ever so slowly pulled his fingers back out, now wet with Justin’s saliva.

 

 Brian thought he had never seen, or felt, anything more erotically arousing in his entire life as he reached over to snag another shrimp.  “More,” he whispered as a statement, not a question as he reenacted the same motion again, this time taking even longer to remove his fingers from Justin’s mouth.  As he pulled them out and placed the remaining shrimp tail down on top of the aluminum lid, he turned around to notice a small amount of sauce that had dripped out of Justin’s mouth; Justin’s eyes widened slightly as the brunet leaned down and swabbed the buttery liquid up with his tongue.  As their eyes locked, he was unable to withstand the temptation any longer as he promptly grabbed Justin roughly by the shoulders and slammed their bodies together as he plastered his lips onto his companion’s.  Quickly angling his head to deepen the penetration, he heard a groan escape either his or Justin’s lips – he wasn’t sure and he didn’t care, either; he was too caught up in the emotions coursing through his body as they started to tongue-fuck each other’s mouths to figure it out. 

 

He took one hand and possessively placed it at the back of Justin’s head, telling him silently that he was his and he wasn’t going anywhere as they continued to kiss, hands groping and caressing as their legs tangled together.  Two steel-hard cocks brushed together encased in denim, crying out desperately for release, as the kiss went on and on…..

 

“I want you so fucking badly,” Brian growled as they finally came up for air, both men’s chests heaving over the exertion.  “I want to eat that teasing little ass all night long and fuck you so many times you’ll _need_ this week off just to recover.”

 

Justin trembled over the sultry, controlling tone of Brian’s voice; he couldn’t deny his strong feelings for this man.  But for some odd reason, he found himself hesitating, his insecurities flaring to the surface.  Once he and Brian had fucked, would he find his ass promptly out on the street tomorrow, never to return?  He knew that once he surrendered his heart as well as his body to this man, there would be no going back for him; could he continue to satisfy and excite a man as dominating and powerful as Brian Kinney was, though?

 

“Brian,” Justin breathed out as he struggled to control his body’s reaction and think; a few seconds more and he knew they would both be standing there totally nude and fucking each other’s brains out on the kitchen table or even the floor – that was how badly his body was crying out for this man….. 

 

Brian, however, barely heard his soft protest as he reached over and began to unbutton Justin’s shirt to expose more of the creamy, smooth skin underneath.  He leaned down and licked a wet trail with his tongue from Justin’s clavicle to his left shoulder as he pushed the fabric partially off Justin’s body.  “So beautiful,” Brian murmured in appreciation, nuzzling his cheek against the warm skin as Justin shivered in reaction.  “So fucking beautiful,” he repeated, oblivious to Justin’s internal conflict. 

 

“Brian, wait,” he breathlessly implored, finally taking his hands to cradle the brunet’s head to raise it up and force him to stop.  Brian slowly lifted his eyes to lock onto Justin’s, puzzlement on his face; there was no way he could mistake Justin’s response to his overtures – he wanted him just as he badly as he did.  “Bed?” he whispered huskily, misinterpreting Justin’s plea as he swooped down for another brief kiss.  He was more than happy to move things into the bedroom, as he took hold of the slender wrist and started to tug Justin toward his king-sized bed to continue what they had started.

 

“No,” Justin choked out, feeling almost dizzy after being thoroughly kissed by this man; Brian stopped their forward motion finally to turn and place his arms around Justin’s waist. 

 

“What?” he asked softly, impatient to continue their lovemaking but anxious to know what had caused the beautiful face to suddenly frown.  “You want to eat first?” he drawled.  “That’s exactly what I had in mind, too…..”  His hands somehow managed to sneak inside Justin’s shirt from behind and began to make lazy, circular patterns all over his back, making Justin’s body temperature shoot up dramatically at the sensation of skin-on-skin as he shivered again.

 

He shook his head, struggling to speak.  He had never been one for one-night, casual fucks; if he was with a man, he was with him, body and soul.  He had to be sure….. “Brian…..”

 

The brunet stared into the blue eyes, anxious to know what was amiss, but he couldn’t wait much longer for this moment; he had waited way too long already and he knew it wouldn’t take much to throw him over the edge.  “Justin…… God; just tell me what you want.  You’re driving me crazy here.”

 

Justin flushed at the urgent tone in Brian’s voice and the lust-filled expression on his face.  The brunet’s eyes bored into his as he continued to caress his back slowly, almost unknowingly, but Justin was feeling every long-fingered movement intensely.  “I……I need to know something, Brian; the truth now,” he said with amazing firmness, surprised at the clear tone of his voice.

 

Brian shook his head slightly, flummoxed.  They were about to finally fuck and Justin was going philosophical on him?  “What?” he asked quietly sighing in resignation.  “Tell me what you need to know.”  _Tell me so we can move on to more pleasurable matters….._

 

“I…..I need to know what I mean to you,” he whispered, averting his eyes in embarrassment over having to ask and come off as some needy little twink. 

 

Brian’s hands stilled on his warm, soft skin.  “What you mean to me?” he almost dumbly repeated.

 

Justin nodded, swallowing the hard, nervous lump in his throat.  “What _am_ I to you, Brian?” he asked plaintively. 

 

Brian huffed slightly, somewhat irritated that just as they were finally about to do what he had been fantasizing about for days now, Justin wanted to discuss their ‘feelings.’  “Justin….why are we having this discussion now?”

 

“Why not?” the blond countered, a little aggravated now that Brian seemed to be brushing off his concerns.  “What am I to you, Brian?” he repeated again, this time a little more loudly.

 

“Well, right now you’re kind of a pain in the ass, and not in a good way,” Brian hissed, opening his mouth before his brain had time to think. He winced as Justin seemed to almost flinch at his sarcastic words; why the hell did he always find it so hard to express how he felt to someone, especially someone who meant so much to him?  He cursed himself silently for being such a dumbass when, with alarm, he felt Justin pushing himself away from him.

 

“Justin….”

 

The blond wrenched himself away from Brian’s embrace.  “That’s what I was afraid of!” he cried out as he started tucking his shirt back into his jeans and buttoning it.   “You’d say anything to get me into bed with you!  Well, I don’t do one-night stands, Mr. Kinney!  You’ll have to find some other man to nurse your ego!” 

 

He started to stomp over to the front door, having to unfortunately stop to pull the door back to open it.  As he hesitated, Brian didn’t have any problems whatsoever catching up to him as he grabbed Justin’s upper arm and spun him around.

 

“Let me go!” Justin cried out angrily, but Brian merely pulled him back into his arms and held him in a vise. 

 

“No fucking way, Justin Taylor!” he growled.  “You and I are going to have a talk – a _long_ talk!  You wanted to know how I feel about you and you’re damn well going to _listen_!” he said, his eyes blazing. “Now I can either drag you back over to the couch – I said the COUCH! – or you can walk over there yourself.  Which is it going to be?” he asked, his eyes boring into Justin’s and leaving no room for compromise.  Brian realized he may be emotionally handicapped when it comes to expressing his true feelings, but this man was far too important.  He wasn’t about to let him leave without hashing things out first; in fact, he wasn’t planning on letting him leave at all – at least not until he understood just what he meant to him.  The thought of emoting to anyone terrified him, but he had to do it or risk losing Justin before he even had him.  Why did he have to go and get attached to a sentimental, hearts-and-flowers type of man who wore his heart on his sleeve?  He didn’t know, but he DID know one thing – he wasn’t letting him go that easily…..

 

“So, Florence……what’s it going to be?”

 

Justin glared at him for a few seconds, realizing he was no match for Brian’s brute strength.  He had no real idea what Brian was going to say, but his heart told him to give him a chance.  He sighed in annoyance.  “All right – you’ve got fifteen minutes.”


	14. Bedside Manners

Brian watched Justin trod over to the couch and unceremoniously plop down on the far edge; if he had gotten any closer to the end of the furniture, he would have been sitting on the arm instead. Feeling all of a sudden like he had the plague or something, Brian sighed softly as he followed Justin over; hesitating for just a moment, he finally decided to sit somewhere in the middle of the couch, not quite brushing up against his dinner guest, but close enough to almost feel the affronted heat pouring off him. The last thing he wanted to do was encourage Justin to flee; his dinner guest was already skittish as it was, and despite his initial aggravation over Justin wanting to turn all philosophical on him, even he realized they had a lot to discuss tonight.

 

He had meant what he had said about not letting Justin leave; not exactly one to resort to strong-arm tactics (then again, he normally didn't have to, either, when it came to getting a man to share his bed), he would have definitely drug Justin over here to the couch if the blond had refused to come of his own accord. That was how important this was to him. He didn't quite know what it was about this young, feisty man, so atypical of his normal encounters, which so fascinated him and made him feel things he wasn't even aware he could feel. But as Justin stared back at him with nervous anticipation, his eyes a mesmerizing shade of blue like the clearest ocean, he knew there could be no going back; nor would he want to.

 

"Well?" Justin said softly as he hugged his hands around his body almost in a defensive posture; just sitting near this man did all sorts of crazy things to his insides. There was no denying his tremendous attraction to Brian on a physical level, and something told him his heart was about to take the same dramatic leap, but before he fell irrevocably over the precipice of his emotions, he had to know if Brian felt anywhere near the same way….It was important to him that he knew Brian didn't just consider him a one-time deal.

 

Brian sighed as he stared at Justin's rigid posture; his back was against the arm of the couch as he looked over at him cautiously. "You want me to get out a stopwatch, Justin? Am I down to only _14_ minutes now?" He couldn't help the sarcastic comment; it was his typical defense mechanism when he was feeling insecure and unsure of how to proceed and this was definitely uncharted waters for him.

 

Justin huffed, choosing not to rise to the bait. "What I want is for you to be honest with me, Brian. I already told you; I'm not here for a one-night fuck and a _thank you, it was great, now get out_ in the morning speech. And I don't want to be your pity fuck, either, because you feel responsible for what happened at the hospital." He uncrossed his arms and held them out as he eyed Brian warily; guarding his body as well as his heart from what he feared might come. "I want something more from you….from this."

 

Justin hadn't had much experience falling in love; oh, he had had a few infatuations in the short span of his sexual experience, but nothing like this; this was not the pangs of young love for a first crush or the brief high of some encounter at one of the dance clubs. Even though he didn't have any other equivalent experiences to compare _this_ to, he knew nonetheless – this was _it_ ; this was what it felt like to fall in love, to give your heart to someone else. It was a physical rush, definitely, but it was so much more than that. It was a need to be near that person and think of him constantly, to never be able to get them out of your mind, no matter what you were doing or where you were. He knew that was certainly the case with him when it came to Brian. He dreamed about the man at night, the brunet holding him in his arms and never letting him go as they made love all night long, their bodies spooned together in sweaty, sated contentment afterward. Then he daydreamed about him during the day when he was at home, even while longing to be back at work with the children. The emotions he felt just by being around Brian, by the man looking at him as if he were the only man in the world, made his heart do somersaults and when they touched, it was unlike anything he had ever felt before – electric, powerful, all-consuming. He desperately wanted to believe that Brian's feelings were genuine for him and that he possessed more than just a desire to make him his next temporary, triumphant conquest. Either way, he had to know; once he gave his heart to this man he knew he would never be able to protect it from him – or take it back.

 

Brian brushed his hand through his hair, suddenly nervous as a school boy about to get his first blow job. What was the power this slender young blond had over him to make him feel this way? It made him want to stand up and bolt himself; laying his emotions out in the open was more terrifying to him than driving around the Indy 500 track at 200 mph, but if he were successful, the payback would be more than worth it.

 

Brian turned his body slightly to face Justin, their knees coming into slight contact with each other as he did so. He noticed a visible jolt from his companion at their accidental touch, and he marveled at the feelings dredged up inside his own body just from that incidental contact. Justin's reaction, unfortunately, was to scoot over just enough to move away from him. He knew it wasn't done out of repulsion or avoidance; he could tell that Justin wanted him just as much as he desired _him_. That realization gave him the additional strength to try and tell this man exactly what was in his heart.

 

"That's not why I asked you here, Justin," he began softly. "And I think you know that." He stared into the intense blue eyes, so pensive and apprehensive. Was Justin that unsure of his feelings for him? "Don't you?" he pressed.

 

Justin licked his lips and bit down on the lower flesh thoughtfully, his hopes warring with his uncertainty. "I…..I want to believe you," he finally whispered almost shyly as Brian's heart sang hopefully at the admission.

 

The brunet reached over and took Justin's hand between the two of his to slowly knead the soft flesh under his fingers; he could feel a slight trembling in response. "Then believe it," he urged Justin. "Because I do care about you…..and not just because you take good care of your patients – and their fathers."

 

He was rewarded with a slight smile in reaction to his light-hearted teasing as Justin corrected softly, "Just _one_ father."

 

Brian's lips twisted in an amused smile. "Good…..because I wouldn't wanna go after them just like I did McKenzie. He didn't hit on you, _too_ , did he?" he asked.

 

Justin huffed out a short laugh. "No…..He was too busy suspending me." Brian was disappointed to see his companion's smile fade at the thought of what had happened; it simply served to remind him of his part in all of it. It also reminded him of something else he wanted to talk to Justin about.

 

"Maybe that might turn out to be a good thing," Brian commented mysteriously as he stared into Justin's eyes; his heart dropped as Justin snatched his hand away in misunderstanding. _Smooth move there, Kinney…._

 

"A _good_ _thing_?" he repeated angrily, his face flushed and his eyes flashing. "Suspending me for a week without pay and preventing me from taking care of the children is a _good thing_? If you feel that way, _Mr. Kinney_ , then you don't really know me at all." He made a move to get up but Brian promptly grabbed his leg firmly to push him back down onto the couch; to Justin's consternation he wound up practically sitting on Brian's lap this time with his legs splayed over Brian's thighs, a fact the brunet took advantage of as he promptly wound his arms around Justin's waist and prevented him from moving further away.

 

"Is this the only way you can make someone stay – by restraining them?" Justin growled as he struggled to get up; his precarious position, however, prevented him from succeeding. "Let me go!"

 

"No way," Brian retorted, tightening his grip even more. "You promised me fifteen minutes, and I'm sure I've only used up five so far – that entitles me to at least ten more, and you're damned well going to give them to me!" He harrumphed. "You are the most stubborn man I've ever met, Justin Taylor; will you just fucking listen to me for a change?"

 

Justin continued to try and free himself, but with his hands effectively pinned to his sides by a pair of muscular arms he was no match for the stronger man. He finally rolled his eyes in disgust and fell back against the end of the couch in defeat. "Do I have a choice?"

 

Brian rolled his lips under. "No, you don't," he finally responded, his voice a little softer now. "What I was trying to say – before you so rudely interrupted me – is that you're wasting your talent there. Come and work for ME."

 

Justin blinked his eyes in disbelief, his anger quickly dissipating as he looked at Brian in shock, unable to believe what he had just heard. "Work….work for _you_?"

 

Brian nodded. "I could use your talent – your _artistic_ talent," he added at Justin's skeptical look; he had a feeling Justin thought he was only offering him this opportunity to get into his pants and while that was a quite attractive, possible side benefit, it wasn't the main reason. "I'm always looking for employees that are the best at what they do, and after looking at that sketch of me and Gus that you drew, you have it in spades."

 

Despite his misgivings, Justin found himself blushing at Brian's words of praise; of course, the fact that he could feel Brian's hands splayed out over his lower back and slowly caressing him didn't help him to speak coherently, either. "You do?"

 

Brian smiled at his look of incredulity; did he not realize just how gifted he was? "Yes…you are so fucking talented, Justin, and I only employ the best. They can't be paying you shit over at the hospital anyway; to hell with McKenzie and the other homophobic assholes. Come to Kinnetik and work for me – you'd get double benefits from it."

 

Justin could feel his hands getting numb where they were firmly cradled to his side; Brian hadn't let up on his grip since he had pulled him back down – if anything he was holding onto him even tighter than before. "Double benefits?" he whispered, still reeling almost with dizziness at Brian's touch; he had to look away from the intense look Brian was giving him to concentrate on trying to sound rational.

 

He temporarily mourned inside as he felt Brian release his grip on him, but then let out a soft gasp of surprise as the brunet put one elegant hand under his chin and lifted his head to force him to gaze into his eyes. "Yeah," he huskily said as he stared at him intently. "You would get handsomely paid to do your job and I happen to know that you would also have special, exclusive fucking privileges with the boss whenever and wherever you wish; that is, if that's what you wanted." He didn't want Justin to think he would force him into that sort of relationship just to keep his job. While the thought of what they could be doing in his office – on the desk, on the couch, and in his personal bathroom – made his cock harden and twitch almost instantly in anticipation, it was vital that he make sure Justin knew it wasn't a requisite for him being hired.

 

Justin's face turned an even darker shade of pink at the sexy tone of Brian's voice; that and his mention of 'fringe benefits' made his body tingle in anticipation. _God….he could drown in those eyes…._

 

It was so tempting to take Brian up on his unexpected offer; he was sure Brian would definitely pay more than what the hospital was paying him – at least when he wasn't suspended and was actually drawing a salary – and the other 'side benefit' had its appeal as well, but was it the right move for him? Before he was suspended, he hadn't realized just how much of an impact the children he was exposed to on a daily basis had not only made on his art but on his life; just seeing a sick child's eyes light up at the sight of him visiting or helping them paint, or seeing a smile on a child who hadn't done so in days due to their pain, brought such an unbelievable sense of joy and accomplishment to him. No amount of extra salary could ever replace the high he got from knowing he was making a difference in those children's lives….

 

Yet he was still very distressed over his suspension and the narrow-mindedness of some of the people there, although he suspected he could run into that anywhere and at any job. No doubt Brian wouldn't put up with it at Kinnetik once he knew about such situations and would obviously have the power to eliminate any outright homophobic employees at will, but that didn't mean it wouldn't occur there from time to time as well. Should he give up on something that brings him such fulfillment to himself and joy to others just because of a few, thoughtless, bigoted people?

 

Brian held his breath as he stared into the beautiful blond's eyes; he could almost see the thought wheels turning inside his head as he contemplated his unexpected offer. He thought this would be the perfect solution for Justin, and he hoped he felt that way as well. If he had learned one thing about this particular man, though, it was that he didn't always react the way he thought he would. To Brian, that made him quite fascinating but also frustrating as hell.

 

"I'm flattered, Brian….," he heard his companion say.

 

He frowned; he could hear a distinctive 'but' about to emerge from the gloriously-full lips and he couldn't believe it. Was he being turned down _twice_ , professionally as well as personally? "But….?" he prodded as he moved his hand to curve it around Justin's cheek, watching the golden lashes briefly flutter closed at his touch as he relished the soft skin underneath and found himself wanting to feel _more_ of that skin on other parts of the slender body.

 

Justin bit his lower lip, still undecided what to do; his logical side told him to take the damn job and the higher salary, but his heart told him not to abandon all the children who needed him. He finally sighed softly in regret, knowing he was an idiot perhaps, but also knowing what his answer had to be. "My job means a lot to me," Justin found himself saying as he opened his eyes and looked at Brian, surprising even himself. He was finding it increasingly hard to concentrate the longer Brian touched him anyway. "The…..the children need me," he struggled to say.

 

To the blond's relief and sanity, Brian dropped his hand from Justin's cheek, but the moment of respite was only temporary as he took Justin's right hand in his; he idly rubbed his thumb over the soft flesh as he replied, "Justin, your feisty little doctor friend told me you were going to have a hard time going without pay next week. Sometimes you have to sacrifice a little nobility for reality; principles don't pay the utility bills or buy food. Let me help you and you can give McKenzie a big _fuck you_ while you're at it. You need a job and I want you around; we _both_ win this way."

 

Well, Justin thought, he supposed at the moment that was as much of an admission that Brian wanted more than just a casual fuck out of him that he would get, at least for now, but it wasn't exactly a declaration of undying love, either. He knew in a way that Brian was right, though; he realized McKenzie had 'proper procedures' to follow, but the unpaid suspension he had been given still upset him greatly and it had turned his world upside down. He felt like a ship tossing wildly lost in an unchartered sea without his job, and he felt empty and unimportant. Through his art, he tried to give the children something to take their minds off their pain and their problems; what he had received in return was so much more. The children gave him a purpose in life and a meaning to his art. It made him feel like he was making a difference in their lives. Brian was right – nobility was a poor substitute for good, old-fashioned cash, but what he gave those children and what they gave him in return couldn't be measured in dollars and cents.

 

As painful as a week without pay would be, then, he made his decision; he was still having a hard time verbalizing it, though, as Brian continued to gently rub his thumb across the top of his hand, each stroke causing his body temperature to rise accordingly. "Like I said," he told Brian finally, struggling to speak. "I'm flattered, but the answer is no. I want to stay at the hospital."

 

Brian huffed out a small breath of disappointment, not so much because Kinnetik wouldn't have the advantage of Justin's unique artistic talent, but frankly, because he wouldn't get to see him on a daily basis. While his son had been so ill, he had found himself looking forward to Justin's interaction with him – it had provided a small bit of comfort and a sort of lifeline during such a horrid, trying period. Over time, though, it had become much more than just a pleasant diversion from the stress over his son's condition; he had found himself drawn to the other man by his personality, vitality, sense of humor, and compassion. Somewhere along the line, he had started to care deeply for this man, and now he couldn't let him go – he _wouldn't_.

 

"Justin," he tried once more. He took his other hand in his now, noticing the blue eyes widen perceptibly as he pointed out, "I admire you for wanting to help those children; hell, if it hadn't been at least partly for you, I'm convinced Gus would have been a lot worse off than he was while he was hospitalized, and I really think he wouldn't have recovered so quickly. And he's become very fond of his 'Orly.' So has his father," he admitted softly, looking down to avoid staring into the sapphire eyes for fear he would give too much away. He wasn't used to feeling such intense emotions for another man, let alone verbalizing them, so he found himself actually frightened by how deeply he was falling for Justin. He finally lifted his head, though, to look into his companion's eyes, finding his surprised gaze locked on his. He licked his lips nervously before saying, "I'm not going to lie to you, Justin. I'd like having you around on a daily basis, so that would definitely be a perk to having you work for me. I've missed seeing you," he admitted a little self-consciously. "But it's much more than that; this is a great opportunity for you to showcase your artistic ability, and I'm sure it would pay a damned sight more than what you're making as an orderly at the hospital. Can't you see that?"

 

"I'm sure it would," Justin agreed readily, still trying to get past Brian's admission about how he felt about him; that was what he had been searching for ever since he got here this evening, and at last Brian was beginning to lay his feelings for him out on the line. He somehow instinctively knew how hard that must be for someone like him to admit. "But I feel like I'm where I need to be, where I _have_ to be. I'll manage somehow until I can go back to work."

 

Brian sighed in disappointment, frustrated that he couldn't help Justin, but perhaps even _more_ disappointed that he wasn't able to persuade him to come work for him so he could see him all the time. He leaned over closer to his companion, whose blue eyes widened in response, whispering, "I'm not giving up that easily, Justin; I've got at least five more minutes to change your mind," he drawled out in a silky voice, noticing just the tip of a pink tongue emerging to nervously wet the inviting lips. His gaze automatically lowered to concentrate on the full mouth before he raised his eyes again to stare into Justin's, silently seeking acceptance of what he was about to do and finding to his elation that there was no apparent resistance being given. "I think I could use some more CPR training from my expert anyway."

 

Justin's breath hitched as he realized what Brian was about to do; he could feel his back pressed up against the arm of the couch and he knew he couldn't escape even if he wanted to, and frankly, that was the last thing he wanted to do, despite his earlier attempt to leave. "Brian…." He whispered out, noticing the other man's lips twitch slightly in response to the use of his name. He didn't even know what he was about to say, but it didn't matter; any coherent thought promptly went out the window as Brian's hands moved upward to grasp him firmly on both shoulders and the brunet slowly moved in to touch his lips with his, Justin's eyes fluttering closed to relish the moment. It was nothing like the earlier kiss in the kitchen, where it had been primal and needy; this one was almost gentle, tentative, providing just the hint of more to come. It wasn't passionate – even though he suspected that soon it _would_ be – but in a way it was even more revealing to him in its almost reverent, tender touch. It spoke volumes to him regarding Brian's feelings and was a balm to his fragile, vulnerable heart and soul as his lips instinctively parted in silent invitation for more.

 

He gasped softly as Brian pushed his tongue in to savor the sweetness hidden there; the brunet's arms wound themselves around Justin's body again, one coming to rest on his upper back while the other crept lower toward the waistband of his pants as it snaked inside his shirt.

 

Justin felt himself go dizzy with desire as he reached up to grasp Brian's shirt and clung onto the fabric for dear life as Brian's tongue deftly snaked in between his lips to begin a leisurely, sensual assault of his mouth; he groaned as he felt the warmth of Brian's hand deftly sneak inside the back of his pants and cup one of his ass cheeks to push their bodies even closer together. Before he knew it, he was pushed back even more firmly onto the arm of the couch and pinned possessively in place; he could feel the hard surface poking into the middle of his back as Brian continued his own personal 'persuasion campaign' to get him to change his mind, one hand on his ass and the other one sliding inside the unbuttoned part of his shirt to glide across the V of his exposed neck.

 

He gasped again into Brian's mouth as he felt the other man's long index finger brazenly moving up and down teasingly along the crease between his ass cheeks; he knew somehow it would be just a matter of time before that talented, probing finger found its way into his hole, but he had vastly underestimated Brian's alacrity. He bucked off the arm of the couch as he immediately felt the bold intrusion. "Fuck!" he cried out in exquisite torture as they finally broke off their kiss and he had a chance to try and regain some breath.

 

Brian chuckled softly at his reaction, feeling heady from the encouraging response he was getting. "That's coming," he told his companion huskily. Justin's face was flushed and sweaty just from the tone of Brian's voice and their kiss, the blond's lips thoroughly ravaged and plundered; the brunet thought he was the most intoxicating creature he had ever seen. "Changed your mind yet?" he huskily intoned, curling his lips under in amusement. He pressed his finger further inside Justin's puckered opening a bit more and waggled it slightly as the blond's hands clenched into tight fists of helplessness.

 

At that moment, Justin realized the few men he had been with before had merely been boys; this was a master playing him at his best and he knew he was going to be hard prone to resist both him and his 'offers.'

 

Emboldened, Brian began to brush his lips across Justin's cheek and then plastered them onto the side of his neck, his tongue coming out to lick a trail from the creamy flesh up to the lower lobe of his ear before he whispered, "It's getting fucking hot in here, don't you think?" he said, his warm breath washing over Justin and igniting a flame inside him. He couldn't resist nipping at the soft skin, feeling Justin's heart beating rapidly under his body as he added, "And I think we're both way overdressed. They always say you feel more comfortable in business meetings if you can imagine your audience naked."

 

"I…..I don't think that's quite right," Justin managed to stammer, unable to think about just what was wrong with that statement, though, because at the moment his thoughts were an incoherent jumble as Brian relentlessly continued to forge onward in one of his most important promotional campaigns – his pitch to get this man under his professional wing and into his bed.

 

He laughed at Justin's befuddled response as he whispered, "Well, let's just test that theory, shall we?" He continued to probe inside Justin's hole, this time pushing a second finger inside, glad he was effectively holding the blond's body down with his own so he couldn't throw him off the couch; the way his smaller body was arching in response to his touch, he had no doubt that Justin would do just that if he had the opportunity, but he wasn't going to give it to him. He began to adroitly unbutton the silky, blue shirt that made Justin's skin almost glow in the soft lighting, wanting to see more of what lay underneath, _much_ more. "I need every advantage I can get to make you change your mind."

 

Justin's heart was pounding furiously as he felt Brian's fingers lightly skimming over his skin, amazed that the man could unbutton his shirt one-handed; to his consternation, Brian continued to sensually attack him front and back, his other hand continuing to scissor a couple fingers inside him in preparation for what he was beginning to think would be inevitable, despite his earlier declaration that he was leaving. And even though he hadn't been prepared for Brian's action, after the initial hiss of sharp pain the brunet's exploration of his body was metamorphosing into a heightened sense of distinctive pleasure as he struggled to maintain some sense of coherency.

 

"B…..Brian," Justin panted out as the brunet finished unbuttoning his shirt and the two sides flopped open on either side of his body, exposing his chest and belly to the cool loft air and Brian's appreciative, lust-filled gaze. He could swear his heart was exposed along with the rest of his body as he watched Brian's eyes darken as they slowly raked over his torso. He had to make one more attempt to ease the worries still invading his heart as he moved his hands to curve around either side of Brian's face. The hazel eyes bored into his as he whispered, "Brian…..before we…..before this goes any farther….."

 

"You still haven't changed your mind," Brian supplied for him; he was confused, though, when Justin shook his head. "Then what?" he asked softly, stilling his hand on Justin's chest; he slowly removed his fingers from their exploratory mission of Justin's ass to cup one of the soft globes instead, hearing his companion's groan of loss as he stared into the blond's intense blue eyes. "I know you want me, Justin, and God, you know I do, too. We're two, red-blooded, healthy and horny queers. So what is it?"

 

"Brian," Justin began again, his hands relishing the feel of Brian's warm, slightly-stubbled flesh beneath his touch as he slowly rubbed his thumb across his cheek. "You're right…..I still haven't changed my mind; not about that. But if….if we do this, there's no going back for me," he warned him, his emotion-filled voice barely above a whisper. "This is my heart on the line," he confessed almost in embarrassment, praying that Brian would understand what this meant to him, and hoping fervently that Brian felt the same way. He bit his lip nervously as he stared into the hazel eyes that were darkened with desire for him.

 

To Brian's credit, he didn't respond to Justin with amused flippancy or disdain, but rather astonishing candor, especially for him. "I know," he answered softly, his breathing heavy and labored as he tried to slow his own heartbeat down; Justin wasn't the _only_ one that was being deeply affected by what they were doing. "That's how you are," he murmured as his hand slid up to stroke Justin's face tenderly. "I wouldn't have you any other way," he said, unable to keep from smiling just a bit at the double meaning.

 

"Brian…." His companion answered in frustration, still not quite ready to accept what he was saying at face value.

 

Brian stared into the insecure eyes; after all this time, how could Justin not realize that it wasn't just his own heart at stake here? "It's my heart on the line, too," Brian finally confessed, amazed that the world didn't come crashing down upon him after making that heartfelt statement; rather, he found himself smiling back in relief at the glowing face staring up at him in astonished delight. "I mean it, Justin," he whispered, his eyes boring into his companion's. He sighed. "In fact, if you really need me to prove it to you," he continued, wondering if he had lost his mind now, "As much as it fucking kills me to even think about it because God knows I'm horny as hell for you, I'll let you up right now and let you walk out this door tonight; I'll wait if that's what you really need." He slowly stroked his thumb across the soft, downy skin of Justin's cheek as he noticed the blond's eyes widening in shock as well as stunned surprise at his declaration. "It's your call." He didn't dare tell this man exactly how much power he had over him, how he had never in his wildest dreams thought he would ever make this offer to anyone; he realized how deeply affected he was by this man and the lengths he would go to just to be with him, but he wasn't quite ready to verbalize that yet – he only wished fervently that Justin could ascertain that fact without him having to say it out loud. As he looked at Justin's face, he was glad to see that he did know...

 

Justin's heart stopped in his throat; he finally had no doubt that Brian's motives weren't just fleeting and hedonistic in nature; this powerful, sexy, glorious man cared about him, much more than just for a one-night pleasure. As Brian looked at him with anxious expectation, waiting for him to make up his mind, he knew there could only be one response he could give him. He placed his fingers on Brian's cranberry-colored lips and swept them across his mouth slowly, almost reverently, as he shook his head, causing the brunet to misread his reaction and groan in frustrated disappointment.

 

Brian was prepared to make good on his promise to release Justin from his embrace, as much as he hated like hell to do it; his pulse sped up in exultation, however, as Justin whispered shyly, "I'm not going anywhere…..except to your bed."

Smiling, Brian leaned down to capture Justin's lips for a brief but passionate kiss as he removed his hand from around Justin's ass. He gently swung Justin's legs around toward the floor as he rose up from the couch, his eyes dark with desire for this beautiful man as his heart thudded in his chest over the knowledge that the two of them were finally going to make love. He reached his hand down to his companion; the pale, slender fingers were placed in his hand trustingly as he whispered simply to Justin, "Come with me, then, and let me _show_ you what you mean to me."

He easily pulled Justin to his feet, their fingers linking together as he pulled him against his body to give him another kiss. "You're so beautiful," escaped his lips almost involuntarily as they pulled apart and he saw the same desire in his eyes reflected back at him. He reached up with his one hand to push the royal blue fabric off one pale shoulder and then the other, Justin breaking their hand hold long enough to allow the soft, filmy fabric to float slowly down to the floor. Brian reached over in hopes of unbuttoning the lone button of Justin's fly, desiring to see all of the glorious body he was about to explore thoroughly, but he was stymied by Justin's hand reaching over to grab his. Brian's eyes lifted to meet his questioningly as Justin whispered shyly, barely able to control his own anticipation, "Your turn now."

Brian smiled slightly in understanding as he watched Justin reach over with somewhat shaky hands to begin unbuttoning the rest of his shirt. It was all he could do not to touch the slender body as he waited impatiently for his lover to finish his task; his heart thumped in his chest each time Justin's fingers brushed against his skin and he was amazed at his reaction to such a minor touch. He watched, entranced, as Justin's tongue slid out just slightly in concentration as he worked, finally succeeding in opening Brian's shirt. The blond's hands trembled just a bit as he grasped each side of the shimmery maroon fabric and slowly opened it, taking a moment to admire the exposed, smooth, bronzed flesh; the brunet accommodatingly dropped his hands down to his sides to help Justin slide the shirt off his shoulders as it, too, dropped to the ground slowly to join the other previously-discarded piece of clothing.

They stood there for a moment, both understanding that they were about to take a step into uncharted, new territory; a step that would be irreversible for both of them. Brian held out his hand silently in invitation; there was a slight pause as Justin weighed the significance of what he was about to do before he firmly placed his smaller hand in Brian's. Facing each other, the brunet nodded as he began to pull Justin toward the elevated bedroom space, their dinner still warming in the oven but now long forgotten in light of a more urgent appetite. In the heat of the moment he forgot how far it was to the bedroom, finding himself tripping slightly as he got to the raised step and bumping up against it; he heard Justin giggle softly in response, breaking the somewhat tense moment as he smiled back at him in self-deprecation.

"Someone must have moved it," Justin suggested teasingly, his eyes twinkling as Brian grinned and pulled him flush against his body. He held onto Justin's hand as he reached out to grasp the soft hair behind the blond's neck and lean down to kiss the soft lips once more. The two kissed for several seconds, their tongues swabbing the insides of each other's mouths thoroughly as two twin heartbeats beat as one in eagerness.

 

They eventually pulled back, reluctant to break off their kiss but cognizant of other pleasurable things to come. Brian's right hand slowly trailed lightly down Justin's stomach, watching in fascination as the muscles rippled underneath his touch, before he stopped at the waistband of Justin's jeans. As their gazes locked together, Brian whispered huskily, "I've been waiting a long time for this." He stared into Justin's eyes, so blue and intense, before his hand pulled at the single, round silver-colored tab and he pulled it free. Never taking his eyes off the flushed face of his lover, he slowly slid the zipper down, his breath catching in his throat as he was finally able to slide his hand inside the front of Justin's pants and curl his hand around a surprisingly thick, silky-smooth cock. Justin's head leaned back in ecstasy and he groaned in response as he felt Brian's warm hand slowly slide experimentally up and down his shaft, finally coming to rest near the end as he flicked his thumb expertly over the tip.

 

Justin moaned audibly as he jumped at the unexpected jolt of heat that ran through his body just at that simple gesture. Brian licked his lips hungrily like some sleek, sexy cat as he placed both hands at Justin's waist and gave the rest of his clothing a firm tug downward, staring with unabashed lust as he admired the slender, perfectly-proportioned body from the pale, slender torso down to the triangular nest of golden curls leading to his lover's dark-pink cock, hard and erect from his touch; the tip was beginning to ooze the telltale signs of desire for him and he could feel his own body desperately craving release in return. "So fucking hot," he stated unequivocally as Justin's face blushed a dark shade of pink at his appraisal. He slowly lowered himself to his knees to push the rest of the blond's clothing down further, pulling at Justin's shoes and socks to remove them so he could dispense with the rest of his apparel.

 

"God!" Justin cried out suddenly; he twisted his hands in the top of the brunet's hair as Brian placed his fingers around his thighs to brace himself and began to lick a wet path with his tongue from the tip of Justin's cock to the base; he couldn't help stealing a preamble taste of what was to come while he was conveniently positioned in just the right spot. He was dutifully rewarded with a salty/sweet taste of pure ambrosia leaking from Justin's cock and his body threatened to come right then and there just from the touch, sounds, and tastes he was experiencing with this man.

 

He slowly rose to his feet, his hands trailing up Justin's sides lightly as he stood before he decided he couldn't wait any longer; leaning down to quickly pull his shoes and socks off, he tugged his jeans down his long legs as he noticed Justin's eyes widen in shocked admiration. He had gone commando earlier, secretly hoping that he and Justin would arrive at just this moment in time and not wanting to waste any moment of them being together, and he smiled secretly as he observed the effect he was having on his lover; it was no doubt the same, intense feelings he was experiencing as well. Stepping out of his jeans, the two men were finally totally naked now with both showing obvious signs of impatience to move on with their lovemaking.

 

Brian sucked in his breath at the magnificent sight before him; this man had to be the perfect match for him in every way – physically, emotionally, as well as intellectually. He couldn't wait to find out how they fit together in bed, too. He took Justin's hand and led him the few steps over to the king-sized piece of furniture, turning Justin so his back was to the mattress. He smiled at him reassuringly as he gently pushed on his shoulders to sit him down on the edge, staring at his slender body appreciatively. He nudged his chin upward in mute request for Justin to scoot upward onto the bed, relieved when his companion understood and did as he was asked.

 

He knelt at the edge of the bed, admiring the way Justin's pale skin complimented the navy-blue color of his bedding; the contrast of light and dark was sexy as hell. He took a moment further to gaze into the nervous but lust-filled eyes of his lover as he began to crawl up between Justin's legs; the blond instinctively opened them wider to accommodate him as Brian slowly advanced, taking a moment to admire the other man's thick, now purplish cock, so enticing and so delicious-looking – just like an expensive, extravagant gourmet meal that you wanted to feast on, time and time again.

 

Justin breathing hitched in anticipation, but he still wasn't prepared for his body's reaction as he watched Brian's lips descend onto his cock and form a tight suction around him; he bucked off the bed, at least as much as he could with Brian pinning him down, as he felt the man's hot, wet tongue come out to swipe the underside of his shaft shortly afterward. "Fuck!" he hissed at the unexpected action and curled his hands into the soft, luxurious duvet lying underneath him.

 

Brian gave the tasty shaft one more lick before he removed his lips from Justin's cock, wanting their first time when they came together to be with him firmly entrenched inside his ass. "I thought you'd never ask," he teased huskily as he slowly slid up Justin's body, their rock-hard cocks brushing together; he was embarrassed to realize he was in danger of coming right then and there just from his body's reaction to his lover as Justin gasped at the sensation. He felt the blond's hands fisting in the hair on his head and then reaching to firmly curve around his shoulders as he crept upward, further and further until they were nose to nose, their faces sweaty already from anticipation and need. "I hope you're not hungry for dinner now," Brian breathed out, amazed at how large and beautiful Justin's pupils were, dilated with lust and desire – desire for _him_. "Because I'm not letting you out of this bed until daybreak," he warned huskily. He watched Justin's Adam's apple bob up and down as his lover swallowed a nervous breath and the waves of lust began anew as he thought once more of that throat swallowing his seed. He would be sure to check out his theory of how that felt before this night was over, but for now he had something much more interactive and _in-depth_ in mind….

 

Justin shook his head silently in reply, unable at the moment to actually say anything out loud. His dreams of what it would feel like to be in bed with this man had been vastly underrated. He had always thought he knew what it felt like to be with another man – the emotions and physical reactions – but he was quickly realizing he had been vastly mistaken. The few other experiences he had had prior to this were a mere prelude to the real thing, and he and Brian hadn't even progressed very far yet. If he felt _this_ way just from Brian's kissing, fondling, and licking him, along with the seductive tone of his voice, he could only imagine what it was going to feel like to surrender to him completely. His body was already thrumming with so much pleasure, he wasn't even sure he could last until the best part arrived. He was young and had a lot of stamina, but something told him even _his_ body's limits were about to be tested to the ultimate degree tonight by this particular lover….

 

"I AM hungry," Justin maintained, as Brian arched his eyebrows in question; he was concerned just for a few seconds until Justin added softly in clarification, "for _you_."

 

Brian's mouth curled upward on one side as he growled, "So am I – and I think it might be the insatiable kind." In fact, he was sure of it – when it came to Justin, he strongly suspected he would never get enough of this man….

 

Supporting his toned upper body by his arms, he swooped in for a toe-curling kiss, forcefully pushing his tongue inside for supremacy. Justin sighed as he closed his eyes and gave into the wondrous sensations flowing through his body; as Brian lapped at his mouth like some sensual, sleek cat, their bodies rubbing together was making his cock even harder and his restraint more and more tenuous. "Brian," he whispered urgently as the brunet finally withdrew to stare into his eyes; he could feel the brunet's need for him, throbbing and pulsating between them and his body felt like it was on fire. "I need you," he whispered adamantly. "Fuck me; _love_ me."

 

Brian lips twitched a little uneasily at the sentimental term, but he didn't find himself denying that was what it was; he was more than happy to oblige Justin by fucking the daylights out of him all night long, but he also knew it wasn't just the mechanical act of coupling – it _was_ making love with him. _Only_ with him….

 

He rolled off Justin just long enough to reach over to the night table to retrieve a condom and a small tube of lubricant; as he held it up between them, their eyes made contact and they both knew the significance of what they were about to do. There would be no turning back for either of them…..

 

"Put it on me," Brian urged eagerly as he ripped the package open and handed the small latex disc to his lover. Justin swallowed a nervous lump in his throat as he reached down and rolled the condom onto the impressively-sized cock, his heart skipping a beat as his fingers pulled the barrier over the hot, silky skin. As he finished his task and raised his eyes to meet the hazel ones, he nodded slightly, telling Brian all he needed to hear without uttering a sound.

 

Brian flipped the lubricant's top open, quickly squirting some on his long fingers and reaching over to spread it copiously over and around Justin's hole as the blond shivered at the initial, cold contact. He cleaned the residual off his fingers by rubbing it on his sheathed cock before twisting his body to lie once more on top of his lover; the blond pulled his legs farther apart to accommodate his length and he felt Justin trembling in anticipation beneath him as he murmured, "Ready?"

 

Justin nodded silently, his eyes fixed on his lover's as he slowly raised his legs toward Brian's waist and linked them behind his chiseled back in nervous preparation. He knew Brian cared about him and would be careful, but now that the moment was at hand, his adrenalin had shot up dramatically. This was it – this was what he had been hoping for and dreaming of for so long now…

 

Brian gently swept a lock of hair from Justin's sweaty brow before he leaned in to soundly kiss the full, pink lips, still swollen from their kissing rounds earlier. He gazed into the deep blue eyes, marveling at how their color seemed to change with each new emotion Justin was feeling, before he lined himself up with Justin's puckered hole and slightly pushed in, hearing his lover's hiss of pain at the initial intrusion. He grasped Justin's upper arms, trying furiously not to squeeze the tender flesh too hard, as he waited for Justin to adjust to his girth. He was rewarded after a few seconds with a simple word of encouragement: "More," and he pressed farther in, finding it hard not to push in entirely to fully feel the unbelievably-tight channel welcoming his pulsing, throbbing, painfully-hard cock. To his amazement, Justin was tighter than the greenest virgin; he knew somehow that this beautiful man must have had lovers in the past, so he was thrilled by the almost impossibly-constrictive path he was discovering. He could feel every ridge, every muscle, every slight movement of Justin's hips and ass as he slid in even farther and Justin's body arched off the body in perfect, synchronous greeting.

 

"Fuck, Justin," Brian grunted out as he pulled back, only to ram back in with another grunt of euphoric pleasure. "So tight…..so perfect," he murmured as he picked up their pace, finding to his admiration that Justin was more than capable of keeping up with him; the blond took hold of Brian's biceps and held on for dear life as they rocked together, back and forth, Justin's slim hips pushing up as Brian slightly pulled back out, only to thrust his cock in even harder.

 

Justin moaned loudly and twisted his head from side to side in almost unbearable pleasure as Brian expertly hit his sweet spot over and over again. "God!" he cried out. "Brian….I…..I can't last…"

 

Brian's eyes shone with a feral gleam as he continued to ram into his lover over and over again; his skin was slick and sweaty from their exertion and he could feel his body quickly tightening with the telltale signs of imminent climax. His limber lover was almost folded in half as he pushed in to claim the swollen lips for a passionate kiss before he pulled back enough to grasp Justin's cock and begin pumping it in time with their thrusts, wanting his young lover to experience even half of the pleasure he was providing for him. "Come with me," he urged as he felt himself about to lose control.

 

As if it had been officially choreographed, he cried out in indescribable pleasure as he came, hearing Justin groan loudly as he, too, shot milky, sticky come all over both their bellies and chests almost simultaneously.

 

A few seconds later, Justin dropped his legs to either side of his lover; they felt like they were made of rubbery lead as Brian collapsed, heavy and sated, on top of him. His body was in a heady, languorous state but his lungs were breathing frantically and he felt like his heart was about to burst from his chest. He could feel Brian's heart beating just as rapidly against his body, the culmination of their passion lying smeared between them.

 

Brian went to move off his lighter lover as Justin whispered unexpectedly, "Stay….."

 

"I'll crush you," Brian murmured in reply, his arms wrapped around the slick, slim, frame. He knew he should follow through with his intentions, but he was feeling quite reluctant to separate from this beautiful man just yet; Justin's quickly-drying come was making his skin itchy, but the warmth and softness he felt lying beneath him was heavenly and Justin's plaintive entreaty was hard to deny.

 

After a while, though, his felt his cock softening and, as Justin sighed in disappointed understanding, he slowly pulled out of the smaller body and disposed of the condom in a nearby trash can by the side of the bed.

 

"Where are you going?" Justin asked in concern; he raised himself up on his elbows as Brian twisted around to sit up on the bed and slowly rise to stand on his feet.

 

He looked down at the tousled-haired, thoroughly-fucked body of his lover and smiled in reassurance. "Just going to bathroom, don't worry," he replied softy. "I'll be right back." He gazed into the beautiful face of his lover – God, what a wonderful word that was now! – and told him huskily, "Don't worry – we're just getting started."

 

Justin blushed despite their just-completed union as he admired Brian's taut ass retreating into the bathroom. He plopped back down to lie on the bed and sighed in contentment, wondering now why he had been so hesitant to make love with him; now that they had finally been together, it had been magical, mind-blowing and toe-curling all rolled into one. And despite their passion that had eventually overtaken them, Brian's gentle touches and the look of tenderness in his eyes had been the best aphrodisiac of all.

 

He watched now as Brian returned with a wet washcloth and, kneeling next to him on the bed, he lightly washed his pale chest and belly, causing him to shiver and moan softly in reaction as the brunet reached down to hold Justin's cock with one hand and wash his body with the other.

 

The similarity between Brian's gentle ministration toward his lover and Justin's treatment of his son wasn't lost on the older man. "You know the first time I started falling for you?" he whispered as he continued, not quite realizing how much he was giving away in that statement; Justin's eyes widened slightly at his confession, but he smartly chose not to call him out on it, afraid that Brian would clam up once he realized what he had said – he was enjoying his lover's almost reverent cleansing of his skin and his soft words of endearment too much to risk spoiling it. He held his breath hoping Brian wouldn't realize what he had said as he watched him rubbing lightly around his belly button. His stomach rippled at the ticklish touch as Brian continued to speak while he concentrated on his task.

 

"It was when you took so much care giving Gus that sponge bath," he told his lover, whose eyes misted over in recollection. "You were so gentle and compassionate with him." His hand pushed the washcloth higher, toward Justin's breastbone, as he added softly, "That was when I knew you were someone special."

 

Justin's eyes teared up even more as he bit his lip, trying hard not to make any sound to interrupt this amazing declaration; his heart was soaring over Brian's words and his tone of voice, so soothing and yes, _loving_.

 

"And that drawing of the two of us together," the brunet added as he lightly scrubbed around Justin's left nipple. "No one had ever been able to capture how we feel toward each other when we're together." He took a swipe around Justin's other nipple before finally taking the soiled washcloth and dropping it into the wastebasket next to the bed for retrieval later, not wanting to leave this man's side again. "…..Until now." He stared now into Justin's intense blue eyes, wanting to lose himself in those wondrous pools. "I…..I'm very glad you came into my life, Justin Taylor."

 

Justin sniffled now, unable to hold back his emotions; it was all too much. He whispered back, "So am I," as Brian leaned over and gave him a tender kiss before he gently pushed Justin to lie on his side and to the blond's amazement, spooned up against him, wrapping his arm around his waist from behind.

 

He felt Brian nip his earlobe playfully as he whispered teasingly, "So how do you like my bedside manner?"

 

Justin smiled as he snuggled back into the warm body. "It's impeccable, Doctor," he whispered as his eyes slowly fluttered closed in Utopian bliss; he couldn't think of a more perfect place he would rather be at that moment than lying here in this man's arms.

 

Brian huffed out a smile of his own as he heard Justin's breathing evening out, signaling his tired lover was slipping into dreamland. "Get some rest, Florence," he whispered. "We're just getting started." He pulled Justin tighter into his arms as he, too, drifted off into slumber, knowing when he woke up his lover would still be right where he wanted him to be.


	15. A New Opportunity?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys continue their exploration of their deepening relationship, while Justin receives some support from his allies...

_Next Morning – 8:10 a.m. – Children’s Hospital_

 

Dr. Martin McKenzie sighed as he listened to voice mail message No. 15 on his phone; all together there had been 22 such messages since he had chosen to issue the suspension to Justin Taylor and that didn’t even take into account the multitude of nasty email messages he had received through the hospital’s website.  All of them contained the same basic message:  somehow word had gotten out, despite their privacy policy, that he had disciplined the young intern for his dalliance with another man and they were all outraged over the severity of his punishment. 

 

Most of the voice mail messages were from angry parents of either current or former patients of the hospital, upset that he had suspended a man who they feel had been instrumental in keeping their children’s spirits up during what was the worst time of their – and their parents’ – lives.  They left no doubt as to their dislike and vehement disagreement over his decision.  How they knew this had happened in the first place was unknown; but knowing how fast the gossip pool grew around the hospital, he had a feeling someone had leaked the information deliberately.  In fact, by the speed at which the messages had begun to appear so soon after Taylor’s suspension had begun, it threatened to set a new distribution record. 

 

The emails were even _more_ eye-opening, however.  Not only were there ones from employees who worked directly with Justin, describing in meticulous detail how Taylor was unique in his ability to put both patients and parents at ease over their child’s condition and perhaps even speed up their recovery in some cases, but there were several emails from actual parents as well.  Some of those emails were both heartwarming as well as gut-wrenching.  They told of how Justin had spent untold, unpaid, off-shift hours staying by the bedsides of critically-ill children, boosting the spirits of both the child as well as the parents themselves, and of his gentleness and compassion with them. They reiterated how he had gone out of his way to deliver special treats to them or little stuffed animals to help comfort them and lessen their pain.  It even described how he had drawn candid portraits of each child who had passed away and had presented them as gifts to the grieving parents, always showing the child as vibrant, happy, and full of life, just the way their parents wanted to remember them. 

 

Several of the parents had told him how that portrait had made their loss much easier to bear and how much it had meant to them to be able to gaze at their child’s image in the bloom of life, rather than picturing them emaciated and pain-stricken.  Some had even sent photos of the portraits to prove their point, and McKenzie was astounded at the realism and energy portrayed in the drawings.  He had had no idea that Taylor was so artistically gifted; to him he had merely been one of dozens of orderlies who came and went from the hospital after growing tired of what most of them viewed as an unglamorous, unheralded, and unappreciated job.  It seemed that one particular orderly, however, had changed the scope of that image forever in the hearts and minds of several parents and their vulnerable patients.

 

One particular email he had received was of special concern to him; it was from a name he immediately recognized:  Daniel Barton, the owner of Barton’s Fine Foods.  Barton owned several groceries throughout the State of Pennsylvania and the Upper Midwest, and had a child, Maria, who had been born with a heart defect that was now 10 years old.   Fortunately, due to a radical new heart procedure that had been performed recently, his child now appeared to be well on her way to a full recovery.  He had been so grateful for the care Maria had received at the hospital that just last week he had pledged a four-million-dollar donation for a new cardiac wing the hospital desperately wanted to add to the southern end of the building to help bring in more lucrative business. 

 

Apparently, Justin Taylor had been his daughter’s orderly, and Barton had discovered the suspension that had been handed out to him; to say the man was not happy was an understatement.  He had lashed out at the hospital in his email, advising McKenzie that if something wasn’t done to rectify Taylor’s predicament, he was actually going to _pull_ his sponsorship of the cardiac wing!  The doctor’s mouth had fallen open in shock at the man’s adamant threat; he couldn’t believe the man was so struck by the care that one orderly had provided to his daughter that he would actually withdraw his pledge to help fund the new wing.  If he followed through on his promise, though, that would totally decimate their fundraising efforts; the ability to promote their new development and gain further backing was totally dependent upon Barton’s endorsement and ongoing support, and if it was yanked out from under them they would have to start all over again.

 

As he jotted down the latest name and other information from the most recent voicemail message, he placed the receiver back down worriedly.  This was not good, Swanson the Miracle Worker or not.  Was it worth all the bad publicity that was being generated merely to stroke the ego of their chief surgeon?  More importantly, was it worth the possible cost of having their multi-million funding _pulled_?  He brushed some hair back from his forehead, feeling an imminent headache quickly encroaching as he noticed Kelly, his assistant, approaching his office.  He looked up and sighed, wishing he had decided to work from home today.  “Yes, Kelly?  What is it?”

 

He noticed his assistant fidgeting uncomfortably as she replied, “There’s a couple of employees here that want to speak with you, Doctor.”

 

“About….?”

 

Kelly hesitated.  “They wouldn’t say,” she admitted.  “And they don’t have an appointment.”

 

“Then tell them to _make_ one and come back when it’s scheduled,” he told her brusquely; he didn’t mean to be rude with his assistant, but he was getting tired of these constant intrusions into his normal workday.  He had always prided himself on his organizational skills – in fact, his ability to multi-task as well as maintain his duties in a well-organized and structured manner had been one of the reasons why he had been hired in the first place – but the past few days since he had temporarily suspended Taylor had completely thrown his normal efficiency out the window.  He didn’t like being either pushed off schedule or blindsided by impromptu visits from hospital staff, and something told him this was about to be yet another one of them…... 

 

He stared pointedly at his assistant as she nodded silently and turned to leave.  He let out a heavy whoosh of relief as he heard his assistant speaking softly to whoever his visitors were and he flipped open his laptop to review his appointment calendar for the day.  A few seconds later, though, he sighed in irritated defeat as he heard voices just outside his door, increasing in volume and coming closer.  “I said you can’t just go in there,” Kelly was saying.  “I’ll be happy to make an appointment for you….”

 

He could hear an unidentified female voice retorting, “I don’t _want_ a fucking appointment!” as he turned his gaze toward the doorway just in time to see a feisty-looking, petite, brunette woman and a older companion wearing nurse’s scrubs entering his office with his assistant close on their heels.

 

“I told them they couldn’t see you without an appointment,” she told her boss, flustered that this had happened twice in a week now.

 

Feeling like he was participating in a Twilight Zone and experiencing a distinct feeling of déjà vu, McKenzie shook his head.  “Never mind,” he wearily told Kelly.  “I’ll handle this.”  His assistant murmured a regretful apology for her inability to carry through with his orders before she nodded and quietly left the room, pausing just long enough to turn and glare at their unwelcome, impromptu visitors before she softly closed the door behind her.

 

“Have a seat, ladies,” he told them, sweeping his hand out to indicate the two chairs in front of him.  “Apparently whatever you have to say can’t wait to go through proper channels.”  He studied the two women closely from over the wire rim of his glasses; he thought both looked familiar, but frankly to his own embarrassment, there were several hundred employees of the hospital working three different shifts and he just didn’t have the proper time to get to know each one closely.  He actually regretted that, feeling to properly run the hospital he should know more about the employees that comprise his staff, but having only been in his position for a relatively short time he had yet to make that wish a reality.  If he had, perhaps he would have known more about the young man who he suspected was about to be the subject of their present conversation.  “So what do you so adamantly need to discuss with me, uh, Ms…?” 

 

“Chanders……..Daphne Chanders,” the brunette told him as he noticed her name badge indicating she was a resident.  “And this is one of the nurses from ICU, Cathy McDonald.” 

 

McKenzie nodded, noticing for the first time that the young resident had a clipboard in her hand.  “Dr. Chanders,” he acknowledged her politely as he looked at her much older companion.  “Ms. McDonald.”  He pushed his glasses back up onto his nose before advising them, “I have a very busy schedule today, ladies, so if you could please get to the point.”  Not for the first time, he wondered why he even tried to adhere to a strict schedule; recently, it didn’t seem to be doing him much good.  He watched as Dr. Chanders turned the clipboard she was holding around and held it out toward him.  As he accepted it and began to review it, he discovered his previous suspicion was correct – he was about to have yet another conversation regarding Justin Taylor.  The clipboard was full of names.  “What’s this?”

 

“It’s a petition registering our disapproval of your disciplinary action regarding Justin Taylor,” Daphne told him, her eyes flashing in righteous indignation.  She had stewed for four days now, trying hard to abide by Justin’s wishes not to do anything that might negatively reflect upon her residency, before she just couldn’t stand it any longer.  She still had no idea how everyone in the hospital found out about Justin’s punishment – despite what McKenzie no doubt thought was her doing, she hadn’t been the one to spread the news internally – but she wasn’t surprised that everyone she spoke to about it was quite angry over the severity of his punishment.  They all agreed that perhaps Justin had exercised poor judgement in engaging in such conduct out in the open, however unintentionally, but they also thought the decision that had been made had been far too heavy handed.  The details had spread more rapidly than a wildfire, and had eventually been overheard by some of the parents standing vigil over their chronically ill children, the ones who had benefitted from Justin’s compassionate, loving treatment of them, and they, too, had felt a strong need to participate in the petition drive by affixing their names as well.

 

Cathy McDonald had been one of the most vocal critics of Justin’s treatment and had taken it upon herself to begin circulating a petition to have Justin reinstated immediately.  She knew, just like the other employees, that they could possibly risk some sort of sanction themselves due to their participation, but they all figured two things:  there was safety in numbers (after all, the hospital couldn’t afford to lose ALL of them), and they had to stand up for what they believed in, no matter _what_ the cost.  Daphne had found their response both heartwarming as well as encouraging, choosing to accompany Cathy up to the Chief of Staff’s office to plead their case and hopefully push to get Justin back on the job that he loved so much and excelled at – and have him return to where the children so desperately needed him.  She had chosen not to tell Justin yet about what was going on – if they weren’t successful, he would be none the wiser, but if he knew they had gone to so much trouble on his account, she also knew he would be worried about their welfare and be embarrassed that they had possibly risked their own jobs for him.  

 

Dr. McKenzie slowly studied the names on the petition; there were not only names of employees listed by floor and occupation (noting there were several doctors listed in addition to various other personnel), but also pages and pages of parents of current as well as former patients, just like with the numerous messages he had received over the past few days.  The disapproval over his handling of Justin Taylor’s case had apparently snowballed furiously since the discipline had been handed out, and he was savvy enough to know that this was bad – extremely bad.  The hospital’s reputation had been built on goodwill, high-quality care and positive media exposure – if word got out about what had happened and the hospital’s reputation was sullied, all the good he had worked so feverishly to build since he had started here would be for naught.  In light of the economic environment in which they currently lived, they could not afford to have that happen.  “There’re a lot of names on here,” he commented at last, although that was self-apparent without him having to voice it aloud. 

 

“Yes, there are,” Cathy told him as Daphne nodded.  “A lot of people aren’t happy with what happened to Justin, not only his co-workers but a lot of the parents, too.”  As McKenzie looked at her, she added astutely, “I’ve worked here a long time, Doctor.  I’ve seen a lot of Chiefs of Staff come and go.  But one thing has always remained the same – our focus on providing quality, compassionate care for our patients.  To me, depriving the children of Justin’s talents over some minor infraction of the ‘rules’ is a major hindrance to maintaining that goal.”

 

McKenzie scoffed softly.  “He’s just one orderly, Ms. McDonald.  How much impact can one man – especially in that capacity – have?”

 

Cathy’s eyes flashed with anger; she held up her hand in front of Daphne in an unspoken request for her to be silent as she continued, “You don’t have a good comprehension of what that ‘orderly’ does, _Doctor_ ,” the disdain obvious in her voice.  “He’s not just an ‘orderly.’  He is an extremely talented artist who uses his gifts to help make the children feel better, if only for a short time.  I’ve seen him work his magic on them, Doctor.  He doesn’t just give them sponge baths, bring their meals, and change the bedding.  He sits with them, holds their hand when they have diseases that others would run away from.  He brings them ice cream to not only sooth their throats but their souls.  He takes a bag full of small stuffed animals with him wherever he goes to leave them with a small toy that will provide them comfort when they’re scared, lonely, or missing their pet at home.   He sits with them and draws pictures for them, silly ones that make them smile, or he turns them into some colorful, wild animal by painting their faces for them in the rec room.  He doesn’t treat any of the children differently, no matter how hideously they may be burned or disfigured; trust me, I’ve seen many other orderlies that have done just that.   I’m not quite sure what it is about him, but he’s special – very special, and we can’t afford to lose him.”

 

Daphne’s eyes filled with tears; Cathy was right – Justin was all of those things – and more.  “She’s right,” she said in a firm voice, unable to keep quiet any longer.  “I’ve watched him, Doctor.  He’s an amazing artist and uses that skill, along with his compassion, to create miracles.  He gives the children as well as their parents hope.  He never complains about what’s asked of him and goes out of his way to take care of them.  He even helped one of the parents find a spare room so they could get cleaned up and get some rest while his child was battling for his life.”  She didn’t mention that the ‘parent’ happened to be the ‘other’ participant in Justin’s two trysts, not wanting to muddy the waters, but really it didn’t matter; it was the truth.  “I think when you consider everything he has to offer the hospital, Doctor, his contributions and qualities far outweigh the minor infraction he committed.  And he’s already been suspended for four days without pay.  Justin’s a student at PIFA and works here to help pay his way through school.  I can tell you from personal knowledge that he is going to struggle dearly for what he did from a financial perspective, but knowing how Justin is, what’s really hurting him the most, no doubt, is being away from the children; and the children are being hurt most of all.  Just what is most important here, then, Doctor? Keeping the children as happy and pain free as possible, or proving a point?”

 

McKenzie sighed, feeling like he was being bombarded by two female howitzers.  Their passionate onslaught, combined with the pages and pages of signatures accumulated on the petition that he was holding in his hand, was hard to combat.  The emails and voicemail messages he had received for the past several days didn’t help, either, especially the one from Barton.  He wasn’t surprised to hear the two women waxing poetic regarding Taylor’s attributes; what they were telling him was just reinforcing what he had already heard.  But he _was_ surprised to hear that the suspended orderly was a student at PIFA.  He knew that school was a very prestigious one and extremely competitive when it came to acceptance; Taylor must indeed be highly gifted to be enrolled there.  “You realize this was an internal matter, and was supposed to be subject to confidentiality rules,” he said, making one last attempt to stick to his principles but finding it ringing hollow now, too…..there came a point when one had to admit defeat in the face of so much opposition, and he had an idea he was fast approaching that point now.

 

“It’s sort of too late to put the genie back into the bottle, don’t you think?” Cathy stated; having been at the hospital for almost 25 years now, she had long ago lost any fear of having to skirt around issues she passionately believed in, and she was strongly adamant in her conviction that the severity of Justin’s decision was way out of line.  “I personally don’t know how the information got out, Doctor, but it’s out.  I’m merely presenting you with proof that the majority of people aware of it are strongly opposed to your decision.  We all realize we don’t have the actual power to reinstate him; that’s up to you.  But we CAN tell you how we feel about it, and we don’t think it was fair.”

 

McKenzie nodded as he smiled slightly.  “I think I get that,” he stated wryly as he gazed at the two determined-looking women, one just starting out on her medical path and one about to wrap hers up.  Two ends of the spectrum, but apparently when it came to this particular young man they were in complete agreement.  He placed the clipboard down on his desk.  “Very well,” he told them as he watched their faces light up in anticipation.  “I’ll reconsider my decision,” he told them, noticing just a tinge of disappointment on their faces as they realized no change would be immediately forthcoming.  “That’s all I can promise, though.  That’s the best I can do.”

 

The two women locked gazes before they nodded slightly to each other and stood up, their ‘mission’ at least partly successful.  “I guess that’s all we can ask for now,” Daphne told him.  “I thank you at least for listening to our concerns.” 

 

McKenzie stood up and, after a couple of seconds, held his hand out to shake each woman’s in turn.  He had to admit – they had courage to even come in here and speak to him, and he had to respect that.  “It’s been _enlightening_ , Ladies,” he told them with a slight smile as he shook their hands.  “I trust you’ll come back when any other issues of concern arise?”

 

Daphne and Cathy smiled back at him as they said in unison, almost as if they had rehearsed it, “You can count on it.”

 

As the two women turned to leave and opened the door to exit, the doctor stood there and let out a heavy breath.  He shook his head, wondering how such a relatively small personnel issue had captured the attention of so many; clearly, this ‘orderly’ must be very special to a lot of people.  He sat back down thoughtfully, deciding he would have to settle this issue once and for all if he was to resume any semblance of normalcy to his schedule for the rest of the week.  Mulling over his options for several minutes, he finally picked up the phone to call his assistant as a sudden inspiration hit him.  “Kelly…..Get me Daniel Barton on the phone.” 

 

 

_Same Time – Brian’s Loft_

 

Justin stretched his hands over his head, imagining the feel of the outrageously-expensive sheets lying beneath his bare skin.  He kept his eyes closed, wanting to relish in the sensation of being in such a comfortable bed with his head lying on what had to be a sateen-adorned, feather down pillow.  He sighed in contentment, knowing in reality that it had to be some delicious dream.  He certainly knew his bed at the apartment never felt this good before, so that had to be the only logical explanation.  If it was, he didn’t want to wake up just yet….

 

His eyes flew wide open, however, as he felt a hot, wet mouth latch itself onto his cock and begin to suckle it like a newborn baby nursing on a bottle’s nipple.  “What….?” He managed to sputter out as his pulse shot up dramatically at the wondrous, sensual feel and he felt a rumble of laughter buzzing through the lips encasing his cock.  It both tickled and aroused him enormously as he raised his head just enough to find a pair of twinkling hazel orbs staring back at him from below. 

 

His face flushed as he realized then exactly where he was – and who he was with.  He had spent the night with Brian Kinney after they had had their long-anticipated, heart-to-heart talk.  Their cat-and-mouse, back-and-forth maneuvering last night had culminated in the most mind-blowing round of sex he ever had with anyone.  It had started with several passionate kisses on the couch and had quickly proceeded to here in Brian’s bed where the man had proceeded to voraciously fuck, suck, rim, and ram him for several hours.  He figured at best he had had about three hours’ sleep, but at the moment he wasn’t complaining – his pulse was racing so fast at the moment, he wasn’t even sure he could speak intelligently anyway….. 

 

His heart skipped a beat as he watched Brian smile through his sensual attack on his cock; he gasped as his lover placed his warm hand firmly around the base of his shaft as he began to attack his cock now in earnest.  Brian’s expert attention to his now fully-aroused cock made his body want to arch off the bed in response, but the brunet’s hand firmly pressing his left leg down onto the mattress prevented him from lifting his body up too far.  As his breath hitched and his lungs threatened to burst out of his chest, Brian began to speed up his ministrations, alternatively licking his slit, scraping his teeth across the underside, and suctioning his lips so tightly around his shaft he thought he would go crazy with desire.  He almost blindly reached out helplessly to fist some of Brian’s auburn hair in his hands as he felt his body quickly tightening with near excruciating torment.  Finally, unable to hold out any longer against the expert touch of his lover, he let out a loud cry and shot his load into Brian’s eagerly-awaiting mouth.

 

His chest heaving from exertion as his pulse continued to beat furiously, Brian slowly slithered up his sweaty body, his own impressive cock brushing against his belly as he pulled himself up to be face to face with him.  Bracing his own body on his hands to keep his heavier weight off his lover, Brian smiled down tenderly at Justin as he whispered, “Did you enjoy your wakeup call?  I know _I_ did.”

 

Justin blushed at the intense look in Brian’s eyes.  Even after several hours of lovemaking, all Brian had to do was look at him in that particular, sexy way of his and he would just melt with happiness.  He smiled back at him almost bashfully as he answered, “Yeah….I could get used to that.  Sure beats an alarm clock.”

 

Brian chuckled.  “What a compliment,” he joked, but his smile took any sting out of his comment.  He leaned down to kiss the soft lips; it was tentative at first but soon developed into a much more passionate one as their mouths opened and tongues snaked out to taste each other.  Several seconds later, Brian pulled back to gaze into the expressive blue eyes.  He placed an almost chaste kiss on Justin’s nose as the blond crinkled his face adorably in response.  Curling his lips under, he asked, “Would you like to wake _me_ up now?”

 

Justin grinned.  “I think that’s only fair, don’t you?”  He squeaked in surprise as Brian promptly flipped them over so Justin was draped across his chest.  He gently brushed some hair away from the brunet’s face, his heart threatening to burst from happiness as he slowly pushed his way down Brian’s taut, smooth body, taking his time to kiss and lick every inch of delicious, salty/sweet flesh.  His hands slowly followed along above him, softly trailing down Brian’s biceps, forearms and hands until he felt their fingers linked together silently.  Justin continued his trek with his mouth to Brian’s belly button, taking his time swirling his tongue around the puckered ‘innie’ as Brian moaned softly in encouragement.  Justin smiled at his positive response, feeling proud that he could make this magnificent man react to his ministrations in such an appreciative way.  He could feel Brian’s hands tighten in his as he slowly approached his glorious cock, now fully aroused and hard as steel.  He squeezed Brian’s right hand before releasing his long fingers as his hand followed his lips down toward Brian’s shaft, feeling the brunet shiver as his hand lightly touched the curly pubic hair nearby.  “What you do to me,” Justin murmured as his breath made Brian shiver in reaction.  “Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” he couldn’t help adding as he heard Brian laugh softly.

 

He looked up to meet Brian’s eyes, wondering if he was making fun of him, but all he saw was the same type of wondrous expression of desire reflected back at him.  He smiled at Brian in relief, licking his lips slightly in anticipation, before he turned his eyes back to the task at hand.  He grasped Brian’s cock lightly at first as his lover hissed at the initial contact before he curled his hand more firmly around the thickness, hearing Brian let out an even louder moan of pleasure at his more possessive touch.  Encouraged to continue, Justin stole one more glance up at his lover before he lowered his gaze to firmly attach his full lips to his ‘wake-up treat.’  He hollowed out his cheeks and pumped his lips up and down the engorged, silky skin in earnest; he didn’t need to hear Brian’s even louder moan of approval to know he was hitting the mark, because his lover’s body promptly lifted off the bed in response, threatening to push Justin off.  To his credit, however, he managed to keep his hand firmly latched onto Brian’s cock and he rode out the motion until Brian settled back down onto the bed with a grunt.  He could feel Brian’s heart beating rapidly like some caged bird as he lightly scraped his teeth against the underside of his cock.  He barely had time to attach his lips back onto Brian’s cock before the man cried out his name raggedly and promptly exploded into climax, the milky, sticky liquid shooting down Justin’s mouth as he struggled to swallow the copious amount. 

 

Several seconds later, he finally lifted his lips from the now sated body and slowly pulled himself back up the slick, hot skin as Brian broke off their handhold to slide one of his arms around Justin’s sweaty back to hold him close.  As Justin settled down onto Brian’s body, both hearts now beating in staccato synchrony, Justin nestled his head against Brian’s chest and sighed, wondering why he had resisted this for so long.  This feeling – this perfect harmony – was almost indescribable in its intensity.  At that moment, he couldn’t think of anywhere else he would rather be, and at last, he truly believed Brian felt the same way. 

 

Brian cradled the blond head against him with his hand against Justin’s cheek, savoring the feelings coursing through him – pleasure, definitely; Justin had wound up being the best lover he had ever had.  It was as if he could anticipate what he wanted and what he needed in order to derive the most intense pleasure from him.  Since they had started making love last night, this man had succeeded in taking him to heights of ecstasy he never knew he could ever achieve.  He didn’t know if it had something to do with the intense emotions that accompanied it, but he suspected it did.  He had never wanted to actually get to know another man before – not like this, not in an emotional way.  He simply derived whatever heights of pleasure he could get and promptly went on his way, never caring whether he ever saw the guy again or not.

 

But this was so much different; it scared him shitless in a way but it also excited and thrilled him.  He didn’t know what the future would hold, but he couldn’t wait to find out.  And he had every intention of making sure this man was by his side every step of the way.

 

He softly kissed the top of his head as, sated for now, he slowly closed his eyes.  The last thing he heard before he drifted off back to sleep was Justin’s soft sigh of contentment above him.

 

 

_Same Day – Mid-Afternoon_

 

“Well, I’m glad you came to your senses, McKenzie,” Barton told the doctor as he stood up to shake hands.  “I think it’s a fabulous idea, and you’ve got my full endorsement and support.”

 

McKenzie nodded, enormously relieved that their benefactor had not only agreed to maintain his funding for the cardiac wing but had also agreed to help finance his newest staffing idea.  “I’m extremely grateful for your assistance,” he told the tall, distinguished man.  At 6’3”, Daniel Barton stood out in any crowd with his tall, lean stature.  Even at 43, the man was exceptionally fit and quite athletic, often beating out several men less than half his age in charity marathons he liked to participate in throughout the year. 

 

“And I’m so glad to hear that Maria is still doing well,” McKenzie told the man sincerely.  “I have every hope that she will continue to make a complete recovery.” 

 

Barton nodded as he turned to go.  “I’m cautiously optimistic as well.  At least I know the next time she has to come in for a checkup, her favorite ex-orderly will still be here to greet her.  Don’t mess this up, McKenzie,” he warned softly, his eyes boring into the other man’s.  “Or I’ll still follow through on my promise.”  Just before he opened the door to leave, he added, “I really like that young man.  I’m glad you finally realized what a treasure you have there.”

 

McKenzie nodded as the man exited his office, letting out a whoosh of relief that Barton had agreed to go along with his plan.  Now there was only one more step – actually getting Justin to agree to it.  Quickly picking up Taylor’s folder he had secured from his desk drawer, he quickly scanned the employment sheet to locate the orderly’s phone number.  Placing the folder back down, he gazed at it thoughtfully for a few seconds before flipping his cell phone open to begin dialing the number.

 

 

_Same Time – Brian’s Loft_

 

Brian and Justin had finally left the king-sized bed, partly because they decided a shower was definitely needed after their several hours of lovemaking, but more because Justin’s stomach wouldn’t quit growling.  Brian had attempted to fuck him one more time, but his stomach loudly protested so vehemently he finally had to give up; of course, Justin’s laughter over his pained expression sort of killed the moment, anyway.  As they emerged from the shower partly dressed in jeans, the two sauntered over to the kitchen to try and scour up something to eat; Brian was consoled at least by the belief that Justin would remain a part of his life for some time to come, a _long_ time if he had his wish.  He definitely thought they had hashed out what they needed to last night and he was confident that he had properly explained his feelings to his lover adequately enough that Justin realized the depth of his feelings for him.  Oddly enough, it exhilarated him more than it terrified him as he met Justin’s gaze and smiled tenderly at him, receiving the same sort of contented response in return.

 

“I could heat up our dinner from last night,” Brian told him as he walked up behind the blond and wrapped his arms around Justin’s back to pin him up against the stove.  “I love watching the way you eat shrimp,” he huskily added as he leaned down to kiss the soft, pale neck. 

 

Justin blushed as he turned around in Brian’s arms, remembering exactly how his lover had fed him the shrimp; it had been both extremely arousing as well as tasty as he had sucked on Brian’s fingers along with the seafood.  The combination of butter, garlic, and Brian had been irresistible, but the oven had long ago been turned off and their food was cold as ice at the moment.  “Maybe later,” he whispered with a smile as Brian feigned an adorable little-boy pout.  “I know where that will lead to, and I’d like to reserve ‘dessert’ until I actually have some _food_ inside me, not your cock – as delectable as it is,” he hastened to add as Brian smirked in return.  “Do you have any _real_ food in this place besides our dinner?”

 

Brian grinned.  “I take it that doesn’t include poppers or beer.”

 

Justin snorted.  “Hardly.  I can run down to the corner,” he offered.  “I saw a grocery there on the way over last night.”

 

Brian shook his head.  “Don’t bother,” he told him, secretly not wanting to waste one minute being out of the blond’s sight.  “I’ll call a delivery in,” he suggested.  “What would you like?”

 

Justin smiled, secretly happy that he wouldn’t have to leave, either, even for a short time.  “You pick,” he told his lover.  “I can eat anything.”

 

“Yeah, I think you can,” Brian told him meaningfully as Justin blushed again, leaving no doubt that he was recalling how expertly the blond had eaten his _ass_ last night.  By the time Justin had rimmed and sucked on him with his talented tongue and had squeezed and kneaded every part of his cheeks and lower back, he had reduced him to a blithering, almost embarrassing mess of goo, but he couldn’t complain; it had felt incredible, and to his slight mortification, Justin had made him come just from his effort.  He couldn’t recall any other man ever doing that before, but then again, he had never quite met anyone like Justin before, either….

 

He nodded as he reached over to retrieve his cell phone from the kitchen bar counter.  Like perfect timing, a cell phone could be heard ringing as his flipped the top open, but it was immediately obvious it wasn’t his phone ringing because it was a distinctly different ring tone.  Justin laughed at the coincidence as he walked over to his jacket to dig his own cell phone out of his pocket.  “Hello?” he said.

 

“Is this Justin Taylor?”

 

Justin frowned; he recognized the voice from somewhere, but wasn’t immediately able to place it.  “Yes,” he answered hesitantly as Brian looked over at him curiously.

 

“Justin, this is Dr. McKenzie from the hospital.  Can you come to my office right away?  I have something to talk to you about.”

 

Justin’s heart sped up as the man identified himself.  What would the Chief of Staff want with him _now_?  Was he going to renege on his disciplinary punishment and fire him altogether?  Had something else been reported to him?  He couldn’t imagine what it was – it had only been the two times with Brian – but it still made his mouth go dry.  He was feeling lost enough as it was with having to be separated from his job for a week; if McKenzie let him go – which was his prerogative – he would miss all the children terribly and he would definitely be completely broke, unable to pay any of his bills…..  “Okay,” he finally managed to whisper.  “What time do you want to see me?”

 

“Whenever you get here,” he told Justin.  “I’ll have my assistant, Kelly, buzz you in, okay?  But I need you here as soon as you can get here.”

 

“Am I in more trouble?” Justin couldn’t help asking as Brian frowned in response this time to his question.

 

“I’d rather not discuss it over the phone, Mr. Taylor,” the doctor mysteriously supplied in a cool, polite tone.  “Just get here as soon as you’re able to, all right?  I’ll be waiting for you.”

 

As the man disconnected the phone, Justin slowly flipped his own phone closed and stared over at Brian, worry and puzzlement etched on his beautiful face.

 

“Was that McKenzie?” Brian asked him, reading between the lines of Justin’s conversation.  As Justin nodded in reply, he asked, “Any idea what he wants with you?  He’s caused enough problems already.”  He knew the man had a job to do, but he still bristled internally at what the man had done to Justin.  And to think Justin was still being loyal to the hospital; his lover was definitely being a lot more generous than HE would be.  He walked over to the blond and placed his hands on his shoulder to link them behind his head.  “You can still take me up on my offer, you know,” he said hopefully as he gazed into the troubled blue eyes.

 

Justin huffed softly.  “Keep it open,” he murmured worriedly.  “I may need it.”  He reached up to kiss Brian’s lips gently before whispering, “I think I’ll have to take a rain check on takeout, okay?  My stomach will be tied up in knots until I find out what he wants.” 

 

Brian nodded.  “Let me drive you to the hospital, then,” he offered.  “We can stop and pick up something to eat on the way.”

 

“You don’t have to do that,” Justin told him a little self-consciously, not wanting Brian to feel like he had to make amends anymore; he felt they had settled any issues between them last night and he didn’t want Brian to feel responsible for him.  “I can take the bus – I’m very familiar with the schedule, trust me,” he joked.  The bus was his normal, regular mode of transportation and he almost had the entire route map memorized by now.  It wasn’t nearly as convenient as having his own vehicle, but it was definitely cheaper.

 

Brian played with the soft hair behind Justin’s head as he replied, “Don’t be ridiculous, Justin – I’ll drive you, okay?  Besides, I admit; I’m dying of curiosity to know what he’s up to, also.  If he tries anything else, I swear, I’ll fucking…”

 

“Brian,” Justin responded, gently placing his hand over the other man’s lips.  “I can take care of it, okay?  I’ll deal with it, whatever it is…..”  He was quiet for a couple of seconds before he added, “I WILL take you up on your offer to drive me, though; I guess I’m as anxious to get there and find out what he wants as _you_ are.”

 

Brian nodded as he kissed Justin’s lips quickly before releasing him.  “Let’s go, then,” he said as he snatched his keys up from the counter.  He extended his hand out to Justin, who hesitated just for a second before he firmly placed his hand in his.  He had no idea what McKenzie wanted, but as he felt the warmth of Brian’s hand clasped in his, he knew Brian would be there to help weather it with him and that made his load just a little lighter.


	16. New Directions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Justin finds out what McKenzie has in store for him.

The corners of Brian’s mouth curled up as he glanced over at his passenger, who was fiddling nervously with a charcoal pencil as he twirled it back and forth in his hands.  “Keep doing that and you’ll have to be treated for lead poisoning when we get there,” Brian teased him.

 

“Huh?” Justin responded as he came out of his semi-trance state and looked over at Brian. 

 

“That pencil in your hand,” Brian explained as he nodded his head toward it.  “Maybe you should be a baton twirler instead of an artist.”

 

Justin blushed in embarrassment as he gripped the pencil tightly and stilled his hands.  “I’m just wondering what Dr. McKenzie wants, that’s all,” he told his companion, sighing.  “You don’t think he’s going to fire me, do you?” 

 

“What the fuck would he do _that_ for?” Brian growled.  “The man’s already suspended you without pay for a week.”  _Partly due to me_ , he couldn’t help thinking, but he knew Justin wouldn’t want him to say it.  “Besides, I still think it might be the best thing that ever happened to you – and to _me_ ,” he added with a smile as he curled his lips under and stared over at the intriguing blue eyes.

 

Justin let out an exasperated breath, even though his pulse quickened at the double meaning inherent in Brian’s statement.  “We’ve been through this already, Brian; I told you…”

 

“… You don’t want to give up working with the children,” Brian finished for him as Justin nodded.  He turned his eyes back to the road, afraid to reveal too much on his face as he added, “Well, you can’t blame me for trying; we advertising geniuses are nothing but persistent when we really want something.” 

 

Justin felt his face warm; after their lovemaking sessions last night and earlier today, he was finally convinced now that Brian _did_ want him, and not just as a one-time deal; fuck knows he felt the same way.  But as attractive as the idea sounded of working with this sexy, creative, and passionate man in an artistic capacity and at a wildly-successful advertising agency, he couldn’t give up helping all those children, no matter _how_ tempted he was by Brian’s offer.  “It may all be a moot point, anyway,” Justin replied sadly, more to himself than to his companion.  “I really hope he doesn’t fire me, though; if he does, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

 

Brian glanced over at him; sorry that Justin had to even go through this fiasco.  “Well, if he _does_ , it’ll be his fucking loss,” he replied gruffly, “and I know you’ll find some _other_ way to help them.  You could volunteer somewhere, you know.”

 

Justin shook his head.  “Not with my school schedule and having to work for a living to support myself.  Otherwise, I’d jump at the chance.”  He sighed.  “Maybe in the future I could do that, but now...”

 

“It’ll work out somehow, you’ll see,” Brian assured him confidently, thinking Justin was too talented and dedicated to stay unemployed for long if that’s what ultimately happened.  And if it DID, he intended on giving a certain chief of staff a piece of his mind again.

 

Justin nodded glumly as he turned his head to stare out the window, lost in thought.  When he had started his unglamorous job as a hospital orderly, he never in his wildest dreams thought he would grow so attached to his job there.  He figured it would be a way to pay his tuition and his monthly bills, and he’d spend his days doling out the meal trays and cleaning up before and after patients, nothing more than that.  But it hadn’t taken long before his ‘mundane job’ had developed into something much more meaningful when he had found himself becoming emotionally involved with each new patient.  The children were so innocent, so untarnished by ‘adult’ concerns, so trusting.  It seemed so unfair that at their tender age they were having to deal with matters that would bring most adults to their knees – and did where the parents were concerned.  Often times, he had found the young patients handled their serious illnesses much better than their parents did; how they maintained such a positive attitude in the face of so much pain and uncertainty never ceased to both amaze and astound him; it touched him deeply in a place of his heart that he wasn’t even aware that he had.  It hadn’t taken him long to realize that he was receiving so much more back than he was giving.  Now, though, it appeared that Dr. McKenzie was about to take all that away from him, and he exhaled a sorrowful breath at the thought.

 

His heartbeat quickened as he felt Brian’ hand on his shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.  As they turned into the hospital parking lot, he turned to give the brunet a grateful smile as Brian nodded.

 

 

“You sure you don’t want me to go up with you?” Brian pressed for the second time; he hated the idea of Justin being fed to the lions like some sacrificial lamb; after all, it had taken _two_ of them to get him into trouble, and he felt at least partly, if not mainly to blame for what had happened.  If he hadn’t been so relentless in his pursuit of his beautiful companion, Justin wouldn’t have had to face this dilemma in the first place.

 

“I’m sure,” Justin told him as they stood in the hospital’s lobby area near the elevators.  “McKenzie’s not so bad, Brian.  He could have done worse before – he could have just fired me outright.  I understand he has a job to do.  I just hope he hasn’t decided to get rid of me once and for _all_.”  He sighed as he ran one hand through his hair.  “But whatever he has in mind, I think it’s better if I see him alone.  There’s no point in inflaming things any further by my ‘accomplice in crime’ showing up _with_ me,” he added ruefully, grinning slightly to show that he didn’t blame Brian for what had happened.

 

Brian knew as he looked into the determined blue eyes that he wouldn’t change Justin’s mind.  He nodded.  “Okay,” he agreed.  “But I’m going to wait for you over there,” he said, indicating the open waiting area near the reception desk. 

 

“That’s not necess… “

 

“Yes, it is,” Brian told him curtly.  “I helped get you into this mess, so it’s the least I can do.”  He curled his lips under.  “Besides, I happen to know my boss personally, and I know he’d give me the time off for something as important as this.”  Justin smiled at him in appreciation as the bell sounded, indicating his car was approaching to go up to McKenzie’s floor.  The brunet looked around, noticing to his luck that there was no one else around in the short hallway.  Throwing caution to the wind, he quickly grasped Justin’s shoulders and leaned in to give him a brief kiss.  Pulling back, he whispered, “Go get ‘em, Florence.”   He nudged his nose with Justin’s playfully before giving him a gentle backward push into the empty elevator car. 

 

Brian’s reassuring smile was the last thing Justin saw before the door closed and the car gave a slight lurch to begin its ascent; it was enough to help quell the feeling of dread just a bit as he waited for the car to arrive at the chief of staff’s floor.  He was still quite nervous about what was awaiting him, but he knew at least he would have Brian waiting for him when he returned.

 

As Brian began to walk back toward the front lobby, he turned to give the now closed elevator doors one final look.  _You’d better treat him right, McKenzie,_ he silently warned, _or you’re a fucking fool…_ Walking over to the main reception area of the hospital, he tracked down a gift shop nearby, purchasing a copy of the morning paper for himself and a Snickers bar as either a consolation pick-me-up or a celebratory token of congratulations, whichever one applied to Justin, before he walked back over to one of the dark-red and silver metal chairs to sit down for what might be a long wait.

 

 

Justin emerged from the elevator car and turned toward the left to traverse the short distance down the hall to the end, where Dr. McKenzie’s impressive office suite was located.  By now he knew the location well, but it still didn’t keep his hands from becoming sweaty with anxiety as he opened the wooden door and walked in to stand in front of his assistant’s desk.

 

Kelly, the doctor’s assistant, eyed the rather nervous-looking young man politely from her place behind her L-shaped cubicle, noticing he looked familiar to her but not quite able to place him.  “Yes?  May I help you?”

 

“My name is Justin Taylor.  I received a call from Dr. McKenzie that he wanted to see me.”

 

The assistant smiled as she nodded.  “Yes, he said he’d see you immediately upon your arrival.  If you would have a seat for a moment, I’ll let him know you’re here.”

 

Justin nodded with a slight smile as he turned and walked over to a nearby couch located in the suite’s waiting area to sit down; he could hear the young woman picking up her phone to announce his appearance as he retrieved a worn copy of a news magazine from the coffee table in front of him and nervously began to flip through it.

 

He had barely had time to take a seat and begin looking at the dog-eared magazine when he heard the doctor’s inner office door opening.  As he lifted his gaze to take a look, he noticed Dr. McKenzie standing in the open doorway.  He couldn’t tell from the man’s neutral expression, however, what was about to happen.

 

“Justin.  Come on in,” he told him with a sweep of his hand as he held the door open.  Justin nodded as he rose from his place on the couch and walked over toward the doctor’s private office and entered, McKenzie following closely behind him as he softly shut the door. 

 

“Have a seat,” the doctor told him, indicating the chair directly across from his desk.  Justin felt oddly like someone going to an inquisition as he let out a hitched breath to calm himself and slowly sat down in the same chair he had occupied a few days ago, placing his hands in his lap as he looked over anxiously at probably the most important man in the hospital.  Now that he was finally here, his heart was beating furiously as his imagination ran wild over thoughts of exactly what was about to happen.

 

“You wanted to see me?” he asked softly.

 

The doctor nodded politely.  “Yes….it’s about your suspension.”

 

Justin took a hard swallow.  “My suspension?”  _Please…..no…_

 

“Yes,” McKenzie replied.  “I...need to revise it.”

 

Justin let out an worried breath; so it _was_ what he thought.  “You’re letting me go?” 

 

McKenzie frowned.  “Letting you go?”  As Justin nodded, he shook his head.  “No…not at all.  In fact, I’m cutting your suspension short; I actually want you to come back to work starting tomorrow.”

 

Justin blinked, thinking he must have heard what the doctor said wrong.  “Come back to work?  Tomorrow?”  To his enormous relief, though, the doctor nodded his head in confirmation.

 

McKenzie leaned back in his leather chair as he steepled his fingers together.  “Yes, but there’s a catch; it won’t be in the same capacity.”

 

Justin’s face fell; so that explained it.  He was going to be allowed to return but with some sort of demotion.  Was he being sent down to the laundry room or commissary to work?  Maintenance?  Landscaping?  He knew those were all important jobs in their own right, but none of them involved working with the children.  “Where… Where will I be working, then?” he asked, dreading the answer.

 

To his surprise, McKenzie actually smiled now as he said, “We’re creating a new position that I’d like for you to fill for us.  In a way, I think you’ve already been performing a lot of the same duties that would be required of you, at least from what so many other people have told me over the past few days.”

 

Justin stared at him, thunderstruck.  “People have been talking about me?   I… I swear, I haven’t been discussing it with…”

 

McKenzie dismissed his fears with a wave of his hand.  “Doesn’t matter.  I know how hospital gossip works; it doesn’t take long for something to get out and once it does, if people aren’t happy about it, believe me, they let me know.”  _Boy, DO they,_ he thought wryly.  He had received several more e-mail messages since he had met with Barton earlier, in fact; there appeared to be no end to them.  Perhaps after he got done with his meeting here, however, that would change.  “It seems a lot of employees here have grown quite impressed with the empathy and compassion you display for our patients.  They’ve told me over the past few days – in spades, I might add – that you have an unusual ability to put even the most ill of our patients at ease and help alleviate their pain, at least temporarily.  And I’ve also heard from a lot of present and former patients’ parents who are not happy with my decision.”

 

Justin’s eyes widened in shock; he had had absolutely no idea this had been happening during his absence – all for _him_?  One insignificant orderly?  “They… They _have_?”

 

McKenzie twisted his mouth wryly.  “Yeah…answering their phone calls and messages has almost become a full-time job for me lately.”  He cleared his throat.  “Anyway, I’m also aware of your incredible artistic talent and how you’ve been using it to make both the patients and parents feel better.”  He eyed Justin thoughtfully.  “I wasn’t aware that you’ve been drawing portraits of the deceased patients for their parents, Justin.” 

 

Justin fidgeted uncomfortably at the intense look he was getting; he had never really meant for that to become open knowledge – that was never the reason why he had done it.  “I... I just thought it might be a way to help them remember their child in happier times,” he explained to the doctor softly, who nodded in understanding.

 

“I’m sure you did,” McKenzie told him.  “And I’ve had several parents tell me how much those portraits meant to them; several of them even sent me photos of them where they’ve proudly displayed them on top of a piano or shelf or their fireplace mantel.  They’re really incredible, Justin,” he told the young man sincerely.  He had been astounded by the likeness and meticulous detail his employee had put into each effort; it was almost as if the child were still alive, which he was certain was the intention. 

 

Justin couldn’t help smiling at the compliment.  “Thank you,” he said softly.  “I’m just glad I could put my artistic ability to good use and that it helps them in some way.”

 

McKenzie nodded.  “Well, I think I’ve got another way you can put your artistic ability to good use – in your new job.”

 

Justin held his breath; it certainly didn’t _sound_ like the chief of staff was putting him in one of those other jobs he had thought about.  “My new job?”  He was beginning to feel like he sounded like a parrot or a robot, repeating back the doctor’s words each time, but he was finding the whole situation so unreal it was all he could think to say at the moment.

 

McKenzie smiled.  “Yes.  Do you remember Maria Barton?”

 

Justin smiled back at him in instant recognition, recalling the little girl’s dark brown, almost black, almond-shaped eyes, olive skin and long, shiny black hair.  Her time in the hospital as she awaited her heart surgery had provided him with his first experience in the intricate technique of braiding hair, because Maria always insisted on wearing it that way.  It had absolutely nothing to do with his duties as an orderly, but that hadn’t stopped him from learning.  By the time she had left the hospital, he was a pro at it and they were fast friends.  “Yes, I remember her,” he told the doctor warmly.  “Heart patient; had the greatest laugh when I told her some corny joke and always had to have her hair in a braid.  How is she?”

 

McKenzie smiled – both at the thought of how their patient was doing and at how Justin had described her; only someone who went above and beyond the call of duty as a mere orderly would be privy to those types of details.  That simply served to convince him even more that he was doing the right thing.  “She’s doing great,” he assured the young man as Justin nodded in relief.  “Her father was in here today – said she’s wearing them out.”

 

Justin beamed.  “That’s great,” he said.  “I’m so glad.  She’s a beautiful girl.”

 

McKenzie nodded.  “Yes.  And by the way, Daniel Barton thinks very highly of you; in fact, he threatened to pull his funding from the new cardiac wing if I didn’t rectify your situation.”

 

Justin’s eyes almost bugged out of his head.  Was there no end to the surprises this afternoon?  “He did?”

 

McKenzie grinned.  “He sure did,” he advised his guest.  “Came in person, too, to let me know in no uncertain terms what he thought of my decision.  That certainly got my attention, trust me.”

 

Justin licked his lips thoughtfully.  “So that’s why you’ve cut my suspension short and are offering me some other job?  Because if you feel like you’re somehow being coerced into doing this and I’m really not qualified, I’d rather not…”

 

“No,” McKenzie reassured him quickly.  “Like I said, he certainly made me reconsider my decision, along with the little visit I got earlier from Dr. Chanders and Kathy McDonald, not to mention the petition they dropped off with dozens of signatures on it.”  As Justin looked at him in shock, he quickly added, “But I’m chief of staff, and I don’t do _anything_ unless I feel it’s best for the hospital.  So this was MY decision.  But to be completely upfront with you, if I wasn’t getting Mr. Barton’s financial backing for it, this position I’m creating would never have gotten off the ground.  I’ve actually wanted to do something like this for a while now, but the hospital has never really had a good candidate for it or the financial wherewithal to do it.  Thanks to Barton, though, and his confidence in your qualities and talents, I do now.”  He eyed Justin thoughtfully for a few seconds, knowing the young man was no doubt dying to know what he was talking about.  “Now keep in mind it would just be an assistant position at first; you have to have the proper training for a full-time job.  But I took the liberty of checking with PIFA and discovered they have a reciprocal agreement with Pittsburgh Technical College, so they have agreed to coordinate your training together, as long as you’re okay with pursuing a minor in it along with your art studies.  _And_ you’ll have to work closely with our psychotherapists and psychology department, along with our physical therapists, to devise the proper patient protocol based on each child’s needs.”

 

Justin couldn’t stand it any longer; his head was spinning.  He leaned forward in his chair, his hands on his knees as he beseeched the other man, “Dr. McKenzie, please… tell me exactly what type of “assistant” position we’re talking about!”

 

McKenzie looked at him sheepishly, realizing he had been rattling on; but he was extremely buoyed over the wonderful benefits this might provide for their patients, and he was convinced this would put them on the map when it came to children’s hospitals throughout the country.  “Of course… sorry,” he apologized, taking his glasses off and placing them down on his desk.  “I’d like to create a new art therapy department at the hospital, and I’d like for you to be our first art therapy assistant – that is, until you can get the proper training to be a full-fledged therapist.  Then you would be promoted to a full art therapist position; that is, if that’s something you would want to pursue.” 

 

Justin’s eyes widened; he had never really heard of such a thing.  He was certainly aware of psychotherapists and physical therapists – but an _art_ therapist?  He was absolutely intrigued, though, as well as excited.  “What exactly would I be doing?” he asked.

 

“Well, as I said, you’d be working along with the psychotherapists and physical therapists to provide hands-on art instruction to patients – not so much on the mechanics of _how_ to draw art – we’re not interested in training any Picassos here; but on how to use the type of media being employed, whether it’s clay, watercolors, ceramics… whatever the hospital staff in charge of the patient’s treatment thought would be appropriate, including yourself.  You’d not only be working with the patient to express themselves emotionally through their art, but you’d also sometimes merely be there to provide companionship, support, and hopefully help them to forget their pain and their problems for a while.  You’d be working with patients who we anticipate would be here for a short stay in the hospital for purposes of improving their motor skills, but you’d also be working with chronically-ill patients and even some terminally-ill cases.”  The doctor peered into Justin’s face, noticing the young blond listening to him raptly.  “Would you be comfortable working with the more critically-ill children?  I know you’ve been doing that already in the recreation area, but this would be on a more on-going, permanent basis.  You realize some of these children will probably never leave here ever again.  Would you be able to put your feelings on that matter aside to help them forget, at least for a little while?  To help their parents also cope with their child’s illness?”

 

Justin couldn’t believe this was happening; he had come here fully expecting bad news from the Chief of Staff and he had just handed him what sounded like a dream job to him.  He shook his head slightly in disbelief before saying first softly, and then more firmly, “Yes… _Yes._  I would be honored;  I don’t know what to say…” 

 

McKenzie smiled in satisfaction.  “Well, we’ll have to work around your PIFA schedule, at least during the school year; in the summer, though, we’d like for you to be here on a full-time basis.  And, of course, your new job will also come with a new salary – a substantially _higher_ new salary, thanks in part to Mr. Barton’s generosity.  When I told him what I had in mind and who I wanted to offer the position to, he was very enthusiastic about it and he offered me more than enough financial backing to get it off the ground.”  He picked up a piece of paper lying in front of him.  “Here’s a copy of the contract,” he told Justin as he handed the document to him.  “Why don’t you take it home and review it overnight?  If everything is satisfactory to you, I’ll need for you to sign it at the bottom and bring it in with you tomorrow when you come back to work; I’d like to meet with you sometime in the morning if possible – when is your last class at school?  Then we can meet with the others who will be involved with getting this program off the ground afterward.”  He eyed Justin thoughtfully as he leaned back up in his seat and stared intently at his visitor.  “I think you’ll find that it’s a very generous offer, Justin; I think this is a perfect fit for you – _and_ the hospital.  So when can I expect you tomorrow?”

 

Justin stared down at the piece of paper he was holding as his mouth hung open in disbelief; it _felt_ real. It _WAS_ real, he realized, as he read over some of the language and verified he wasn’t dreaming.  And the salary – holy shit; it was almost _double_ what he was making now!  He shook his head, almost feeling like he needed to pinch himself to make sure once more that he wasn’t dreaming.   He finally found his voice enough to inform the doctor, “I’m afraid I don’t get out of class tomorrow until 1:00, but I could be here no later than 2.”

 

McKenzie nodded as he pushed back from the desk and rose from his seat.  “That should be okay – I’ll have Kelly schedule a meeting for us at 2, then,” he told him.  He smiled as Justin stood up and he shook his hand.  “I’m looking forward to seeing this program evolve, Justin, and I have confidence that you’ll do us proud.  I’ll be interested in your unique input as an artist.”

 

Justin nodded with an appreciative smile; just before he turned to go, the paper clutched firmly in his hand, he had to ask about one more thing that was troubling him.  “Can I ask you something, Doctor?”

 

McKenzie smiled.  “Of course – what is it?” 

 

“What about the doctor who reported me for… you know, the situation that caused my suspension?  I’m sure he’s not going to be happy when he learns about this.  He might think I’m being rewarded for my behavior now, instead of being punished.  I don’t want to cause the hospital any negative publicity.”  He really hated to bring the subject up, afraid that it might cause the chief of staff to change his mind about his unbelievable job offer, but he thought it prudent to get it out in the open now if all of his dreams were going to be dashed.

 

To his relief, however, McKenzie told him, “I’m the chief of staff at this hospital, Justin; my decisions are mine alone.  Yeah, I have a suspicion the good doctor might not agree with my decision, but that’s _his_ problem.  I happen to think you’ve served enough of a suspension for your indiscretion, and I’m very excited about implementing this new program; I feel it will be very beneficial to our patients and set a new standard for pediatric care.  I will deal with any backlash over my decision.”  Justin nodded, reassured, as McKenzie added, “Now, if you don’t mind – I have a very busy calendar today.  Will you excuse me?”

 

“Sure,” Justin told him as he turned to go.  As he placed his hand on the doorknob, he hesitated before turning around to say, “I want to thank you for this opportunity, Dr. McKenzie.  I still can’t quite believe it, but this means the world to me.  To be able to help these children and do it with my art, it’s like a dream come true for me.  I promise I’ll do a good job for you and you won’t regret it.”

 

Dr. McKenzie smiled.  “I’m sure you will,” he told him as he sat back down at his desk.  “I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”

 

Justin nodded as he opened the door and left the other man’s office, still trying to come down from the high he found himself on; he still couldn’t quite believe it, but as he glanced down once more at the piece of paper spelling it out in black and white legalese, he knew it was true.  He practically skipped out of the outer office, to the doctor’s assistant’s amusement, throwing an excited “thank you” back to her before he rushed out of the suite and hurried over to the elevator.  He couldn’t wait to tell Brian what had just happened!  He impatiently jabbed the elevator button and bounced lightly on one foot and then the other as he waited for the car to appear, briefly considering actually taking the steps and running down them, but just as he started to search around for the exit door, he heard the bell chime to indicate the car was approaching.  He hurried inside as soon as the doors had opened enough to allow him entry, the piece of white paper curled into a roll as he held it firmly in his hand.  The floor numbers seemed to take interminably long to flash above him until finally, the bell dinged once more and the car came to a slow stop on the lobby level.  As the elevator car opened, he scooted to the side for incoming passengers as he rushed out of the car, anxiously scanning the immediate area for any sign of Brian. 

 

Not finding nearby, he hurried to the end of the short hallway containing the elevators and took off almost at a run to the right toward the main lobby.  As he reached the open-spaced, circular waiting area, he anxiously searched the faces of those sitting in the industrial-looking, maroon and silver chairs until his heart leapt in recognition as he spotted Brian reading part of a newspaper over in a fairly secluded corner. 

 

Eyes twinkling mischievously as a sadistic plan entered his mind, he pasted a neutral expression on his face as he rushed over to where Brian was sitting.

 

As he approached, Brian sensed movement out of the corner of his eye and lifted his gaze from the paper to see Justin rushing toward him, a piece of paper clutched in one hand.  His heart fell as he noticed the somber-looking expression on Justin’s face; his worst fear had been realized – Justin must have been fired after all.  He felt his blood boil; he was going to personally go up there himself and have a little ‘discussion’ with McKenzie over how pathetic and stupid his decision was. 

 

He placed his paper down on an adjacent chair as Justin rushed up to him.  “Justin?” he asked softly, brushing his hands nervously over his legs as he stood up and peered into the troubled-looking blue eyes.  “What happened?”

 

“Not here,” Justin told him tersely as he grabbed the taller man’s suit sleeve and pulled him toward the entrance; it was obvious he wanted to leave immediately.  Brian took a deep breath in dread; if Justin didn’t want to tell him right away and preferred to speak to him privately, he must be right.  Preparing to comfort Justin over what had happened, he allowed the blond to pull him toward the revolving entrance/exit door in silence, wondering just what he could say or do to make Justin feel better.  He knew his lover had to be absolutely devastated over this latest course of events.

 

They walked in silence for several seconds toward the lot where Brian’s vehicle was parked until, finally satisfied that they were alone in the sea of cars, Justin suddenly whirled around and jumped into Brian’s startled arms.  “You’re not going to fucking _believe_ it, Brian!” he said excitedly as he wrapped his arms around the brunet’s neck and plastered his body against his.

 

Brian’s eyes widened; this did not sound like someone who was devastated over being fired from a job that meant so much to him.  He managed to pry Justin’s arms from around his neck enough to peer into the beautiful face that was now beaming with joy.  He frowned in complete confusion now.  “Justin?  What… What the hell?  Didn’t McKenzie _fire_ you?” 

 

Justin laughed and shook his head before he began to rain butterfly kisses all over Brian’s neck and face.  “No…. he offered me a _different_ job!”

 

Brian pulled away from him to stare into his eyes, making sure he wasn’t imaging things.  “A new _job_?  What kind of new job?  Justin… You _did_ ask him what he had in mind, didn’t you?”  He suddenly had a vision of Justin walking around the hospital grounds with one of those pointy sticks, assigned to picking up litter and cigarette butts.  If that’s what that asshole McKenzie had in mind…

 

“No… I mean, yes!” Justin exclaimed breathlessly.  “What I mean is, yes, he _told_ me what it was!  Brian, they’re creating a new art therapy department, and he wants ME to be their therapy assistant and work with the children through my art!  How fucking perfect is _that_?  But, wait!  Here’s the best part!  No, working with the children is!  Shit!  Anyway, he’s offering to work around my schedule at school and I’ll be making almost _double_ what I was making as an _orderly!_ ”  Justin’s words tumbled out in an exuberant torrent as his face shone up at Brian radiantly; he still could hardly believe his good fortune.  It was as if McKenzie had read his mind as to what his dream job would be and had crafted a new position at the hospital just for him.

 

Brian wrapped his arms around Justin’s waist and gazed into the wondrous pools of blue that were positively sparkling with happiness; and the _smile_.  He had seen Justin smile before but never like this.  My God, he had a smile like no other he had ever seen.  Silently he vowed to see that smile again, but next time because of something _he_ did.  “That’s… That’s unbelievable, Justin,” Brian told him with a tender smile.  He sobered somewhat, though, needing to make sure.  “Don’t take offense,” he quickly advised, “But are you positive about this?  I mean, are you sure you heard him right?” 

 

To his relief, Justin didn’t seem to be offended by his skepticism as he removed his arms from his neck and held up the now somewhat-crumpled piece of white paper that Brian had previously suspected was a termination paper.  The brunet took it from his outstretched hand and scanned the contents to verify that Justin was, indeed, correct about his new job offer as an assistant art therapist.  More importantly, he was _also_ accurate about his new salary.  In fact, it appeared that his lover would now be making about the same amount of money Brian would have offered him to start out in the art department at Kinnetik; of course, that also included some “other” fringe benefits that Justin wouldn’t be receiving at the hospital – at least he’d _better_ not – but by the look in Justin’s eyes it didn’t matter; he was ecstatic about his new position. 

 

Justin eyed him with a little concern when Brian didn’t say anything as he continued to review the contract he had been given.  “Brian?  It _is_ legitimate, isn’t it?” he asked.  “I didn’t misread it, did I?” He hated reading paperwork that contained so much legal mumbo-jumbo; was it possible he had missed something?  Brian, though, was well-versed in just this sort of legal language; he figured if anyone would know if he was being deceived, he would.

 

Brian gave the precious piece of paper back to Justin and shook his head.  “No, Florence, it’s legit, all right.”  He wrapped his hands around Justin’s slender waist and smiled down at him in amazement.  “What the hell happened between ‘conduct unbecoming an orderly’ and getting a new job at almost double your salary?” 

 

Justin lightly stroked the back of Brian’s neck, fingering the soft auburn hair with his hands as he replied, “Well, apparently word got around the hospital about what happened and a lot of people didn’t exactly agree with what he did.  And Daniel Barton helped – in fact, he’s partially funding the new art therapy department.”

 

“Daniel Barton?”

 

Justin nodded.  “Yeah – his daughter was in the hospital recently with a heart condition and I helped to take care of her.  Apparently, he appreciated what I did,” he said humbly.

 

“I think there was more to it than that,” Brian declared as Justin’s face flushed.  “I think as usual you went above and beyond the call of orderly duty, didn’t you?”

 

Justin averted his eyes, for some reason uncomfortable giving himself accolades.  “I… I just can’t help it,” he whispered.  “I can’t just see them in those hospital beds, feeling so sick and scared, and not try to help do something about it.”

 

Brian took one of his hands and placed it softly but firmly under Justin’s chin to lift his eyes to peer into the soft blue ones.  “I don’t think you give yourself enough credit, Justin,” he whispered.  “But I’m glad someone _else_ did.”  He hated the idea of not being able to work with this fascinating man every day, but he was resolved that they would see each other frequently just the same; he realized how much this job meant to him, and he wouldn’t want to take that away from him, no matter _how_ much he wanted to see Justin all the time.   “It’s a damn good thing McKenzie came to his senses – I would have hated to go up there and make another scene.”

 

He was rewarded with a shy smile.  “You would have done that for me?”

 

Brian curled his lips under, unaccustomed to baring his feelings so much.  “In a heartbeat, _Florence_ ,” he whispered fervently as he leaned down to kiss the soft, enticing pink lips, glad that they were temporarily hidden from any prying eyes as they found themselves between a pickup truck and a tall SUV parked next to it. 

 

Several seconds and a good tongue fucking later, both men pulled back a little breathlessly as Brian murmured huskily, “Why don’t I take you back to the loft so we can _properly_ celebrate in private?  We don’t want the hospital’s new art therapy assistant to get into trouble _again_ before he starts his new job.”

 

Justin blushed at the velvety tone of Brian’s voice and the intense look he was receiving; there was no doubt just what sort of ‘celebration’ Brian had in mind.  “I’d like that,” he told his companion almost shyly, trying to concentrate as Brian continued to hold him in his arms; he could feel him pulling his long-sleeved dress shirt up from behind his back and gasped as he felt a pair of long-fingered, warm hands begin to lightly stroke the flesh there.  He struggled to maintain a coherent thought as he replied in a hitched voice, “But don’t you need to go into work at least for a while?”

 

“Shit, no,” Brian assured him as he waggled his eyebrows.  “That’s what cell phones are for.  Now all I have to do is teach Theodore how to _use_ one to call me during a crisis.”  To his consternation, lately Ted had been overplaying his new-found confidence at work just a bit too much, making ‘executive’ decisions by himself without checking with him first.  “On second thought, maybe I’ll give my office a call, just to make sure he hasn’t fucked up one of my major accounts in my absence.”  He released his hold on Justin to take his hand and lead him toward his ‘Vette. 

 

“But if you’re afraid something will go wrong at work…”

 

Brian turned to face his companion.  “Justin… Quit being such a worrywart.  I’m just kidding; I’m sure everything’s fine – after all, he had _me_ as his teacher.”   They resumed their walking and shortly reached Brian’s ‘Vette.  As he unlocked the car door for Justin to get in, he couldn’t resist giving the blond one more quick kiss on his lips for reassurance.  “I’ve got everything under control, _Florence_ ,” he said as Justin rplled hi eyes in response; something told him he would have that nickname for the rest of his life, at least where this man was concerned.  But he decided if that meant that Brian would be around to call him that for a long time, he could definitely learn to live with it – at least in private. 

 

“Uh… If it’s okay with you, can we just keep that little nickname between ourselves – _Leroy_?”

 

Brian chuckled.  “You’ve got a deal, smartass,” he replied as Justin grinned and slid into the passenger seat.  As he walked around and opened the driver’s side door to get in, he turned to Justin before he started the car and told him, “By the way, remind me to properly discipline you when we get back to my loft for making me think you’d been fired.”

 

“My pleasure,” Justin whispered promptly; the words out of his mouth before he could think of the consequences.  He felt his face growing warm again at the thought of just what sort of ‘punishment’ Brian had in mind; damn, all Brian had to do was look at him a certain way and it happened every time. 

 

Brian laughed at Justin’s remark as he started up the car and they left the parking lot; as he took Justin’s hand briefly and gave it a squeeze, the two locked gazes and smiled at each other.  “Way to go, Justin,” Brian told him as the blond beamed.  “You win and more importantly, the _patients_ win.”


	17. Boiling Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Several issues come to a "head" in this chapter, some good, some not so good... Combination smut/angst alert ahead...!

_Brian’s Loft – 30 minutes later_

 

“Okay, tell me again why I let you talk me into this.”  Brian grunted as he toted in two heavy paper grocery bags and unceremoniously dropped them onto the kitchen island. 

 

“So I could pay you back for driving me over to the hospital,” Justin reminded him as he stood up on his tiptoes and peeked inside one of the bags to retrieve the package of boneless chicken breasts.  “I know we got cornstarch,” he said, frowning slightly as he began to rummage through some of the other grocery items in search of the small-sized bag.

 

Brian watched in amusement for a few moments before he easily retrieved the small container of cornstarch at the bottom of the other grocery sack and placed it down on the countertop.  “Here you go, Emeril,” he said teasingly as Justin glared at him.  He curled his lips under before adding, “I’m sorry – would you prefer Florence instead?”  

 

Justin rolled his eyes.  “Just find me the Swiss cheese, okay?  And I need the ham – you should be familiar with _that_.”

 

Brian chuckled softly at Justin’s impertinence as he pulled out the bottle of white wine first, and then located the two items Justin needed.  As he handed them to his companion, he grimaced.  “A screw top on a wine bottle, Florence?  Have I taught you nothing about good taste?”  He reached down and possessively squeezed Justin’s cock through his jeans as a soft moan erupted from the perfectly-formed pink lips in response.  “I thought I already demonstrated the proper use for a screw, and it’s _not_ for a wine bottle.”

 

Justin flushed as a heated sensation flooded his body.  “Well, I’m sorry if this disturbs your sensibilities, Mr. Kinney, but I didn’t see a need to spend fifty bucks on a bottle of zinfandel for chicken cordon bleu.”  He pulled away slightly from Brian before he forgot how to make his dish completely and deliberately concentrated on retrieving the rest of his ingredients from the two grocery bags instead, walking over to place what he would need on the counter area next to the stove. 

 

Leaning his long body against the kitchen island, Brian unscrewed the top of the wine bottle and took a presumptive swig as he watched Justin preparing to fix their dinner, fascinated at how graceful and fluid the other man’s movements were, even while performing such a mundane task.  His mind couldn’t help wandering to a vision of how ‘graceful’ his guest had been last night, also, while their bodies had rocked together as one in the throes of several rounds of passion.  Now that he and Justin had finally made love, he was finding it hard to keep his hands off him when they were anywhere near each other; it was like some sort of sickness, some addiction that he had.   He could feel his cock twitching with appreciation as Justin bent over to pull out the metal drawer located beneath the oven to look for a large pot in which to prepare their meal, providing him with a perfect vista of his incredible ass. 

 

“Uh… How long will it take to prepare this masterpiece, Chef?” he managed to say finally.  “And, by the way, where in the fuck did you learn to cook, anyway?  I wouldn’t think someone on your salary – at least your _old_ salary – could afford such extravagant dishes.”

 

Justin flicked his wrist to turn the knob on for the front burner of Brian’s stove as he turned his head over his shoulder to look at him and smiled.  “My mom’s a really good cook, and this is her signature dish.  She’s served it so many times, I know it by heart.  It’s really not that hard; it’ll just need to simmer for about 30 minutes after I get the chicken prepared for the pot.”  He reached over to the bottle of olive oil nearby and poured a small amount into the preheating pan. 

 

Brian put the wine bottle down on the counter to slowly approach him from behind and slide his arms around the slender waist, inhaling the musky, enticing scent of his lover as his breath on Justin’s neck created a slight shiver in the other man.  He could feel Justin’s initial jolt of startled surprise before he leaned back willingly into his arms.  “Well, _that_ may not be hard, but something _else_ is,” he whispered in Justin’s ear as his tongue came out and began to lick a circular, leisurely path around the fleshy lobe; he knew Justin wouldn’t have any problems ascertaining just what _was_ hard as he pulled the blond’s body firmly against his.  “And I don’t _need_ any simmering – I’m already on full boil right now.” 

 

Justin couldn’t help snickering at the outright sexy but humorous statement; he was at once highly amused and enormously turned on as his body temperature began to quickly rise along with the burner’s.  “Yes, I can see that,” Justin replied a little breathlessly.  “Or should I say _feel_ that.”  Trying hard to concentrate on the task at hand but finding it extremely difficult with Brian’s body practically plastered against his, he struggled to ask, “Where are your tongs?”

 

“Thongs?”  Brian asked cheekily.

 

Justin flushed merely at the thought of Brian wearing something like that; of course, it still paled next to his lover wearing nothing at all, but just the idea of peeling a pair of skin-tight thongs off his glorious body that was presently glued to his was enough to ramp up his temperature even more.  “No, you asshole, I said _tongs_ ,” he struggled to say as Brian chuckled, obviously proving he had heard him correctly the first time.  “I need something to pick the chicken up with.” 

 

Brian didn’t move as he merely told him, “Top drawer to your right.  Don’t mind me, though – I’ll just stay right here and watch the master chef at work.”  He was enjoying the feel of Justin in his arms too much to break off their embrace just yet.

 

Justin grinned, thoroughly enjoying himself.  Now that he had a brand new job with a brand new salary, and best of all had the attention of an incredibly sexy man to boot, he was feeling almost delirious with bliss.  Perhaps he would need to go to the hospital himself to be checked out… _Later_ , _though_ … _Much later_. 

 

He reached over to pull open the narrow top drawer to the right of the stove and locate the tongs.  Placing them down next to the package of fresh chicken breasts, he smiled.  “Uh… I need a couple of medium-sized bowls now,” he told his companion.  “I don’t suppose that’s within reaching distance, too?” 

 

In response, Brian silently reached over his head with one hand and opened the top cabinet directly above the silverware drawer, snagging two white, everyday Corelle mixing bowls and placing them down next to the carton of eggs. 

 

Justin shook his head in amazement; Brian had managed to do that with one hand still firmly wrapped around his waist and had barely moved from his position.  He supposed there was a definite advantage to being tall and lean.  He tried once more to concentrate on his culinary task as he felt Brian take his free hand and slowly slide it down his right shoulder and arm, his touch feather light but creating goose bumps on his skin.  He quickly flipped open the egg carton’s top and reached in to grab one of the eggs and crack it against the counter edge to open it and pour the contents into the bowl, throwing the shell back into the container. 

 

He was about to open up the package of flour and mix it in the other bowl with the paprika when he felt Brian fidgeting behind him; every time his crotch moved side to side against his ass, his own cock sprung more and more to life.  He sighed in exasperation.  “Brian,” he whispered in amusement, his voice catching despite his irritation.  “Your dick keeps getting in the way of my dinner.” 

 

Brian chuckled in his ear as both hands began an exploration of his ass cheeks now.  “Well, maybe you’d better just take care of it first so it will behave for a while.”  He began to nuzzle Justin’s neck now, his lips roaming softly over the pale flesh as Justin found himself arching his neck away from his pursuit, subconsciously allowing Brian easier access to his target.

 

He couldn’t help reaching back to place his right hand against Brian’s cheek as he snorted.  “I don’t think it _knows_ how to behave.”  He heard Brian chuckle slightly as the other man’s lips slowly traveled up to his _other_ cheek to give him a kiss there.  “Can’t it wait for just a few more minutes?  Then it will have my ass’s undivided attention.”

 

“Promise?” Brian whispered against his ear as his hands began to knead the ass in question; Justin had a feeling that any second now those talented hands would be snaking inside his pants to get an even _more_ up close and personal inspection. 

 

He shivered at the hot breath against his skin.  “Yes, I promise, I promise!” he exclaimed breathlessly.  “Now, go make yourself useful somewhere else so I can concentrate here,” he chided him as he pushed back against him to jar him loose. 

 

Brian laughed softly.  He gave Justin one more kiss on the cheek before he finally removed his hands from his companion and sighed.  “Okay,” he agreed reluctantly.  “I’ll go make some calls to Kinnetik to make sure nobody’s fucked up my accounts.  You, though, have fifteen minutes before I promise you _WON’T_ be standing…”  He walked over to a drawer directly to the left of the kitchen sink and pulled out a white, circular-shaped timer, turning the knob to set it at precisely fifteen minutes.  Justin gave him a puzzled look, no doubt wondering why he even possessed such a contraption; it certainly didn’t appear that Brian had a culinary bone in his body.  As the device began to tick off the time, his companion arched his eyebrows at the blond and in his best scolding, schoolmarm voice explained to him, “Just in case you want to cheat or something.”

 

Justin grinned as Brian walked toward the kitchen island nearby and, picking up his cell phone, ambled over to the living room couch and promptly plopped down with his long legs on the coffee table.  A few seconds later he heard him speaking to someone on the phone about one of his accounts.

 

He sighed in contentment; he felt so damned lucky.  Not only did he have a wonderful new job working with the children that he adored, he had somehow managed to attract a man who could have anyone he wanted, and he wanted _him_.  His pulse began to race in anticipation as he heard Brian calling out to him shortly afterward, “Tick, tick, tick, Florence.” 

 

Justin laughed as he quickly secured a piece of Swiss cheese and ham slice to each chicken breast with toothpicks and coated them with the egg and the flour mixture, dropping each piece into the oiled pan.  He stood there for a few minutes, waiting impatiently for one side to brown and then the other before he located the matching lid in the drawer underneath and covered it.  He turned the heat down for it to simmer for the next thirty minutes just in time to hear the timer’s bell going off, not only signaling that his preparation time was up but also no doubt signaling that something _else_ was about to heat up instead.

 

Sure enough, no sooner had the bell gone off than he heard Brian say from close by, “Ding, ding, time’s up.” 

 

He turned around and his heart stopped in his throat; Brian was leaning lazily against one of the loft’s massive steel beams from a few feet away, wearing nothing but a smirk on his face as his eyes bored into his.  Justin’s gaze couldn’t help roaming downward to admire Brian’s impressive cock at full attention as he subconsciously licked his lips in anticipation, the chicken cordon bleu quickly forgotten.  Brian slowly walked over to him and smiled at his reaction.  He reached out to firmly grab Justin by the wrist to begin walking him backward toward the bedroom.  “Finally,” he whispered huskily; Justin watched with widened eyes at the predatory, lust-driven look on Brian’s face as he growled, “If I don’t fuck you in the next five minutes, I’m going to explode,” he growled.  The two reached Brian’s raised bedroom in record time as Justin unexpectedly bumped up against the step behind him and began to stumble; he was saved injury, however, when Brian deftly reached out to grab his shoulders and slammed their bodies together.  Justin gasped at the feelings that coursed through him as Brian molded their lips together and began to plunder his mouth hungrily; tired of waiting any longer, he reached down while they kissed and roughly pulled Justin’s shirt apart, the buttons flying across the room as he proceeded to yank the fabric off the slender shoulders.  Justin managed somehow to lower his arms enough for Brian to pull the shirt all the way off before his lover threw the now- tattered garment to the floor. 

 

An absurd notion entered Justin’s mind that he wouldn’t have any shirt to wear to work tomorrow before all rational thought quickly escaped him as Brian broke off their kiss long enough to help Justin step up onto the raised bedroom floor and push him down onto the mattress; he bounced off the bed slightly and lay there, holding his upper body up with his arms as Brian reached down and pulled his shoes and socks off.  The two locked pregnant gazes for a moment before Brian knelt on the bed in between Justin’s legs and leaned down on his arms to tower over the slim body.  “I’m going to fuck you until you see stars in the back of your head,” he vowed. 

 

Justin flushed a deep shade of pink at Brian’s tone of voice as the brunet leaned down and swiped his tongue over his lips possessively before raising back up on his knees to urgently unbutton the fly of Justin’s jeans and pull them down the slender hips.  Justin managed to raise his legs just enough for Brian to pull them along with his briefs all the way off as finally he succeeded in divesting his lover of all his clothes.  He remained still for a few moments to simply admire the beauty beneath him, watching as Justin blushed adorably under his scrutiny.  It had taken them some time to reach this point of no return – including a persistent campaign of persuasion on his part that he really did care for this man deeply – but now that they had come to an understanding, he couldn’t imagine his life without this man in it.  He knew he had a lot yet to learn about Justin, having known him for a relatively short time, but boy was he going to enjoy finding out.  For now, though, he would be content to demonstrate to him just how much he meant to him. 

 

He smiled reassuringly at him as he leaned in to support himself on his arms, push-up style, to bestow a slow, scorching kiss on Justin’s open mouth, snaking his tongue in to imbibe in a full-bodied taste of what was inside. 

 

Justin’s heart was hammering in his chest as Brian languorously attacked his mouth with his lips and his tongue; he could feel his lover’s cock hanging between them, leaving a wet trail of patent desire across his belly as it swept across his skin.  He reached up to firmly cup Brian’s face as the brunet finally pulled back just enough to stare into his eyes, his face leaving no question that he was about to make good on his previous promise to fuck him to within an inch of his life.  “Brian,” he whispered urgently, knowing he wasn’t going to last very long from the sensations rushing through him if Brian didn’t move on soon, and he didn’t want to come this way, not after what he had experienced last night; he knew the best was yet to come – in more ways than one.  “I need you inside me,” he urged him as he gazed into his darkened eyes.  “I can’t wait any longer; fuck me,” he entreated softly, his voice full of need as well as want.

 

“My pleasure,” Brian drawled in that silky tone of voice that set Justin’s blood on fire.  He lingered long enough to kiss and lick a wet trail with his lips down Justin’s face, starting with his eyelids and moving on down to his nose and mouth before moving southward to the side of his neck and his shoulders, while his hands began a downward journey along Justin’s arms, reveling in the smooth skin under his touch.  He could feel Justin’s heart beating rapidly underneath him and was surprised to realize his own heart was beating at the same frantic rhythm; never before had another man caused his own body to ramp up the way that this man did, not when it came to his fragile, vulnerable heart.  The heart that, with the exception of his son, had never been so exposed before to anyone else; it was a testimonial of just how deeply this man had affected him in such a short time, and it both scared and excited him at the same time. 

 

Justin squirmed under the exquisite sensations being generated by Brian’s body and his touch; every slight movement of his lover’s hands, lips and legs set his body on fire.  Ironically enough, now that Brian had him in his bed where he wanted him, _he_ was the one impatient to get on with it; Brian, on the other hand, seemed to be deriving extreme demonic pleasure in prolonging the event as long as possible.  He gasped suddenly as he felt one of Brian’s hands firmly latch onto his cock finally and proceed to slide up and down it like he was fine-tuning a well-loved instrument while the other hand began to fondle his balls lightly back and forth in his palm like a warm, curved, heated blanket.  “God!” His body instinctively arched off the bed and he cried out in part agony, part pleasure as Brian briefly flicked the tip of his cock back and forth playfully with his thumb before he resumed his up and down motion on the shaft, slowly picking up speed and pressure as Justin’s body threatened to explode in torment.  “Bri-an,” he pleaded desperately, his heart now pounding with anticipation; he could feel his body tensing as it cried out a warning of imminent release.  “Fuck!  I… I can’t last with you doing that!” 

 

Brian chuckled softly, his lips vibrating against Justin’s belly as he slowly raised his face to peer into the pleading blue ones.  “I was just trying to make sure your chicken didn’t burn,” he helpfully pointed out as he smiled lazily up at him, watching Justin’s eyes narrowing, clearly broadcasting a silent message that could only mean he was calling him an endearment along like the lines of _asshole or fucker_ , no doubt. 

 

“Fuck the chicken,” Justin snarled as he reached down and grabbed a fistful of Brian’s hair to yank his head upward to force him to look at him. 

 

“Sorry, Florence, I’m not into bestiality,” he snarked as Justin huffed out an exasperated breath.  He smiled.  To Justin’s great relief, he let go of his cock and, placing his hands on Justin’s waist, he slowly slid back up until they were face to face with each other.  Brian grinned, enjoying himself thoroughly.  At that moment, he knew where they were heading and he couldn’t think of anywhere else he would rather be, other than lying here on top of this beautiful blond.  He licked his lips and grinned at Justin’s look of frustrated aggravation, unable to keep from nuzzling his nose like an Eskimo briefly before he captured the lips once more in a searing kiss; at first Justin refused to kiss him back but that lasted all of a couple of seconds before he felt the soft lips underneath his open up like an enticing flower and he once more drunk eagerly from what he was offered.

 

Several seconds later, he broke off the kiss and raised back up onto his knees as he peered down at the panting, sweaty body lying below him, impatiently waiting to move onto what they both knew was inevitable.  Under the soft orange glow of the lights nearby, Justin’s body was even more beautiful as the blue eyes gazed up into his expectantly.  He found a soft smile slowly spreading across his face at the look of impatience on Justin’s face.  “Don’t worry, Florence,” he murmured as he reached over to the contemporary, sleek night table to retrieve a condom and a small tube of lube from a silver-colored, shallow bowl.  “We both want the same thing – trust me,” he assured him as he tore open the condom package with his teeth, noticing Justin never taking his eyes off him. 

 

As Brian slid the condom down over his cock and rubbed a dollop of the slippery gel in his palms to heat it up to room temperature, he found to his shock that his earlier promise of fucking Justin hard and fast was quickly beginning to be replaced with something much more tender in nature.  He was astounded that he could be feeling those sorts of emotions for another man – any other time, it would just be out-and-out fucking – a quick, efficient way to satisfy his urges and derive the utmost in pleasure, the same as most other queers.  But as he locked gazes with Justin, he knew things had changed - _he_ had been changed by this fiery, beautiful blond anxiously waiting for him to fuck the daylights out of him.  And he would – gladly; it just wouldn’t be the rough and tumble way he had imagined earlier, at least not this time... 

 

Justin frowned slightly at the almost hesitant way Brian was acting; had he done something wrong?  “Brian?” he asked softly, momentarily forgetting his body crying out for release.  “What?” he pressed.

 

Brian shook his head imperceptibly.  “Nothing,” he smiled gently, as he reached down and ran his fingers slowly across the soft, full lips; he wasn’t quite prepared just yet to expose his deep emotions to his lover just yet.  He curled his lips under, assuming a typical devil-may-care expression.  “Just admiring the view before I fuck you into oblivion.”

 

Justin flushed at the compliment.  “Well, I’m admiring mine, too, but I’d admire it a lot better if you’d move in a little closer – _much_ closer,” he said almost shyly.  He was still getting somewhat used to having this glorious-looking man all to himself.  At least, he _hoped_ that was the case.  He certainly knew that Brian hadn’t left his side in the last several hours, not even to go to work.  He wasn’t naïve enough to think that Brian would only be exclusive to him – not yet, anyway – but he silently resolved to work toward that goal somehow.  For now, though, he was definitely going to enjoy the one-on-one time he had with him. 

 

“A very good idea, Mr. Taylor,” Brian told him as he reached down to spread some of the lube around his lover’s wonderfully-tight hole; he could feel it pulsing around his fingers as he poked one inside tentatively, eliciting a distinctive groan from below.  Taking that as a positive sign, he pushed one more finger inside, spreading them to open the hole wider as Justin bent his legs and spread them apart to allow Brian greater access.  He blushed as Brian smiled down at his eagerness, but moaned loudly as Brian hit just the right spot to put him into sensual orbit.   An intelligible grunt emerged from his lips as he cried out, “Fuck me, Brian!,” unable to take much more before he shot his load all over his lover prematurely.  “I need you inside me _now_!”

 

“Can’t think of a place I’d rather be,” Brian responded with a feral smile, almost afraid he was giving too much of his feelings away. He grasped Justin’s legs, lightly skimming his hands over them before he raised them to his shoulders as Justin linked them behind his head and licked his lips eagerly; Brian saw that as an invitation and leaned down for a brief kiss of heaven before he at last lined his cock up and slowly pushed inside, never taking his eyes off his lover’s.   As he felt the tight warmth welcoming him there, he couldn’t help thinking, _heaven indeed…_

 

“Ah, fuck, Justin, you feel _so_ good,” he murmured as he waited for the blond to adjust.  After a couple of seconds Justin placed his hand on Brian’s thigh in silent signal for him to go deeper as he pushed in more, an involuntary groan of exquisite pleasure escaping his lips as he finally went even deeper, ramming full hilt into Justin’s body, marveling at the smaller man’s resiliency and strength as Justin pushed against him in perfect synchrony.   “So good,” he kept repeating as he began a steady, sensual rhythm while Justin pushed his body off the bed as much as possible to heighten both of their pleasure.  “God, Justin!” he growled as he felt his body tensing, crying out for relief.  He picked up his tempo, knowing by the feel of Justin’s muscles clenching harder around his cock that the end was approaching for both of them.   Continuing to stare intently into the eyes that were now darkened with lust and need for him, he reached down to pump Justin’s slickened cock with his sweaty hand as he thrust in and out faster and faster…

 

“Uhh… Brian - God!” Justin cried out abruptly as he clutched Brian’s biceps tightly, his fingers digging into the firm flesh as he climaxed, spilling the milky, sticky mixture all over their glistening, hot skin.  He managed somehow to keep his feet linked behind Brian’s back as the brunet’s face contorted into the throes of ultimate passion and he, too, shot his seed in copious amounts into the condom, filling it to capacity in short order.  

 

Breathing heavily, Brian couldn’t help collapsing onto his lover’s chest as Justin’s legs dropped to intertwine with his own, his hands coming to rest on Justin’s shoulders as he nestled his head in the crook of his lover’s neck and nuzzled his cheek with his nose, breathing in the scent of a sated Justin in post-coital bliss.  He could sense Justin’s body struggling to return to normal as he felt the slender hands wrap themselves around his body and slowly stroke his sweat-soaked back, both for anchor as well as a need to remain linked together in body as well as soul. 

 

As Brian continued to lay there, draping the smaller body like a warm blanket, he knew there would be no way to ever separate the two; just as he was currently cradling the body beneath him, Justin had just as securely wrapped himself around his heart.  He felt his dick softening as he reluctantly twisted his body to the side to remove and tie off the condom, tossing it down on the floor next to the bed.  He lay there, bracing his head with one hand as his other hand reached over to push back some strands of soaked golden hair from Justin’s forehead.  He reached out to gather up some of Justin’s quickly-drying come from the pale belly and bring a taste to his lips as he whispered, still a little out of breath, “I dare you to come up with a better cream sauce than this.” 

 

Justin’s face reddened considerably; if he hadn’t had his hands draped across Brian’s back, he would have covered his face to hide the flushed cheeks that suddenly appeared.  The other man’s eyes, his voice, conveyed so much without him actually saying the words that silently went along with them – _I  care for you, I want you, I feel happy with you…_ The same exact feelings he was experiencing himself at the moment.  Instead, he kept his hands on Brian’s back as he smiled shyly up at his gorgeous lover and just relished in the feelings washing over him. 

 

Brian smirked back lazily in that look that drove him wild before he reached one hand up to Justin’s face and curved it alongside his cheek and the top of his head to cradle it.  He reached down to steal one additional, quick kiss from the fully ravaged, pink lips before he sighed softly in regret.  “As much as I’d love to continue this, Emeril,” he whispered in a sexy tone of voice, “I think someone’s chicken’s about to burn.”

 

“Shit!” The blond cried out; he had promptly forgotten about their dinner – something had ‘come up’ to divert his attention elsewhere.  He began to push up against Brian to get up, only to find his body firmly held down in place.  “Brian… You want burned chicken for dinner and a fire alarm going off?”

 

Brian grinned at the beautiful, anxious-looking face.  “It would be worth it,” he found himself admitting as Justin couldn’t help blushing in return at his response.  “But smoke in my designer furniture?  That would be a real bitch to remove.”  He reluctantly rose from his lover and twisted off the bed, walking toward the bathroom.  “I’ll be right back,” he promised, as he looked over at the small, spherical alarm clock he kept on his night stand.  “You’ve got a few minutes yet.”  He returned shortly afterward with a warm, dampened washcloth. 

 

Justin watched in fascination from his place on the bed as Brian came back over to sit on the edge of the mattress and proceeded to tenderly wash the remnants of their lovemaking off his chest and belly. 

 

“I remember when you did this for Gus,” he recalled softly.  “Although for a much different reason,” he added with a smirk as Justin smiled in recollection.  “But I was struck by how gentle you were with him that night,” he confided, curling his lips under a little self-consciously; he was unaccustomed to exposing his feelings to anyone else and found the sensation just a little disconcerting.  Nevertheless, he lifted his gaze from his task to stare into the intense blue eyes.  “I’ll never forget that, Justin,” he told his companion softly.  “That meant a lot to me.”

 

“Brian…” Justin replied quietly, touched by his lover’s declaration. “You already thanked me before; besides, I like to think I treat every child that way,” he murmured in protest, not wanting to take extra credit for what he did.

 

Brian finished up his ministrations and laid the washcloth down on the floor for the moment, not quite wanting to part just yet.  He reached over to grasp Justin’s hand, rubbing it softly between his fingers.  “I’m sure you do,” Brian told him.  “That’s why you’re going to be perfect for this new job.  And why they’re damn lucky that you said yes instead of telling them to kiss your ass instead.”

 

Justin’s eyes twinkled.  “I thought that was _your_ job,” he said impertinently, watching as Brian grinned in return.

 

The brunet leaned in to whisper, “If you weren’t about to have a catastrophe in my kitchen, I’d be more than happy to take care of that right now.”  Justin’s face once more flushed in response as Brian grinned at his predictable reaction.  “We’ll just have to save that treat for later, though; someone promised me dinner first.”

 

Justin grinned as Brian reached over to kiss his nose playfully before he released his hand to stand up from the bed.  Snatching the washcloth from the floor, he said, “I could use a shower, though,” His voice lowered an octave as he suggested helpfully, “Why don’t you go check on our masterpiece first and then join me?” 

 

Justin grinned as he said in mock protest, “I thought you said you were going to wait for dessert; now you want another fuck before dinner?” He quickly scooted off the bed, however, as Brian began to walk away, turning with an almost ‘come hither’ look as he curled his lips under and waggled his eyebrows at him. 

 

“So I changed my mind,” he replied with a shrug. “Fuck convention!” he cried out, raising his hand as if he were Julius Caesar delivering a mandate.  Just before he disappeared out of sight, Justin heard him say, “Don’t make me start the timer again,” before the blond heard the shower start up.

 

Laughing, he turned back to the kitchen to check on the chicken; a wondrous aroma assailed his nose as he lifted the lid approvingly.  All he had to do now was prepare the sauce, but that could wait a little while – he had much more pleasurable activities on his mind at the moment, and his cock was quickly rising to the occasion. 

 

Turning the burner down to its lowest setting, he placed the lid back on and, smiling, hurried over to the bathroom to join his lover.  Right now, at that moment, he thought life couldn’t get any better than this.

 

* * *

 

 

_Next Day – Mid-Afternoon_

 

Justin twisted his hands nervously as he stood in the elevator, waiting for it to emerge on the fourth floor.  He was grateful that Dr. McKenzie had agreed to see him around 2, because that had given him enough time this morning – with a lift from Brian – to rush over to his apartment and change into business casual clothes for both school and his meeting here.  After his and Brian’s frenzied lovemaking last night – and this morning – the shirt he had been wearing was practically in tatters now.  He felt his face warm as he recalled the multi-faceted bouts of combination fucking, lovemaking, kissing, sucking, rimming and ramming both he and his tender ass had endured since last night at his lover’s hands; Brian had definitely demonstrated his range of skills and techniques last night on him and in practically every conceivable position as well, some of which he didn’t know were even anatomically viable ones. 

 

“Shit,” he muttered, feeling himself harden just at the recollection.  He purposefully began to count to a hundred, imagining buckets of ice cubes being thrown on top of his head, and anything else that might damper his ardor so he didn’t embarrass himself once he arrived at the Chief of Staff’s conference room to meet with both McKenzie and the other members of the staff he would be working with.  Somehow, after his previous ‘indiscretion,’ he didn’t think it would behoove him to show up with a woody.  He sighed – all he had to do with _think_ about Brian and it made him crazy.  He made a promise to himself to make sure going forward he thought about some _other_ topic while he was at work, even though he knew that would be quite difficult. 

 

Fortunately by the time the elevator had reached the fourth floor, his body had calmed down sufficiently that he could hide his lascivious thoughts from his coworkers.  He straightened his shoulders as he got out of the elevator and turned left toward McKenzie’s suite, trying hard to keep his pulse at a normal level.  His palms were sweating with nerves, however, and inside he could feel his stomach roiling in waves of trepidation the closer he got to the Chief of Staff’s main entrance door.  He let out a deep breath before he steeled himself and turned the knob to go in.

 

Kelly, the doctor’s assistant, smiled politely this time as he entered, now able to recognize the new art therapy department employee.  “Mr. Taylor,” she said coolly with a nod.  “The doctor and the others are waiting for you in the conference room.  He said for you to go on in when you got here.”  She motioned to her right.  “It’s the last door at the end,” she told him. 

 

He nodded his gratitude as he slowly trod down the hall.  As hallways went, it was quite short – only about 15 feet or so – but his feet felt like they were made of lead and it seemed to take an interminable time to reach the heavy wooden door indicated.  He wiped his palms on his dark gray linen pants before he took one more calming breath and turned the brass knob to open it inward.

 

As soon as he opened it, every head and pair of eyes turned to gaze upon him, increasing his anxiety even more.  It had been hard enough yesterday to come here and speak to the most important doctor in the hospital, but that was nothing compared to this – he recognized several other important members of the staff, including a couple of psychiatrists who he knew from what others had told him had been on staff there for several years, along with a couple of the head charge nurses.  He nodded in relief as he recognized Cathy McDonald from the ICU – she had always been quite congenial around him and had treated him as a unique person, not just another orderly.  She smiled and nodded in greeting before he swept his gaze around the rest of the conference room.  His face lit up with a big smile as he noticed Daphne sitting among the rest of the members.  She flashed a bright smile of her own as she met his gaze, making him feel enormously better. 

 

“Justin,” Dr. McKenzie greeted him warmly from the opposite end of the table as he stood up.  “Come on in and I’ll introduce you to everyone.” 

 

Justin nodded as he quietly closed the door and entered.  Dr. McKenzie walked over to his side and announced, “Staff, some of you already know this young man, but for those of you who don’t, this is Justin Taylor, our assistant art therapist for the newly-created department that we are implementing effective immediately.  Justin, I’d like to introduce to you the other members of the advisory committee who will be assisting in formulating an effective game plan for our new department.  Some of these individuals will be providing only initial feedback,” the doctor explained, “while others will be conferring with you on a regular basis regarding their own patients.”  The doctor stood next to a dark-haired, middle-aged woman to his right to begin the introductions.  “Justin, this is Dr. Marla Meadows, our chief psychiatrist on staff.  She will be a permanent committee member.”

 

Justin reached down to shake her hand; the woman nodded politely and grasped it firmly for a few seconds before letting it go.  “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Justin.  May I call you that?”  As the blond nodded, she added, “I’ve heard some excellent things about you, both from other employees as well as parents of several of my patients.  I’m very intrigued about incorporating art therapy into my patients’ recovery.”

 

“Thank you,” Justin told her humbly.  “I’m looking forward to the challenge.”

 

The doctor proceeded to introduce Justin to each member in attendance as the blond received at the very least a polite acknowledgement from some and a more enthusiastic welcome from others who were more familiar with him.  By chance Daphne wound up being the last person to be introduced.  As the doctor approached her chair, she rose from the conference room table and impulsively gave Justin a firm hug.  As she pulled back from him, Justin could actually see tears in her eyes as she whispered in his ear, “I’m so happy for you, Justin.  The hospital is very lucky, too.” 

 

Justin beamed at her.  “Thanks, Da… Uh, Dr. Chanders,” he corrected himself, not wanting to embarrass her with too much familiarity, especially in front of the Chief of Staff.  “I’m really excited about my new job.”

 

“You’re buying lunch next time, by the way,” she teased as Justin chuckled softly. 

 

“You got a deal,” he whispered back, not sure how much to reveal to the others about just how close their friendship was.  He nodded at Daphne before turning his attention back to Dr. McKenzie.

 

The older man motioned to the seat next to the resident.  “Have a seat, then, Justin, and we’ll get started.”

 

Justin nodded as he pulled out the office chair and sat down.  He turned to smile at Daphne as she quietly reached out and squeezed his wrist in a silent indication of congratulations and happiness for his good fortune before he turned his attention back to the group at large to begin their preliminary work regarding formation of the new art therapy department.

 

 

_Thirty Minutes Later – Second Floor_

 

“Is Dr. Swanson in?” Kelly asked as she marched into the chief surgeon’s office suite on the second floor.  “I need to speak with him right away.”

 

“He’s on a conference call,” the doctor’s assistant, a classically-attired, elegant-looking blond woman by the name of Rosalie Sanders, told her. 

 

“I’ll wait then,” the younger woman told her firmly as she turned and plopped down on the visitor’s couch located by the opposite wall.

 

Rosalie nodded, placing a neutral expression on her face, but inside she was fuming.  She would have liked nothing better than to tell this haughty bitch to come back some other time, that she had no idea how long the conference call would take, but she knew better.  She realized if she showed the least hint of exasperation or rudeness with the girlfriend of her boss’s son she would wind up paying for it.  As highly paid as she was to be Swanson’s executive assistant, she _also_ knew that he could be a downright prick when he was annoyed with her.  And she _also_ knew from past experience that this young woman was excellent at creating havoc where her own job was concerned; one day she had forgotten to tell Swanson about a message the other woman had left regarding some family barbecue he was supposed to attend at his son’s home and the man had threatened to actually fire her over it.  She bit back the retort she wanted so badly to say before she nodded and told her instead, “I’ll let him know you’re here just as soon as he gets off.”

 

Kelly crossed her hands impatiently over her arms and huffed out an aggravated breath, crossing her legs as she swung them back and forth in aggravation.  She had been able to get someone from the temporary pool to take over for her for a half hour or so while McKenzie was in his conference meeting, but she knew she had to get back soon or he would notice she had left her desk for an extended period of time.  As much as she didn’t always agree with what McKenzie did policy-wise, she also knew it was the best-paying job she had ever had, and she didn’t want to risk losing it.  Of course, it hadn’t hurt that she personally knew Swanson’s son intimately; it had certainly helped her when McKenzie’s previous assistant had retired and they were looking for a replacement.  She realized that normally such an important job would be reserved for someone who had worked their way up through the ranks of the hospital, rather than an outsider, but Swanson had strongly insisted she be seriously considered for the job when it had become open.  Partly in deference to her business credentials and office skills, in addition to his recommendation, she had managed a few months ago to snag the job.  Now she felt like perhaps it was time for a little thank you payback to her boyfriend’s father.

 

She glanced up as she heard Swanson’s assistant pick up the phone and report to her boss that she was waiting to speak with him.  A few seconds later, the older woman advised, “You can go in now, Ms. Hutchins.” 

 

Rising with a perfunctory, cool nod, Kelly turned and strode to the door, firmly pushing the door handle down and striding into the familiar room.  By courtesy of her relationship with the man’s son, as well as previous visits for various hospital matters, she was quite comfortable by now in the prestigious man’s inner sanctum.

 

Rosalie waited until the woman had turned her back to leave before she rolled her eyes, silently resentful of the other woman’s presumptuousness.   Huffing out an irritated breath, she forced herself to return to her laptop to work on her next project, all the time wondering just what the other woman wanted now with her boss.

 

Swanson gazed over at Kelly as she entered and smiled politely.  He knew this young woman was both manipulative as well as headstrong, but he actually saw a little of himself in her attitude and could identify with her ambition.  Besides, for some inexplicable reason, his normally timid son appeared to be in love with this assertive young girl, so he was willing to put up with her.  “Kelly,” he said, motioning for her to sit down in one of the stainless steel chairs directly in front of his sleek, contemporary glass topped desk.  Unlike most of the more stodgy professionals at the hospital, he much preferred the modern, clean lines of newer designer furniture, rather than the archaic-looking, bulky wooden office pieces that so many of his peers seemed to gravitate to.  “What’s on your mind?” he asked curiously, peering at her from over his wire-rimmed glasses.

 

Her eyes flashed.  “I’ll tell you what’s on my mind,” she reported in a clipped voice, her face scowling.  “You know the new art therapy department the hospital is creating?”

 

He nodded.   “Yeah, I heard about it; there was a long e-mail sent out with all the details this morning.  I didn’t really pay too much attention to it, though, since it really has nothing to do with my own work.”  With his schedule, he barely had time to sleep, let alone pay much attention to attempts by the Chief of Staff to placate the artsy, touchy-feely crowd.  “What about it?” 

 

She stared back at him smugly.  “Well, you’ll never in a million years guess who the new art therapy assistant is.  Justin Taylor.”

 

Swanson frowned; why did that name sound familiar?  “Justin Taylor… I’ve heard that name before.  But again, Kelly, why the fuck should I care _who_ they got?  It doesn’t have anything to do with me.  I’m not going to have anything to do with that function.”

 

She wrinkled her nose in disgust.  “Well, _I’ll_ tell you why you should care; Justin Taylor is the orderly who was recently suspended for kissing that other man in public.  Apparently not only is his suspension over now, but he’s been rewarded with a new job – and a hefty raise to boot.  Some punishment.”

 

Swanson’s face darkened in anger.  “Tell me you’re playing some sort of sick joke here,” he growled with deadly calm.  “If you are, I don’t find it funny at all.” 

 

“I wish I was,” she reported, her lips drawn tightly together.  She and Swanson may not be buddy-buddy with each other, and may never have a warm relationship, but they _did_ agree on one thing – the perverted behavior that Taylor had engaged in had no place in the hospital, and neither did he.  “But I saw him and overheard the whole thing, plus I had the _pleasure_ of drafting the email that went out this morning, specifically mentioning him by name – if you had taken the time to read all of it.  In fact, he’s meeting right now with the members of the advisory board to brainstorm ideas for setting the art therapy program up.”  She recalled how she had been forced to plaster on a polite greeting when the young blond had appeared earlier today; it was all she could do not to throw the man out when he had walked in, ready to assume a job that some other, well-deserving, _normal_ person should have been given.  She had been brought up staunchly Protestant by her minister father, and he had firmly ingrained in her what was right and normal, and this man’s lifestyle was neither. 

 

She watched as her words sunk in and the Chief Surgeon’s veins stood out on his neck; she could almost see the other man’s blood pressure rising as he replied, “You have got to be fucking _kidding_ me!  The man was suspended for a week and shows up now with a new job?”  He brushed his hand through his hair in fury.  “I don’t fucking _believe_ this bullshit!  He should have been fired, just like I told McKenzie!” he snarled as he rose from his chair.  “Come on!  I’ve got to see this for myself!”

 

She nodded in righteous agreement as she turned and Swanson followed her out the door.  “I’m going out,” the doctor told his assistant cryptically as he abruptly rushed out of the suite behind the younger woman.

 

Rosalie sighed in irritation, knowing she would now have to try and figure out just how long the man intended to be gone so she would know which of his scheduled visitors to call and reschedule.  She should be used to it by now, though; the man was extremely exasperating when he left without giving her enough information.  It certainly didn’t make her job any easier.  Shaking her head, she booted up her desktop computer and began to scan the calendar for the day before picking up her phone to start making the necessary calls of apology.

 

 

Reaching McKenzie’s office suite, Swanson hurried along on the heels of the other man’s assistant, not even bothering to slow down as he stomped down the hall toward the conference room.  Without any preamble, he grabbed the doorknob and yanked it open as Kelly chose judiciously to quietly return to her desk as if nothing was amiss.  Several pairs of eyes turned to look curiously at him, wondering why they had been so unceremoniously interrupted, before Swanson’s gaze settled on the young blond man he instantly recognized from the other day, the same one that had been cavorting with an older brunet, totally uncaring of whoever saw what they were doing.  He had hoped he would never see the man again, but to his total disgust apparently his son’s girlfriend had been correct.

 

“What do you want, Swanson?” McKenzie asked him wearily from his end of the table.  “I’m conducting an important business meeting here.” 

 

“That’s what YOU think!” Swanson roared as he stared over at Justin, who flinched at the vitriolic tone of his voice.  “I want to talk to you, McKenzie – NOW!”

 

McKenzie sighed, a little embarrassed to be so rudely interrupted in front of his staff.  But somehow, he wasn’t surprised his arrogant, pompous chief surgeon had found out who the new art therapy assistant was and had put two and two together.  He knew he would probably have to deal with the man’s wrath at some point, but he had been hoping it would be later rather than sooner.  It seemed, however, that it was not meant to be.  The chief of staff pushed back from the table and rose from his chair.  “Very well, _Doctor_ ,” he replied calmly, the title being spoken with a definite tone of disdain.  “I will speak with you.  _Privately_.”  He eyed the other man intently, refusing to back down.  He had no intention of airing their dirty laundry in front of the entire room’s participants, nor did he think Justin, specifically, should be subject to what was no doubt going to be an extremely tense interaction.  As he walked toward the other man standing near the exit door, just before he reached him he turned to Justin with a polite smile of reassurance and said, “Justin, why don’t you and the others continue our discussion while I’m gone?  You can fill me in on the details afterward.”

 

Justin nodded, but he couldn’t stay completely silent; he instinctively knew what the other man wanted to speak to McKenzie about and it filled him with a profound sense of dread.  “Doctor…” he began, his voice asking an unspoken question.

 

McKenzie turned to shake his head as if to say _not now_.  “It’s okay,” he told him firmly.  “Go ahead.  Everything will be fine.”  He nodded at him as if to say _I can handle this_ before he turned and followed the chief surgeon out the door, closing it firmly behind him.

 

The entire room stood there in stunned silence for several seconds, unsure how to proceed or what to do.  Some of them had no way of knowing what was afoot, but for others such as Cathy McDonald and Daphne, they knew exactly what was about to be discussed and both women were extremely concerned for their friend.  Daphne reached over to squeeze Justin’s leg as he turned to look at her.  She smiled, nodding.  “Go ahead, Justin,” she urged him softly so only he could hear.  “It’s your show.  Don’t let that asshole get to you.” 

 

Justin swallowed the nervous lump in his throat and glanced at the other faces surrounding him.  While some of them were noticeably confused and curious about the heated exchange that had just taken place, to his relief none of them seemed hostile or resentful regarding his presence there; in fact, they peered over at him with what appeared to be a combination of both interest and politeness. 

 

He took a calming breath and glanced at Daphne for further bolstering of his confidence before he turned to face the rest of the group gathered around him.  He exhaled, feeling just a little of the stress roll off his shoulders before he said professionally, “Shall we continue?”  As one of the doctors present began to present her ideas for the new department, Justin forced himself to listen to her and paste a professional look on his face, but inside his heart was pounding so hard he felt like it would burst from his chest.  Was there even going to be a need for the information they were gathering from this meeting?  When McKenzie finished his meeting with the other man, would there even _be_ a new art therapy department? 

 

Despite his previous vow from earlier, he found his thoughts wandering to Brian, who had steadfastly believed in him and helped to keep his spirits up through some of the darker periods in his life recently.  Right then and there, the only thing he wished was that he could feel Brian’s strong arms surrounding him protectively, and his voice murmuring soothingly in his ear that everything would turn out all right.  _Brian… I need you_ , he pleaded silently.  But as he stood there and forced himself to listen to the other members of the committee, he knew at least for now his wish would remain unfulfilled.


	18. Justice Over Intolerance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle between Swanson and McKenzie is waged and Justin's role at the hospital is resolved.

_Kinnetik – Same Time_

 

“Brian?  Silence.  “ _BRI… AN,_ ” a little louder.

 

From his position across from her at the conference table, Ted glanced over at Cynthia and arched his eyebrows in an unspoken question of _What’s up with HIM?_   Brian, who was sitting next to his assistant, was participating in their meeting as usual, at least in body anyway, for the past thirty minutes but he was noticeably preoccupied with something.  Normally during their weekly brainstorming sessions, Brian was at the top of his game, sparking numerous discussions about possible new businesses to pursue or succinctly critiquing his subordinates’ suggestions and ideas for new campaign pitches for current clients as his eyes bored into his employees’.  Today, though, their typically sharp-as-a-tack boss was almost absent-minded, temporarily forgetting the names of clients or even zoning out at times such as now.

 

Cynthia shrugged her shoulders at Ted before gently nudging Brian in the upper arm to get his attention.

 

Brian raised his eyes from their downward position to glance across the table at his employee, the characteristic smirk plastered back on his face.  “Yes, Theodore?” he asked, one eyebrow lifted as if he was questioning why he had been interrupted from his thoughts.

 

Ted sighed inwardly, expertly able by now to read Brian’s look of ‘ _don’t even ask’_ written all over his face.  Deciding not to call him on it for fear of being unemployed, he stated, “I was just saying that I crunched last quarter’s numbers yesterday for Kinnetik and net profit after expenses is up 23%  from the previous quarter.” 

 

Brian nodded as he played with the condensation on his water glass with one long index finger.  “Yay,” he said half-heartedly, not surprised actually; the company had secured two high-class, multi-million dollar accounts within the past few months so he would have been surprised if they _hadn’t_ shown a hefty profit from the previous accounting period.  “I guess you can all go out now and buy those new crayons you’ve been wanting.”

 

As everyone looked at him like he had grown a second head, he sighed softly, knowing in the mood he was in there was really no point in continuing their meeting any longer – he was too distracted to get anything productive out of it. “You kiddies are all dismissed,” he told his employees as he stood up and loosened the tie around his neck that was quickly beginning to feel like a constrictive noose instead.  “Now go make some _more_ money.”

 

The meeting’s participants stood there a little shocked that they were being dismissed from the meeting after only an hour’s time – normally these weekly feedback sessions lasted most of the afternoon – before Brian growled, “Shoo!” and they all rose from their seats to leave as if they were a flock of pigeons being startled in the middle of Times Square.  A few minutes later, Brian found himself alone with just Cynthia, who was gathering up the paperwork remaining there. 

 

“Everything okay?” she had the gumption to ask; after working for Brian for several years now, she knew her boss’s moods intimately, and it was obvious that he had something on his mind – something that was apparently not business-related.  “Gus doing okay?” she inquired, knowing that would be the one thing that would take precedence over any business here.  Last she heard he had been doing great, but not knowing much about meningitis, she wasn’t sure how likely relapses were to occur.  Had something happened to his son after he had been discharged?

 

Brian gazed up at her from his place at the table and finally shook his head as she stood there anxiously.  “No, he’s doing great,” he said quietly with a tender smile.  “He’s back in school and even playing baseball again.”

 

Cynthia nodded, frowning.  Well, if it wasn’t something to do with Gus, and Kinnetik business was going so well, what could it _be_?  She waited a few seconds to see if Brian was going to volunteer the real reason why he was so preoccupied today, but she realized there wasn’t going to be any more information apparently forthcoming as he returned his gaze toward his water glass and she was greeted with stony silence.  “That’s good,” she finally said, nodding, not really knowing what else to say.  “Give him my best,” she added, having met Gus numerous times before when he came to visit his father and be taken out to lunch on occasion.  Brian simply nodded a couple of times in response as, resigned, she picked up the rest of the papers left for the meeting and told him, “I’ll be at my desk if you need me, then.”  She eyed her boss once more curiously before, being the discreet assistant that she was, she turned and quietly left the room, closing the door behind her.

 

_What is WRONG with you, you asshole?_ Brian thought to himself as he heard the door close, bathing him in silence.  But he already knew what – or _who_ – the problem was.  He should have never fucked the living daylights of a certain fiery, blond spitfire last night who practically wore him out because now he couldn’t keep his mind on anything else except wanting to be with him again.  He knew everyone at the meeting, especially Cynthia and Ted, had to know something was going on, but he wasn’t about to admit that he was acting like some lovesick little faggot over his first crush. 

 

As he glanced at the nearby landline phone on the table, though, thoughts of how Justin’s day was going filtered through his mind and he thought fleetingly of picking up the phone and calling his cell number in hopes of reaching him.  He did want to know how his first day on his new job was going, but truthfully he just wanted to hear his voice.  He sighed; how did he get to this point of being so fascinated with another man?  He grimaced; he never thought that being kind to his son could be so damn sexy, but that had to have something to do with.  Of course, Justin was beautiful, inside and out, and quite intelligent, more than capable of holding up his end of any discussion they had.  And he was also creative, passionate, and full of life, all qualities that Brian found extremely attractive.  Plus, perhaps just as important, Justin’s sexual appetite was as insatiable as his, at least where the two of them were concerned; he smiled to himself as he recalled his lover had almost exhausted him as much as he had worn HIM out last night and this morning, too, before they had had to go their separate ways.  He liked to think that Justin was that uninhibited and passionate when he was only with _him_ , not choosing to even consider what sort of previous sexual encounters Justin might have had with other men, because he found himself jealous as hell at just the thought of it... 

 

Oddly enough, though, the most amazing part about Justin was his empathy and compassion for others.  Brian had seen it time and time again at the hospital, especially with Gus, and it was like some fucking aphrodisiac to him for some reason.  He sighed; he was truly and royally fucked, because he knew he would want Justin in his life for a long, long time.  He just didn’t know how much he wanted to admit that to Justin, admit just much he had come to care about him in such a relatively short time.  But he _did_ know a couple of things – Number One, he needed to make sure Justin realized how much he meant to him, and Number Two, he had to find a way to get the damned man off his mind while he was at work so he could continue to enjoy his stature as Pittsburgh’s top advertising executive.

 

First things first, though.  He picked up the receiver and dialed Justin’s cell number, waiting three rings before, to his profound disappointment, the call went into his voicemail.  He smiled as he heard the familiar, sweet voice of his lover speaking before he left his message.  “Hey, it’s me.  I was just wondering how your first day as Top Dog was going.  Call me if you get a chance and let me know, okay?  Oh… And how about dinner tonight at the loft to celebrate?  Let me know.”

 

As he replaced the receiver, he bit his lip thoughtfully for a few seconds before, flipping his laptop shut, he stood up from his place at the table and walked toward the door to open it.  It was time to get back to work for now.  _Show ‘em what you’re made of, Florence,_ he tried to telepathically project to his lover as he walked out of the conference room and back toward his private office.

 

 

 

Kelly looked up from her desk as her boss and the chief surgeon came stomping down the hallway from the conference room, no more than a minute after Swanson had stormed inside; she had imagined they would have verbally sparred in the same room where the new orderly-turned-art-therapy-assistant was presiding, but apparently for some reason they were going to hash things out in her boss’s private office instead.  She noted the strained expression and set jaw on the Chief of Staff’s face as Swanson trailed along right behind him.  She risked one glance at her co-conspirator as their gazes locked momentarily when he passed by; she twisted her mouth in a sort of expression that silently encouraged him before, with a curt, almost imperceptible nod to her McKenzie opened the door to his office.  “I do NOT want to be disturbed under ANY circumstances, Kelly, am I understood?” her boss told her as Swanson forcefully pushed his way past the other man and entered his superior’s private sanctum.

 

The redhead nodded silently, forcing herself to keep a neutral, detached expression on her face as McKenzie turned and followed Swanson inside, firmly closing the door behind him. 

 

 

The two men now safely alone in the confines of his office suite, McKenzie didn’t even bother with any niceties as he walked over behind his desk and whirled around to face the other man, choosing to remain standing as he braced his back up against the tall wall of windows overlooking the hospital’s rear grounds that were flush with mature shade trees and a large stone fountain depicting a mythical, female guardian angel with her hands outstretched – ironically enough, the same garden spot where he could envision Justin soon conducting some of his art therapy sessions with his patients.  “Sit down,” he commanded in a stern growl, leaving no room for any argument otherwise.

 

Swanson thought fleetingly of just remaining where he was, standing there rigidly in the middle of the other man’s office in an act of defiance and domination, but ultimately he slowly trod over to one of the dark-brown leather office chairs facing McKenzie’s desk and slowly sat down, his hands still folded over his chest as he stiffly sat in the chair. 

 

McKenzie stared down at him squarely in the face, his steely eyes boring into the other pompous ones as he braced his hands on the back of his chair, the normally tanned-looking flesh appearing white from how tightly he was gripping the leather; the veins bulged on his neck as he barked, “First of all, how _dare_ you barge into a private meeting uninvited!  This meeting had _nothing_ to do with your job and I don’t appreciate being interrupted and embarrassed in front of my hospital staff!” 

 

“Now hold on!” Swanson countered, his own ire boiling over immediately.  “It has _everything_ to do with my job as well as everyone else who works at this hospital!  Unlike you, I happen to be concerned with this hospital’s _reputation_!”

 

“What the hell, Swanson?  I’m Chief of Staff here – my utmost concern has been, and always will be, the financial strength and morale of this hospital, as well as its reputation!  Don’t insult me by insinuating otherwise.”  

 

Swanson snorted contemptuously as he glared up at the other man; who did he think he _was_?  If it hadn’t been for him agreeing to come here as Chief Surgeon, their status would have been relegated to a two-bit, second-tier facility.  Thanks to him, it had been elevated to a top-notch institution.  “If you _WERE_ looking out for this hospital’s welfare, you would have never in your right mind given that perverted fag a fucking _promotion!”_

 

McKenzie was astounded; he knew the man had been disturbed by Justin’s inappropriate display of affection by the elevators and in the children’s recreation room earlier, and he had actually agreed at the time that it was not proper conduct for _any_ employee, gay OR straight, to participate in such types of demonstrations where the public had easy access to the area.  But this was the first time such vulgar and vitriolic terms had escaped the other man’s lips so easily, and in that moment most – if not all – of the respect he had felt for this gifted, talented surgeon quickly disappeared as the man’s true colors surfaced.

 

“Don’t tell me how to do my job, Swanson!” McKenzie shouted, unable to hold his voice down now.  “And I don’t _ever_ want to hear such a bigoted phrase ever used again in my presence!  This hospital has always prided itself on its openness and tolerance of all creeds, races, and sexual orientation, whether it’s a patient OR an employee.  As a member of this hospital, you made a commitment to adhere to that policy, which I fully expect you to do!  What Taylor does in his spare time is none of your _business_!”

 

“It is if he’s conducting it in broad daylight in full view of the public,” the Chief Surgeon countered.  “So let me get this straight,” he continued, smirking at his unintended pun, “instead of exacting proper punishment for his actions you’re _rewarding_ him for his behavior instead?” Swanson couldn’t believe this was really happening.  Was this man fucking insane?  He rubbed his hands over his face vigorously in frustration, trying somehow to erase this horrible possibility from his mind, but he knew this was no dream; it was all too horribly real. 

 

McKenzie tried to take a deep breath to calm himself but found that he was failing miserably; for the past several years, he had had a problem with high blood pressure and was taking medication in an attempt to lower it, but it was almost as if he could literally feel the pressure rising each time the other man spoke.  He certainly could feel his heart racing as adrenalin shot through his body in reaction to the other man’s audacity and bigotry.  “Not that it’s any concern of _yours_ , Doctor,” he said icily, “but Taylor was appropriately disciplined for what he did.  The job I offered him – and he accepted – is totally separate from the temporary suspension that was handed out to him at the time.” 

 

Swanson was dumbfounded.  “How can you _SAY_ that, McKenzie? You don’t feel that offering him a new job – at a substantially-higher salary, I’m sure – and a position that was apparently especially created just for him would constitute a reward for what he did?  Are you that dense or just stupid?”

 

The Chief of Staff huffed out a furious breath.  “You may have technical skills that far outweigh those of most doctors, Swanson, but you are sorely lacking in _interpersonal_ skills!  May I remind you that _I_ am the Chief of Staff here, and as such I am responsible for administrative matters, NOT you?  YOUR job is to carry out the surgeries that are assigned to you and conduct aftercare on your patients, NOT dictate whom I can and cannot hire or promote!  And furthermore, if you cannot keep your venomous, bigoted feelings out of this hospital, I suggest that you find another facility that is more tolerant of your behavior!”  McKenzie felt he was going to be sick to his stomach if he had to look into the other man’s righteously-indignant face anymore as he turned to face the windows, peering down into the fountain below and trying to concentrate on the rushing water coming out of the angel’s hands, hoping for anything that might slow his heart rate down to a normal rhythm and lower his rapid breathing.  Something told him, though, that that wouldn’t happen until this man was out of his office.

 

“Excuse me?”  He heard Swanson respond behind him with a bark of laughter.  “You’re telling me you would choose that fairy over ME?  Are you crazy?  Well, I got news for you, McKenzie!  I’m not the ONLY one who doesn’t want immoral faggots being employed by this hospital.  Hell, your OWN assistant feels the same way!”

 

McKenzie whirled around in shock, noticing a flash of regret crossing over the other man’s face at his slip of the tongue.  “What did you just say?”  Surely he couldn’t have heard that right.  _His own assistant?_

 

“Nothing,” the other man uncharacteristically mumbled, his previous bluster quickly gone as he lowered his eyes and tried to squirm out of his outburst. 

 

“No, I heard you – you said _my own assistant_ felt the same way.  Are you talking about Kelly?”  He had only had his new assistant under his employ for the past few months, but she had seemed capable enough and had never really done anything to displease him.  She sometimes wasn’t the fastest typist in the world, and didn’t always arrive at work right on time, but for the most part she had handled her tasks proficiently enough.  How would Swanson even know WHAT she thought?  As far as he knew, the only contact they ever had was when he came into his office to meet with him or she called him on the phone to set up an appointment for the two of them.  He had to know for sure, though, if Swanson was really telling the truth or just trying to deflect some of the blame onto someone else.  “Answer me, damn it!  I asked you a question!  How do you know WHAT my assistant thinks?”

 

Swanson lifted his head to stare into the darkened orbs of his superior.  If HE was going down with the sinking ship, then so was she.  “She told me, McKenzie.  She’s my son’s girlfriend.  She’s the one who came down to my office while you were in your little art fairy meeting this morning to make sure I knew you were rewarding Taylor for his sordid behavior.  I couldn’t fucking believe you would DO that!  And neither could she.  _Someone_ has to save this hospital from yourself.”

 

McKenzie pursed his lips tightly together as he loomed over his desk and braced himself with his hands to stare unflinchingly down at the other man.  He was leaning in so closely now that he could feel the other man’s huffs of angry breaths washing over his face as he quietly said, “I don’t _need_ saving, Swanson.  And this hospital doesn’t need YOU.  If you can’t tolerate other lifestyles and keep your opinions to yourself, you don’t belong here.  You have two choices:  you can either submit your resignation to me no later than first thing tomorrow morning or I will announce your dismissal from this hospital’s employ then.  What’s it going to be?”  He knew he was taking a calculated risk letting this man go – after all, he had been instrumental in elevating the hospital to a more prominent stature since he had arrived – but he also knew he couldn’t afford to work with someone who held such a high degree of prejudice and intolerance.  The poison Swanson was spewing would only serve to seep into other parts of the hospital, making it a toxic environment to work in; the last thing he – and his patients and employees – needed was to be embroiled in such bitter hatred. 

 

The Chief Surgeon’s eyes narrowed into slits as he growled, “You wouldn’t dare.  I MAKE this hospital!”

 

McKenzie stared unblinking into his eyes as he quietly snarled, “No, YOU make this hospital ugly with your words of contemptuous venom!  This hospital doesn’t NEED your kind of holier-than-thou attitude!”  The younger man rose from his position behind his desk to stand tall and erect as he straightened the bottom of his suit jacket with his hands.  “Now… You have one minute to give me your decision, Doctor; if you choose to resign you will be paid the remainder of this year’s salary in keeping with your contract’s stipulations, but either way as of tomorrow morning you will no longer be considered employed by this hospital.”

 

Swanson was stunned as he shook his head in disbelief; the man really was serious about letting him go.  “You would fire me in favor of some inconsequential _orderly_ with jaded aspirations of being another Andy Warhol?” 

 

“Yes,” McKenzie verified as he let out a deep breath.  “I would, because I see something in that young man that you are sorely lacking in – compassion and understanding.  He represents the future of this hospital and why it will continue to thrive long after you’re gone.  He _cares_ about the patients, Doctor, in ways that you never will.  He will contribute something that might not be as tangibly apparent as one of your surgeries, but it will resonate in ways none of us may realize, and benefit this hospital for a long time to come.  There may be other employees here that secretly agree with your narrow-minded views, Swanson, but Taylor’s got the support of more people in this hospital than you know – including some very influential financial backers in addition to dozens of employees here – and I feel confident his supporters far outweigh the prejudiced, narrow-minded minority that includes yourself.  Now what’s your decision?  I have more _important_ matters to take care of this afternoon.” 

 

Insulted at the thought that he was being summarily dismissed, the man rose to his feet, still in shock that he was being discharged in favor of an inconsequential young man who had caused so much disruption in the hospital.  “Fine,” he told McKenzie, his hands on his hips.  “If this is the way you run this hospital, I no longer wish to work here anyway.  You’ll have my resignation on your desk tomorrow morning.” 

 

“Very well,” the other man replied coolly.  “Should we get any inquiries afterward, I will caution the human resources department what they can and cannot discuss with potential employers.”  He paused for a few seconds before adding, “I only wish we were at more liberty to be more truthful with them, McKenzie, because I don’t think you have any business working with the public in any capacity.”

 

Swanson actually smiled at the other man, his arrogant sneer back on his face.  “Well, fortunately for me that’s not for you to decide, is it, Doctor?”  He turned now to leave, walking over to the office door.  As he placed his hand on the doorknob, he faced the other man and said, “Good luck with your little fag art assistant, McKenzie, because you’re going to _need_ it.”  And with that he turned the door’s handle and yanked it open, the door banging against the wall roughly as he did so. 

 

Kelly looked up, startled, from her desk as the door opened; she didn’t have to strain her ears to hear what had been said; the raised voices coming from inside the office suite were quite coherent; in fact, they were so discernible that she knew her boss would be coming out of his office shortly to take care of another matter. 

 

“Thanks for throwing me under the bus, Swanson!” she hissed at the soon-to-be former Chief Surgeon as he glared at her.  “I’ll be sure to tell your _son_ all about it!”

 

The doctor paused at her desk long enough to snarl, “If you can’t stand up for what you believe in, then you _deserve_ the fucking unemployment line!”  He stared into her widened, apprehensive eyes before adding, “And just for the record, you never _were_ good enough for my son!”  He laughed at her softly in piteous contempt before stomping to the outer door and opening it to disappear from sight.

 

The young assistant took a deep breath as she saw a shadow appear out of the corner of her eye.  Lifting her gaze over to the private office doorway, she saw McKenzie staring at her in what looked like a mixture of anger and disappointment.  “Ms. Hutchins – I need a word with you.”

 

 

_Same Time – Hospital Conference Room_

 

“So we’re in agreement to hold the next meeting on Tuesday at 9:00 a.m.?” Justin asked the participants grouped around the large oval table.  A silent nod of everyone’s heads confirmed the time as he added, “Okay.  Well, if there aren’t any more issues, I guess that’s it for now.”  He took a calming breath, still not sure if there would even BE a need for another meeting; for all HE knew, he might no longer even have a job – as an art therapy assistant OR as an orderly.  He looked around at the faces grouped around him – some he knew, some he had never seen before – and was bolstered somewhat by their openness toward him.  All the men and women clustered around the table, whether they were highly-regarded surgeons, psychiatrists, therapists, or nurses, had all shown him respect for him through their suggestions and comments they had provided to him regarding ways in which to get the new art therapy department successfully off the ground.  Once the initial, awkward ice had been broken, and everyone had started brainstorming ideas and suggestions, he had found himself even more excited over the possibilities of how he could help their young patients deal emotionally with their afflictions.  He couldn’t wait to get started on implementing some of the ideas that had been presented.  He only wished he knew whether he was still going to get that chance.  How could he hope to compete against a renowned, powerful surgeon such as Swanson?  If the man pressed the Chief of Staff to let him go, could he realistically hope to prevail against someone such as _that_?

 

He noticed to his embarrassment that everyone was silently looking over at him now, apparently waiting for him to formally end the meeting.  He stopped for a moment to think of how strange it felt for him to actually be leading a meeting of such influential hospital employees when not too long ago he was just another orderly here before he softly said, “I want to thank everyone here for their input.  I am very excited to help get this new program implemented and I appreciate all your suggestions and for making me feel so welcome.  Thank you,” he repeated sincerely as he smiled back at them in gratitude.  This new job felt so right for him, so perfect; if only he would actually get the chance… “That’s all for today.”

 

As everyone scooted back their chairs and rose to leave, he found himself alone after a couple of minutes with only Daphne, who had remained seated in her chair in silent camaraderie long after the other meeting participants had left; needing to get back to the ICU, Cathy McDonald had squeezed his shoulders and smiled encouragingly at him briefly before she nodded and silently trailed after the other hospital personnel.

 

Justin took a deep breath before turning to look at Daphne and confiding in his friend, “I wish I knew what was going on.”  He sighed as he confessed, “I really want this job, Daphne.  I really think I could make a difference here.”

 

“You would,” she responded firmly.  “You already _have,_ Justin.  Don’t ever forget that, no matter _what_ happens.”

 

Justin placed his head in his hands, his shoulders sagging in worry.  “I just don’t know how I can compete again the Chief Surgeon.  Dr. McKenzie’s not going to risk upsetting him.  What would he have to gain by taking my side over his?” 

 

Daphne reached over and stroked her friend’s back sympathetically.  “Don’t jump to conclusions.  They were just going to talk, that’s all.  You don’t know what’s going to happen.”

 

“Daphne, he came bursting in here with his face red as a beet!  I don’t think you have to be a mind reader to know the man was royally pissed, and I don’t think there’s any question as to why.  I could read _get out, faggot_ loud and clear all over his face.”

 

The young resident bit her lip in sympathy; perhaps Justin was right.  It was going to be hard facing off against such a formidable foe.  But she had been here long enough to know that while McKenzie valued and admired Swanson’s skills and he had felt compelled to suspend Justin for a short time to maintain proper procedure, he still had the reputation of being a fair man; after all, he had been receptive regarding their concerns over Justin’s punishment and he had been open-minded enough to realize that her friend was the perfect choice for the new art therapy assistant.  She somehow knew the man wouldn’t just summarily discharge Justin just because the other man told him to; McKenzie did not come across as a pushover or he would have never become Chief of Staff.  “Justin, just because Swanson, who’s a homophobic prick by the way, is the Chief Surgeon doesn’t mean that McKenzie will take his side automatically over yours.  As Chief of Staff, his main job is to make sure the hospital functions properly and has the right people for the job.  He wouldn’t have offered you this new job if he didn’t think you weren’t qualified for it.  This job is just as important in its own way as Swanson’s, maybe more so in my opinion.” 

 

“I couldn’t have said it better myself,” Justin heard McKenzie say unexpectedly as he twisted around to see the Chief of Staff standing inside the open doorway; he could feel his heart began to race in apprehension as he stared into his superior’s face, unable to read his expression.  “Dr. Chanders, would you please excuse us for a few minutes?  I’d like to speak with our new art therapy assistant alone.” 

 

Justin licked his lips as he tried to wet them, his mouth suddenly feeling dry as dust; he looked at Dr. McKenzie hopefully, but was he reading too much into that statement?  Was McKenzie really trying to tell him that he still had the job?  He looked over at Daphne, who smiled at him encouragingly before she whispered, “I’ll talk to you later.”  He nodded as she rose to her feet to go.

 

“Dr. Chanders,” McKenzie acknowledged her politely as she walked by him.  He didn’t really know this young woman very well, but he had heard very positive things about her from her training mentor, Dr. Broderick, as well as the ICU head nurse, Cathy McDonald, two long-time associates of the hospital whose opinions he had a lot of respect for.  Realizing that she was supportive of Justin, it helped cement his opinion that this young man was worth fighting for and would continue to be an asset to the hospital.   

 

“Dr. McKenzie,” Daphne responded in kind; she turning around briefly as she left the room to look back inside as the Chief of Staff walked over next to Justin and pulled out one of the rolling leather chairs to sit down.  Taking a deep breath, she silently projected her good luck wishes onto her friend before turning back around and leaving, noticing the assistant’s desk now unoccupied. 

 

 

Justin eyed the Chief of Staff nervously as he sat down next to him, deciding to remain silent and let the other man talk first. 

 

The doctor smiled reassuringly at him as he asked quietly, “How did the meeting go?”

 

Justin frowned, not expecting his question.  “Uh… Fine,” he managed to stammer out.  “Everyone was generous about giving me some really good suggestions on implementing the program.”  Taking a deep breath, he added, “If there’s still going to BE a program.”  As he waited for McKenzie to reply, he couldn’t help thinking that the program could still function without _him,_ though...

 

McKenzie twisted his lips wryly as he smiled even more broadly now; he didn’t know if he was happier about Justin being the new art therapy assistant or finally getting rid of his soon-to-be _former_ Chief Surgeon.  “Oh, trust me, we’re definitely going forward with the program.  And with you as the lead.” 

 

Justin felt a tremendous weight lifting from his shoulders and his soul soaring.  “Me?”

 

The doctor huffed out an amused breath.  “Yes,” he told the other man firmly.  “YOU.  You were the key to getting it implemented in the first place, remember?  Mr. Barton agreed to the financing only provided that you were placed there to help get it off the ground.” 

 

Justin’s face fell a little as he considered whether McKenzie really had sufficient faith in him that he could do the job or he was simply sticking with him because of Barton’s financial backing.  “Is that the only reason?” he couldn’t help asking.

 

McKenzie winced; that hadn’t been his intention at all.  “It was part of it,” he couldn’t help admitting.  “But the seeds of the idea came to me when Barton visited my office initially to protest your suspension. When I received such glowing reports from him as well as many others about your artistic talent and your unique compassion and empathy for our patients, I simply put two and two together and came up with the idea for the new department.  I had been wanting to do something like this for a long time, Justin, and  Mr. Barton may have helped to start the ball rolling by agreeing to provide the financial means to make it a reality, but he didn’t come up with the idea; _I_ did, nor did he insist you be the candidate.  He was very happy to supply the means to make it happen, though, once I explained who I had in mind for the job.”

 

Justin nodded his understanding, letting out a heavy breath of relief.  There was still the matter of the offensive doctor, however.  “But what about Dr. Swanson?  I’m assuming he _was_ the doctor who reported me before?”

 

McKenzie nodded, impressed with the other man’s intuitive sense.  “Yes,” he verified.  “He was the person who reported you.”

 

Justin licked his lips nervously, rattled by the knowledge that his foe was a powerful Chief Surgeon of the hospital; he may have never met him in person, but he certainly knew enough about him through the grapevine, as well as through indirect exposure to him at the hospital when he was called in for emergency consultations in the ICU or when he visited patients after their surgery, to know who he was.  “I’m sure this new job is why he wanted to talk to you; I doubt that you managed to persuade him that I was the best person for it.”

 

The Chief of Staff shook his head sadly.  “No, we definitely could not come to a consensus regarding that.” He brushed his head through his hair restlessly and sighed.  “As much as I always hate to see an employee leave, I cannot justify employing someone who is bigoted and has no tolerance for different beliefs or lifestyles.  That goes against everything I want this hospital to stand for.” 

 

Justin’s breath hitched in his throat and his eyes widened.  “You… You _fired_ him?”

 

McKenzie shrugged his shoulders and smiled.  “It’s a matter of semantics.  I actually gave him a choice – resign or be dismissed.  He chose the more lucrative route of resigning, since he’ll get the rest of his salary for the current year as a result and will avoid any nasty questions regarding why he was let go in the first place.”  The doctor knew this information he was divulging probably breached the rules of employment confidentiality, but under the circumstances he felt that Justin was owed an explanation. 

 

Justin stared at him astounded; he chose _him_ over the surgeon?  “I… I don’t know what to say,” he murmured in disbelief.  He had never had anyone support him like this, except perhaps for Brian.  At the thought of his lover’s name, he suddenly realized that he had managed somehow on his own to persevere through his conference meeting without Brian being at his side.  But now that all the drama had settled down and the meeting was over, he suddenly felt this overwhelming need to see Brian, to touch him, to hear his soothing voice telling him that everything was really okay. 

 

He looked over at the Chief of Staff, full of gratitude and respect for what he had done for him but still desperately wanting for his first afternoon as the new art therapy assistant to be over soon so he could receive a balm for his heart that only one man could provide.  “I’m very humbled,” he told McKenzie sincerely, “and grateful for your confidence in me.  I promise that I won’t let you down.  I can’t begin to tell you what this opportunity means to me.”

 

McKenzie smiled as he stuck his hand out for Justin to shake.  As the blond gripped it firmly, he replied, “I know you’ll be great, Justin; you’ve got a big heart for these kids and that’s what this job needs, in addition to your artistic talent.  I have all the faith in the world that you’re the perfect person for this job.” 

 

Justin smiled as the Chief of Staff released his hand and stood up.  “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some paperwork to prepare for someone’s imminent departure, and a very busy schedule for the rest of the day, including finding a new assistant.”  At Justin’s lifting of his eyebrows in question, he smiled back at him and shook his head slightly.  “Long story.  Nothing to worry about.”  He paused for a couple of seconds before adding, “By the way, I’ll need a copy of your school schedule until your summer break, so I can work with HR to construct some working hours for you here at the hospital until you can work full-time.  You’ll still be able to do that once school is out for the year?”

 

Justin nodded.  “Yes.”

 

McKenzie nodded in return.  “Good.  If you’ll stop in my office tomorrow then, I’ll make sure you get a copy and we’ll go from there, okay?”

 

Justin smiled.  “Okay.  I get out of school around 2, so I can stop in tomorrow afternoon?”

 

“I’ll have it ready for you then,” he was told as McKenzie turned to go.  “See you tomorrow.” 

 

As the man quietly left a few seconds later, Justin let out a huge sigh of relief.  He felt bad that he had been put into the middle of a major headache for the Chief of Staff, but he was convinced the man did what he felt he had to do.  And most importantly of all, he felt confident that McKenzie chose him for the new job because he truly felt he was the best choice.  That made him feel so good. 

 

He smiled as he stood up; he couldn’t wait to tell Daphne what had happened – she was going to be so shocked!  But most of all, he couldn’t wait to see Brian again.  He needed his arms around him, holding him, loving him. 

 

Walking out of the conference room, he noticed McKenzie’s door closed and the assistant’s desk empty as he walked out into the hallway and toward the elevators.  As he entered the car and pushed the button to descend down to the lobby, he realized he still had his cell phone turned off; he had changed the mode to ‘silent’ when he had entered the conference room.  Flipping it open, he turned it back on, noticing he had one voicemail message. 

 

His heart swelled as he played back the message from Brian, wondering how his day was going.  _If you only knew, Brian_ , he silently answered as one side of his mouth lifted into a wry grin.  When he heard the rest of the message, though, asking him if he wanted to come to dinner at his loft this evening, his face broke out into a broad smile.  He couldn’t think of anyplace else he would rather be. 

 

_One quick cup of coffee with Daphne_ , he decided, as he reached the lobby and headed down to the ICU in search of her.  Then he would hurry back to his apartment to shower and change.  He supposed he should call Brian, though, to let him know he was okay.  He wasn’t quite sure how much detail to go into over the phone, however.  He had a feeling that if Brian knew what had happened this afternoon, he would be tempted to head over here and grind Swanson down to a bloody pulp if he could find him, and after everything that had happened, the last thing he wanted was another confrontational scene involving the two of them. 

 

Finding a relatively deserted alcove near the bank of elevators, he flipped open his phone and dialed Brian’s number. 

 

 

Brian reached over almost blindly for his phone as he scrutinized the latest art work regarding the Holmes Air account on his laptop; overall he was pleased with the design, but there was something not quite right about it.  “Yeah,” he answered casually as he continued to stare at the layout, wondering why it seemed askew.

 

“Hey,” he heard a soft voice say and his heart skipped a beat.  It was so fucking great to hear that sound.

 

“Hey to you, too,” Brian said to Justin, trying to sound nonchalant even though his pulse was racing just at the sound of his lover’s voice.  “How did it go?”  He thought Justin paused longer than necessary before he heard him say, “Okay.  I’ll tell you all about it when I see you.”

 

Brian frowned; he couldn’t quite place it, and he knew he hadn’t known Justin for very long, but he could still tell by his tone; things might have gone ‘okay,’ but there was still something amiss just the same.  “Justin?  What aren’t you telling me?”

 

He heard the blond sigh and he knew he was right.  “No, really… Everything’s okay,” Justin told him.  “I… I’ll fill you in on the whole thing when I see you.”

 

“Justin…”

 

“Don’t worry,” Justin told him, trying hard not to sound like a wimpy little sissy.  “It’s all right; _really_.”  Before he called Brian, he had told himself he was not going to concern him with what had happened; everything had turned out fine in the end and that was all that mattered.  As soon as he heard his lover speak, though, his conviction had begun to quickly falter; just hearing him over the phone made him want to see him even more.  “I’m going to run by the apartment, shower and change and I’ll meet you over at your loft later… If you still want to have dinner.”

 

Brian smiled tenderly into the phone.  “You bet I do,” he said softly. 

 

Justin’s heart did a flip flop.  He could almost see Brian smiling through the phone as he replied, “Good.  What time?”

 

“About six-thirty?”

 

“I’ll be there,” Justin told him.  “Later.”

 

“Later,” Brian whispered as he closed his phone shut.  His initial smile at Justin’s agreeing to come to dinner dissipated as he frowned in concern.  Despite what Justin had said, he knew something must have happened – he could tell.  He sighed, hoping whatever it was hadn’t been too traumatic.  He was determined to find out, though; tonight he would press the blond until he told him exactly what was bothering him.  He was determined to make their relationship work, which meant they had to be open with each other.

 

_How open are YOU being_? he couldn’t help asking himself.  He knew he cared for Justin deeply by now, more than he had ever felt for any man before.  And he knew he had managed to convince Justin that he wanted more than just a casual relationship with him; hell, just the realization that he was looking at them in that light was quite revealing to him.  Did Justin really know the depth of his feelings for him, though?  Perhaps more importantly, was he even willing to admit that to him aloud?  He bit his lip in contemplation; before, that question had never been an issue because he had never felt this way before about anyone.  This was all so new to him, so fucking bizarre in a way, but he _did_ know one thing:  he didn’t want to jeopardize what they already had; he only wanted it to move it forward.  He had already told Justin he was special; from his standpoint, that was _huge_.  But instinctively he _knew_ – Justin would need more than that, would crave more than that.  He felt everything so deeply, whether he was helping to make the hospital’s patients feel better, interacting with his co-workers, or being with him.  If it meant that he needed to move a little outside his comfort zone to keep Justin happy, then, he would.

 

Letting out a heavy sigh as he made a decision, he rose from his chair and grabbed his car keys from his desk.  Gathering up his laptop and the prototype visuals for the Holmes Air campaign, he determinedly walked to his office door and out into the hall.

 

His assistant raised his eyes to greet him as he walked up to her, her eyebrows lifted in surprise at his apparent imminent departure.  “Leaving?”  She knew he still had a couple of appointments left on his calendar for the day, but thankfully they were mainly follow-up appointments with a couple of minor-league, second-tier clients.

 

Brian nodded.  “Yeah, cancel the rest of my appointments and reschedule them, okay?  Something more important just came up.”

 

Cynthia nodded and waited until Brian had left before she smirked, wondering just what sort of ‘business’ needed such urgent attention and whether it was related to her boss’s absentmindedness earlier in the meeting.  There was no way the great Brian Kinney was actually smitten with someone, was there?  She shook her head at the absurdity of that notion; Brian Kinney in _love?_ “Yeah, right,” she said out loud softly.  “Maybe with himself.”  She laughed at her slight joke as she picked up the phone to do as her boss had asked.

 

 

_Thirty Minutes Later – Alleghany Children’s Hospital_

 

Brian stood leaning against his ‘Vette near the entrance to the parking garage, wondering if he had lost his mind.  He had managed to find a parking spot on the street where he could see each person coming and going from the main entrance to the hospital, including Justin, but the longer he stood the more ridiculous he felt.  What was Justin going to think?  That he couldn’t go more than a few hours without seeing him?  Was he on his way to growing a fucking pussy?  He rolled his eyes.  Maybe that was it; he was officially a lesbian now. 

 

No… He told himself.  It wasn’t that.  It was what Justin _hadn’t_ told him that was concerning him.  If he had felt like Justin was being totally upfront with him earlier about how things had went, he would have been more than content to wait until later to see him.  But he couldn’t help thinking that there was something Justin hadn’t told him; he hadn’t asked him to come here, but he felt he needed to.  He hoped to God he was wrong about his misgivings, but he had ultimately decided to take a chance that he wasn’t and come anyway. 

 

He was beginning to think that he might have unfortunately arrived too late to intercept Justin, wondering if he had left right away after they had spoken, when he saw the revolving doors turning and a familiar blond head emerging from the inside.  His heart skipped a beat as he recognized the beautiful face of his lover.  He was dressed professionally in a business casual outfit of an open-necked, button down deep-red dress shirt and a pair of linen, dark charcoal gray pants and black, polished shoes.  It was the first time that Brian had seen him dressed at the hospital in anything other than his typical white orderly’s uniform and it took his breath away.  He searched Justin’s face to discern any readily-apparent distress there, but to his relief he didn’t appear to be upset about anything, merely distracted somewhat. 

 

Brian was about to move from the side of his car to intercept him when Justin turned his head and locked his gaze on his.  He relished in the sight of his lover as Justin’s face expressed surprise, then pleasure and a broad smile broke out on his face, a smile that Brian couldn’t help returning. 

 

Justin couldn’t believe it; was Brian psychic?  How did he know that he needed him, that he couldn’t wait to see him again?  He quickly scanned the busy traffic, impatiently waiting until there was enough of a gap both ways before he hurriedly crossed the street to approach Brian, who was standing next to his car, his crisp, navy-blue dress shirt open at the neck and wearing a pair of dark gray suit pants; his jacket and tie were missing and his hair was slightly tousled from a stiff breeze that had unexpectedly arose that afternoon.  But to Justin he was the most gorgeous creature he had ever seen.  God, he was so glad to see him! 

 

Despite the trouble their previous encounters had caused, he couldn’t help rushing over and melting into his outstretched arms; he sighed as Brian’s arms slid around his waist and held him tightly against his lean, taut body.   His own arms wound around his lover’s back as he nestled his head under Brian’s chin.  He stayed that way for several seconds, feeling his stress draining way, until he pushed back gently from Brian’s body to stare up into the mesmerizing green and gold eyes.  “What are you doing here?” he whispered softly, reaching one hand up to lightly brush across the bronze skin at Brian’s neck. 

 

Brian reached up to gently grasp Justin’s hand and trap it between their chests as the blond wrapped his fingers around his palm in response.  Brian curled his lips under as he replied, “I thought the hospital’s newest executive might want a lift home; somehow the bus didn’t seem very appropriate for someone of your stature.”

 

Despite Justin’s vow to remain strong, he felt his eyes misting over in response to the tender tone in Brian’s voice.  Did Brian know how much he meant to him?  How much _this_ meant to him?  How did he know?  How did he know that he needed this right now?  That he needed _him?_ He swallowed the emotional lump in his throat and bit his lip in an attempt to not broadcast his feelings so openly, but as he watched Brian’s face sober in concern he knew he was losing that battle.

 

“Hey… Talk to me,” Brian whispered as he took his other hand and placed it under Justin’s chin to gently lift his face and force him to look into his eyes.  “What happened today that you didn’t tell me about earlier, Justin?”

 

Justin sighed.  “I… I don’t want to talk about it right now – not here.  I promise I’ll tell you.  It’s not a bad thing,” he assured him with a slight smile.  “Really.  It’s just been a very long afternoon; can we get out of here?”

 

Brian gently caressed his cheek with his thumb as he gazed into the soft blue eyes, wanting so badly to kiss him but knowing in light of what had occurred before that it might not be a wise move at the moment.  “Okay,” he agreed, not wanting to upset Justin any further; truthfully, except for the fact that this was where he had met Justin, he didn’t hold very fond memories of this hospital where his son had almost died.  “Let’s go.”  He reluctantly let go of Justin’s hand to let him walk around the car and get into the passenger seat before he joined him in the car.

 

As he pulled out of his parking space at the curb, he had to keep his attention on the road, but as soon as he had the car in gear, he reached over blindly toward Justin’s side and immediately felt his hand grasping his.  He stole a glance over at Justin briefly, finding his lover’s eyes locked on his; he saw a pink tinge of embarrassment appear on the blond’s face as he caught him gazing at him but Justin nevertheless smiled back at him.

 

“Do you want to just come back with me to the loft instead?” Brian asked him, holding his breath while he waited for his response.  “You can shower there.”  He stared over at his beautiful passenger for a couple of seconds longer before adding huskily, “You look hot in that outfit; you don’t need to change for _me_.”  In fact, if Brian had his way, Justin wouldn’t need any clothes at _all_ for the rest of the night…  

 

If Justin’s face was pink before, it was even darker now as he felt his face warming over Brian’s compliment and the velvety tone of his voice.  He smiled self-consciously before saying, “If you don’t mind.”

 

_Do I mind_? _Is he crazy?_ “Not at all,” Brian told him out loud with a smile.  “Suits me just fine.  We can order in some dinner if that’s okay.”  He kept his voice level, but inside he was doing somersaults.

 

Justin smiled.  “I’d like that,” he said softly. 

 

Brian nodded as he returned his attention to the road, feeling inordinately happy inside about Justin’s decision, but not giving a fuck that it was so normally unlike him.  He didn’t care at the moment, though, because damn it, he _liked_ this feeling.  “Good,” he said as he counted off the minutes until they were alone again, just the two of them.

 

The rest of the time was spent in companionable silence as Brian pulled up to his loft’s building and parked out front.  As the two men emerged from the car, it felt natural for the two of them to link their hands together again as they walked up to the front door.   Just before he punched in the security code, Brian decided he couldn’t wait any longer as he gently pulled Justin against his chest and pressed his lips to the soft, warm mouth.  Fingers intertwined together at their sides, he used his free hand to reach behind Justin’s neck and pull him even closer, turning his head to find just the right angle to deepen the kiss.  His tongue poked out to gently sweep across Justin’s lips, silently craving entrance; he sighed as Justin’s lips parted and he slipped his tongue inside to taste the sweetness hidden there. 

 

Justin tentatively echoed Brian’s actions, his tongue poking out to sample Brian’s mouth; the sensations Brian was evoking almost made him light-headed and dizzy, but it was a good kind of affliction.  He never ceased to marvel at how Brian made him feel.  It was as if the two of them were made for each other and he had been waiting for this man to come along to show him what love was really like.  _Love?_ Was that what this was?  Was that what this felt like?  Could he know for sure?  He hadn’t really had a lot of experience with other men to use as a barometer, but he knew one thing:  if it _wasn’t_ love, it was still the most wonderful thing that had ever happened to him…

 

“Brian,” he whispered softly in a choked up voice as they finally broke their kiss several seconds later and Brian held him tightly against his chest like a comforting security blanket.  “I… I’m so glad you came to get me.”

 

Brian cradled Justin’s smaller body against his.  “I knew somehow that you needed me,” he confessed, surprised at his own admission.  He had never bared his emotions to anyone like this before, but somehow with Justin it felt right.  “And I needed to see you, too, to know that you were okay.”

 

Justin pulled back enough to look up into Brian’s face, his own arms braced around Brian’s back.  “You did?” he whispered in pleased surprise.

 

Brian nodded, curling his lips under and feeling a little uncomfortable at baring his emotions.  “Yeah,” he said.  “It was important to me; _you’re_ important to me,” he added softly as Justin’s face broke out into a smile and his eyes glistened over his touching admission.  Feeling distinctly exposed by his confession, Brian leaned his forehead in to touch Justin’s, closing his eyes as he reveled in the feeling of holding this remarkable man in his arms.  He could hear his lover’s soft breathing and feel the warmth under his touch as they stood there together, oblivious to anyone or anything else while they temporarily managed to shut out the rest of the world.

 

Kissing Justin tenderly on the forehead, he pulled back to stare down into his eyes once more.  “Let’s go inside,” he suggested, wanting urgently to show Justin even more how much he meant to him.  Justin nodded silently as he placed his arm around Brian’s waist and the brunet punched in the four-digit code to enter the building’s interior.

 

They held hands all the way up in the elevator, Brian almost afraid to do more for fear they wouldn’t make it inside his loft before he ripped all of Justin’s dressy duds off his lithe body and rammed, rimmed, kissed, sucked and fucked every inch of him; the blood red of his shirt, open at the neck to expose the creamy-colored skin, was causing all sorts of delicious thoughts to invade his mind as he impatiently waited for the elevator to arrive on the fourth floor. 

 

Justin’s pulse was racing as Brian’s hand slowly crept higher to wrap his fingers around his wrist; as Brian’s thumb began to idly rub lazy circles over the inside of his wrist, his body instantly went on alert, including his dick.  He never realized how both ticklish and erotic such a simple action could be or that the tender flesh of his inner wrist could be an erogenous zone but he quickly discovered that it was as his heart began to race in response to the simple movement.

 

“Your heart is beating so fucking fast,” he heard Brian observe in amazement as he looked over and locked gazes with him. 

 

“It’s because you’re making me crazy,” the blond couldn’t help murmuring as Brian continued to rub his wrist sensually and looked at him in that certain, boyish way with darkened eyes that made Justin so fucking aroused that he could hardly stand it; that and the knowledge of what those skilled hands and lips could do to his body in short order.  The tip of his tongue snaked out briefly to wet his dry lips, his entire body feeling like it was about to explode from desire.

 

Brian had told himself he was going to strive for a little control, knowing that something was bothering Justin that he needed to talk about, but he was quickly losing the battle with himself with every passing second that went by; Justin’s tongue flicking out delicately to wet those soft, plush lips and his telling him that he was making him crazy wasn’t helping, either, because he felt the exact same way about _him_. 

 

“Better watch what you say, Mr. Taylor,” he warned the other man.  “Or we won’t make it off this elevator.  You’re not the ONLY one going crazy here.”

 

Justin’s face turned a deep shade of red as thankfully, the primitive elevator slowed and then stopped on the top floor.  He sighed in relief as Brian dropped his hand to pull the metal doors of the elevator cage back and stepped outside, the blond following closely behind him.  Brian looked back at him in amusement, knowing precisely the inner turmoil he was going through.  He had a feeling that their ‘dinner’ might just have to wait until later…

 

As he pressed the four-digit code to swing the loft’s door open and allow Justin to enter, he indulged in a little ass-watching briefly as he stood just inside the loft, admiring the way Justin’s dress pants clung to every delicious curve of his backside; _damn, that outfit was downright dangerous_.  “Something to drink?” he asked as Justin turned around from his place near the couch.

 

“Beer?” he suggested as Brian nodded and walked over to the refrigerator to retrieve two bottles. Twisting the two caps off and throwing them in the trash, he walked over to hand one to his guest, their hands lingering longer than necessary as they touched. 

 

“Sit down,” Brian encouraged him as Justin slowly lowered himself onto the couch.  Brian joined him soon after, propping his long legs up on the glass coffee table as he took a swig and glanced over at Justin.  “So you want to tell me what happened today?” he asked softly as he held the frosty bottle in his hand.  He didn’t want to push Justin too hard to reveal what had been bothering him, but he figured the sooner he found out and could hopefully fix it, the sooner they could move onto much more pleasurable pursuits.

 

Justin reached over and placed his beer bottle down on a coaster lying on the coffee table and sighed.  “It was nothing, really,” he began as he restlessly pushed one hand through his hair. 

 

Brian laid his own bottle down next to Justin’s and reached for his hand.  “Sorry,” he said with a smile as Justin jumped a little at the coldness of Brian’s hand that had been transferred from grasping the beer bottle.  “You know that’s bullshit, Justin!” he gently chided him.  “You were obviously upset about something earlier.  Just _tell_ me what it was.”

 

Justin bit his lip for a few seconds, wondering why this was so hard; everything had turned out okay, so why was he making such a big deal out of it?  As he looked into Brian’s concerned eyes, he knew he really had nothing to worry about.  He supposed it was just because he feared that Brian would somehow blame himself for what had happened today, and that would be wrong; what had happened before to get him into trouble had involved _both_ of them, and he had willingly consented to it.  He knew he still had to be totally honest with this man, however; he wanted a long-term relationship with Brian and starting out with secrets would only harm that goal, not help it.  He let out a breath before he replied, “I found out who reported our liaisons to the Chief of Staff.”

 

Brian couldn’t help smiling a little even considering the seriousness of their subject.  “ _Liaisons,_ Florence?  You make us sound so _decadent!”_  

 

The indignant look on Justin’s beautiful face was priceless as he tried to snatch his hand away in annoyance, but his companion was too strong for him and it remained firmly trapped inside the other man’s grasp.  His eyes flashed as he exclaimed, “Brian, please, I’m trying to explain what _happened_ here!”

 

Brian made a motion with his free hand to indicate he was zipping his lips shut together as Justin nodded, satisfied that his lover would remain silent while he explained what had happened at the meeting.

 

“Well, I arrived at the meeting a few minutes before it was scheduled to start,” he began calmly.  “There were a few people I recognized, like Daphne – Dr. Chanders – and Cathy McDonald.  Remember her?  She was the head nurse down in the ICU when they brought Gus in.”  Brian nodded silently as he continued to stroke Justin’s head reassuringly. 

 

Justin nodded in acknowledgement.  “Well, that made me feel a little better when I identified some familiar faces.  And everyone else seemed very open and welcoming, including Dr. McKenzie, at least for the first few minutes of the meeting.”

 

Brian wanted desperately to reply to that ominous statement but wisely chose to remain silent, knowing that Justin would provide him with the rest of the story when he was ready.  He watched his lover take a few breaths before he started again.

 

“Well, we were about to get started when all of a sudden, the door burst open and this imposing man stormed in with his face as red as a beet!  Even though I had never met him before officially, I still recognized him as Dr. Swanson, the Chief Surgeon at the hospital.  I was wondering at first what he was doing there, because he doesn’t have anything to do with mental health issues, but then he pointed at Dr. McKenzie and demanded to talk to him right away.”

 

Brian’s eyes widened at that disclosure; the Chief Surgeon was the one who had reported him and Justin?  That certainly explained why McKenzie had come down so hard on Justin initially, at least regarding the speed at which he had exacted his ‘justice.’  So the Chief Surgeon was a homophobe?  _Lovely_ …

 

He _did_ speak up, then, just enough to say softly, “Go on, Justin.”

 

Justin licked his lips nervously before he continued.  “Well, McKenzie led him out of the room down to his private office; it was obvious he was extremely pissed at Swanson for disturbing the meeting and when he left he told me to go ahead without him.”

 

Brian studied Justin’s face, his eyes darting rapidly back and forth sideways like they normally did when he was concentrating intently on something.  “And did you?”

 

Justin smiled slightly as he nodded affirmatively.  “It felt a little weird being the one conducting such an important meeting with all those doctors, therapists and nurses in attendance, but yeah, I did.  And everyone was great about it!  They all came up with some fantastic suggestions as to how to get the program started and make the most productive use out of it!”

 

Brian smiled as he noticed Justin’s voice rising animatedly as he described the meeting; he could tell Justin had made the right decision in choosing to remain at the hospital.  It was obvious how excited he was about this new job, and it would have been wrong to deprive the facility – and the patients – of someone with so much artistic talent and empathy toward others.  “Good for you,” he murmured approvingly as Justin beamed back at him. 

 

Brian watched, though, as Justin’s face clouded over a little.  “What?” he asked quietly.  “You told me everything is okay.  It is, isn’t it?”  Had Justin merely skimmed over what had really happened earlier, afraid that Brian would think less of him somehow?  “Justin?”

 

He watched as the blond shook his head, not sure, though, what that signified as he waited a little anxiously for Justin to continue.  “Well, after the meeting was over – it lasted about an hour – I stayed back with Daphne to talk to her a little, because I was really worried that Swanson was going to make things difficult for me, and even demand that I be replaced before I even had a chance to begin.  I mean, the man had to have a lot of influence there in his position.” He snorted softly.  “So all the time I was leading that meeting, I kept worrying that maybe I was conducting it all for nothing.  That I wouldn’t even _have_ a job by the time Swanson got done talking to Dr. McKenzie.”

 

Brian bit his lip, unable to read from Justin’s serious expression exactly what happened.  He sighed after Justin remained silent just a little too long.  “Justin… You’re _killing_ me here!  So what happened?”

 

His heart began beating again as he watched Justin’s face radiant with a brilliant smile; God, what a blinding smile it was, too!  He told him triumphantly, “Dr. McKenzie came back after he was done talking to Swanson to tell me that he had given him an ultimatum to either offer his resignation tomorrow or he would be _fired_ , so the fucker decided to resign so he could collect the rest of this year’s salary.  Can you _believe_ it, Brian?  He chose me over HIM!  The Chief Surgeon!  God, do you know what kind of feeling that gives me?” 

 

Justin’s smiling face was contagious as Brian smiled warmly back at him, so thankful that McKenzie had had the balls to do what he should have done; stand up against bigotry and intolerance and support this incredible, amazing man.  “Yeah, I think I have an idea,” Brian laughed as he pulled Justin into his arms and hugged him tightly.  “I’m so fucking proud of you, Florence!” he teased him as Justin laughed in delight.  “And I’m so glad everything worked out for you!” 

 

He pulled back to see Justin’s eyes shining with such happiness and his whole face glowed.  It was stunningly mesmerizing as he leaned in to kiss those warm, soft inviting lips once more.  They remained locked together for several seconds until finally they had to separate slightly for air, both breathing form the exertion. 

 

Brian brushed some hair back from Justin’s face tenderly as he said, “Looks like we _really_ have something to celebrate tonight, then – your new job and the ouster of a total asshole at the same time.”  He leaned in to nuzzle Justin’s neck as he whispered, “Do you get a private office to go with that new job?”

 

Justin giggled.  “I don’t know, actually,” he responded with a smile as he leaned back to gaze into Brian’s eyes.  “But let’s not press our luck just yet, okay?”

 

Brian’s mouth twisted up in amusement.  “Yeah… Okay.  I’ll wait until you’re at least broken in.”  He sighed in relief, so glad that everything had worked out.  He was still a little disappointed that he wouldn’t have the opportunity to see Justin at work on a daily basis, but he knew that Justin was happy with his decision and that was what was most important.  He knew, too, that the hospital was where Justin belonged.  He reached over to give Justin a quick peck on the cheek before standing up.  “Well, I’ll go order us some dinner, then,” he told his companion.  “Why don’t you go take your shower?  It’ll probably be here by the time you get out.”

 

Justin nodded as he stood up. Just before he turned to go, he paused.  Brian’s eyebrows lifted up in a silent question as the blond said, “Actually… I always have trouble reaching around to scrub my back,” he said coyly.  “You think maybe you could help me with that first?”

 

Brian licked his lips and grinned as his eyes raked down and then up Justin’s body, so deliciously encased in his silky, blood-red shirt and tight, charcoal-colored pants.  “Yeah… I think I can handle that if you _reciprocate_.”

 

Justin grinned.  “Deal.  You first.”


	19. Lay My Heart Open - Story Conclusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian and Justin find a unique way to entertain Gus at the loft before his father is confronted with revealing his true feelings for his favorite blond.

_Two Months Later – Mid-August_

Justin glanced up from his place on the curved, cement bench near the courtyard’s fountain to see a familiar face rushing up to him; his face broke out into a delighted smile as Maria Barton promptly fell into his open arms and wrapped her cocoa-skinned arms around his neck.  “Justin!” she cried out as the blond returned the embrace and laughed in joy at the look of happiness on her face. 

 

The two broke off after a few seconds as Justin gazed down into her sparkling brown eyes; her black hair, which was always her shining glory, was pulled back into a loose, care-free braid behind her head and she had two glittery lime-green barrettes on either side of her head to match her yellow and green sun dress. 

 

“Maria, you look so beautiful!” he complimented her as she beamed a bright smile at him.  “How are you feeling?”  He gently grasped her upper arms as she looked into his face; Justin was overwhelmed by how healthy and robust she seemed.  It was quite a departure from the pale, wan face he had seen right after her previous heart surgery.  He didn’t need to be a physician or have any medical expertise to know that the radical, experimental surgery that had been performed on her had obviously done the trick.  She looked wonderful and just like any other healthy 10-year-old should look.

 

“I’m doing great, Justin!” she said, her face lit up.  “I’m starting fourth grade next month!” 

 

Justin grinned back at her.  “That’s wonderful, Honey!  You caught up already?”  He knew she had been having problems keeping up with her school work around the time she had needed the surgery; he wasn’t surprised, though, with how smart Maria was that she had managed to catch up sufficiently with the rest of her classmates to enter the proper grade in the fall.  “I knew you could do it!”

 

“Thanks largely to you,” he heard a male voice say behind her.  He glanced up to see her father, Daniel Barton, walking up to join them.  He smiled at Justin warmly, explaining, “She was so excited at the chance to see you again that she got away from me out in the lobby.” 

 

Justin let Maria go as he stood up and shook Barton’s outstretched hand.  “It’s good to see you again, Sir,” he said politely.  “How did you know where I was?”  Justin was glad to see Maria’s father again; he knew how instrumental this man had been in setting up the new art therapy program, a fact that he would be eternally grateful for, and he had been wanting to thank him personally; in the last two months since the program had begun, he had never felt so fulfilled and happy about his work than he did now.  Word had quickly spread throughout the hospital and doctor office affiliates about the program and how much success they were having with quicker recuperative periods as well as improved patient morale; in short order, every spot in the program had been presently filled.  In fact, Dr. McKenzie was so pleased with the results and positive PR that had been generated that he was looking to hire a second art therapy assistant to help part-time when Justin had to return to school in about a month.  He had assured him, however, that the program would still be under his auspices and he would still be meeting regularly each week with all the committee members to keep the program flourishing.  He had already received his 60-day provisional evaluation last week and had been delighted as well as flattered that McKenzie was so happy with the program’s progress that he had given him a $1.00/hour raise already.  Plus, there was the added bonus of having the frequent company of a sexy brunet now; he and Brian spent most evenings together, whether it was staying in at the loft watching a movie, playing pool at Woody’s with Brian’s friends, visiting the diner or some other restaurant for meals, or going clubbing.  They even occasionally took Gus out with them to the amusement park, ball games, or the zoo, and Justin found himself falling in love with the precocious, full-of-life miniature version of the man that he also loved. 

 

Yes, Justin realized by now that he _did_ love Brian.  He had never really had a lot of experience with actually being in love; in fact, he figured he had never really been in love before at all.  He didn’t have to have had prior experience with it to know that this was the real deal, though.  Of course, they had been enormously physically attracted to each other from the start – after all, Brian was one sexy, gorgeous male specimen and knew exactly what to do to provide him with the utmost in pleasure.  (In fact, he could feel his face heating up just at the thought of exactly what the man could do to him and how he could make him feel).  But he knew this was much more than just an exquisite physical draw.  He knew it each time Brian looked at him so tenderly with that soft smile of his.  He knew it each time Brian texted him at least once each day to tell him he was thinking about him (in between the messages about what he wanted to do with him later; those remained firmly out of sight of anyone else).  He knew it each time Brian made love to him, in the way he touched him and kissed him, in the way he feathered his fingers through his hair or moaned out his name in the heights of ecstasy.  He knew it each time Brian picked him up from work (even though he had never asked him to), finding a bag of just-baked, still-warm chocolate-chip cookies from his favorite bakery on the passenger seat, despite Brian insisting he could gain weight just from smelling them.  No, he had to admit, Brian had never come out and actually _told_ him that he loved him, but he really didn’t feel he had to; he just knew.  And he knew he felt the same exact way, because his heart actually physically ached when they were apart and he couldn’t imagine his life without Brian in it now. 

 

He forced his attention back to his guests as Barton explained, “I went upstairs to your office and when I noticed it was locked with a note you’d be back in an hour, I called Dr. McKenzie on my cell and he told me you frequently came out here for your lunch hour.  Fortunately, you didn’t divert from your normal schedule today, or Maria would have been vastly disappointed to have missed you.”

 

Justin nodded with a smile as he saw Maria’s father reach out and place a loving hand around her slim shoulders.  Justin had been given the opportunity when Maria was in the hospital before to engage in some conversations with her father while she was battling complications regarding her heart defect, enough to know that this was his only child and he loved her dearly; he and his wife hadn’t been able to conceive a child and they had ultimately adopted Maria from Guatemala when she was just a newborn, not realizing that she suffered from a congenital heart defect until later – after they had fallen hopelessly in love with her bright, chocolate-colored button eyes and sleek, shiny dark hair.  As he looked over at her, he couldn’t get over how great she looked – her skin glowed with rosiness and her eyes were shining with joy; it made his _own_ heart leap in response. 

 

“I really enjoy sitting by the fountain when the weather’s nice,” he  explained to his visitors as he glanced over at his open sketchbook.  “It’s very peaceful out here and I normally get some inspiration for some of my drawings.”

 

Barton nodded.  “Mind if we join you for a few minutes?”

 

“Not at all,” He instantly responded, walking over and sitting back down on the bench as Barton and his daughter joined him on the adjoining one.  “Actually, I’m glad to see you.”  He licked his lips a little, suddenly nervous at facing the man who had helped provide him with the means for a job that he truly treasured.  _How do you express in words exactly how much that means to you_?  Not very many people could say that they loved what they did for a living and looked forward to coming to work each day, but he did; every day he had the chance to work with the children that he loved and to actually make a difference in their lives.  That, along with finding a man who he loved along the way, was the ultimate definition of happiness and Justin was one very happy man indeed.  “I wanted to thank you for your help in getting the art therapy program implemented.  Dr. McKenzie told me what you did; I’m sure without your support, none of this would have been possible, and it’s already having such a positive effect on the patients here.”   He couldn’t help the enthusiasm from arising in his voice as he added sincerely, “And I love what I do, Mr. Barton.  I really do.  And it would have been impossible without your help.”

 

“First of all, it’s Daniel, Justin.  And second of all, I was more than happy to help when Dr. McKenzie told me what he had in mind.  You were the perfect person for the job; McKenzie agreed with me when I spoke to him earlier today.  He is so impressed with what you’ve accomplished so far, and was justifiably effusive in his praise for both your work ethic and compassion.”  Justin blushed at the compliments as he added, “Of course, that wasn’t a surprise to me.  I already saw that in action when you helped take care of Maria.”  Barton squeezed his daughter’s shoulder and planted a brief kiss on her forehead as the little girl smiled lovingly back at him.  “Your willingness to help her feel better and keep her mind off her troubles, as well as going above and beyond what your duties called for meant more to me than I can ever say.  That was worth everything to me.” 

 

Justin smiled, touched by the other man’s words of praise.  “I’m just glad that she’s doing so well now,” he told the other man humbly.  “That’s payment enough.”  He grinned.  “But I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t love the new job that I have as a result.  Thanks again.” 

 

Barton nodded.  “You’re welcome.”  He felt a slight tug on his maroon-colored golf shirt as Maria strove to get his attention.  “Yeah, Honey?”

 

“Can I give Justin his present now?”

 

Her father nodded as Justin eyed them curiously.  _Present_?

 

“You sure can,” he told her as she unzipped a small, pink backpack that she had slung across one shoulder and reached inside to retrieve a narrow, black cardboard box.  “This is for you,” she said a little shyly.

Justin’s eyes lit up with pleasure.  “For _me_?” he asked.  “How thoughtful of you!  But you didn’t have to get me anything.”  He looked over at her father.  “You already got me much more than I ever thought possible.” 

 

“It’s just a little congratulatory gift for your new job,” Barton explained as Justin accepted the box and held it in his hands.  “Maria wanted to get you something to say thanks for what you did for her, and I came up with a suggestion that you might be able to use.”

 

Justin smiled as he slowly lifted the box to reveal a silver name holder for his desk with his name written in flowing script across the front.  His eyes teared over slightly as he ran the fingers of his left hand lightly over the embossed letters.  “It’s beautiful, Maria,” he whispered as he gazed over at the little girl, who beamed at the praise.  “This will look great on my desk.  Thank you, Sweetheart.”  He lightly grasped her upper arm and leaned over to plant a brief kiss on her cheek as she smiled back at him shyly. 

 

“I’m glad you like it,” Barton told him with a nod.  “You ready to go, Honey?  I imagine Justin needs to get back to his office soon.” 

 

“Yeah,” Justin told them regretfully.  “I need to get back – my next patient session is in fifteen minutes.”  He stood up to go as his visitors joined him.  Reaching out his hand to shake the other man’s, he said, “Thank you again for all the support, Daniel.  I’m very grateful.” 

 

“Just keep doing what you’re doing, Justin, and don’t lose those special qualities you have that make you stand out from all the others.  No amount of money infused into a hospital or even medical expertise can replace that; _that_ is what will continue to make this hospital – and the new art therapy department – such a great success.  I hope, by the way, that you will consider making your job here permanent once you graduate from PIFA.”

 

Justin smiled.  “I’d like that,” he said.  “I can’t think of a more perfect job that blends two things that I love so well together.  I’m hoping Dr. McKenzie will suggest that when the time comes.”

 

“Well, if he _doesn’t_ , I will,” the other man told him adamantly.  “But the Chief of Staff is not a fool; he’ll figure it out,” he said with a smile.  “Give Justin a hug, Honey, and let’s go.”

 

“Bye, Justin,” Maria said against the blond’s chest as he gathered her up in his arms for another hug.  “Can I come and see you again?”

 

Justin grunted a little as he gave her a firm squeeze before letting her go.  He smiled at her as he said, “You sure can.  Let me know the next time you’re coming and I’ll go out for some more ice cream down the street.”  Just like with Gus, Justin had made a special trip down the street on his own time when Maria had been hospitalized to find some peppermint ice cream that she especially loved.  It had taken him two ice cream stores before he had found any, not exactly being plentiful out of season, but he hadn’t stopped looking until he had a pint of it in his hands.  The look of surprised pleasure on her face later when he had surprised her with it had bonded them together permanently as friends forever and had made his extra effort totally worthwhile.

 

As if right on cue, Maria’s eyes lit up as she asked, “Peppermint?”  Justin nodded as she let out a whoop.  “Can we come back next week, Daddy?”

 

Barton and Justin laughed.  “Let’s give Justin a little more time on his job before we do that,” Barton told her as his daughter’s face fell just a bit.  “But when we DO come back, I’ll take all three of us out for both ice cream AND pizza.”  He didn’t spoil his daughter too frequently with fast food, he and his wife normally choosing for her to eat healthier, cooked-at-home meals.  But occasionally when the event warranted it, he did allow her to imbibe in some good, old-fashioned fattening foods that she loved, including two of her favorites, ice cream and pizza.  He figured this would definitely merit one of those times.

 

His daughter’s face lit up with anticipation as she jumped lightly up and down.  “Yay!  Okay, Daddy.  Don’t forget, though!”

 

He laughed as Justin grinned.  “I won’t, Honey, I won’t.”  Taking her hand, he turned to go.  “Take care, Justin, and keep up the great work.”

 

Justin nodded with a grateful smile as the two slowly walked back toward the hospital’s rear entrance, their hands swinging companionably between them.  Scooping up his sketchpad and his new name holder, he followed along behind them, mentally preparing himself for the rest of the afternoon’s therapy patients.

==================

_Six O’clock – Brian’s Loft_

 

Justin swung the door to Brian’s loft open and was immediately assaulted by a wonderful aroma, along with the sounds of pots and pans clanging.  If he didn’t know better, he would swear it smelled just like Debbie’s homemade spaghetti sauce, one of his favorite foods; he could detect the wonderful scent of freshly baked garlic bread, too, that much he was sure of.  He knew there was no way that Brian had actually _cooked_ something; in the short time he had known him, the man had proven without a doubt that he could _not_ cook anything more complex than toasting wheat bread; the two times that Justin had asked Brian to simply heat up some leftovers in the oven from meals he occasionally cooked for them, Brian had managed somehow to burn them both times.  He had claimed the first time that the oven was somehow faulty, but after the second go-round, Justin had to face the truth that Brian simply couldn’t be trusted around any heating devices except for the warming massage oils they sometimes used during their foreplay.  It was best, then, that his – _dare he say it_? – _boyfriend_ not attempt any more cooking.  “Brian?” he called out tentatively, not quite sure what he was walking into.

 

His face lit up as a blur of brown hair and long legs came running out of the kitchen to greet him.  “Jus’n!” Gus screamed in glee as he crashed into his thighs; it was all Justin could do to keep in place and upright as he placed one hand on the top of Gus’s head to steady himself.

 

“Hey, Buddy!” he exclaimed as he looked down into the animated face of Brian’s son.  “What a great surprise!  What are you _doing_ here?”  He tousled Gus’s hair affectionately as he placed his portfolio down next to the door and scooped the child up into his arms.  He walked into the kitchen in search of the boy’s father, hearing the clattering of pans becoming louder as he did so. 

 

His eyes locked onto the hazel ones of his lover as Brian smiled over his shoulder at him; he was wearing a form-fitting, black sleeveless collared shirt and a favorite pair of designer jeans as he stood there in his bare feet, slowing stirring something on the stove with a wooden fork; another pan containing spaghetti sauce was being warmed nearby on a back burner.  “I was about to fake an illness and summon an ambulance to go fetch you, Florence,” he told Justin.  “I thought you said Daphne was going to bring you home.”

 

Gus didn’t even blink an eye at Brian’s unusual name for Justin; his father had used it so often by now that he figured it was his middle name or a title by now.  It still confused him, though; first his name was Orly, then Justin, and now Florence?  He shrugged his shoulders as Justin gently lowered him to the ground and he scampered off toward the living room where his toy trucks were currently resting in front of his father’s massive, floor-to-ceiling windows on top of a green-colored, portable vinyl mat that had roads drawn on them to resemble a highway.  A tub resting nearby that was typically used to hold kitty litter was filled with play sand for him to scoop into his favorite truck, a yellow, Tonka front loader.  Brian had reluctantly permitted Justin to set it up for Gus to play with when he came to visit, provided that:  A) it was lying on top of two jumbo-sized, plastic garbage bags at all times, and B) the truck remained inside the ‘loading pit’ when in use.  So far to Gus’s credit, he had managed to adhere to those rules, but Brian still kept a wary eye on the sand pile just the same, not wanting to entertain the dreadful notion of trying to remove sand from the cracks between his hardwood floor planks. 

 

 

Not to Justin’s surprise, before he had a chance to explain why he was late Brian yelled out to Gus, “No playing with the sand until after dinner, Sonny Boy!”  Justin smiled as his lover’s command was met with several seconds of silence.  “Gus?”

 

“Just for a little while, Daddy?”

 

“NO, Buddy!  You can play with your other trucks until after dinner!  I don’t want any sand on the floor, okay?  You’ll either have to wait or I’ll have to put it away.”   Brian was actually the big softie when it came to his son and issuing discipline; Mel was the one with the iron fist in the family, with Lindsay somewhere in between.  Brian fucking hated to be stern with Gus, but when the occasion warranted it, he forced himself.  He waited for a couple of seconds until he finally heard a resigned voice say grumpily, “Okay, Daddy.  I’ll wait.” 

 

“Good boy,” Brian called out.  “Dinner will be ready in about ten minutes, as soon as the spaghetti is done.”  He turned to Justin to answer his unspoken question.  “Give me a break, Florence – I can fucking handle cooking spaghetti,” he told him indignantly.  “I’m heating Debbie’s leftover sauce I got out of the freezer.”

 

Justin held up his hands as if in surrender before he walked up to Brian next to the stove and wrapped his arms around the other man’s chest from behind.  “I’m sure you can handle it,” he told him soothingly over his shoulder, although silently he still wasn’t convinced.  “Daphne got called away on an emergency,” he told him in explanation.  “I had to wait for the bus to show up.”

 

Brian put the wooden fork down and turned around in Justin’s arms to wrap his own around the slender waist.  He gazed into the soft blue eyes for a moment before chiding him, “Why didn’t you call me then?  I would have picked you up on the way home.”  Kinnetik was fortunately fairly close to the hospital, so as his schedule permits Brian secretly enjoyed the times when he and Justin’s schedule meshed enough so he could pick him up; his lover’s typical, excited, nonstop chatter about his job and what had happened during his day oddly helped to relax him after he had had a stressful day himself – that and a few passionate kisses in the car when Justin first climbed into the passenger seat helped, too; he liked to think of it as a whispered prelude of what was to come later. 

 

“I didn’t find out until you would have already left,” he told him.  “It wasn’t a big deal.” 

 

Brian looked lovingly into his eyes for a moment before he couldn’t resist leaning down to touch the soft, full lips with his.  Only the rapid bubbling of the spaghetti Brian was cooking on the stove caused Justin to break off their kiss.  “Brian,” he said breathlessly as he placed his hands against the firm chest; a pair of sensuous lips roaming all over his neck was making it had to formulate actual words.  “The stove… Something sounds like it’s about to overflow,” he finally managed to utter.

 

“I know the feeling,” Brian murmured as he continued to nuzzle the soft flesh of Justin’s collarbone, relishing the unique sweet/salty taste that could only belong to one very special man.  Eventually his lover’s words sunk in, though, as he realized what Justin was saying and he quickly turned around to grab the saucepan by the handle and place it on an inactive burner.  “Ow!” he snarled as his hand came up against the metal side of the pan and he snatched his burned finger back, shaking it as if that would somehow take the sting away.

 

“Poor baby,” Justin cooed as he took Brian’s hand in his and brought the wounded index finger up to his mouth; he rounded his lips and promptly clamped them around the damaged flesh, sucking on it and swirling his tongue around it as Brian’s eyes darkened in response, the sharp pain quickly forgotten in place of a much more pleasurable sensation.

 

“All better?” Justin whispered huskily as he continued to hold onto Brian’s hand; the brunet smirked as he curled his fingers around Justin’s palm.

 

“Yeah,” he drawled.  “You still have that healing touch, Florence.” 

 

Justin grinned.  “Good to know,” he said as Brian curled his lips under in amusement.  “Just in case I ever need to fall back on my old day job.”

 

“I think I might have burned other parts of my body, too,” Brian informed him helpfully.  He took Justin’s hand and placed it over his cock as Justin laughed.  “This part is on fire, in fact.”

 

“Oh, we can’t have that,” Justin purred.  Thinking he was getting somewhere, Brian’s eyes widened in surprise and disappointment when he found his arms suddenly devoid of a warm, blond body as Justin broke off their embrace and walked over to the cupboard above the sink, reaching for a tall drinking glass.

 

“What are you doing?” Brian asked, puzzled, as he watched his lover filling up the glass with water from the tap.

 

Justin walked back over to stand next to him with the glass in his left hand.  “Just doing my civic duty; I’m helping to _put out your fire_.”  He grinned back at Brian with a playful smile as the brunet rolled his eyes.

 

“Smart-ass,” he groused.  He reached out to grab Justin’s wrist as they grappled over the glass; Brian reached out with his other hand to tickle the side of his lover’s waist where he knew it was especially sensitive, only to be rewarded with a sloshing of the water as Justin’s hand was jostled and the contents spilled all over Brian’s shirt, promptly drenching it all over his chest area.

 

Justin stood there, the now empty glass in his hand as he burst out laughing before thinking better of his action and clapping his hand over his mouth, but the damage had been done. 

 

Brian continued to hold firmly onto Justin’s wrist as Justin pursed his lips tightly together in an attempt to regain some semblance of seriousness.  “You think this is funny, _Florence_?” Brian growled; he couldn’t see Justin’s mouth behind his slender fingers, but he could tell by the twinkling of his eyes that he definitely did. 

 

Despite his annoyance, Brian couldn’t help thinking _God, I love this man_ before he narrowed his eyes at Justin and contemplated his next move.  While he wanted nothing more than to kiss away what he knew had to be an impertinent smirk hiding behind that pale hand, something else came over him as he kept hold of Justin with one hand and turned slightly to reach into the now lukewarm pan of spaghetti.

 

Justin’s face sobered in disbelief as Brian reached in with his bare hand and grabbed a few strands of the pasta.  He stared apprehensively at Brian’s face as his lover’s lips twisted into an evil sort of devilish smile. 

 

A flash of dread hit him as Justin replied quietly, “You wouldn’t dare…”   His pulse sped up, though, as Brian waggled his eyebrows back at him in response; a few seconds later, Brian scored a direct hit as four, wet, slimy strands of whole-wheat spaghetti hit him direct in the face and he heard Brian actually _chortle_.

 

“This is my new shirt!” Justin sputtered out in disgust as he hurriedly flung the slimy spaghetti out of his face as it landed on the laminate floor.  No sooner had he done so, however, than another round hit him square in the chest; he found his previously crisp, light-blue dress shirt promptly redecorated in swirls of wetness where the thin rods of cooked spaghetti had made their mark.

 

“See?  I’m an abstract painter now, too,” Brian proudly announced as he laughed at the priceless look of dismay on Justin’s beautiful face.  “That was a freebie,” he told him helpfully.  “No charge for you.”

 

“I can’t believe you DID that!” Justin growled as he broke free from Brian and tried unsuccessfully to wipe the stains off his shirt; holding his wet hands up in front of him, he looked for a dishtowel to dry them on before his eyes settled on a nearby object and a mischievous gleam appeared in his eyes as he smiled back brightly at Brian, who narrowed his eyes in suspicion. 

 

“Justin…”  He watched intently like a stalled car stopped on a train track without anywhere to go as his lover reached over to remove a towel keeping the pieces of Parmesan garlic bread warm on a white dinner plate.  Before Brian could utter so much as a “Don’t even try it,” Justin had wound his left arm back like a professional league pitcher and flung one of the buttery pieces directly at Brian, landing with a distinct thud as it hit Brian square in the face, right between his eyes.

 

“You little shit!” Brian snarled as Justin giggled in delight at his lover’s reaction.  The offending piece of bread landed with a thud at Brian’s feet; fortunately for Justin, the bread had merely hit Brian’s skin and not his designer shirt or the brunet’s face would have been even more red and angry.

 

“It’s the new Justin Taylor original,” Justin announced with a French accent as he waved his hand in the air like he was wielding a baton.  “ _Brian Kinney – pièce de résistance_.”  Before he met an untimely end, he reached over to pick up a couple of red, seedless grapes from a white, pottery fruit bowl and flung them in Brian’s direction for good measure; unfortunately, his aim wasn’t quite as precise this time as they wound up in the spaghetti sauce; he watched as they plopped into the pan and some large, fat drops of the thick, red liquid sloshed over the edge and onto the smooth cook top.  As he peered over somewhat nervously for Brian’s reaction, he couldn’t help adding, “Oops!  It’s the dreaded Grapes of Wrath!”

 

Brian was trying hard to keep a straight face, but inside he had to admit – the whole thing was funny as hell.  He didn’t know, though, whether to lecture Justin sternly over fucking up the kitchen that he had just paid his cleaning lady an outrageous amount to clean, or just saying to hell with it and demonstrating his own, accurate pitching skills.  He finally made his mind up as he smiled back sweetly at Justin and reached over to grab a green apple from the fruit bowl.

 

“Now wait just a min…” Justin didn’t quite get the words out before he had to quickly sidestep the object that was aimed directly at his crotch.  “Hey!” he said as he barely managed to avoid being hit.  “That’s off limits, asshole!”

 

Brian laughed heartily at Justin’s expression of annoyance.  “No, that’s located around back,” he helpfully told Justin as the blond scowled.  “Not so funny when you’re in the line of fire, is it, Florence?”  Justin backed up a few steps like he was retreating from Brian’s assault as he neared the refrigerator.  Keeping a sharp eye on the brunet, he slowly opened up the right door of the appliance and reached in to grab an object from the side bin, hiding it behind his back while he kept the door open to use as a defensive shield.

 

Brian slowly began to approach Justin, grabbing a lemon this time from the fruit bowl for self-defense.  “What have you got in your hand, Taylor?” he warily asked the blond, who scraped his lower lip with his teeth silently and shrugged his shoulders in response.  “Show it to me!”

 

“Just a little protein,” Justin finally volunteered.  “You always tell me that protein’s good for you,” he reported.  “Makes your skin glow and your bones strong.  Calcium’s good for that, too.”  He began to hide behind the refrigerator door as Brian kept creeping nearer and nearer.

 

“Don’t come any closer!” Justin warned him.  “I’m armed!”

 

“Ooh, I’m scared,” Brian retorted in a childlike voice as he kept approaching. 

 

Justin waited as long as he could until Brian was approximately four feet away before he darted out from behind the door and promptly lobbed a raw egg in the brunet’s direction like a softball; the fragile shell promptly broke into tiny pieces all over Brian’s face and began to slowly run down his neck, oozing underneath the V of his shirt.    

 

“Well, you egged me on,” Justin told him as he burst out laughing over his joke, thoroughly enjoying himself now.

 

“That’s it!” Brian announced as he rushed over and pounced on the now empty-handed blond who shrieked as Brian grabbed him and promptly mashed him against his chest and slammed their bodies against the now-closed refrigerator so they could both ‘enjoy’ his runny predicament. 

 

All the commotion coming from nearby was too much for a curious little boy to ignore as Gus came rushing over to the kitchen to see what all the hoopla was about.  He took one look at the mess on the floor and on his father and Justin before clapping his hands in excitement and jumping up and down in instant recognition; he had seen this same type of event before at school and I always looked like a lot of fun.  “Food fight, food fight!” he chanted boisterously as he giggled and bounced lightly up and down on his feet.  “Get him, Daddy!” 

 

Brian smiled at his son’s encouragement; he was such a smart kid.  “Gus, you don’t remember where we put the chocolate syrup the last time you were here, do you?”

 

“Brian!”  Justin sputtered as Gus nodded his head and proceeded to walk over to a nearby cupboard to try and help.  “Corrupting your own son?”  He scrunched up his nose in distaste at the thought of sticky chocolate syrup running down his hair, his face and the rest of his body, although… he wouldn’t mind licking it all up if _Brian_ were wearing it…

 

Unfortunately – or fortunately, depending upon how you looked at it – the potential weapon was located in an overhead cupboard above the coffee maker far above the little boy’s reach, much to Gus’s disappointment; he wanted to get in on the action, too.  “I can’t get it, Daddy,” the little boy said in disappointment as he reached his hands up futilely, the treasure way out of his grasp.  “I need my stool.” 

 

 

“Don’t you dare!” Justin shouted at Brian before he could open his mouth.  “We are NOT getting your son in the middle of this.  At least _one_ of us can go home clean.”

 

“Sorry, little man,” Brian told his son as he continued to gaze into Justin’s captivating blue eyes that were holding a mixture of vexation and resolution.  “I think we’ll have to keep that off the table until some other time.”

 

“But, Daddy, I wanted to have a food fight, too,” Gus told him, his lower lip sticking out in disappointment.  “Can I throw an egg like Jus’n did, then?” he suggested hopefully.  He began to walk over to the refrigerator and attempted to open the door, but it was sealed too well and was much too heavy for him to successfully carry out his wish.

 

Brian curled his lips under, almost tempted to take him up on it and let him have a go at Justin but finally deciding it wasn’t worth Hurricane Mel’s wrath when Lindsay arrived in a couple of hours to pick him up after dinner; at least, what was _left_ of dinner.  The spaghetti was cold and clumpy now, and the sauce, while still warm, wouldn’t be much good over clammy, chewy pasta.  And the bread?  Since a certain blond had decided to uncover it, the bread was cold now, too, and he _hated_ cold Garlic bread, almost as much as _reheated_ , cold Garlic bread. 

 

“Some other time, Gus,” he told his son as he glanced over at him.  As he heard him sigh in disappointment, he attempted to mollify him somewhat by adding, “Looks like we’ll have to order some pizza for dinner now, Buddy.  Someone who shall remain nameless has pretty much ruined my spaghetti.”  Justin looked over at him in astonishment at that statement.  He chose to studiously ignore the insinuation as to whom was to blame as he asked, “How about a pan pizza from Antonio’s and some Mozzarella dipping sticks instead?”

 

“Yay!” Gus said, quickly forgetting his idea to be part of the food fight.  “Pizza!  Pizza!”

 

 Brian shook his head; he was definitely being pulverized tonight on all fronts.  First he’s assaulted with high-carb bread by a blond with a wicked left hook, now he has to endure eating pizza for dinner, also?  This was the last time he even considered trying to cook, even if it only involved heating things up.   Besides, things were going to be heating up later, all right, especially after what this little shit he was currently holding firmly in his arms had started.

 

He gazed down into the said ‘little shit’s’ beautiful face, mesmerized by the flashes of silver in the wide, expressive blue eyes gazing back at him.  “As for YOU,” he murmured as Justin stared back at him silently.  “YOU are going to go start the hot water in the shower so we can get all this shit off our bodies.”  He lowered his voice so only Justin would hear the rest of what he had to say; he could see Gus gazing over at him curiously.  “And then you are going to get that tight little ass all primed up for some major pumping action later… Over and over and over again – as penance for the mess you’ve made in my kitchen.” 

 

He could feel Justin shiver a little in anticipation as he leaned down and bestowed a brief but firm kiss on the soft lips.  “This is your definition of punishment?” he asked Brian for clarification’s sake, just to make sure he should be dreading it.

 

“You’ll find out soon enough!”  Brian growled, promptly releasing Justin enough to spin him around and smack him on the ass. 

 

“Ow!” Justin cried out as he rubbed the offended ass cheek.  “Watch it!  That’s worth a lot more, now that I’m a bigwig at the hospital now.”

 

“You’ve been bad, Jus’n!” Gus reported, waggling his finger at the blond as he watched the two men tussle.  He didn’t get too many smacks on the butt himself – normally only on the rare times when he had done something he had been told not to do but he did it anyway – but he knew enough to realize that spanks on the butt were reserved for boys who misbehaved.

 

“You got _that_ right, Sonny Boy!” Brian called over to him.  “Now get going, Hot Shot!” Brian commanded as he gave Justin a slight shove toward the bathroom.  Justin batted his golden eyelashes at Brian and smiled coquettishly before turning to move toward the shower, emphasizing his hot ass as he wiggled it for show as he went. 

 

Brian felt his cock twitch in response, wanting nothing better than to eat a certain ass rather than some pizza, before he realized he had to take care of his son’s needs first.  Sighing, he walked over to pick up his cell phone lying near the front door, taking care not to step in any gooey, slimy, buttery shit on the floor.  “Why don’t you go back to the living room, Gus, while I call in our order?”  He suggested to his son, not wanting to risk the child spreading any goop into the other part of the loft.  As he called in their order and hung up the phone, he thought about how much he desperately needed to wash off all the gunk from his body; between the garlic bread, grapes, and egg now drying all over his skin and clothes that a certain southpaw had thrown at him, he thought he smelled like some Mediterranean culinary dish and not a very tasty one at that.  And he wasn’t even going to hazard a guess as to whether his expensive linen shirt was even salvageable.  Thinking he had probably lost his mind, but desperately needing to not only take a shower but also imbibe in a little pre-dinner appetizer, he called out to his son, “Gus?  If you want, and you’re _really, really_ careful, you can go ahead and use your top loader until the pizza gets here.”  He heard his son’s whoops of delight as he added, “But do NOT take the truck out of the sandbox, okay?”

 

He waited for his son’s excited “Okay, Daddy” before beginning to unbutton his shirt, wrinkling up his nose as he noticed how it stuck to his skin.  He didn’t even bother to worry about where it landed once he had it completely unbuttoned, throwing it in a heap near the bed as he walked into the bedroom.  The jeans and briefs were a little easier to remove, seeing as how they had been miraculously spared most of the impact earlier; they joined the crumpled shirt on the floor as he finished undressing and walked toward the bathroom, hearing the running of water clearly now.  He glanced behind his shoulder to make sure Gus was preoccupied before he walked inside the room, smirking as he noticed Justin’s clothes in a heap by the shower stall; remnants of spaghetti sauce were easily noticeable on his light-blue shirt.  He winced a little, actually feeling a little guilty over damaging one of his lover’s only good dress shirts; he had had to practically force Justin to go out and indulge in a few ‘power’ clothes for work, knowing that in his increasingly responsible position it was important he try to look more polished, but he also knew Justin could ill afford to throw his money away so cavalierly.  It was a sure bet that this shirt would not be reusable.  He silently vowed to take a certain someone out soon for a shopping expedition, whether his proud little blond spitfire was in agreement or not.  He could afford to be a little more generous with his money; Justin could not, at least not yet.  As he took a few moments to admire the rear view of Justin slowly lathering his lithe body with a loofah sponge, he couldn’t help thinking that once the blond eventually graduated from PIFA, no doubt he _would_ be successful in whatever he did, and if McKenzie was as smart as he appeared to be, he’ll scoop him up before the competition did.

 

Justin’s heartbeat sped up as he heard the shower door opening; turning around, he smiled at Brian a little anxiously, biting his lip a little as if he were trying to make sure Brian wasn’t mad at him.  He hadn’t _appeared_ to be angry earlier, but then again, Gus was nearby.  He could have been controlling his ire merely because he didn’t want to upset his son.  Now that they were alone, though, his earlier antics were bothering him.  He knew how fastidious Brian was about his loft, and the man had actually been trying to be considerate by preparing a meal for him and Gus.  He had returned the kindness by engaging in food warfare, instead, turning Brian’s neat, orderly kitchen into a mess-hall-style refugee camp. 

 

He watched with a little apprehension as Brian closed the door behind him and walked over to his side.  He raised his eyebrows in question as Brian quietly studied him.  “You realize you made a fucking mess out of my kitchen, don’t you?” the brunet asked, eyeing him intently. 

 

Justin stared back at him sheepishly.  “I know,” he said contritely, his voice soft with regret.  “I’m sorry.  I’ll clean it up.”

 

Brian smirked.  “That’s what I have a cleaning lady for,” he retorted.  He tongue flicked out to wet his lips as he walked closer.  He admired the shiny, alabaster skin on Justin’s chest as he reached with one hand and lightly trailed one long index finger down the breastbone, watching as the blond’s skin quivered in response.  “But you can pay me back in some _other_ way.”

 

Justin smiled in relief; he would be more than happy to serve _that_ sentence.  “What did you have in mind?” he asked innocently as he batted his eyes at Brian, whose lips twisted up in one corner.  He reached out with the loofah and began to slowly trail it over Brian’s left shoulder and down his arm, the soapy water slowly trickling down the bronzed, muscular skin before it dripped onto the floor below.  “I’m very experienced in giving sponge baths,” he purred seductively as he took the loofah and moved it over to Brian’s chest, slowly dragging it downward from just below his neck and then over to the left nipple and then the right, taking his time as the rough texture caused Brian’s dusky-colored nubs to wrinkle and harden in response.  He smiled, confident in the knowledge by now of how he was able to affect this gorgeous man, as he lowered his body along with the sponge while it slowly traveled down Brian’s flat stomach toward the thatch of curly, wiry hair just above his cock.  He squatted down to get a better look at his lover’s most impressive feature as he held onto Brian’s left thigh for support and gently started to stroke the hardened shaft in an up and down stroke, over and over again, until he heard Brian growl above him.  He stopped long enough to lift his gaze to stare at Brian through feathery eyelashes, his breathing ragged as he swallowed hard.  God, he wanted this man so badly…

 

He heard Brian growl, “Get your ass back up here,” as a pair of strong hands grasped his upper arms and firmly pulled him up, the loofah promptly forgotten as it fell to the floor; Brian roughly pulled his body flush with his as their lips smashed together.  He felt Brian’s tongue probing, demanding entry as he parted his lips and wound his arms around Brian’s waist.  He could feel their cocks trapped between them; it was exquisite torture as Brian deliberately twisted his body just enough to heighten the friction and Justin gasped as Brian’s tongue swabbed and ravaged the inside of his mouth.  The brunet came up for air just long enough to emit some sort of territorial growl before he dove back in, roughly grasping the back of Justin’s neck and angling his head to deepen their kiss as Justin’s pulse pounded in his ears like primitive beats of attraction.

 

The soap all over Brian’s body served to help Justin’s hands glide all over his back and buttocks in a smooth, sensual exploration as they continued to kiss; emboldened, he slid his fingers between the crack of Brian’s ass and tentatively poked a couple of them inside the puckered hole, hearing a echoing gasp of surprise as well as pleasure from his lover as they finally broke off their kiss and Brian stared darkly into his eyes.

 

“Fuck, I want you so bad,” Brian growled in admission as he began to rain kisses all over his lover’s neck; Justin sighed in pleasure as he curved his neck away from Brian obligingly to expose the creamy-colored flesh and his hands roamed all over Brian’s chiseled shoulders before grabbing onto his upper arms for balance.  He started in shock as he felt Brian bite down on his neck before he felt his lover’s tongue slowly washing over it in a soothing motion; that was something new.  Brian had never done that before, but he trusted Brian and knew what his lover was doing – he was telling the world that ‘ _you belong to me_ _and ONLY me,’_ and it filled him with a sense of pride as well as amazement that this incredible man wanted _him_ , Justin Taylor, an art student turned hospital therapist.  A man who, unlike Brian, was just beginning to find a way in the world and really didn’t know _where_ he would wind up yet.  But as Brian continued to nuzzle and lick his way around his neck and chest, holding onto his upper arms supportively, he couldn’t envision being anywhere else and his heart threatened to explore from sheer joy.  The words furiously trying to erupt out of his mouth leaped out before he could stop them, even though he knew they might scare the living daylights out of his lover.

 

“I love you,” he whispered, his eyes closed in bliss.  His heart stopped for a brief second, though, as he felt Brian stiffen slightly under his touch and stop kissing him.  Fearing he had made a huge mistake and had misjudged the intensity and depth of Brian’s feelings for him somehow, he dared to risk opening his eyes to stare up into the darkened orbs of the other man as their gazes locked together.  “Brian?” he whispered anxiously. 

 

“Turn around,” Brian commanded softly at last in response as he gently prodded him to face the shower wall.  Justin bit his lip as he complied, worried that he had made a big mistake in confessing his feelings to him.  But he was somewhat reassured by the tender tone of Brian’s voice, and he wanted him so badly that at that moment he chose to silently do as Brian asked. 

 

He heard the telltale ripping of a condom wrapper a few moments later as Brian released his grip on him briefly; soon afterward, he could feel Brian’s soapy hands preparing him and he closed his eyes as a mixture of emotions washed over him – anticipation, desire, and love combined with worry over what he had done.  As he felt the tip of Brian’s cock probing for entrance, and the warmth of his lover’s hands around his waist as he pulled their bodies together, however, his concerns were temporarily forgotten as he got lost in the wondrous emotions flooding through him, their bodies rocking together in perfect synchrony until at last as if they had choreographed it, they came together almost at the exact same time in a shuddering heap of heated sensations.

 

=================

 

_An Hour and a Half Later_

 

“Did you have fun with your Dad, Sweetheart?” Lindsay asked her son at the front door as she helped him put on his lightweight jacket.  The day, which had started out quite warm, had quickly cooled off with the sun setting and a strong, pre-storm wind blowing in from the north.

 

Gus nodded his head excitedly.  “Jus’n and Daddy were throwing food!” he promptly reported, his eyes alit with excitement; apparently that had been the highlight of his evening with his father.

 

“Throwing food?” Lindsay peered over at Brian, who was leaning against the front door, and then Justin who was standing nearby next to Brian’s computer desk.  Justin appeared embarrassed at Gus’s enthusiastic declaration as he averted his eyes downward; Brian, on the other hand, gazed back at her indifferently.  “It was more like artistic expression,” he told her vaguely as she furrowed her brow in confusion. 

 

She shook her head slightly, not even attempting to hazard a guess as to what her friend meant; she had learned long ago that Brian had a unique talent for putting his own spin on things.  As she gazed at her son’s happy face, though, she decided it didn’t matter; her son had obviously had a grand time, and that was all that was important to her.  It hadn’t been too long ago that they had taken such moments as these for granted, believing that a robust, happy-go-lucky child such as Gus would never have to worry about grown-up matters or being physically fragile, at least not for a long time.  His recent brush with death, though, had changed all that.  She – and Melanie and Brian – would never take any precious time with their son for granted ever again. 

 

“Well, it’s getting late, Sweetie, we’d better go,” she told her son as she zipped up his coat.  “Give your Daddy and Justin a hug and kiss goodbye, okay?”  She watched as Gus walked over to his father, who stooped down to wrap his son up in a fierce hug as the little boy bestowed a wet kiss on his cheek. 

 

“Bye, Daddy,” he said softly.  “I love you.”

 

Brian pulled back to look his son in the eyes and respond tenderly with no hint of awkwardness, “I love you, too, Buddy.”

 

Her heart warmed as Gus repeated the same action with Justin, who bent down to hold him close to his chest tenderly, brushing one hand briefly through the back of her son’s hair affectionately.  She wasn’t surprised when Gus repeated the same declaration of love to Justin – in the past few months her son had grown quite close to his former hospital orderly.  It seemed like lately, especially, Justin was constantly around when Gus came to visit his father, and she knew from what her son had told her after his visits that Justin often accompanied them on their outings.  She was grateful to the talented young man for all he had done for their son while he had been ill, and she personally liked Justin, but she confessed to being a little worried that Gus might get his fragile heart broken if for some reason Brian and Justin had a parting of the ways eventually.  Brian _seemed_ to care deeply for Justin – at least as much as he was capable of – but was it enough?  She didn’t want Justin to get _his_ heart broken, either.

 

“I’ll see you soon, Buddy,” she heard Justin whisper to her son as he gave him a kiss on the cheek.  She frowned a little, noticing that Justin seemed a little quieter and more subdued than normal.  She didn’t really know him that well, but she sensed that something was bothering him. 

 

“Justin?”  She called over to him as Gus scampered up to her, remembering that his apartment was on the way back to her and Melanie’s house.  “Would you like a lift home?” 

 

Before Justin could open his mouth to respond Brian replied firmly, “No, he’s not ready to leave yet.  I’ll take him home myself.”

 

“If you’re sure,” she said, glancing over at Justin, who lifted his eyes to peer over at her and finally nodded silently, his face an unreadable mask of emotion.  “Okay,” she answered finally, still not convinced, as Brian swung the door back to let them exit; she knew something was going on, but she apparently wasn’t going to find out tonight.  “I’ll see you guys later.”  Brian watched them walk over to the elevator and waited until they were onboard and it was descending downward before he swung the door back to close it, shrouding the loft in an eerie silence.

 

He gazed over at Justin, who was nervously playing with the cord of his landline phone, his eyes cast downward.  “Want something to drink?” he asked quietly as he walked over toward the kitchen, leaving Justin standing there by the door.

 

“No,” was the soft response.  “I’m not thirsty.”  Justin found himself feeling terribly awkward, now that he had allowed his innermost feelings to be revealed.  Ever since he had said those momentous three words in the shower, Brian had seemed uncomfortable around him.  Oh, they had went ahead and fucked, and they had made polite conversation around his son while munching on pizza slices as they watched a Disney movie in the living room (he frankly couldn’t even remember which one it was now…).  But it was like a two-ton gorilla was in the room now, oppressive and ominous.  He had actually been ready to jump at the chance to leave with Lindsay and Gus – feeling like Brian wanted some space – but his lover had quickly squashed that idea.  Why?  Was it because he wanted to hash things out with him, once and for all?  Tell him that while he found his company entertaining and the sex mind-blowing and he did care about him, that was as far as it went and it would _ever_ go?  He cursed himself silently, knowing that a proud, assertive and confident man such as Brian Kinney would be either highly amused by his emotional declaration of love or would merely belittle it as some twink fantasy come to life.  He was trying to present himself to Brian as a mature, responsible man; what had he been thinking?  That was the problem, though; he hadn’t thought about his earnest words of love before he had said them; it hadn’t been his brain speaking then, though – it had been his _heart_.  He wouldn’t take them back, however, no matter what happened; damn it, he _loved_ this man.  Let the chips fall where they may, then.

 

He watched as Brian walked over to the refrigerator, gingerly side-stepping the now-sticky floors of the kitchen as he retrieved a bottle of water and walked back over toward him, stopping a few feet away to study him intently while he took a swig from the bottle.  Justin felt his face warm at the intense scrutiny as he slowly lifted his eyes tentatively to stare into Brian’s, wondering what was going through his mind; even in his state of anxiety, he couldn’t help being fascinated as Brian’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down while he swallowed the water down his throat.  He let out a heavy breath before asking, “Why didn’t you let Lindsay drive me home?”  _Isn’t that what you wanted?  To get rid of me before I made an even BIGGER fool of myself?_

 

Brian set the bottle of water down on his computer table.  “Because we need to talk, and we couldn’t do that privately until Gus and Lindsay left.” 

 

Justin dragged his teeth across his upper lip and nodded, letting out his breath with a sigh.  He restlessly brushed one hand through his slightly shaggy hair. “I know what this is about,” he told Brian honestly.  “I should have never said what I said to you earlier.”

 

To his surprise, Brian walked closer to him and placed one hand under his chin, forcing him to meet his gaze directly.  “Why, Justin?” he asked the blond softly.  “Are you wanting to take it back?”

 

Justin swallowed hard, but he wasn’t going to lie to him.  “No,” he admitted.  “I… I _meant_ what I said.”

 

To his shock, he watched as the slightest hint of a smile appeared on Brian’s face as he heard him say one word:  “Good.”

 

Justin stared at him in disbelief for a few seconds, wondering if he had heard him right; that was _not_ the response he had anticipated.  “ _Good_?”

 

Brian’s lips twisted upward in the corner.  “That’s what I said, Mr. Taylor.  Do I need to repeat it?”

 

Justin licked his lips, trying to force the right words to come out.  “No, I heard you,” he said a little stiffly.  “But I don’t understand.  You _like_ the fact that I told you I loved you?”  He tried to look away, suddenly feeling like he was being unmasked, but Brian’s hand on his chin wouldn’t allow it.  The look he was receiving was so intense it almost felt like Brian was seeing right through him, straight to his innermost soul; it was both exhilarating and scary as hell.

 

Brian leaned in to rest his forehead against his as he whispered, “Of course I do, you twat.  It’s so much less complicated when both people feel the same way about each other.”

 

Justin pulled back in shock, unable to process what he had just heard.  Was Brian saying…?  Was it possible…?  Did he feel the same as he did?  “Brian?”

 

A smirk appeared on the handsome man’s face as he noticed the confused look.  “Yes, Florence?”

 

“No joking around, Brian!” the blond reprimanded him sternly, not wanting to make any mistake about this; this was far too important.  “Are you telling me that you…?”

 

Brian sighed; this was still so fucking hard for him; he wasn’t used to baring his soul or his heart to anyone; in fact, he had _never_ done this before with any man.  Hadn’t he already told Justin before that he was special?  Wasn’t that enough to tell Justin how he truly felt?  No… He knew it wasn’t for this man, because despite everything that Justin had accomplished in such a short time, he still was the type of person who wore his heart on his sleeve and needed things expressed in the way that Brian felt the most uncomfortable with; he supposed that was what made Justin such a perfect person for the job he was doing at the hospital.  It made him feel vulnerable as hell, yes, but for Justin, he would try to push through his awkwardness and discomfiture to express to him what was in his heart, _had_ been in his heart for some time now.  “That I love you?” he managed at last to whisper back, finding it not quite as scary to say as he thought it would be.  He watched Justin silently nod back at him, almost as if he were afraid to make any sudden moves for fear of freaking him out, which was a distinct possibility.  He plunged ahead, though, before he chickened out.  “Yes,” he breathed out, placing his hands on Justin’s upper arms firmly but gently to make sure he had his full attention, because he knew it would be a long time before he had the guts to say this again.  “ _Yes_ , God help me, damn it, but I fucking _love_ you, Justin Taylor.”  _There… I said it now; are you happy?_   He didn’t really need to actually ask Justin the question aloud, though, because the answer was written all over his face, which seemed to instantly transform itself into a thousand-watt illumination as his eyes began to shine even brighter with unshed tears and his mouth broke out into an almost blinding smile. 

 

Brian rolled his eyes.  “Does that answer your question?  Because I am NOT going to repeat it – maybe ever.”

 

Justin beamed, apparently indicating he could live with that condition, his smile making Brian’s heart skip a beat as he replied, “I think that might work.” 

 

Brian couldn’t help smiling back at him in relief as he shook his head; he was feeling downright exposed (and not in a typically good way), but he knew there was no turning back from this road now.  He was in it for the long haul, but surprisingly it didn’t scare the shit out of him quite like he thought it would.  “Good,” he answered, feeling a need to lighten the mood somewhat after his atypical confession of devotion.  “I’m glad we’ve got that settled, because I’m planning on owning your ass for the next several hours.” 

 

Justin stared into the mesmerizing eyes of his lover; his lips twisted up into a tender smile as he asked tentatively, “Only for the next several hours?”

 

_Little twat_.  Brian knew exactly what he was asking; didn’t they just cover this subject?  He growled, “You know what I mean, Mr. Taylor.  I have to give that hot little ass some rest in between fucking sessions.  After all, you DO spend a lot of time sitting down at work now.”   He leaned in to whisper in Justin’s ear, his hot breath washing over him like a sensual blanket, “But don’t think you’re getting away from me that easily; consider us fucking joined at the hip now.  I think my son would never speak to me again if I let his favorite orderly get away.” 

 

Justin reached up to cup his hands on either side of Brian’s face; his beautiful, expressive, yes, _loving_ face; his eyes were shining back at him, so open and gentle now, his lips turned up into a tender smile that told him so much.   “I’m not planning on going anywhere,” he whispered.

 

Brian’s hands slid around the slender waist to pull Justin in closer.  “Neither am I, _Orly_.  Neither am I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed this story, I would welcome comments. Also, should I post more of my stories on here? If you would like me to do that, please let me know. Thank you for reading.


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